Keith's BPG II

[KittyKatSmile]

@AliciaWhiskers @CornishMaid1 @Ginandtonic31 @Cauliflower82 @Welshpugmomma @Mrbay @Zest11 @RRoonilWazlib @Weenumpty

Hope this works xx

Aww sorry to hear that @Ginandtonic31 hope your DH is ok must be so hard being so close to your due date too :( look after yourself and that Baba, my friend had high fluid but on a return visit it had gone back to normal,hopefully yours will do the same and won't cause you any dramas...

@KittyKatSmile deffo feel like I'm missing out on the spritz I don't have any of that... I do however have a million pads of all shapes sizes and even the pull up sort haha , also got lots of frozen cool pads that u just shake to activate hoping they'll provide some relief ;) are you getting any Braxton Hicks/contractions yet? Times coming soon for you!

@Cauliflower82 deffo feel like I need some grooming and tlc down there been very neglected for about 9 months haha , alsoooo so I had my appt yest baby is weighing 7.7lb @36 weeks it's gonna be a big one but the dr. Was good at making me feel comfortable and didn't mention any early inductions etc... Phew well for 1 week anyway, weekly appts now one week at a time!
@Zest11 that's great about the movements very reassuring for you! Do u know what your having? Sorry if I missed that!

@Ginandtonic31 I’m so sorry to hear your news about your mother in law - that’s just devastating especially so close to your due date. Sending you and your family lots of love and hoping that you’re all coping okay.
I would say try not to worry too much about baby girl but obviously you’re going to - we’re programmed that way with all we’ve gone through, but it’s very reassuring that they’re monitoring you extra closely and they are looking after you really well.

@KittyKatSmile yes, this is the one I saw - I’ll get it! I don’t know what I’d do without you guys 🤗.

@zest11 it makes me so happy to read your news about your 20 week scan. I’m so glad your baby is doing well. You’ve just been so amazing throughout this whole journey. I noticed you called your baby ‘him’ - does this mean another boy is on the horizon? 👦 I was the same with movements - took me ages to distinguish what they actually were.

So, speaking of pain relief. I had my usual midwife appointment today, not consultant like yesterday. She’s new and a pain in my arse and I am incredibly difficult to frustrate. So, she asks how I am. Very well, blah blah, conscious Pip is getting massive. She kept saying to me ‘well our bodies naturally give us what we can handle - you’ll be fine. Our bodies naturally know what they’re doing.’ Again and again. When speaking of pain relief, ‘most women these days get by with just hypnobirthing and breathing techniques, our bodies naturally know what they’re doing...’ Anyway, I got frustrated and ended up snapping. I was so annoyed 😠! You’re speaking to a woman who tried NATURALLY to get pregnant for years and then relied heavily on science. Sometimes our bodies need a bit of help and my body is one of those bodies.
Ugh! She also examined my bump and asked if a student midwife could touch which I’m fine with - all for training. She then proceeded to tell the student to remember the woman this morning with the perfect bump with the baby in the correct position, this baby was not in the correct position - he’s back to back and not cooperating. I don’t know if I’m being sensitive but wtf my bump is just fine and Pip will continue to move around in there until he comes out.

@Welshpugmomma oh wow another big baby!! Are you feeling the extra weight? My pelvis is so sore at the moment.

What a drone on today from me 😆

Happy Valentine’s Day 💕

oh @Ginandtonic31, I'm so sorry to read about your MIL, I hope you and your DH are ok.

thanks for the well wishes on Thursday girls but it was a BFN. I spent Thursday night on my own (I asked DH if he could just leave me to it), I sat in the bath for a hour drinking gin, eating carrots and hummus whilst watching YouTube!

Thursday I wasn't sure if I'd start another cycle but after talking it through we'll do the next cycle and see what happens.

I've got an appointment with the consultant on Wednesday, I've got a few questions around why it failed, additional tests etc but anything you would personally ask in my position?

@Mrbay so sorry to hear it wasn't different news.

I would probably ask: what they are going to do differently this time (sounds aggressive but put it on them and indicate you're not happy with just the numbers game)
What else/different you should be doing. Are there more supplements you should be taking, were there any early signs with your lining etc?

(Will you be doing FET or the full thing? Sorry, I can't remember)

Sending much love. Plus kudos for eating carrots. I would have eaten a whole pizza. Or maybe a whole carrot cake xx

I've got to start a new cycle, I've used up my 3 embryos and the last one didn't thaw correctly so I'm sure that this is the main reason for failure this time.

Yep, I'm going to be a lot more confident with them, just before I am extremely lucky to have funding, doesn't mean they have more time/cycles to play with!

I'm currently overhauling my diet, I feel like utter crap with the 2-stone/1-dress size increase. As I'm taking a 2-3 month break from it all, I would like to be my pre-IVF/broken horse weight!

@Mrbay that's a great attitude to go in with. Let me know if you want the photo of my clinic's nutritionist's suggestions. Who knows what can help but I do believe quite a lot in throwing a lot of mud at the wall in the hope that something will stick...

@Mrbay I am so sorry to read your news. I am pleased you are going to try another cycle though. After my 1st failed round I came across this article. www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=283000.0 basically a guide to all the reasons IVF may not have worked and the potential solutions. Very helpful. As Kittykat says ask what they will do differently and maybe ask about some of the things in the article. Don't afraid to be assertive. Also, when my consultant refused to do extra tests (I needed 3 fails for them to do that) I also went to my GP who could do a bit. Honestly, use everyone, try everything - this is your body, your future and your family. Good luck xx

@welshpugmomma I am glad your last appointment went well. I hope this week's is equally as positive. And yes, we are having a boy!

@cauliflower82 Your midwife sounds so insensitive, you would have thought in that profession they would have compassion, tact and empathy!! Some people! Do what you want and don't let anyone persuade you otherwise. Thank you for your kind words, I have to say I have found this forum so so incredibly helpful and supportive throughout all of this and I am so glad we are still going. I am really looking forward to the next few weeks for some of you :) Very exciting and I can't wait to see who has the leap year baby! And yes our baby is a little boy too :) xx

@Mrbay I’m really sorry to hear your news. I hope you and your husband are doing okay and you’re fully prepped for your appointment tomorrow. Like the others, I think it’s amazing you’ve decided to go for another cycle. I don’t really know what advice to offer for tomorrow other than to say good luck and to be open minded. Hopefully whoever you talk to already has some ideas about things that can be done differently this time.

@Zest11 yay, a little baby boy too - congratulations. Like you, I’ve found this board incredibly helpful and supportive too especially when actually going through the ivf. I was reading my blog the other day (private blog, just on my home computer) and it was my first entry when I’d picked up all my drugs from the hospital - I remember bringing everything home and thinking I can’t do this and totally freaking out but then deciding to start my own thread on here and it’s been my lifeline.

I hope everyone is doing well. I am becoming very conscious that some of you now are exceptionally close as I remember being one of the last ones to actually test during the summer. 36 weeks on Thursday for me, spritz for bits packed and starting to feel more excited now than scared.

@KittyKatSmile - would you mind? I need all the help I can get!

@zest11, @cauliflower82 - thank you for your kind words.

@zest11 - I'll have a read through - thank you.

Whatever it meant to be, will be - sometimes I do worry if my optimism is the high before the low but I suppose I've always been one to cling to the facts rather than the emotions.

I still can't be head around that its been 9-months for most of you, I am very excited for you all!

I thought I'd give you all an update following last nights meeting with the dr.

Well, he was absolutely lovely, started the meeting by asking how we were and when we replied all ok, he pushed and asked no how are you mentally etc

We talked through various tests and extra, to which he replied the practice would ask me to push these but I'm not as they do not fit you both - very refreshing!

He's recommended supplements for us both and allowed to go on the pill whilst we wait to start our next cycle.

I feel so happy that even if we are not successful, I'm not having to face having a period for the foreseeable - selfish I know but they are so painful.

We'll both having a bit of a lifestyle overhaul with diet and exercise so hopefully this will show some improvements.

Hi everyone. Sorry for not responding and thank you all for your kind messages. We are just trying to get through each day at the moment.

@Mrbay I was sad to read your news but it was lovely as I read upwards to see your positivity too. Keep strong xxx

I'm 37 weeks today and just had a scan to check fluid and it's back down luckily. So no more scans until 40 weeks now just to check she hasn't gone over 90th percentile. She's just on the top like at the moment. I had my midwife Monday and we logged my preferences on the computer. At the moment I'm all for hypnobirthing breathing and gas and air. And I put that I wanted a waterbirth. I will see how I go as I'm quite aware that this could change on the day. The consultant also added to it today that I don't want inducing unless absolutely necessary. So let's do what she decides to do herself 😂 she's head down and engaged so just waiting to see. I've done most of my hospital bag. Her nursery isn't yet finished 😂

Hi Ladies. Apologies to intrude your thread but I've got a question and do not really know who to ask. Pregnancy threads are amazing, but I feel I would rather get some advice from people who also went through infertility and know what's at stake here.

Mine is my first ICSI pregnancy and I am 21 weeks. I have been extremely worried throughout the whole time, had multiple scans and just started to relax a bit when I started feeling baby's movements a couple of weeks ago (if it moves, at least it's still alive).

When I had a private 15w scan, the head of the baby was measuring small compared to the other parts of the body (like in the 10th percentile). I had my 20w scan a couple of days ago and the baby would not be cooperative at all. The sonographer struggled a lot to take measurements and sent me multiple times to the toilet/eating chocolate/you name it) to make it move. It eventually put itself in a slightly less awkward position and she managed to get some measurements (but kept repeating that position was not helping and baby would not stay still).

In the report the head measures approx 40th percentile, which reassured me a bit, but they also stated very clearly that vision was compromised by fetal position. Should I take another (private) 20w scan? I am worried all these scans (which are to manage my anxiety rather than for medical reasons) might hurt the baby. On the other hand, that 20w scan certainly did not put my mind at ease. What would you do?

Again apologies for jumping in, but I could not find other threads with pregnant ladies from IVF which are at a more advance stage than I am (and who sound so level-headed!!!)

Hi @Lalla525 not sure about level headed haha but we have stuck by eachother and are a friendly bunch :) haven't been in the same situation as yourself but I have had what feels like PLENTY of scans probably Round the 15 mark, I've asked and they said the exposure is minimal and virtually no risk from the ultrasound waves. There are people in the pregnancy who have scans on a very regular basis throughout entire pregnancy. there is no harm in booking another private scan to reassure you on the measurements however I guess you need to prepare yourself in case it's not the outcome you would like or if baby still doesn't co operate. Take care and try to enjoy the second half of your pregnancy :)

@Lalla525 I would say that baby's measurements can go up and down throughout pregnancy. A couple of scans my baby had a small head, now she's normal. She had a normal tummy, now she's measuring big. It's just an indication and every baby and person is an individual and won't be text book. Have they booked you for growth scans if concerned?

@KittyKatSmile how's everything? I'm so aware when I get a notification from Mumsnet that it may be you making the first announcement ;) haha crazy how it all seems to have come around so fast!

@Cauliflower82 such a crappy experience with the midwife it's shocking how some people are in completely the wrong career like what is she teaching that student any news on induction date?v every week now I have a little panic in case this is the week they say induction or csection, I just really need to hold out the 2 weeks so I don't have to go through this alone!

@Ginandtonic31 good news that the fluid levels returned to normal and baby is comfy :) hope DH and yourself are looking after eachother through what must feel like the toughest time. I need to figure out what to write down on birthing plan so I can get it printed to give in the hospital, I've been watching the us one born every minute normally that show terrifies me but I just need to know what to expect, basically everyone goes for an epi here, I will try to see what the pain is like and only have it if I really feel like I can't cope. Otherwise the hospital no chose seems pretty strictish monitored and IV from minute admitted so can move around very little , going to try and stay at home as long as I can ;)

@zest11 how is everything going? Enjoyed half term I'm sure :) do you feel like the pregnancy is going quick, are the movements getting more frequent now? My baba gave me a bit of a scare last week and I was the stupid one because I just reassured myself that it was ok as when I took time to do the whole lie down in A quiet room he/she was doing the min. 10 movements over 2 hours, when I went for my appt on Tues I mentioned it and they were like no the movements should be roughly the same each day so there shouldn't be noticeable changes in pattern at this stage .... Suitably told off ! But just in case anyone has the same or you have it later on :)

@Mrbay sounds positive with the whole overhaul of diet and mind, a new cycle sounds good almost a fresh start but with added knowledge :) you are so thoughtful thinking Bout your DH having to stay here whilst you go through this! That's very good that they do this, and least you will have given it everything , I'd be afraid if I left too big a gap I wouldn't go back- the emotional rollercoaster that it is. Good luck and everything crossed for you as always xx

Hope you all have a lovely weekend ladies :) x

@Welshpugmomma I have used a really good website to do a visual birth plan so you basically pick these little icons and put into a word document. I really didn't plan on doing a plan (ha!) but then I really don't want to see my placenta so I built the whole thing round that!
Here's the link:
www.pinterandmartin.com/vbp

@Mrbay I haven't forgotten you, I'm just struggling with the house move to find the right notebook. I will do it.

@Lalla525 I am blushing both that you think we are whatever you called us and that you managed to find us. You must have trawled through a lot of dross!! Extra scans won't hurt the baby and you should definitely do it for your peace of mind.

As for me: well I'm officially on maternity leave from today so I'm just finishing off the knitting list and sorting out the house. I've persuaded my hospital to give me a sweep on Thursday so I guess I'll know more then about when I can expect an appearance! I asked for a sweep because I suddenly became anxious that they would start me off on my due date but it would still take another 6 days.... now that I've finished work I might start drinking raspberry leaf tea and having loads of sex. Oh wait. No. Just the tea then :-)

Love to you all x

@Mrbay I’m so happy to hear that the doctor you saw was good and offered tailored advice and support. I honestly believe it just makes all the difference to good mental health when going through this if we have medical professionals we can absolutely trust and put our faith into.

@Ginandtonic31 excellent news! It sounds like things are coming together for you very well now in preparation for what’s hopefully to be a chilled out relaxed birth. Pip has now went just above 95th percentile - and to think ivf babies are known to be smaller 🙄.

@Lalla525 congratulations on your pregnancy. If I was you, I’d just pay for an extra scan personally. I understand you don’t want become reliant on them to help anxiety but I definitely feel like in your shoes I’d be wanting another just to put my mind at rest. Have they organised for you to have a follow up? I sometimes feel that with ivf the clinic looks after you so well (or mine did anyway) that nothing else quite matches up. I miss the old nurses still from the fertility clinic I used.

@Welshpugmomma the student seemed lovely to be honest and in my head I like to think she was mortified at the midwife 😂. Is it completely standard to get induced in the states? I’m really really worried about it - I should get my date on Wednesday at my next growth scan, officially 37 weeks according to NHS (really 36+6). You get the option of being induced in my area with ivf but they are really advising it as baby is so big now, above 95th percentile and I have three completely benign tumours on my liver they’re worried about during delivery due to potential bleeding - my low iron is not helping. I still hate those freaking tablets. I’m scared of pain ☹️ 😂.

@KittyKatSmile Happy maternity leave! Could you let us know what your sweep is like on Thursday? I hope it’s successful - it worked for my friend last year at 38 weeks so hopefully it does for you too.

Not much to report for me now atm - it’s snowing heavily up here right now and I intend to stay indoors all day hugging my dog. We’re pretty much all sorted for Pip’s arrival - I’m getting so excited to meet him now and see what he looks like. Hopefully he takes after my husband who has the most beautiful blonde wavy hair, curly when he was a child 😂 😂.

I hope you’re all well. Sending lots of love as I feel big days are approaching 💕 xx

hey all!

Thanks for all the love! I was very presently surprised.

To be fair @KittyKatSmile - I thought you were going to update us with news of Tiny Dancer's first dance!! I think I remember some of your advice, 30g of protein sticks in my head for some reason.

In other news as I don't have any baby stuff to add, the puppy is starting to really show her true abilities as a gun dog so hopefully, I'll be able to start getting her to pass her certification and if I do, she'll have a litter of puppies next year :)
Oh and I am enjoying the fact that I can now shop, well, its a little on hold as I'm hoping to get back to a size 12 so currently on day 8 of the diet and I have lost a few pounds in my first week.

@KittyKatSmile oh my days...Thursday...THURSDAY!!! Eek I love how you are doing everything you can to secure the leap year baby! I am so excited for you - please please keep us as updated as you can! What a feeling you must have to be on maternity leave. And all that knitting...you crazy girl!!!

@Lalla525 Congratulations! I'm at a similar stage to you. Those movements are sooo beautiful aren't they? I actually paid for a private scan after the 12 week one as our baby was in a terrible position and we did the water, coughing, laughing etc and nothing worked. Anxiety eased massively after that. Similar thing happened at 20 week scan and we have to go back as they couldn't perform all of the checks but of the ones they could do they were happy with. Too many scans aren't going to cause a problem. Are you getting growth scans too?

@Welshpugmomma I haven't read too much about birth yet but apparently at the NCT classes here they recommend you stay home as long as possible as you will feel more comfortable. You sound like you are pretty clued up with everything though! Thank you for the words on movements, I've been told they follow patterns too although I'm yet to work them out for our baby. I'm enjoying this part of pregnancy - I feel better after a week off work!! The last 2 months seem to have flown past for me...I can't believe I'm 5 months! Has it gone quick for you too or did time drag after a certain point? I'm expecting the 20-30 week mark to slow down. We need it to as we still haven't bought anything yet, just more made notes of the things we will buy!

@Ginandtonic31 I am glad the fluid has gone and things are settling down. I do hope you are doing as well as you can be though all things considering and your husband is too. Are you still at work? I remember you saying you were going to try and go until quite late. I hope it's not too tough. Also, if you do have a water birth, please let me know how that is...I am contemplating that.

@Cauliflower82 I love to read your updates, I am so glad all is calm with you. A day cuddling your dog sounds just lovely. You mentioned you wrote a private blog when doing the IVF, do you think you will do another for parenting? My husband got me a pregnancy diary for Christmas and at first I wrote in it religiously but I haven't for a while...I must add to it before the weeks fly by!

@Mrbay I am glad things are okay and there is a clear plan. Also well done on the first few pounds of weight loss. Are you following slimming world? I love the slimming world chips!!

@Zest11 I think it has all gone fast and at nearly 38 weeks I don't have everything either 😂 I collected her pram Saturday. Her nursery is getting there but not finished. Also my baby doesn't have any movement pattern at all and never has! Yes I'm still at work. I finish Friday which will be 38+2. Unfortunately Monday is the funeral but then I've a week of lunches, cleaning and beauty appointments so I need her to stay put!

@Mrbay tried to send you this privately but apparently I'm not allowed to send attachments there so everyone can read my nutrition plan and have my handwriting analysed to prove I'm a psychopath....!

@mrbay I’m glad to hear your little puppy is doing so well :). It’s funny that a lot of us do appear to be dog people - I’m so in love with my fur ball too 💕.

@Zest11 I have one of those pregnancy diaries too. With this one you add a photo for each week too - I’m notorious for forgetting to take pictures so a lot of the weeks are just pictures of my dog 😂. No, I don’t think I am going to write anything on parenting - I’ve bought so many parenting books and don’t really like any of them. I think I have too much to learn to share any knowledge with others, unless it’s a learn as you go blog which now I’m kind of liking the sound of. A new project possibly. Have you broken the news to your students this week?

I have news. Induction for me is late next week 😬. I’ve read up so much on inductions and I’m sick of second guessing myself, so thankfully the consultant was quite helpful today in making me feel semi confident with this. I haven’t really told anyone as a couple of people in my circle appear to be just as opinionated about this as they are about breastfeeding, so I might be keeping it under wraps. I’m very anxious and also I’m just in awe that soon I get to meet Pip 💕.

Good luck tomorrow @KittyKatSmile

Also, I’m trying colostrum harvesting. Anyone else? I’m useless at it 😂

Oooo @Cauliflower82 that's exciting stuff! I'm sure it'll all be fine, I know the whole induction thing scares a lot of people so they build a wall up against it - you will be fine :) and so exciting to have a date though!

My husband has sailed ...he's bound for NY I'm so excited, Baba just has to hold on for 10 days now ;)
Went for my appt now he said likely baby will be in the 9lb bracket will have a scan next Tues and go from there he did warn me to go with an open mind, c section deffo on the cards not sure how a 9lber vaginal sounds to me right now anyway... I told him I'd like to wait til dh was back but obv understand baby has its own time frame he just warned me it may turn into an urgent c section in that case... Let's wait til Tuesday sounds like that'll be real decision time!
I wrote such a long message yesterday and then lost the tab it's frustrating they don't have like auto draft on MN !

Colostrum harvesting ? Haven't read much I dont think- only that people do it if they suspect baby / mum will be poorly at birth is that right haha ?

The ONE benefit Ive received being in USA is that my health insurance covered the cost of an electric pump so I have an all singing dancing pump , I probably wouldn't even consider one if I had been home especially not such an expensive one! But will deffo try to use it to make things easier!

Hope you're all well :)