BFP after IVF: nervous ladies needed a handhold Part II

[gingergnome]

Hi everyone,

Think that the last thread for this topic reached its limit, so have started a new one.

Good luck to everyone who has finally got that longed for BFP!

This is a place for everything that comes after the 2WW: celebrating milestones, being (cautiously!) excited, symptom checking, worrying, sharing advice, commiserating bad news, generally keeping each other going, and willing each other along on our way to the 12 week mark.

A bit about me: 39 y/old, 0 DC, IVF ICSI cycle 1, first BFP since TTC, currently 6+0.

Look forward to meeting lots of people with new BFPs and sharing your journey!

Tagging in some ladies from the old thread,
@itonlytakesone
@TheArtfulScreamer
@cannonball8726

Hi ladies
Baby Anya is here! She made her appearance 5 weeks early! I had a feeling! She's doing well and I'm struggling to sit 😛 but we are fine. They're keeping her in neonatal to monitor her for a few days as she's semi premi but she's doing great. ❤️

@HJ82 OMG congratulations!!! Glad the little one doing OK. How come you're struggling to sit? Is it because of tear? Try to express some colostrum if you haven't done so - the midwives or neonatal nurses can show you how!

@beherenow32 how are you feeling?

@cannonball8726 yes, I got to the very last bit and her heart rate dropped and since she was 35weeks they whizzed me to theatre and took her out with forceps. It was all so fast and I'm pretty sore now!! 😣 trying to get some sleep before I express colostrum.

@HJ82

Congratulations! I had the same experience having my baby only 9 weeks ago, i got to the last minute but both our heart rates increased too much... so forceps it was i completely know what your going through. I used lots of simple wipes to keep me feeling ok down below. 5 weeks early aww what a shock and such a gorgeous name!

@BeHereNowx32
Hope you're ok x

Congratulations @HJ82 hope Anya is doing ok in neo. I know you're keen to breastfeed so I hope the hospital offers you good support as it can sometimes be difficult to establish with pre terms, my god daughter was 4 weeks early and didn't have the swallowing reflex so my friend ended up going straight to formula, but in fairness she was never overly committed to breastfeeding.
I've no experience on the soreness with having an EMCS but I've heard good things about maternity pads sprayed with witch hazel and put in the fridge.

@HJ82 congrats. So happy for you. Take it as easy as you can to recover. Enjoy your time breastfeeding when you’re both able to.

@Itonlytakesone @cannonball8726 thank you. Still been quite low and anxious but going to speak to health visiter. Also going to try get out the house more. Baby is doing fab though which is what matters.

Everyone else doing ok? Xx

Thanks everyone. I'm doing fine, just bruised from forceps nothing too crazy. Her sucking reflex will be fine in a week ❤️ it's just frustrating to watch her and not hold her. Even though she's pretty big already at 5lb.4 and 45cms! But two weeks before term they still have to do the incubator to monitor her. Threw my birth plan out last night lol. Ah babies hey. She was keen so see us early.

@hj82 and @itonlytakesone I had forceps too. Make sure you are on top of pain relief @HJ82. I found that the discomfort was much better after a week.

It is really hard not to be able to hold them - my baby was in an incubator in the neonatal unit too. It definitely affected my milk supply. But five weeks on I'm almost completely breastfeeding so don't worry if you're not able to start straight away.

@beherenow32 definitely mention to health visitor. Yep getting the house helps - as does napping!

@cannonball8726 thank you. May ask about feeding too. How are you achieving your breastfeeding. Are you literally feeding as much as possible? I felt like I was but baby gets frustrated. I give her a bottle after feeding on me, and she is taking more and more formula. Just drank 6oz and I feel stupid because I’m leaking milk! 😐 I will be out all day so, likely to use bottles again. Argh! This is what is affecting my mental health I think. Wanting to breastfeed but finding it difficult.
I am so, so glad that things are going well for you xx

@HJ82 how are you and Anya doing?
I’m going to be less soon and gloom on the thread 🤗
Breastfeeding is going well at night/ first morning feed. Which is great because I can do it all from bed! Speaking to the health visiter today. Xx

@BeHereNowx32 I'm leaving hospital tomorrow but she will stay a bit more. Best they make sure she's 100% ready to come home. She's really strong but has had a few episodes of apnea so they want to be sure that's sorted before she leaves. Obviously. It's common for premies and at 35 weeks it shouldn't take long for that to work itself out. She bounces back and they've never had to give her air. But it's still terrifying me. I'm getting skin to skin and I'll be here all day everyday- just home to sleep. I'm expressing colostrum and giving to her in the mouth. I put her on the boob today and she started sucking right away. It wasn't the real deal but at least her reflexes work. She's been tube fed for the last 48hrs. We will work on breast tomorrow 🙂 hopefully my milk will come through soon. I hate leaving her down there but it's what's best. She came to soon little munchkin. 😔 but she's doing great ❤️

@HJ82 aw. I’m glad Anya is doing well. What a shame, you will miss being away from her! I hope it isn’t for long, but you’re right they need to make sure everything is ok. And lovely that you’re getting that close skin on skin time 💗

Glad to hear Anya is doing well and hopefully she'll soon be home with you and at least you might get a couple of full nights sleep to help you recover from the birth before she comes home.
Behere how did you get on with the health visitor?

Hi ladies, just popping in to update you all and saw the lovely news from @HJ82 - congratulations! I'm so happy for you both and glad baby Anya is doing well. Xxx

I also have news! At 5.30 on Tuesday morning my twins were delivered by emergency c section after a low lying placenta which had not been picked up on the ultrasounds abrupted. Thank god I had been kept in hospital over night as its had a steroid injection latein the evening before, and they were monitoring my platelets count - if I had been at home when this happened none of us would now be here to tell the tale! As it was I lost 4.5 litres of blood and had a very traumatic crash team journey from Matrernity to theatre, and 4 hours of emergency surgery with a team of 18 specialists later we came out the other side and are now recovering in hospital.

It was so worth it - babies Erin (4lb 14) and Finley (5oz) are perfect - both in incubators in special care as almost 6 weeks early but they are both doing great!

@HJ82 our babies have the same birthdays 😊❤️

@CritterTamers congrats! So scary! You and your baby have been through a lot already! Hope you’re all doing ok. Bet they’re adorable and teeny!

@TheArtfulScreamer1 she suggested I go to a mother baby group that’s linked with our doctors. I went yesterday and it was actually really good. Have you been to one?
I swapped numbers with another mum who was at my ante natal class.
Need to speak to her again today. Hoping to borrow electric pump and think I’ll ask for breastfeeding support.

How are getting on? @TheArtfulScreamer1

@CritterTamer

Wow congratulations well done that's so scary I'm so glad all 3 of you are ok! Beautiful babies aww it was meant to be little fighters that's quite a dramatic entrance to the world! Thank you for taking the time out to update us all on here your babies are still so brand new.

My baby had her injections yesterday she's doing ok since, they told me to give her calpol for 2 days so she's been snoozing a lot but is still in her normal routine at the moment.

Top tip by the nurse yesterday to put the calpol into a spare teat on its own and let her drink it herself before a feed it's working a treat, you just sort of squeeze it until she sucks it all out she drinks all of it doesn't spit any out now.

@BeHereNowx32

Glad you are getting on better now, Iv been to a mother baby group once it was a sort of welcome your new baby one there was a couple of new mums there and I'm going to baby mindful class in June for 5 weeks.

@HJ82
Enjoy taking your new baby Anya home is it today? Take lots of pictures i took so many (I thought too many but i don't regret any!) they only stay that small for such a short time! 😢. My daughter is 10 weeks old tomorrow wow!

@cannonball8726

Oh no you had the forceps too? It's quite painful although I've forgotten about it now at the time I just couldn't sit down, stand too long or lie down anything 😂 how old is your baby? Iv lost track i can't believe we've all been on this thread so long! All the way through it's nice to keep in touch and see you're not the only one going through things xx

@CritterTamer that was meant to say babies 👶 👶

Congratulations critter on the birth if your twins and what a dramatic entrance into the world but pleased it all worked out in the end although I bet it was bloody scary at the time.
Behere I've not been to a mother and baby group yet but a cousin of my husband's has sent me details of some groups nearby so I'm going to get myself to some of them. We've had a lovely walk out with the pram today and yesterday, I'm lucky enough to live in the countryside so there's plenty of nice walks locally. How are Sofias feeding cues, I feel like Florences where really obvious as a newborn but these days I never can tell and I'm second guessing by time and shoving my finger or sometimes just my nipple in her mouth.

@TheArtfulScreamer1 aw. Lovely. I can’t wait to get my confidence up and go out more with the buggy. Being in the country sounds so lovely.
Sofia is the same really. She just goes straight to crying sometimes. 🙄 if you stroke her cheek she does the rooting action and she sucks her hands. But I dont think they are an indication on her hunger, just discovering what she can do.
How often is Florence feeding? Sofia is definitely less often, and a lot less formula today. She must be getting more from me (yay 😊). I have a breast pump too, so will try pump when she bottle feeds and see how that goes.

That’s good you are going to try groups. Let us know how you get on. Think I will try a different one with a friend next week xx

She feeds on average every 3 hours with a bit of cluster feeding in a morning and on a tea time. I feed her myself all the time apart from a 5oz formula bottle around 9pm which DH usually gives. I also try and express a bit in a morning as I like to have a few ounces in the fridge incase she needs a tea time top up, DH is taking her somewhere or I'm going somewhere I wouldn't feel confident flashing my boobs. I am getting alot more confident about feeding in public though. I've managed to freeze a few feeds aswell as my mum is babysitting at the end of the month whilst we go to my friends 40th. I've been taking fenugreek and whilst I'm sure it's placebo effect I've felt abit more confident about my supply. A couple of weeks ago I was ready to give up breastfeeding but now I'm happy to continue for the time being.

@TheArtfulScreamer1 sounds like you’re doing fab. I did read about that supplement. Might try.
Sofia has only really been drinking 1oz of formula here and there today. And one 5oz bottle. I tried the pump and my boobs were literally empty at that point. (She fed from me too). So, may need to build up my supply of that’s what I want to do. A better day though.
Xx

@TheArtfulScreamer1 do your boobs always feel empty now, or do they fill up? Mines always feel empty during the day, but get engorged at night. And Sofia feeds better at night. Probably because I’ve been too lazy to get up and make a bottle then, so my supply is more 🙈 xx

It's hard to tell with the empty / full thing sometimes they'll feel hard and I'll know that I need to feed or express and sometimes just before a feed I'll get this weird sensation like my internal tap into my boobs has been turned on for a few seconds to fill them and then other times they'll feel perfectly fine and I'll worry they are empty but then she'll guzzle away. The human body really is a marvel.

@TheArtfulScreamer1 I wish I knew a bit more about how it all worked!
I’m going to phone the doctors next week. My mood is getting worse- constantly wanting to cry. I’m not eating or sleeping properly and don’t want this to get worse. Just want to be a good mummy! Xx