IVF / FET March/April 2022 Thread 2

[AliceAbsolum]

Shiny new thread as we filled up the last one.

@Somatronic definitely day 1 today then- how exciting good luck with Stims tomorrow x

Wavering with the thought of early testing… it’s like some bizarre personality/psychology test seeing whether you follow the “rules” or not! I just feel massively tired, had some funny cramps/twinges a couple of days ago and am overhyping them in my head wondering if they could be implantation pains. Have been sorting through clothes to keep myself occupied. How is everyone else coping?

Hello all, I hope you’re doing well and fingers crossed for all of those in 2ww!

I haven’t been posting for a few days as wasn’t feeling great (headache, then a migraine).
Unfortunately I’m officially out of the 2ww- AF arrived yesterday at night (10dp5dt). This cycle was so tough, there was some excitement followed by loads of sadness. In fact I tested positive at 8dp5dt, but then in the morning 10dp5dt the line was extremely faint (?CP) and so I knew then that it’s over. I’m surprised that I got my period whilst still on progesterone pessaries, is if normal? Also, following transfer I started spotting from 4dpo (I thought it was associated with pessaries irritating the cervix, but now I think that maybe my progesterone was too low - I only had 3x200mg prescribed and I gather that most of you are on at least 800mg a day)?
I’m really dreading calling my clinic to tell them about my failure on Monday - it’s just so heartbreaking..

@Agapanthus13 I’m really sorry to hear your news about CP, I hope you’re looking after yourself xx

@Herewegoagain881 I’m so sorry to hear that :’( this process is so rough. It is normal to bleed through the progesterone don’t worry, it happens to me all the time (my AF usually set to arrive 1-2 days before my official test day, and it always has).
It’s definitely worth bringing up with your clinic, as I know some clinics will be willing to up the dose for this reason. Have they measured your levels at all?

@Nutrinerd that’s funny I also tried to distract myself last TWW by sorting clothes! There really comes a point for me when I’m less distracted if I just take a test - but you of course have to be prepared for the result not to be accurate either way. It is best just to wait…but some people just can’t and that’s okay too. It’s just about getting through the wait really!

@Herewegoagain881 :( I'm sorry. Makes the heart break worse when there was a line. I bleed on progesterone on my 1st 2 cycles, was on 400mg a day, but the last one and this one 800mg plus injectable progesterone in oil. I do think it's worth saying, it doesn't seem right to be able to bleed through it. Did they measure your levels in your blood in the 2ww?

@Hopingforamiracle11 I'm so sorry about the cp.. sending lots of hugs and keeping everything crossed for your next round..xxxx

I can't remember how much progesterone I was on in the first two rounds but it wasn't much and definitely started spotting before pregnancy test day. Now I'm on loads of progesterone so I definitely won't spot/bleed until I come off the meds. My clinic is progesterone mad, I think they think it is key for creating a lining that is nice and receptive to the embryo..and for me lots of progesterone is important as I don't think I naturally produce much. If progesterone is supposedly so important I find it a bit mad that they don't seem to really look at the individual more during this process and measure how much progesterone we naturally produce to get an idea of how much extra support we might need on the lead up to the transfer.

@nutrinerd I tested super early at 6dp5dt (frozen transfer so no trigger) and have generally been feeling worried about a cp since then. It's a tough call and personal, I think waiting is best and that's what I planned to do, but I mainly tested in the end for information purposes, as my progesterone levels on transfer day were 40% lower than they wanted (and 40% lower than my successful pregnancy) so I kind of wanted to know if the embryo implanted or not. Not that there couldn't be another gazillion reasons for successful/unsuccessful implantation, so who knows how helpful this information actually is.

But now that I tested early I'm daily testing to see if my line is progressing or not, which messes with my brain as there hasn't been much change in the past few days. If you can hold off and don't have any personal reasons why you feel the need to test early I'd say try and wait!

(Sorry I mixed you two up @Hopingforamiracle11 and @Herewegoagain881, your screennames look so similar in my brain!)

@SamTTC @AliceAbsolum @Herewegoagain881
Thank you for your support!
My progesterone was only measured in the past (waaay before IVF) to check for ovulation and it was in the lower range I would say and unfortunately there was no testing in 2ww. I will definitely ask them, hopefully won’t have to wait for the appointment too long.

@AliceAbsolum I like the approach they have in your clinic! what made you choose that clinic and not for example one of the ones in Czech Republic?

@Herewegoagain881 good luck with your testing x Yeah, nhs funded cycles are not ideal in terms of personalised approach at least in my experience, but obviously lots of people succeed! Could you please let me know what is FET like? When does the medication start and what dpo is the transfer?

I’m feeling down and feel so sorry for my DH who is trying to cheer me up even though he is just as heartbroken. I’ve been looking at IVF abroad as well as adoption, when I at least try to make some plans I feel a little more at ease. Do you ladies have ever had plans in your head like at what point to you stop if you’re unsuccessful? I’m a mess today and feel like it will never work for me, sorry to be ruining the mood.

@Hopingforamiracle11 I'm so sorry to hear this. It's feels so unfair. It's never easy, I'm dreading test day and in my heart I already know I'm out but it doesn't make it any easier.
Thinking of you. I was so naive coming into this process, totally believing that it worked 90% of the time and I was out before the transfer really.

I'm on 2x400mg a day and was told they had to be 12 hours apart and not to be late with them. Sorry for TMI but my boobs are so sore that they even hurt in the shower when the water hits them.

I don't think my progesterone was measured, on ET I asked for my AMH twice and they couldn't find it. So on my next cycle I want everything re-checked before I put us through this again. I now,know HFEA have specific guidelines and I'll be asking for all of it to be re-checked.

I am off work after 8th April until 19th, test date is the 13th because I know I'm not going to be ok. My other half is off for 2 days and we have decided that if it's negative we are going to do the same as @HJen22 and go and get 2 plants for the garden one for each embie to mark our grief. @HJen22 told me about a book How to cope with IVF by Silvia Dunn and it gives some coping strategies in there and has given me pointers for the next cycle. I downloaded it on the kindle app.

We have no Frosties so have decided that we will have our next NHS round and then pay for 2 more.

My OH doesn't want to adopt right now but I think he's trying to remain positive, when we had the day 5 bad news he told me this was a trial run, we need to do more research ask more questions and try again. He may change his mind .
Adoption is normal in my wider family and I can honestly say that it makes absolutely no difference to love and family life, they have always known they were adopted we have always known but it's not spoken about unless they bring it up and they never do, some are adults now- some still children and I don't think any of my friends know- maybe their parents remember when they joined our family but they are family and that's all that matters.

Don't be sorry about ruining the mood- if we all got good news and this process was not extremely stressful and tough none of us would be on this forum, because it wouldn't be needed. We are all on here to get support and advice from people going through the same so we understand the heartbreak.
So use us, use this chat- we are all hear for you.

X

I'm so sorry to hear how rough this process is for you all. I know the feeling. I always berate myself for becoming too invested, for feeling too much or pinning too much hope on this process, but how can any of us not? We are voluntarily injecting ourselves with drugs that make us hyper emotional, in a process that can make or break our future - and we know that tiny tweaks might make a difference, but we also know that it is so arbitrary from woman to woman and clinic to clinic, so we feel completely powerless. OF COURSE this process is hard and painful and wears you down.

The key is finding ways to cope and to keep looking ahead. Like this thread, like planting flowers to honour the embryos we created that didn't take, like booking time off and allowing ourselves the grace of the emotional reaction that, quite frankly, we owe ourselves to have.

I hope we can help each other get through this, because it really is about getting through.

("Make or break our future" was a bad way of putting it, I hope you know what I meant! I meant it in the sense that this process is shaping our future in one way or another, maybe the way we initially thought or maybe in a way that we might have to take some time to get used to, but which will turn out to be just as fulfilling. I fully believe that whatever the outcome of these cycles, we are learning something about ourselves and what we want out of life, and we will find a way to make it happen - whether through IVF or other ways.)

@SamTTC completely makes sense- that's exactly how it feels make or break.

Hope your doing ok?

I think I am but then I realise I have no motivation at all, at the moment x

@Hopingforamiracle11 I went to the Czech Republic for my 2nd round and had the most horrific time. It was so bad they actually refunded us half the money.

Plus Cyprus did a tandem cycle, so I did stims with my eggs, the donor did stims with hers, DHs sperm was injected into all of them and you see what you get at day 5. It was a really good way psychologically for me to move on from my eggs completely and forever. Then you know even if yours don't work out you have the donors, and she gave us 5 top quality blasts. I got 1 embryo and they put 1 of the donors in, which was a headf*ck, but that's a whole other story.
I kind of like the way this clinic "over medicate" it's such an expensive and stressful thing to do I want everything thrown at it. Makes me angry the way the nhs clinics do the absolute minimum to save money.

If you're looking into clinics abroad I'd suggest NewLife, Serum, IVI or Miracle with Dr F.

@PMAmostofthetime I’m keeping my fingers crossed for you - the fact that your embies survived 5 days is an indication that they are strong and also it’s a fact that embryos are happier in the womb than in the Petri dish. xx That sounds like a good plan! And plenty of opportunities to succeed xx thank you for your kind words! I’m looking at all options right now also including embryo adoption. I’m going to get that book, thank you x

@SamTTC thank you very much, you’re totally right and your post really moved me. x

@Hopingforamiracle11 so sorry to hear this, I know not a lot can console you at this time and you need to give yourself time to grieve and go through all the emotions. And when you're ready, think about your next steps.

I foolishly jumped straight in and maybe should have taken time to think about options moving forwards.

Re: progesterone, my clinic never checked levels on my 2 fresh transfers but they have said they will be doing now before just before ET as a matter of course for all patients as there seems to be a lot of discussion and research going on about this. In my 2nd fresh transfer I was on 400mg progesterone twice a day and started my period 7dp5dt! It looks like my body definitely needs a push with meds as "normal" doses do nothing!

In the discussion of 3 V 5 day transfer, my thoughts were that 3 day transfers were for ones that maybe wouldn't make it to day 5 therefore a better chance by being in the natural environment. But your 5 day embryos may generally be of a better quality. However, from numerous people I know, often it hasn't been their best embryo that has taken them to motherhood. Such a minefield for all of us that go through it! And then confusing that my clinic don't do 3 day transfers and they won't put 2 back in!

I hope everyone who is on there 2WW is doing okay and not going too crazy with the overthinking 🥰

@Hopingforamiracle11 Thank you for your support when your having a difficult time.

Looking at all the options is the best way. How many cycles have you had of you don't mind me asking?

X

@Hopingforamiracle11 honestly this whole process is so ridiculously hard..no one realises how awful it is other than those going through it, please feel free to share all your feelings, we're all here to support each other xxx

For an FET the process/timing probably depends on the clinic and whether or not you are doing a medicated cycle, but for me it was 50 days from a natural period until embryo transfer day. I did a medicated cycle.

In terms of what happened, after a natural period, I waited 14 days, and then took norehisterone for 10 days and another medication a week after. Then after 5 days of stopping the norehisterone I started bleeding, had a scan a day or so later, and then started taking estrogen shortly after (which helps builds up the lining). About 2 weeks later I had another scan to see how thick my lining was and was given the go ahead to start progesterone. If the lining isn't thick enough they may have you continue in estrogen for a few days and recheck.

I took progesterone for 5 days, and the transfer then happened on the 6th day of taking progesterone xxx

After my egg collection yesterday I was very positive about having a good fertilisation rate and having to choose between day 3 and day 5 transfer.
Got the phone call from the embryologist this morning. 6 out of 11 were suitable for ICSI.
Today 4 have been discarded; 2 didn't fertilise and 2 were abnormal.
So 1 of the eggs have been put into an embryscope to check and see if it has fully fertilised and 1 has fertilised but may be abnormal. Feeling really rubbish right now. Praying the 2 eggs make it to day 3.

@Coops0406 thank you x
That’s interesting about progesterone, I’ll ask if they could do the testing next time, or at least increase my dose, thanks for info!

@PMAmostofthetime of course I don’t mind - it’s my first cycle ever (fresh transfer). I have 3 blasts frozen, so my second NHS funded cycle will be FET.

@Herewegoagain881thank you x I was told that my clinic always does medicated FET so it’s really good to know, thanks x

@Greenisland101 I’ll be keeping my fingers crossed! remember that it only takes one xx

@AliceAbsolum Who was your nightmare cycle with in the Czech Republic?

@Hopingforamiracle11 i am so sorry for what you’re going through and I totally get having plans. When I first tried IVF with my own eggs we were told that I had virtually no chance and they were right because I never made it to egg collection. However I already had a list of donor clinics ready to go and contacted my top choices the day after my cycle was cancelled. We had decided to do 3 rounds of donor eggs and if that don’t work to move onto a surrogate and if that didn’t work adoption. It’s always good to have a plan and something to look forward to.

I’m currently on 4dp5dt and freaking out that I put the wrong dosage in for my thyroid pills last week 50mg instead of 125mg and overall paranoid that I’m not getting enough symptoms and scared things are going the same way they did this summer with a bfn.

@TommieNC Reprofit in Brno.

Hi all, thank you so much for your kind words and support yesterday & today. Sorry I haven’t responded back, I’ve just taken it so hard. I have read them all though, and appreciate each and every one 💕 I think finally seeing a positive line after 4.5years of trying only for it to go so quickly was more than I was ready to deal with. This whole process really is so cruel.

@Hopingforamiracle11 I’m so so sorry to read your post this morning. Sounds very similar to what I’ve experienced the last few days. It’s just heartbreaking isn’t it x hope you’re taking the time to look after yourself today. We’re all here to chat if you need it xxx

Love the idea of a plant to remember our little embies 💕After my previous failed round I brought a little circular necklace which my husband and I (privately) refer to my circle of life necklace to remember those embies. I love that it’s so close to me and it brings me a lot of personal comfort 💕

Regarding progesterone- those who have tested during your 2ww what have your clinic done? Regular blood tests or just one offs? I had bloods taken the day before EC but nothing after. I was on 400mg pessaries morning & night. Def something I’ll ask about for future.

And on the NHS front, the clinic I went to were really attentive and I certainly didn’t think the scrimped on treatment, care or meds. I couldn’t really fault them. I only moved as I felt I needed a change and I wanted to go somewhere where they offered a financial package.

For those asking I’m very fortunate this round to have 5frosties (last cycle I only got 2embryos in total so totally down to the success of my new clinic and the fact they had the info on my previous round to review in detail). The nurse said it may be possible to go straight onto a FET this month but I need to discuss with the consultant first. I had a medicated FET the time before last and we already discussed trying natural this time.

How’s everyone else getting on today? Xxx

@AliceAbsolum I know of several women from my clinic in Zlin who went there first and also had bad experiences and transferred to Zlin.
Im happy you’re in a better clinic.

@TommieNC I honestly questioned whether they actually put an embryo back or not. I really would not be surprised if there was nothing in that tube. It's messed up. Plus who doesn't wash their hands or wear gloves before they scan you or do a procedure? Urgh