BFP after IVF - anyone want to join me in the wait for first scan?

[HopefulllHolly]

Sensitive

Hi everyone,
I’ve just had our first cycle of IVF and although we had very slim odds of it working (low AMH, low AFC, male factor, which led to only 2 mature eggs which thankfully led to one perfect day 5 blast). We are absolutely amazed and over the moon that it worked despite everything, but I am really struggling with the wait for first scan. I almost feel with infertility (we TTC for 6/7 years) that it does make you anxious and I’m finding the wait to my first scan (6th June) unbearable. I don’t want to seem ungrateful but I really wish I could enjoy it or relax a little but instead I am worrying about miscarriage and things I can’t control. For me this has been the worst bit of IVF so far, and I’d love to just be able to be happy so I don’t look back (if it does work) and wish that I hadn’t been so anxious and scared.

Is anyone else in the same boat who wants to keep me company? 🥹 Or can provide some tips on how to distract myself and cope better? I know there’s nothing I can do to change the outcome and what will be will be, but I don’t think I’ve ever worried so much in my life.

Thank you 🙏

Hey! Just jumping over to this thread too now as I am also waiting for my scan like @hopefullsosbry I have got mine booked for the 3rd July which feels very far away! I have also felt like my symptoms have disappeared a bit the last few days and it is so difficult not to spiral into worry about it! This waiting with nothing else to do is hard. I ended up going to see Inside Out 2 at the cinema with my nieces yesterday which was fun - highly recommended if people are looking for a distraction!

Thanks ladies @DippyDuck19 @AnnieStar12 It’s just so scary. They all just disappear overnight and I don’t feel pregnant at all. Then you hear all these people who have missed miscarriages and they are meant to be like 3% chance or something now but it seems like so many people have them. It’s hard to stop worrying. I know nothing I do can change the outcome but I wish I could just calm down 🙁

Welcome @DogMummy87 and @hopefullsosbry ☺️ congrats again. Sorry you’ve joined when I’m mid doom spiral!
I want to go see inside out, may have to try and persuade someone to go with me.

I really enjoyed it - such a clever concept for a film! And you have an excuse to eat all the popcorn 😜
Oh don't worry! It is such a tricky time and we are all just trying to find our own way to manage through it. I am back to work properly tomorrow and feeling quite apprehensive about that. I was able to work from home all of last week which helped a lot. But I am also a bit hopeful that being busy and extra tired at the end of each day will help the time pass more quickly?! 🤷🏻‍♀️
We will see! Hope everyone has a relaxing Sunday whatever you are doing! 🙏🏻💜

@DogMummy87 I am on the 2nd July .. a day before you ! Ahhh ! It’s going to be along wait .. so glad we have this wait together and can hopefully bounce of each other .. 💖🤞🏽✨.. have you tested again since you OTD ? I am still testing and got 2-3 weeks today for tye 1st time .. not sure if it should be more than that as I will be 5 weeks tomorrow ? I’ll prob test ever 2 or 3 days now just to make sure line is progressing?! 🤷🏼‍♀️ might help put my mind at ease over the wait , I also have two beta booked next week.

@HopefulllHolly i really hope you are ok, it’s totally normal to worry, I think symptoms are renowned for coming and going so I am sure everything will be totally fine but it will be a worry, can you book a wee scan to see or would you rather wait ? When is your scan now ? Is that you 8 weeks now ?? Sending you hugs of support 💖

@DogMummy87@hopefullsosbry so great we all get to be on this thread from the ivf one!!

@hopefullsosbry Be careful if you keep testing as at some point there is too much HCG - the hook effect- can mean it stops getting darker. Personally I stopped on OTD but then had a panic a week later so did one more then.

@HopefulllHolly hope you’re feeling better today. x

I actually haven't tested since my OTD and am not planning to get any other tests until my scan on 3rd July 😱 mainly just because of how anxious I can get as a person generally and I think it would send me into overdrive keeping checking but not really knowing what I am looking for, you know? I do keep staring at my 3 positive tests to keep me upbeat and just telling myself that wherever will be, will be. And yaaaaay lovely to be on pretty much the same timeline!
Thinking positive and happy thoughts for us all wherever we are in this! 🙌🏻💕

@AnnieStar12 Ah ok .. thanks I will be wary of that !! That would freak me out seeing them not get darker .. I’ll prob stop testing after Tuesday once my 2nd beta is done🤞🏽😌..

@DogMummy87 i wish I had that will power, I just like to see it getting that wee bit darker 😂 but yeh I need to step away from them now I think .. 🤔

Has anyone reached the point of stopping the oestrogen and progesterone meds? I’m not supposed to stop until 12 weeks (just under 3 weeks away now) but I’m panicking about just stopping them dead in the water!

have been reading all your messages, it’s still so nice to know that all our feelings - good and bad - are so normal and common! All of you have definitely made this time less lonely for me.

early scans and testing etc - I had an early scan at 5+6 because of spotting, it did give me reassurance that the baby was in the right place and not ectopic, but that was it, it hasn’t stopped the worry or anxiety, even after 2nd scan at 8 weeks it’s just a count down to the private scan on June 23rd at 10+3.

Testing - please don’t put any faith into those clear blue with weeks indicator. I never ever got a 3+ and it made me have a mini breakdown, fast forward to scan where everything was absolutely fine. Urine tests are not accurate!

@DogMummy87 I do love the concept of them, the first one is great! Again one of those films I can’t wait to watch when I have a baby of my own. I think getting back to work will definitely help, I find the days I’m busy at work I barely think about it and don’t worry. I just started a new job and they’ve put me in for trips to London, Cardiff, Newcastle and Nottingham all in a month so I’m going to be knackered! But it’ll make the time pass. Thanks for the kind words 😊

@hopefullsosbry I have a private scan a week tomorrow so I’m just going to hold out for that rather than have too many. Plus I want to see the difference as I’ll be 9+4 days by then (I’m 8+3 today). Wouldn’t really mind about my symptoms going but all I have is cramps now, and your story of having a miscarriage at 10 weeks after the heartbeat has made me worry even more! I wish it was just a normal pregnancy and I was just content with my positive test until 12 weeks (I don’t know how people last that long without worrying!!).

@AnnieStar12 Thank you, don’t really feel better today but have loads of stuff around the house to do and my partner is on one about getting decorators in to do some stuff in our bedroom and one of the spare bedrooms (which will be a nursery) now. So he wants me to measure up loads of stuff for him to cost stuff up today 🙃🙃🙃 very cute he’s so excited for preparing for a baby but I am scared he’s jumping the gun. I suppose it needs doing anyway and we haven’t had the time to do it.

@LouP87 I was meant to stop mine 3 days ago (at 8 weeks because it was a fresh transfer) but I have a weeks worth left so I’ve just gone down to one pessary a day to go off them slowly. I think I’ll stop them tomorrow though as I should really listen to the doctors and the science and do what they say rather than self medicate, but I was too scared to come off them!

Ive been told to stay on the pesseries until 12 weeks pregnant 🤷‍♀️ so guess that must be another thing that varies from clinic to clinic!

I have read lots of women drop to one a day and then to one every other day, which I’m sure is mainly for mental reassurance that you’re weaning your body off. I think I’ll probably do that so it feels gradual.

@HopefulllHolly just a thought based on your last post - maybe the change in your symptoms is cause you’ve dropped the progesterone dose? Maybe some of what you were feeling was side effects from the pesseries? As sounds like you’ve noticed a change since halving the dose!

@AnnieStar12 @HopefulllHolly just what I was thinking! These extra hormones must be making us feel more symptoms than we would naturally so lowering the dose has got to explain lessening symptoms?

@HopefulllHolly I have a work trip to Madrid on the 7th July for 4 nights. I've been a bit anxious about that but the hospital said I will be absolutely fine to go as long as I stay cool (that will be tricky haha) and rest when I feel tired (also tricky as at a theatre festival working...but will do my best) I am glad I have my scan on the 3rd before going though as hoping that will give me the reassurance I need! 🙏🏻
We really need to do a big house clean today but I am honestly so low energy and exhausted. I feel bad for my partner as he is such a trooper and has been doing so much. Going to try and do what I can and definitely going to go for a longer dog walk today with my spaniel as I have been promising to do that all week. The tiredness has been the thing I have battled with most this last week - but I know getting out and moving will only help!
Is anyone actually exercising? I haven't braved it yet to do anything like I used to just in case!

@AnnieStar12 Yeah I asked the nurse and she said 12 weeks of pessaries for FETs and 8 weeks for fresh.

Yeah it could be my lack of pessaries but that would be very quick for such a dramatic change!

@DogMummy87 Yeah I keep promising to take my dog on a long walk but my legs feel like bags of cement at the moment, I can’t manage very far. It’s very frustrating! I’ve not really been exercising (and normally do exercise 5 days a week). Mainly as I’m knackered constantly. I’ve been trying to do some light yoga and stretching to help with mobility and have been debating whether to go back to the gym to do some light weights because of how much weight I’ve put on so quickly. But my other half isn’t keen I do that.
My other half has been a trooper too, he usually does quite a bit but I do all the cooking and washing but he’s started doing half the cooking every week which has massively helped. They are good! I tentatively wished him a happy Father’s Day today (I whispered it first thing this morning) and he got all welled up 🥹🥹🥹🥲 so sweet!

@hopefulllholly yes I am the same and usually workout 5 times a week which is so good for my mental health so I've been missing that. But I also do not want to risk any physical activity causing issues so I am happy to focus on rest for now and just trying to walk a wee bit every day when I can.
Ah we are very lucky to have great partners...watching mine vacuum as we speak 😜🤣
That is so cute about whispering father's day to him...I wrote a little PS about the little one in my belly on his fathers day card which I always get him from our two pups. Our dogs are very much our babies and always have been 😆🐾💜

@DogMummy87 Im a dog mum too. I am actually really scared of how he is going to react to a baby because he’s always been my baby. He’s a miniature dachshund and is my little shadow, so it’s going to be hard for him not having all my attention. Plus he hates crying baby noise 🤣 It actually makes me tear up (I’m very emotional at the moment lol!) thinking about what he might think. Especially as I won’t be able to pick him up anymore and he always wants to sit on my knee for cuddles. I already feel quite bad about it! Luckily he loves his dad so they are just going to have to stick together for a while 🙂

@LouP87 thanks for the reassurance .. I think I needed to hear that today re clear blue tests! Also I was told to stop the gel suppositories from today (OTD was yest) but to just continue with the lubion injections until the 1st scan. 🤷🏼‍♀️

@HopefulllHolly oh no I am sorry if I have cause some kind of anxiety for you, please don’t feel worried, we had really low HCG levels with that pregnancy and the fetous measured small from the very 1st scan , am sure everything will be ok with you, as the others have said it could be the lack of progesterone that is causing the decrease in symptoms, really sorry I didn’t mean to trigger anything. I was just worried and sharing that story as I actually have lower HCG this time round than that previous pregnancy, thats why I am so anxious about this one being a similar outcome😕but time will tell for me. sending you hugs and positivity 🥰💖

@hopefullsosbry Noooo! Please don’t apologise! I want you to be able to talk about it!! I’m just so anxious of missed miscarriage. I have fear of going to a scan and them saying that, that’s on me not you! Please please don’t apologise!

Absolutely this. We have a Springer Spaniel and a German Shepherd so two pretty big dogs 😜😆 they have both been around my niece who is now 6 and are so good with kids so I am excited about that! But not quite sure how they will cope with one living with them 24/7!! And, in particular, the baby stage! We will see!! 🤞🏻😆🙏🏻

Welcome @DogMummy87 & @hopefullsosbry. Congratulations on your bfp!!

@LouP87 I'm also a little worried about stopping the medication at 12 weeks. Guys told me to stop at the start or end of that week, whatever I'm comfortable with. I have my NHS 12 week scan on the 11th July when I will be 12+5. So if all ok then I will stop.

Hey thght I'd join ya's my 7 wk scan is 4th July seems so far away. my clinic don't do bloods test and I stopped progesterone day of positive test?!. I have no symptoms so do not feel pregnant at all just expect my period to come any day so nerve-wracking. Did any of you not have symptoms for week or so after bfp?

Hope it's ok to tentatively join this group- I recognise a few names across other boards. it's my otd tomorrow (should be 4+4 in theory) and hopefully I will know when my first scan will be

After 2.5 years ttc our first child and 2 rounds of ICSI this year, we've finally got our first BFP on a natural FET.

I'm so excited but so worried about the embryo being in the right place, and growing as they should be!! I think that will be everyday now until we finally get our baby in our arms as this doesn't feel real 🥹
I don’t know if you all feel the same but when it’s been such a struggle it just feels like it’s all going to be taken away from me before it even begins.

This mornings tests at 12dp5dt, seems strong for now?

Yay @Natty2 congratulations! So nice to see it worked from you, I think we were on a board together 😌Those lines look lovely and strong! Totally get what you mean about the worry. I was worried sick about the same things before my 7 week scan, and then had a week after it where I was ok, and now I’m back to worrying about missed miscarriage. It’s really not fun and I really didn’t think it’d be like this. I want to enjoy pregnancy after wanting to have a baby for so long. We’re definitely all in the same boat as you so can all relate. The ladies have been great at reassuring me on here ☺️ Let us know when you have your first scan booked! The wait for it isn’t fun but I’m sure baby will be safely tucked in the right place growing nicely so try and stay as hopeful as you can because honestly the worrying makes the wait even worse. Hard to do though I know!!

@Snowdrop131 Congratulations! I think I had symptoms in my first week but I think they could have been progesterone to be honest! I wouldn’t pay too much bother to symptoms really. I thought the worst before my scan as my symptoms kept disappearing but everything was fine. Trying to convince myself the same now 😅 How far along are you now? I think it’s pretty normal for the nausea and stuff not to kick in until at least 6 weeks - mine definitely didn’t - and even then they come and go. I felt totally normal the last 2 days and had a wobbler and today my boobs are on fire again, but otherwise all ok, so I’m really trying to just ignore the symptoms and stay positive as I can.

Hi, you are close to myself and @DogMummy87 who have our scans that week also , hope you are ok, some people don’t get symptoms at all so try not to worry , I guess if you are really worried you can book beta hcg bloods to confirm , I hage done this , but that’s completely a person choice. Congratulations on your positive though 💖