ABC IVF thread continued

[StarryHannah]

Our other thread is now full so thought I would start this one to continue the chat.

@Beaglemum91 I'm waiting for my period so I can start meds for FET so that is really helpful information about the embryo transfer process. Thank you. Did you have your partner on Facetime or anything for it?

@Icsi2021 so excited for you xxx

@Hanopolis maybe it varies from clinic to clinic. Or maybe it was actually the Treatment Consultation they said she had to be at, not the initial one. Either way, she would have wanted to be in both, and I wanted her there too. It's hard that she isn't biologically involved so it's important for us that she can come to as many appointments as possible (only the virtual ones, thanks to Covid). It's definitely not overboard to have your husband there - IVF is a big deal and I think it's good for both partners to know as much about the process as they can.

Had my review call and they couldn't shed much light than either a genetic abnormality with embryo or bad luck (at the end of the day there's still a 60ish% chance it doesn't work right. So they recommend a FET. I asked about some of the things the Dr said they would check for if I did a lap surgery and they basically ruled them out. They said they would see if I had fluid in my tubes, that large endo would have been seen and small areas don't affect outcomes. I highly doubt I have endo as I have no symptoms but at this point I honestly feel like anything is possible. I'm doubting if having the surgery is the right thing to do. I never wanted to have it in the first place without good strong reason and they just keep saying it's the only way to absolutely make sure. Makes sure of what...anything we won't know until we're are in there. Seems like a checkbox ticking exercise as opposed to personalised care for me based on my results.

So now I'm very confused about next steps.

Also just to add not overboard having your partner there this is intense and heavy take all the support you can get. I wish my husband could come to more of the appointments and he would but covid!

Hi all, just popping back in to say hello and nice to see some new names, good luck to everyone on your journey Glad to hear it all went so well @kittyfantastico21 and you have so many frozen, your transfer will be here before you know it!

I’ve been struggling since my failed cycle, mainly the fact that I didn’t get any to freeze and something seemed to go so wrong from day 3 to 5, makes me worried about quality and that it would all go the same next time. Looking into counselling as I’m not doing great mentally. Feeling a bit in limbo about next steps, my period was weirdly light which is another worry and I don’t really feel like I know when to expect my next one. Had some calls with the clinic, they can’t really explain why it happened that way after such a promising start but said they would probably try menopur instead and maybe change timing of trigger and do a freeze all. Also recommended both of us try impryl (yay, another expensive supplement!). Just weighing up whether to go back for another try or wait our NHS slot - can get back in touch with NHS in august, which is our 2-year mark, but imagine there will then be some more waiting involved to process the referrals. Whereas abc could probably get us back in again in august itself.

@Hoping4baby21 sorry you’re struggling around what to do next to, it does sound like confusing information..maybe not that strong a case for surgery if there’s no signs there is anything wrong on that front? Are you thinking you might plan for your FET in August if not? Sending all good wishes your way whatever you decide x

@Clapham4 I'm definitely not looking forward to the injections. The thought of them makes me really nervous and I'd rather DH do it but at the same time I'm a total control freak so wouldn't trust anyone but me to do it properly 😂 How about you? Also, how did your call go today?

@Becky105 sorry to hear that things have been delayed for you. I suppose it's the best way forward to achieve the best possible outcome for you. At least you know you won't have long to wait to get started. Good luck choosing a sperm donor!

@Hoping4baby21 Glad to hear from you again! So pleased that you're feeling better. It must have been tough those first few days but you've been so strong and I know your resilience will get you that perfect, gorgeous baby you deserve 💕 It's good you asked abc about fluid in tubes and endo. Could you ask them to write a letter stating that during your ET there was no evidence of either and so it's safe to assume that HSG and Lap are not necessary? Maybe that will help convince the NHS to move onto the next stage and avoid wasting anyone's time. It's all probably a lot for you and there's no rush to make any decisions right now. Do research and ask questions but remember IVF doesn't always work first time so don't put too much pressure on yourself (easier said than done!)

@Hanopolis Nice numbers! At my scan with abc I was worried as back in January (at another fertility clinic) the scan showed 11 follicles in one ovary and 23 in the other!! Luckily this time around they saw 10 follicles in each ovary so I'm cautious but less worried about about OHSS. So don't worry about having a little less follicles this time, you still have loads regardless!

Also, the consultant asked whether DH would join but he was in a work meeting so she said I shouldn't worry about it, that I could just relay the info to him. He managed to join towards the end of the call though but his presence didn't really make much difference. I made sure to record what was said using the voice recorder on my phone and played it back to hime.

@Hopeful1234567 How are you doing today lovely?

@Jh2019 So sorry to hear you're not in a good place. If you ever need to talk, we're all here for you and we'll all try to support you as best as we can for sure! Counselling is a good idea and I hope it helps you sort through everything. It's hard enough making fertility decisions without the added heartbreak and disappointment. Theres definitely lots to think about but I'm sure you'll make the right decision for you and your other half ❤️

Thanks to all who asked 💕
I had my call today, it went well I think😅🤞🏼Turns out because my scan was at the very end of my cycle and so close to my period starting it means the AFC isn’t entirely accurate. So the count of 12 probably means there were more follicles that month, because after you ovulate they decline and can be missed behind bigger follicles. She said ideally all base scans should be in the first 2 weeks of a cycle but as that would be so restrictive they don’t enforce that. But I do still need the AMH level to confirm regardless because the count was 12. The plan for now is we continue as though I’ve been selected and if the AMH ends up being to low then I’d go to Create, and if it’s a normal range I can start on my next cycle 😬. Although I think I might stick with the NHS for a few months before paying the big private fees.

@Hanopolis so glad to hear your scan went so well yesterday!! That’s fab news! As I just mentioned apparently the AFC scan can miss some follicles so it’s not 100% accurate so you might have more in the other ovary than what they saw. And you still have lots anyways! Xx

@Hoping4baby21 I’m very sorry to hear they can’t give you a reason and are making you go for further investigations. I think someone else said this too but definitely see if you can get some sort of letter for the NHS so you can skip some of the needless hoops / tests. Xx

@Jh2019 I’m also very sorry to hear you’re struggling. And really hoping you start to feel okay soon, going through this is the worst and it really does take a toll mentally. I feel like a different person from my journey so far already. Definitely try and speak to someone, it will really help. And just because they can’t give you a reason why it didn’t work isn’t a bad thing, it could just be bad luck and next time will be the one🤞🏼

@unCliche oh I’m the exact same about hating needles and wanting to make DH do it but I can imagine me losing it with him if it’s not done how I think it should be. At least we can blame any outbursts on the drugs 🙈

Hope everyone else is doing okay. As someone’s already said we deserve medals!!!
Medals all round🎖🎖🎖🎖🎖

@unCliche Thankyou for asking. I’m doing okay as I can do just nervous for the result as just have my usual period systems. Xx

@Jh2019 so sorry to hear what you are going through. You are such a brave and strong person. Really hoping that it all works out for you xxx

Hopefully🙈. Just so nervous to find out. I remember waiting for my frozen transfer it felt like ages as wasn’t expecting it but it did fly by tbh! Xxx

@unCliche that is a very very good point! I might very well ask them if they could do that! Great suggestion, I wonder if the NHS would accept it.

I'm all for hubby doing the injections, I like to be in control too but I found it to be a nice experience. Would you let your partner try one and see how you go? In any case do what you feel most comfortable with!

I'm definitely going to do some more research but I'm leaning towards delaying the surgery and doing a FET but I'm not certain when they said I could do it as early as July cycle (my next period will be due mid July). @Jh2019 I honestly don't know when I'll do it or what. I have no idea. 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️ I just don't want to have an unnecessary surgery but also if something is going on finding out sooner than later would be better but so far there's no strong case to do it. I keep going round in circles about it. I can't tell if I'm wanting to rush by doing the FET instead of taking a more slow and steady approach with the surgery etc and being more informed ahead of next FET. There are pros and cons to both.

@Jh2019 counselling is a good idea if you feel like it's having a negative impact on your mental health. I've thought about it just to talk through my feelings. I think it's a good choice regardless, can't hurt. I hope you find it helpful.

Why did they suggest the impryl? What does that improve?

@Becky105 sorry to hear about your TSH levels but glad you have another plan and date and they have you on the meds to give you the best shot.

@Hoping4baby21 i'm sorry to hear your follow-up call led to more confusion. But it does sound like maybe the surgery isn't necessary in your case and perhaps it was down to bad luck that your first cycle was unsuccessful. Take all the time you need to sort through the information and your feelings and don't rush a decision. You still have another excellent embryo frozen and ready for you when you're ready to try again.

@Jh2019 thanks! I'm so sorry you're having such a tough time. Counselling definitely sounds like a good idea. That sounds frustrating that the clinic didn't really have answers, but it's good that they've come up with some ways to make some changes for another cycle if you do decide to go again with them. In the meantime, sending you lots of hugs and support, and I hope you can find some strategies to help yourself feel better soon.

@Clapham4 great that your scan went well! Fingers crossed for your AMH result! That's interesting about the timing of baseline scans, I had no idea about that and also had mine right at the end of my cycle. Also, to you and @unCliche and anyone else dreading the injections - they really don't hurt at all! And bemfola (if you have those) are really, really easy to do. I know it doesn't help that much to hear it from others and you'll probably be nervous until you've done the first one and found out for yourself but I just wanted to give some reassurance.

Thanks @kittyfantastico21 yep it’s bemfola I would be on, so thrilled to know it’s not as bad as expected! I think I’ve come to terms with the needles now. Just have to get on with it!! And how are you getting on? Is time dragging or flying waiting for July? Did you find the ivf drugs effected your mood or anything when you did them? Xxx

@Clapham4 the injections really are fine once you get over the initial hurdle of fear, I'm sure you'll find that too. I didn't experience any emotional side effects at all. The last few days before EC I felt a bit bloated but generally I felt fine throughout the injections phase.

Time is really dragging! But I have my FET consultation on Tuesday so at least that'll feel like a bit of progress.

Hope you all have a lovely weekend!

@kittyfantastico21 is Thursday FET consultation the first one you will be having? It would be great to know more about the process?

One thing I'd like to know is if they check or monitor your progesterone in the TWW, they don't in the fresh and because I obviously had some bleeding (brown and only a little) I'm wondering if the progesterone wasn't enough. I plan to ask them, but have they told you anything so far about the process?

Hi everyone! Good to know there is this thread and I can see there have been quite few pregnancy after 1 treatment cycle. It gives me a lot of reassurance. I have my treatment consultation on Monday and due to start on the 26/27th this month. Hopefully meds will arrive on time but my patient coordinator said if not I can go to the clinic to get the injections. Hopefully everything will go as planned in terms of timing as this month has been quite intense (I have changed my start date few times) but it ready helped me to go through my fears and anxiety and now I feel ready to start. Is there anyone starting in the next week or so?

@Hoping4baby21 yes the consultation on Tuesday will be my first one for FET. I don’t really know much about the process so I’ll report back as much info as I can! @Hopeful1234567 may be able to answer your question about monitoring though as she’s had a FET with abc recently.

@Francesmalin welcome! I’m glad this thread has been able to help with your anxieties about treatment. Very exciting that you’ll be starting treatment so soon! Fingers crossed for your meds arriving in time to save you a trip to the clinic. I’m waiting for a FET cycle and won’t be starting that for a few weeks still but I think some others will be starting fresh cycles sooner.

@Hoping4baby21.
I had a scan on Day 9, Day 14 and Day 16. From there I was told to take the pessaries x3 a day. Transfer was Day 22. They kept checking my lining, got to 7.4mm and then went ahead with the transfer. I haven’t had any bleeding yet but know they can delay a period. I did have some on the day after transfer but presumed because of the procedure. They didn’t monitor my progesterone and I haven’t even had a phone call from them to ask how I am doing since the transfer. I haven’t had the best experience with them really but hoping it’s all worth it. Hope this helps. X

Also from Day 2 I have been taking tablets to thicken my lining. Started at x 3 a day now on x4 a day xx

@Hopeful1234567 thank you that is really helpful. That is my concern and I think once it hasn't worked you want more "handholding" or just plain old reassurance and know that they are personalising things a little. I'm tempted if I'm honest to go with create IF they provide a more personalised service. For my reassurance. I don't spot in a normal cycle if I'm on all this progesterone why did I spot? Does that med not work for me? But how can they know if they never did a progesterone blood test check before or after?

I may be overthinking things but a lot rides on this and it's heartbreaking if unsuccessful I want to be as sure as possible we did everything we could. I think that is fair!

My lining was 7mm on day 6 of my fresh cycle so I'm wondering if mine was too thick (my research suggests this is a possibility) but if they are only monitoring you by day 9 for me that could be too and it get too thick again.

I believe in ABC and Create stats and results but at the moment something is feeling a little off in regards to communication.

I'm glad things seem like they are going well for you so far! Fingers crossed for you. Did you have a fresh cycle before with them? What was your lining like them?

@Hoping4baby21 No problem. totally can understand everything you’ve said there tbh. They told me my lining was actually just in the threshold on the final scan. Apparently they like 7mm-10mm. I was like 😅. My lining before egg collection was 10mm apparently but had to stop treatment as I came unwell so this is my first transfer.

I do think they need to monitor it tbh. I have my test on monday and dreading it as if it doesn’t work I’ll over think things like you’ve said checking the progesterone etc. there are things and questions I haven’t asked that I should have asked but didn’t know or was told before going into the IVF.

Communication is really not their strong point tbh, I just feel we’ve not been told things we needed to know and not been checked on after or inbetween treatment. I just know my lining was great before I did IVF so don’t really know why it needs thickening. Xx

@Hopeful1234567 I don't think your lining NEEDS thickening I think it is just standard protocol and that is what the drugs do. I think the fresh cycle drugs probably speed up the lining process for some too much so maybe that is the discrepancy for the FET because the drugs are different and less intense. But I totally agree with you there are questions i wish I had asked but it all feels so intimidating so sometimes you don't and kick yourself after. It's so standard for them that I think they forget to explain.

The progesterone thing will be important to me so if they refuse I'm not sure I'll move forward honestly, I don't want any regrets after if it doesn't work and a couple blood tests seems the least they can do it's not like I wouldn't be paying for them anyway!

Wishing you all the best for the test date and I'm sure it is us just over thinking they do this so much. But the flip side is this is such a big thing for us and we should be able to and made to feel as comfortable as possible.

@Hoping4baby21 Althoigg I didn’t end up doing a fresh transfer. I have preferred the break and the build up to FET.

Totally understand that and I think you’re right to ask for those blood tests to be done as you don’t want any regrets and want to feel you’ve done everything possible.

Thankyou, I hope so, I am the most over thinker and googler but it’s really hard because you want to get excited but can’t in some ways because of the hurt. It is a massive thing and a brave thing to do to go through this process and deal with the uncertainty. I just don’t feel like my experience has made me feel at ease and although they’re all lovely the constant different opinions from different consultants (I’ve only seen the same one twice throughout this journey) is off putting 🙈 .

@Hopeful1234567 I'm similar to you in regards to overthinking and I agree because you don't see the same person it is off putting. But from what I have read most clinics are the same so not sure it would change much.

@Hoping4baby21 yeah seems to be the case for a lot of people. Did a test this morning using a cheap test probably the worse thing to do as it was a straight negative and just completely had a melt down. When are you starting your FET? Xx

@Hopeful1234567 I’m so sorry you got a negative test today, sending you virtual hugs and lots of support. I hope you have good support in real life too to help you through the sadness. Will you still do a test on your test day?

Thanks for the info on the FET process, that’s really helpful.

@Hoping4baby21 I think it definitely makes sense to push them to monitor your progesterone, given your experience with spotting in your fresh cycle.

@kittyfantastico21 Thankyou. I have a blood test tomorrow so will see what comes from that but don’t have high hopes about it. It was the best embryo we have aswell but must not be meant to be xxx