FET/IVF/ICSI - October 2033

[Lauralozzle]

Anyone due to start cycle/have transfer in October jump on board!

Little history:

TTC our first. Trying for 4 years. Officially unexplained but I only have one ovary that responds/works. Fertilisation issues. Positive Sperm Oxidative Stress Test (likely DNA Frag). So it’s really a bit of a mix.

Dec 22/Jan 23 - First ICSI cycle. 8 eggs, 6 mature, 2 fertilised. One poor blast to transfer. Nothing to freeze. BFN.

July 23 - Second ICSI cycle. Using AOA & ZyMot chip. 8 eggs, 8 mature, 4 fertilised. One fresh to transfer and 2 to freeze. BFN.

Oct 23 - First FET scheduled.

Currently waiting for my period to start so that FET cycle can start. Should start beginning of Oct, so FET likely towards end of the month.

@4thcyclelucky thanks for saying that. He's generally quite good but you're right I think the other partner can sometimes forget the entire process is gruelling its not just the injections or pills or collections or transfers but every day I don't have the luxury of not thinking about the entire thing even if I wanted to and I guess I think both things at once that we are both being a bit selfish.

I'm disappointed he wasn't more understanding of my feelings but at the same time he's had this date in his mind that he was working towards and now it seems it could be over sooner than that and he's confronted with the feelings that I feel most days.

And I know how rough and horrible that feels so I am respectful of that but also cmon you'd have to be stupid not to realise the burden is so heavily weighted on one side and I can't help but wonder how many men would put themselves through what so many of us have

@Lolly2507 "I don't have the luxury of not thinking about the entire thing even if I wanted to" Is so so spot on, I couldn't have said it better myself. There's no denying it's hard for both partners, but definitely more so for the person going through the stims/appointments/retrieval/transfer etc. We lose total control during IVF and I think that deciding when we want to test is the one thing we do have control over. It's so hard. Thinking of you lovely xx

@User491 - wishing you the very best for your transfer. I was fortunate enough to have twins from a two embryo transfer last FET.

That being said there are moments where if I could choose again I might do one at a time. It’s hard on the twins and hard on the parents. If you’re going to save an embryo they might otherwise not freeze I totally understand - otherwise one at a time statistically leads to better outcomes and the work is done in terms of the embryo is now here - it’s just timing!

mmm I feel a little bit conflicted writing that but there it is, it was a miracle and I am very blessed and now wouldn’t have it any other way but would never transfer two….. 🧐🤷🏻‍♀️🙅🏻‍♀️.

whatever you decide hope there are lovely kiddos in your future.

@Lolly2507 - you’re both going through a lot. While I think you should still keep behaving as PUPO and test on your target date, the possibility of it not having worked is super hard. It’s disappointing for you both and feels like you’ve both lost something.

Hope you have some time off today and get connected again and chat later. Thinking of you. Testing early is really hard for this reason…. As it’s still early and the test might not have been sensitive enough.

Hi all

7dp5dt today - losing hope a bit. Have had some v v light brown spotting over the weekend but today just wiped and had a little bit of like a brown and stringy mucus 😞 how are you not supposed to test!

Hey @User491 any update on your embryos this morning? We just got a call to say 4 have made it to day 5. One is 5AB quality, which of course is good but I can't help feeling disheartened as we got a 5AA last time. The rest are apparently at around grade 3 so they're unable to tell if we will have anything to freeze yet. Feels quite disappointing after 23 eggs collected 😥 I keep getting painful twinges in my ovaries this morning so I have a feeling they will scan me for transfer and decide to do a freeze instead. All the best for your transfer x

Hi @marshk, I commented on the thread back at the start of Oct and have been quietly following all you ladies in the background.
I'm 6dp5dt today and feel I'm losing hope as well 😔. Just seem to have all the usual symptoms before my period. Felt more optimistic a few days ago.

Could the brown discharge be implantation? Don't lose hope yet. Which I honestly know is easier said than done. I've literally drove myself crazy on Google for several days now 🤯

@marshk I too am 7dp5dt. I’ve caved and began testing after reading about others having positives at this stage.

I’ve been getting the faintest positives on Superdrug early PG tests. They only show after 5mins so could well be evaporation lines.

Either way, there’s little to no line progression which is what worries me the most. My symptoms are plateauing. I feel in my heart it’s another chemical as everything is pointing to the fact that HcG isn’t doubling as it should.

There have been many tears. I’m now trying to get my head around FET. Whether I could realistically be going again 14 days after the start of my next period (whenever that may be as they were irregular before).

Good luck to the rest of you!

@LuckyPineapple good luck!! The 2WW is torturous!
I hope you’re finding some moments of distraction.
Right now, only things I’m distracting myself with is Malteser’s 🤣

Me too im 8dp5dt but to be honest I'm not even thinking about it anymore. I'm pretty sure none of them have taken.
I'm supposed to test and report back my result on Friday but I don't think I'll be testing this week. I don't feel in the right headspace and I don't think i can bring myself to do another test. I'm still struggling mentally and physically to get back to some sort of normality

Hi @ThinkPink37, thank you. It really is torture. Funny, I had some maltesers last night. Leftover Halloween sweets 🙈

If you don't mind me asking, when did you start testing? I want to, but my partner is very against it and wants to wait until the weekend.

I hope the lines progress for you. It is so stressful and we put literally everything into this. Just for the chance that it will work.

Hi @MoonlightDreamer, It's such an emotional rollercoaster. You have to do what's best for you. I wish I could literally pull the thoughts from my head to get a break.

Good luck 🤞🏻

@MoonlightDreamer I really feel for you! The constant pull to want to know and yet fearing the crush of seeing a blank window is a constant limbo.
You may well be very pleasantly surprised though!

@LuckyPineapple I started testing at 5dp5dt. Your husband is probably right. My partner is sticking firm to the fact that HcG shouldn’t be in the urine system until 9dpo so is still positive. If I hadn’t had the CPs before, I’d have more faith too.

I hope your chance works out for you!!

Hoping I can join this thread. I posted in the other thread but reading through here seems closer to where I'm at. I'm 2dpt5dt. I had a fresh transfer on Saturday of a top grade embryo after an IVF/ICSI cycle. All seems fine, but noticed a little brown spotting 24 hours after the transfer so around lunch time yesterday. Noticed some more this morning. Spoke to the clinic and they said either irritation from my cervix or implantation. Of course I'm still super worried, has anyone got any experience of this and did it turn out to be ok?

Thank you everyone for your well wishes ❤️

@4thcyclelucky I think I will see what they say and take their advice.. such a difficult decision! Bless you, I'm so worried about the 2ww, I know last time I was obsessing over symptoms 🙈 let's hope it goes quickly for us!

@ThinkPink37 bless you, hopefully it's just because it's so early and difference of tests.. maybe it would be best to try a frer? It's still so early, try not to panic too much ❤️

@marshk hopefully it's nothing to worry about 🤞🏻 when is your OTD?

@Babyplease23 we won't hear anymore until we get to the clinic, I will let you know how we get on later.
That's still a good embryo, don't be too disheartened ❤️ will the leave the others an extra day maybe? Really hope you get some good news when you get there, and hopefully everything will be fine for you to get your fresh transfer 🤞🏻 let me know how you get on x

Hi @Socu3 I too had a fresh transfer on Sat 😊No symptoms whatsoever but I never really had any in my last 2.. (the first untested implanted but lost and the subsequent euploid did not implant).. Feeling all sorts, took a day off today to remain calm and just watching silly movies today!!

I think I'm going to start testing on Thursday...

Had egg collection today. They only got 4. Now I'm worried I won't end up with any embryos because of the drop off rate. Kind of thought I would be starting with 7 or 8 😞

@Kitt86 I only had 4 mature eggs suitable to use from my eggs collected and of that all 4 fertilised abeit one abnormally. From that I got 2 blastocysts so don't give up hope

Hi everyone … hope everyone is keeping good ?! Scan went great today looking at collecting upto 15 hopefully .. they had grew to 19s 20,21,22 so they was happy ! The nurse did tell me I had some fluid in there too did anyone else get told this ??? Cos now I’m majjjjj flapping about OHSS … egg collecting Wednesday nerves have officially kicking in 😳

Hi all, so went in for ma second scand today and barely could hold it toghether in there. She said I only have 5 good folicles. One was as 21 but they rest are under, 16,17, etc. I don t understand what happened. On friday they saw at least 8 decent ones and more that were under but it looks like nothing much happened over the weekend. She said that they did not expect loads cause I have a slight reduce ovarian reserve (12.5 pmol/l - which i didn`t think is extremely low). I don t know anymore.
Egg collection is on Wednesday ...don t even see the point in it. I could end up with nothing. And I am freking out about the egg collection at this point.
I just want this to be over...

@LuckyPineapple we've been at this ttc almost 18 years now and after so long you just learn to adjust and block it out. You become kinda numb to it. I just gave up believing it would ever happen for us.
Ivf wasn't something we could afford in our 20s and we were really discouraged by GPs that we were too young so nhs wasn't an option to us . Then when I entered my 30s we agreed we'd give ivf a shot. Its taken us years to get this far as covid held up everything. We took a huge financial hit so settled on pursuing our one eligble round with nhs while we tried to pull ourselves back out of a rut but we faced huge backlogs with waiting lists. I was quite calm through the whole process to be honest. I didn't have any expectations. We had a surprise miracle pregnancy last year but it turned out to be a chemical . After that It just did something to me. It ignited a little bit of hope i suppose. I drove myself absolutely insane with ovulation tests, bbt and pregnancy tests every month. Month after month bfn. I went into a really deep depression for months and struggled to get out of it. I finally found my ground and we jumped straight into medicated rounds of clomid then immediately onto ivf. I know its going to be negative given the rubbish quality embryos we put in and the fact my body just dosent feel recovered and ready to carry a baby after the ivf. Ive found the recovery brutal.I'm good at brushing it under the carpet and getting on with things but for me there's just something about seeing that BFN on a test that really hits me hard. I also don't want to know if I'm having another chemical . I think I'd rather wait it out and either AF will show and confirm it or if I am and its meant to be then I'll still be pregnant in another week or two . For now I think I'm best just focusing on other things for my own sanity.
It's way to early but I totally might put up the christmas tree this week to cheer myself up and make the house look really cosy 😀

@Kitt86 don’t worry they could be the best 4 you could get ! How was egg collection for you? Was you asleep ?

Thanks everyone for your kind messages. We got 1 fertilised and it was frozen immediately as Bart’s policy is to do that when there are 2 or fewer embryos. They shut over Christmas so will be looking to hopefully do a FET in January.

Feel really deflated and sad. I spoke to a doctor on Saturday because of the poor result. They said based on the number of follicles I had on the day during the procedure, they were expecting 8 eggs so to only physically retrieve 2 is a very poor result. They are going to review more to see if they can identify why my follicles were, well empty.

On top of that, I am so bloody constipated it’s mad. Is this normal? Can I take anything or do I just wait for nature to take it’s course?

@Melisss I think your fine , the trigger should give them a final push. They can grow at a rapid pace between now and Wednesday
I had a significant drop between first and second scan too . I think its really unpredictable. Only 4 of my eggs were suitable for treatment and we managed to get 2 blasts out of it so try and stay positive.
I know that's easier said than done and ironic coming from me since im a real negative nancy at the moment

@Woaaaahnelly welcome to the club. I've been constipated for weeks now 😆
I'm doubled in pain with my bowels everyday