IVF/ICSI June/ July 2018 (Part 2)

[Tigerlily99]

Hello ladies, I think we reached the maximum no of posts on last thread so I opened a new one. Hope you are Ok with this OP (@cannonball)? X

@maiarindell- congrats!! Have a lovely time in Greece

@HJ82- Glad to hear you are thinking of nice things to do. Hope you are able to take a bit of time away from all this craziness with it’s highs and lows and I wish you luck with whatever you decide to do next. If you do cycle again then I hope it’s your luck go! X

@cannonball8726- good luck for tomorrow!!
My OTD if Fri... I think I’m the last on this thread to test 😱

I tested (couldn't hold out) and it's BFP. I've been getting a pulling sensation in my lower abdomen for past two days but really didn't want to get my hopes up. I feel really grateful and lucky as this was our first cycle and I didn't think it would work first time. I'm really sorry today hasn't brought better news for you @HJ82. You seem like a super awesome and positive person. That is a good way to be. I really hope things work out.

Good luck, @tigerlily99. You are the last person to test :) will be looking out for your result xxx

Congrats @cannonball8726 ☺️ X

Thank you @beherenow32 nice to hear from you. How are you getting on?

@cannonball8726 doing ok, thanks. Sick and tired, but just being lazy when I can ☺️
Been chatting on the BFP thread, if you feel like you want to join.
So happy for you! Xx

@cannonball8726 Congratulations-that is brilliant news! You’ve done well to hold out this long! Are you going to test again tomorrow? I’ve got to do tomorrow and then phone to book in first scan 😬
@tigerlily99 Friday will come around quickly for you I’m sure, hope you’re managing to keep busy 😀

@beherenow32 good on you for being lazy ;) how many weeks are you now? Thanks - will check out BFP group! Although feeling like it's very early.

@maiarindell1 yes will test again tomorrow! Will then call clinic and arrange bloods (hCG and progesterone). Running out of meds too. Hope you're having fun in Greece :)

@HJ82 I hope you are doing okay, my love xxx

@beherenow32 I’m 8 weeks +2 days. That’s understandable. Think I waited a little bit too.

@cannonball8726 wow!! Amazing!!! So happy for you. All the best! And thank you.
My BF isn't ready to give up. He doesn't think this is the end of our story. I felt like this was my last effort in this race. I'm 37 in may and I really didn't think I'd want to be having a baby after that. I know many women do and you never know but I always said 36 was my cut off. Things just didn't go to that plan. I can't beat myself up for not trying in my 20s either!

Anyone know when you go back to normal after failed ivf? I feel like this process can steal 2-4 months of natural trying time ☹️

Wishing you all the best! And @Tigerlily99 I hope you get your Bfp too!

@Maiarindell1 Thanks dear, I'll do a couple of other tests to be sure before I stop drugs. So many stories online of women who do ivf get a negative HPT then have a beta and they are actually pregnant. Scary to think of that. And that we don't have the option of blood test!! But I'm sure the tests are accurate and I'm not pregnant. First time I did a test tho so it's nerve wracking.

@HJ82- I’d still consider 36/37 to be very young. I’m knocking on the door of 40 now and I’m still trying for baby no 1! Wanted to have my family complete by age 25 when I was younger. Sometimes life doesnt work out quite how you were expecting. So I’d not let age alone put you off- 40 is the new 30! Hopefully your cycles will go back to normal soon so you can get on with TTC naturally while thinking things over. Took me 2 cycles to re-regulate. X

@Cannonball8726- a massive congrats to you!! Hurrah!

Feels a bit lonely now I’m the last one to test! X

@Tigerlily99 sending you loads of luck! Have you been trying since you were in your 20s? It's such a blow! I know someone that's done ivf 8 times and she's my age. It's heartbreaking. We could never afford a round of ivf! It costs 15k right?!! How do people pay for this? Unless you're very wealthy. Working and living in London doesn't leave much in the bank! So sad it's not more affordable. It's a blessing to have the NHS offer me two fresh rounds.

@HJ82- I didn’t meet my DH until my late 20s and he wasn’t ready to TTC until early 30s so we haven’t been trying for quite as long as that. Actually spent a long time TTC naturally beforehand and didn’t quite realise just how much time had passed before finally went to the GP. We have been under NHS too and am really grateful we had the opportunity for the treatment- had 1 fresh and 1 frozen cycle covered by the CCG. We are probably quite lucky we managed to squeeze in before the age 40 cut off. In hindsight should have been checked up a lot earlier, I think I was in denial for a while something was not right as everyone else around us seemed to be getting pregnant with ease. But best not to dwell on these things as can’t turn back time and we had some good times in our 20s and 30s. I don’t think that private IVF costs quite as much as £15k as standard, unless you go somewhere like ARGC which can cost in excess of £20k if you are having stuff like humira. Depends on what regimen of treatment you are on and I think you can shop around for cheaper drug prices if getting privately- I’ve heard of a few people getting from places like Asda. Think it can be

@Tigerlily99 I think some people can become obsessed in this, I totally understand to longing etc. Im not sure I'd want to put my body through rounds and rounds of it. I'm totally open for adopting if it doesn't happen for us also. If we feel we must have a family as we grow old. I've not looked into that process to much but If I could help to change and make a child's life better and give them the love they need, then why not. With 150k debt how does one find the money to raise the baby they finally have?! I'll watch the show, sounds interesting. It was my first round. I feel very sad for my Partner. He's only 30 and is incredible with kids. I'd be heartbroken if he couldn't raise one. I wouldn't be super concerned about my age if my AMH and FSH hadn't halved / doubled in the last 12 months! I think the prices I'm seeing for private ivf that around around 3-5k don't include the drugs right? Anyway, not looking there just yet!! Keeping positive ❤️ hope you're feeling ok!

Sounds like you have a great constructive attitude towards this and it’s great that you still have another cycle left should you choose to use it. Ive been told that the first cycle is almost a bit like an experiment to see what works and what needs tweaking. Also, my understanding is that FSH and sometimes AMH can fluctuate so while they can give an indication of fertility, they are not an absolute marker. Totally get where you are coming from with this process eating into natural TTC. I think we’ve barely had a cycle here and there since we started this bandwagon back in Oct. Have had procedure after procedure where TTC was a no no plus methotrexate for a possible ectopic which took 3 months out. At any rate, enjoy your time away from all this medical intervention 😁

I feel ok, just want to know either way now. Had some cramping and lower back pain which felt like AF pains today. I know there’s no way to tell if it is anything but it’s depressing nonetheless. Too many things to make you anxious. I wonder what it must be like to get pregnant the normal way- must be bliss compared to this 😂

Sorry forgot to add @HJ82

Sorry have been off the boards for a bit and lots happened as usual. @Tigerlily99 I actually did my transfer yesterday so only testing next Friday 17th August so while away. So you are not the last one here.. All the progesterone just makes me tired and hard to keep up with the deadlines at work.
Congrats @cannonball8726 and @Maiarindell1
@HJ82 sorry about this round and some really insightful discussion. If it doesnt work out for me this round, I think I will definitely take a couple of months off and reassess.

Hi all, we went private, it’s around £5K including drugs.. was probably close to £6k for us with additional stuff (blood tests, etc). NHS won’t cover us because I don’t have UK passport. We only got 1 embryo out of this cycle and now have to find more money (that we don’t have as just got our first house in mortgage in preparation of new family) for another attempt.. this is really draining .. all the money spent won’t guarantee success either.. the problem is on DH side who is a British citizen and that just kills me that I have to go over this while being healthy myself. I know it’s not his fault but he won’t even give up smoking while I’m running around all my relatives to borrow more money. On the other hand we are lucky being in the UK, the price tag in the US is even more dreadful... sorry for the moan, I know you ladies get this...

Oh yeah.. it’s then about £1200 per FET if you are lucky to have frozen embryos! So not too bad I guess...

@viletta where do you go privately. Is there web resource that helps with making the choice. The price is very variable isn't it.

@tikha, congrats on the transfer! this is our last NHS round so if it doesn’t work, we will be onto private. There’s the HFEA website which gives you stats on success rates in different brackets eg ICSI vs IVF, diff age groups and fresh vs frozen. I think it’s useful to look at but I’d be wary of just following the stats as some clinics are quite selective about who they will take on and also the smaller clinics will have smaller numbers of women cycling >> so when you break it down- the stats are not so readily directly comparable. I’d say it’s worth searching for recent reviews of people who have cycled at individual clinics you may be considering to see what their feedback is on how communicative they are etc.. Prob worth going to open days if they have them as you can attend Q&A for free and get a feel if clinic is a fit. I have done all the above apart from the open day bit as I’ve realised our NHS clinic are actually quite decent judging by some of the experiences some people have documented on their forums. So will stay with them privately. Plus they are so close to us it means I can continue to work without significant disruption. X
@viletta- the prices you mention are quite good compared to what I’ve been quoted in London! But who honestly has a few spare k sitting around! Good luck with raising funds for your second cycle. X

@tikha and @Tigerlily99 heya, I go to London Women’s clinic but not the one that’s in London. I am happy with them so far, great staff, very supportive. I don’t remember which site I used to choose them, I choose them as they have a variety of treatments available and also quite good success rates comparing to others.

They also have an option to apply for insurance, that will give your money back if no baby after 3 cycles. I think the package is around £10K not sure if this includes meds

Useful information. Thanks for the info @Tigerlily99 @Viletta. The 2 week wait is crazy but somewhere everything passes. Good time for reflection though.. @Tigerlily99 what you said about time really resonates.. Both me and DH weren't ready to settle down in 20s.. lost touch got back together, then family issues meant too much chaos until we didnt realise that we had a problem and left it to so late. I am not sure there is any easy solution.

@Tigerlily99 good luck tomorrow ❤️