The TMI April onward IVF thread

[AliceAbsolum]

@hopingforbabyd @pleaseletitbeme @phreedam @westywoo @mouse1234567 @viletta @hoping1 @twiglet2353

A bunch of April IVF ladies onto another round. Graduates and waiters we like hearing from you too.

[Viletta]

@BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay I think we need to look past words to people's true intentions. They often do t know how we feel and what to say. My best friend told me today that perhaps I had 3 failed cycles because subconsciously I don't want children. She called me and apologized and of course she meant it all well and loved me. I still told her to go duck herself and we laughed. No matter how interested she is in my journey though there s this I traversable distance between people who know how this feels like all of you here lovely ladies and people who don't. When is your cycle starting? Good luck!

[Hopingforbabyd]

Agreeing with @Viletta many people don't know what to say and say dumb shit because they feel awkward. I read this once when I was super mad and it made me laugh www.babygaga.com/15-things-to-never-say-to-a-woman-going-through-ivf/

[BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay]

We are booking in for October. We want to give ourselves another couple of months of trying, are then going on holiday end of Sept and then going to do it.

I’m just like what an odd comment - I’m gutted that nothing is happening naturally and scared IVF doesn’t work and we end up even more disappointed.

Thanks for your words of encouragement/ understanding.

I have told selected people what is happening but then feel awkward with people I’ve not told and then the ones I do tell don’t necessarily respond how I expect!

[Viletta]

@BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay
It's hard to accept that you have to go IVF root. I told people "we are working on it" without specifying what's going on and questions like "when are you planning to have kids" stopped. I found it helpful to also be open with selected people. Do t be gutted, also sometimes it happens naturally while you are trying IVF, anything is possible. Hopefully one way or another you'll get there! Patience and persistence. It will all fall into place slowly.

[BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay]

Thank you. I think I am just finding it hard to accept. I know lots of people have IVF but I feel like no one else I know has these issues.

[Hopingforbabyd]

@BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay long reply coming lol I felt just the same. It can feel like such a lonely process, I was so bitter towards the world. I hated everyone who had a baby or announced a pregnancy. Strong I know but that's how I felt. Complete bitterness. I got a lot of clarity once when I went to a psychic medium (big on the old "signs and shiz") it was just after we were referred and he picked up on it and told me "this is your journey and there's a reason why special people like you are picked" it didn't help at the time but I embraced his words and thought Dya know what, we are pretty special and this baby - when they decide to grace our path - will be so loved. I also made a little journal and I write in it my deepest thoughts and feelings and I've addressed it to "our future baby, the one we long for" it gave me a sense of clarity that we WILL get there and one day I'll be able to give them the book. I've never read it back as it's quite dark but it helped a lot. But honestly, you will find so many other people around you on the way whether that be a friend of a friend, a relative, a work colleague or even just someone you end up chatting to that have been through it too. I've met around 5 ladies since I started this journey and it's nice to know we're not alone (I never would've guessed either). You are never alone and we are all here to support you along the way. I hope this gives you some comfort, I so desperately wanted to find someone to talk to when we first were diagnosed and struggled to find anyone who would reply so the loneliness felt even worse, I felt I was going insane. Then I stumbled across these threads, I made one back in March and the support has been incredible x

[BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay]

Thank you.

What is annoying me is people saying “it might still happen”, suchandsuch had a baby at 44 blah blah blah

Do they really think they know better than the fertility specialists who are saying if we don’t do IVF it may never happen ??!!

[BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay]

I honestly think people don’t realise that when people confide in you you don’t need to offer advice. Just flipping listen.

Another one is “oh but you have a great life”. Well yeah but that doesn’t mean I don’t want children!

[Viletta]

@BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay gold words!

[Hopingforbabyd]

@BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay they are the worst kind!! They will never know how lucky they are.

[Wesstywoo]

I'm with you ladies and people who comment on TTC in general "don't you want kids then?" - inside I'm screaming if only you knew the hellish path we've been on for the last 4 years, outside I smile and brush it off. Thank goodness for having you ladies to talk to!!

[Hopingforbabyd]

Ladies, I just wanted to share with you and thank you all so much for being a part of my journey. If there's one thing I have learnt along the way, it's to trust your body - even when it feels like it has given up on you and being told there's a very slim chance it may not happen...you know yourself well enough to know the hope and faith you hold can make bloody miracles happen! I will be sticking around as I KNOW you will all get there too, stay strong and be kind to yourselves. Thank you so much. Lots of love as always 💛

[Russkispy]

@Hopingforbabyd absolutely fantastic! May it continue all the way and you have your special one in the arms at the end of this journey

[Wesstywoo]

Congratulations @Hopingforbabyd fabulous news xx

[Twiglet2353]

@Hopingforbabyd honestly those lines though 😍!! Can't wait for further updates xx

[AliceAbsolum]

@Hopingforbabyd You so deserved this. Thrilled with those amazing lines! I really hope you have a calm pregnancy, you're due some luck after coping with IVF. Be well lovely lady xx

[Viletta]

@Hopingforbabyd congratulations!! Hope everything goes smoothly from now on! Xxx

[Hopingforbabyd]

Thanks everyone 😘 ringing the clinic in the morning I'm a bit nervous for the next steps. It all feels very surreal and like I'm in a dream ready for someone to wake me up. But I'll go with it. I'll never ever forget my journey it's been a long 3 years but finally, that sunshine at the end of a storm may just be peeking through 🥰 xx

[Pleaseletitbeme]

How is everyone feeling?
I’m unbelievably constipated. :-(
Have resorted to some senna and I’m hoping for gentle predictable relief in the morning! Hahahaha.

[AliceAbsolum]

@Viletta Do you know if reprofit do immune testing / treatment? 4 years TTC under 35 with no apparent sperm issues and 2 failed good blasts later.... I'm worried about putting good embryos in and wasting them.

[BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay]

Anyone else subjected to constant baby talk from their friends?
I find it quite hard. There’s one WhatsApp group I’d quite like to just leave 🙈

[Viletta]

@AliceAbsolum I have a consultation with them in September and will let you know. I did ask after first fresh failed cycle with them if there is anything I can do to improve implantation chances and was sent a 3 page list of tests including dummy cycle with endometrium biopsy to test receptivity. I was under impression that prednizolone should solve immune response issues. Will let you know what they tell me.

@Pleaseletitbeme I remember seeing some treatment that's allowed for pregnant women for it. Be careful though and check with your clinic or gp as not all of them are good for you as they cause contractions in bowels that are close to the uterus. I know that natural remedies like brewing figs and prunes in hot water once a day and eating them and drinking water is fine.

[Viletta]

@AliceAbsolum I'm also on IVF abroad recommendations thread and keeping an eye on posts about NewLife in Greece.