BFP after IVF: nervous ladies needed a handhold Part II

[gingergnome]

Hi everyone,

Think that the last thread for this topic reached its limit, so have started a new one.

Good luck to everyone who has finally got that longed for BFP!

This is a place for everything that comes after the 2WW: celebrating milestones, being (cautiously!) excited, symptom checking, worrying, sharing advice, commiserating bad news, generally keeping each other going, and willing each other along on our way to the 12 week mark.

A bit about me: 39 y/old, 0 DC, IVF ICSI cycle 1, first BFP since TTC, currently 6+0.

Look forward to meeting lots of people with new BFPs and sharing your journey!

Tagging in some ladies from the old thread,
@itonlytakesone
@TheArtfulScreamer
@cannonball8726

@CritterTamer thanks!! I'm gonna try and cheapskate most stuff 🙂 since the baby grows so fast all my friends have said to just get clothes from other mates. So I'll try that first. I might splash out on some nice things tho, but not basics.

How's everyone's experiences with midwives? I had an apt today and tbh it was pointless- she just took my blood pressure (could have done that myself) and fobbed off any questions I had about the palpitations and wouldn't listen to heartbeat, even at 17+4😕 the first apt was basic too. Anyway, it's the nhs. I don't expect the world of care and attention - shame really as it should be understandably a nervous time for expecting mums. I hope they're supportive in labour! 😳

@HJ82 My first 2 midwife apps were useless too. They were running late at the end of the day both times and clearly couldn't be bothered. Thru competely messed up booking my 12 week scan so it was booked for 16 weeks so I had to kick up a fuss with the hospital to get it changed. In the end they brought it forward to 14.5 weeks as that was the only slot they had so I was not able to be offered screening tests as yoo late.

Once I got to the hospital for the scan the mideives there were fantastic - did a really thorough job and tested everything (had nothing except blood pressure tested by the community midwives). It was a totally different experience. I then had a 16 week appt with the community mideives which was useless once again. She did eventually put the doppler on and find the heartbeats but only because I made a fuss asking for it. I'm quite glad I'm going yo consultant led to be honest, found the community midwife team utterly useless do far. But those in the hospital were very good.

Sorry about all the typos - I'm still really not well and struggling with tablet screen lol.

@CritterTamer community midwife? I'm only going to the hospital ones. My friend is a midwife and I've not told her yet. I'm gonna go to her for check ups 😂

I guess it's done differently in Wales then - all mudwife care is done by a community team (they work 1 day per week in doctors surgery and do most visits at your home). Only get to see the hospital midwives when you go in for a scan and (presumably) during labour.

@HJ82 that’s shame about your midwife app. I’ve been so lucky, and have the nicest midwife, and listened to the heartbeat from 22 weeks ( a lot of places don’t do it early due to not finding it?!? I got to listen at 16 weeks on a private scan). They will check your iron with the blood test hopefully.

@CritterTamer you sounds so organised 😊 nice to get bargains in the sale. I was wondering whether to start picking up the little bits like Muslins and nappies... xx

@crittertamer wow that is a serious level of organisation! You were made to be a mummy of twins with those prep skills! Sorry to hear you've been sick- hope you get well soon and get a bit of respite from feeling awful - you have been through the mill!

@beherenow32 how many weeks until mat leave for you? Sorry to hear you have felt pretty crappy. I can't believe how close you are now to meeting baby!

@HJ82 that sounds like a lovely reveal. How sweet of your mum! Jealous of your recent sun exposure! Will you be travelling back to Oz when baby born or are your family coming to the UK?

We have yet to buy anything still! Although friends are basically lending us most things so we are lucky. Our sole big purchase will be the pram (still torn between bugaboo bee 5 and babyzen yoyo!). I went on a nursery visit this morning - isn't that absolutely crazy?! The waiting lists are really long in our area!

@cannonball8726 I have 5 weeks left (very tempted to go earlier...) but this week did go fast. I feel like baby is growing by the hour! Lol

Wow! that’s crazy about visiting nurseries already, but exciting too 😊 I love all this parent to be stuff, like going to the ante natal classes etc.
Xx

I've just spent over a £100 in Aldi but my trolley was over flowing and I've got all sorts. We're hoping to get the cot at the end of the month to so we are getting their bit by bit.
My midwife has been great she listened to the heartbeat from 16 weeks and always has time for a chat. I do love the NHS as it's responsible for me being in this position but sometimes the level of care varies so much from area to area.
We had our 1 and only antenatal class on Tue and a tour of the labour ward which was interesting although I did find it a bit grim when we were told if you want a water birth you've got to take your own sieve in with you.
Glad everyone seems to be bobbing along ok and doing well in the most part. I've only got 6 weeks left at work, time just seems to be running away.

@TheArtfulScreamer it really is so different! I have 4 antenatal classes, but they don’t do a tour of the hospital ( you can look online and see...)I looked online at Aldi baby stuff and didn’t see anything. I definitely need to look again. X

Oh when is everyone planning on starting to pack their hospital bag? I was considering 36 weeks when Mat leave starts x

We are lucky we get to have midwife apt's 🙂 I should complain. Mum said they didn't even have scans back then, you just did a preg test then rocked up at the hospital in labour. So I guess I should complain!! ❤️

*shouldn't lol

@HJ82 I do think it is important to have a good relationship with the midwife. Especially in times of worry. But see now you get on later. I think they can still have a relaxed approach until you’re in 3rd trimester... xx

@Beherenow32 yeah it would be good if you got the same one thru the pregnancy. 🙂 I just get a bit annoyed at medical staff when you ask questions as they side eye you. 😂

Ok - anyone getting leg pain in the night? Do compression stockings help? Sleep positions? Acupuncture? Massage? I've not been exercising since holiday but my goodness I keep making up with throbbing pain in legs, not cramping just aching! Anyone had this yet?

Does anyone have a special pillow? I've looked but like everything with this, too many options and can't pick!

@TheArtfulScreamer I won't to Aldi and they only had food. 🤔

@cannonball8726 I'm gonna go back for 2 months of my mat leave 😀

@cannonball8726 good point re nursery 😬 it's so hard in London!

@HJ82 yes I’ve had major back and leg pain. Really bad, and bad cramps. I just got a pregnancy pillow, which is helping. I got one of the really big u shaped pillows. My bump and back is supported and the pillow goes in between my legs. I tried using just normal pillows, but this is a lot comfier. (Still get a little back pain). You can try stretches. X

@HJ82 I read that aching legs can be another sign of anemia. Maybe you should get blood test from GP?

@Beherenow32 thanks! It's only started this week. I started taking floradix again. Midwife said no to blood tests as doesn't think I could be suffering from low iron. I've not bee eating amazing in aus so there's a possibility I'm low. I'll continue with the supps for now. I probably should sort out my gp situation 😂

@hj82 and @beherenow32 I bought a dreamgenii pillow in the Mothercare sale! Not 100% sure about it yet - it has great reviews but with me, my main problem is upper back and shoulder pain because of my bigger boobs - and I've noticed that i get the pain at night because I'm not wearing a bra. Going to go back to Bravissimo tomorrow (second time during this pregnancy) and invest in a comfortable sleep bra! I really didn't see the point of these before but the discomfort is pretty crappy. Luckily yoga postures help - but only temporarily! Also @hj82 you posted in early hours - are you jetlagged or just partying hard and making most of pre baby freedom? ;) yes the nursery waits in London are just crazy! The one I saw on Friday wouldn't be our first choice (two others have more convenient location but their lists are longer) but all other things were good so i think we will put our names down for this one and hope a place is available there before better located one comes up! It is crazy though - there is non- refundable deposit of £50 to get on list!

@beherenow32 5 weeks - that's so close! Will you be 37 weeks when you go off? Hope you feel like you can hang on for a bit longer so you have more time with baby after - but don't push yourself too much!

@theartfulscreamer- what did you get from Aldi? Going today - have very little idea of what we will need to buy!!! We have made a list based on stuff we have seen online but still feeling pretty clueless!

@HJ82 that's really annoying that your midwife wouldn't do any bloods! You might be anaemic - esp given that you are vegan! It sounds like you make an effort to make sure you're not nutritionally deficient from previous posts - but iron requirements go up in pregnancy. Def go to see the GP about the palpitations - get your thyroid function and haemoglobin checked. It is hopefully nothing (pregnant women have physiological changes to cardiovascular system which is totally normal and hopefully why you are getting the symptoms!)

(And iron checked too i meant to say!)

@cannonball8726 combo of jet lag (still) and leg aching. Gonna get a bio magnesium drink - my friend swears by it for pregnancy leg pain. I put dvt socks on and went back to sleep, so they did help! Gonna wear constantly now lol! At least they will stop any varicose veins from forming!!

Re the bloods, because my last tests were all normal at 9 weeks she said no. She asked me why I had everything checked and I told her about being vegan - usually I use that angle to get bloods as drs think you'll die if you don't drink animals milk etc lol. So they always test. I'm always normal. She shrugged and said she didn't think it was necessary. I def don't feel anaemic.

I don't know about the nursery thing. I probably won't send kid till 3years old so not sure where I'll be then, might be pointless to go on waitlist. I did see that you can get £ from gov to help pay for childcare? I thought they didn't help if you both worked full time etc. I wasn't planning on doing childcare, only child minder, but if they give us help then maybe nursery that offer placement earlier then 3 could be helpful. Is that what you're doing? Earlier then 3? Some nurseries only start at 3 is all.

My haul from the centre aisles of doom at Aldi includes muslins, bibs, dummys, vests, big box of wipes, nappies, bedding set, cotbed sheets, nappy bin, changing mat. Basically I just shoved a bit of everything in there was a baby healthcare kit that I'd seen in the book but they didn't have that in. Most of the smaller stuff was priced at £2.99 / £3.99 so I figured even if I don't use it it's not the end of the world. I also treated myself to an Aberdeen Angus rib eye steak to improve my iron levels, I had it for tea last night and it was epic my steak knife sliced through it like butter.