Thread 32 | TTC#1 | Making the move from conception to infertility. We've taken some blows but we are not beaten

[Jamon]

Hi all. We're a group of first timers who've been plugging away on the conception boards for some time. The support here is amazing so if you're in a similar boat please jump onboard.

Time to hand hold through treatments and support each other through to becoming the mums we deserve to be 💪🏼🌸🙏🏼

Just how instructive is the video Kwick? Don't want to be surprised when I youtube it and get a full frontal fanjo steaming demonstration!

Does anyone else do yoga? Are there any good poses for fertility/bad poses?

Had a dream last night I had a baby, it felt so realistic, but as always in my baby dreams, I couldn't feed the baby! I tried everything but I was all on my own and kept forgetting to do it, and then when I tried nothing would happen. Not sure what that says about my future parenting ability!

I'm 4 dpo into my second normal cycle in nearly 18 months! I thought the agnus castus was making a mess, but it turns out it was just clearing it up! Even HS the other day, post-ovulation, and all clear.

Hey all :)
I haven't been on this for a few days and saw the conversation about vaginal and fanjo steaming - i'm not sure I'm ready to start my day with a youtube video on that, and I'm also not sure it's the best thing to search for at work!
I am having my scratch next week. Is anyone else having one/had one? I've heard it's like a smear test, and you feel fine afterwards? Is that true? Or do I need to be braced for it to be awful?!
I pick up my drugs the same day so it all starts next week... it feels very real now...

Sounds like a friendship to let go of chlo

Plane if I were you I’d get him on the Proxeed asap

Sorry winging

Jene it doesn’t seem too much to ask does it?

Welcome back struggle sounds like you had a lovely holiday and are in a good place to start treatment

Flash really positive the agnus is helping

Hi rose. I've had it once and having it again in November for my FET. I found it fine. I mean yes it's uncomfortable when they do it but it's like a rough unpleasant feeling for approx 2-3 seconds and then gone immediately. It's definitely a case of grin and bear it for the good of the cycle. Don't worry about it at all. Good luck!

Thanks geeup that's good to hear :) I hope your FET goes well in November :) x

😂 karcher! Clean as a whistle!! A fanny you could eat your dinner off! 😂

First appointment sorted-not for 4 weeks though as we can't get one before we go on holiday.....

Going to suggest this to my oh jam thanks!!

💐 winging I'm cd 2 ttc for 14 months now... I don't know about you but I'm a bit numb to it all now, think it's how I cope. I remember being 5 months in and crying when my period arrived.....

rose what's a scratch?! I'm relatively new to the infertility lingo!

gee good luck for November!! 🤞

Hello planegazer :)

I'm glad i'm not the only who struggles with the lingo! I have to google 75% of the acronyms used! :)

I didn't know what a scratch was either until recently. The scratch is literally a scratch to the lining of the uterus. It irritates the lining and makes it thicker. The theory is scratching the lining makes the body release hormones and chemicals to repair it and this helps the body to implant the embryo, and gives a better chance of pregnancy.

It has only been used for a few years, and the findings are positive. It is now being tested in a clinical trial. My clinic is taking part of the trial and allocates women to either receive it or not.

I was allocated into the treatment group to the scratch. I took it up as it seems like a simple way to try and increase your success chances!

My clinic offers it privately - I think it costs about £150. Maybe ask your clinic if they offer it, and if they think it'll help you? x

Ok ladies I'm going to get a bit tmi here.
Cycle started yesterday afternoon and as I often have heavy flow after a short cycle I went straight onto mega super tampax. I woke up about 4am with damp knickers and immediately panicked and ran to bathroom. However I hadn't leaked blood but knickers were wet with clear fluid (tampon was full with fresh blood but not overflowing). Same thing has happened at work this morning.
Anyone else get this? It has happened to me on occasion before as a one off but not as much as this before. Just confused at where the fluid is coming from during a pretty heavy blood flow.
I have also had constant cramps since yesterday which is slightly out of the ordinary for me.

I often notice clear cervical fluid during AF winigng although only since using a mooncup, as I think the tampons used to dry it up for me.

Sorry AF is being weird for you though.

Ah thanks rose that makes sense! Thanks so much for the detail!! Appreciate it! Really hope it helps your wee bean stick for you! 😊

wing I get the same as overina maybe that's it? 🤔

Gah - I keep falling behind! Have had a rough few days as have felt depression rearing its ugly head (have been treated for it before). Just can't seem to shift this black cloud I'm under - so I've made an appointment with the Lister's fertility counsellor, but as I can't get an appt until 13th Oct, I'm getting a referral from GP to see a therapist which will be covered by my work medical insurance. It's a horrible feeling - like there's no colour to my days and everything feels utterly meaningless.

Anyway, enough moaning from me.

Very strange behaviour from your friend chlo

Good to see another Lister lady on here plane!

I'm also going for scratch next month rose - pretty nervous about it!

Went to the Lister yesterday to finish off my blood tests (thrombophilia screen, thyroid antibodies and MTHFR) and DH had his DNA sperm fragmentation test. Results will be in a couple of weeks and have an appointment with Dr to go through everything. Holding off on paying for the tests until Virgin Atlantic credit card arrives in the next couple of days - may as well get the sh!t load of air miles out of it!

Mummy - sad to hear you're not having a good time on holiday, it's possibly just hightened hormones screwing you up. What's your hotel like? Can you have a nice bath or spa or anything like that to revitalise yourself?

Flash - your dream says nothing about your future parenting ability, absolutely nothing. You'll be a wonderful mum like everyone on here. We could analyse the dream all day if we wanted to but its just your infertility fears materialising in a different way and nothing to worry about. I do yoga, and my instructor said that anything that focuses on core strength is good because it massages the womb and reproductive organs. I can't remember the names of anything but there will be tons of reputate YouTube videos on it.

Rose - the scratch sounds very interesting, I'm wondering now if the NHS do it. Something to bring up at my next meeting...

Winging - one of my friends used to get this and it was diagnosed as cervical ectropion (I just checked for you). You should find it will go away naturally but if you are worried, you could go to your GP to get an additional smear done?

Pyjamas -Sorry you're feeling so down hon, good luck for all your results though.

I'm having my (now) usual 2ww breakout of white-heads and spots. Why does this have to be a thing now? I don't know if my hormones have changed for the better or worse...

Also anyone else here an introvert? These comics have made me feel so much more normal:
www.boredpanda.com/funny-introvert-comics/

Another scratch here - rose I'm also on the trial. Hoping it is relatively manageable as I think my husband will be away on a work trip when I need it done so will have to go on my own!

Spotting has begun today so my period is on its way - feel quite sad that this has been our last natural go and now the IVF is definitely happening....made even worse by the post holiday blues and jet lag!

pyjamas sorry you are having such a hard time but good on you for getting help. I know exactly how you feel about the no colour / feeling completely grey and devoid of feeling from previous bouts. Would you take any medication?

flash agree with mud the dream is probably a manifestation of your worry about not getting pregnant rather than anything else - isn't it weird how our subconscious works

Thanks everyone - it's shit, but hopefully things will feel brighter soon. I've been medicated in the past (about 5 yrs ago) and it really helped. Want to try and avoid it this time though due to all the drugs I'll be on. But if it becomes necessary then I will.

Winging is your period normal otherwise? I get some clear fluid but not as much as you’re describing.** Another mystery of the human body and hopefully nothing to worry about

Pyjamas glad you’re getting therapy in place, is there anything else that keeps you well - gentle regular exercise? Hope you’re alright

Feeling really stressed about IVF process today. Found out from a confirmation text that our appointment with the nurses had been made - but hadn’t t got the letter as we’ve moved house. Haven’t changed our address as don’t want to disrupt funding / our place on the waiting list. They’d booked in on a day when DH is in South Africa - and we both have to be there. The guy on the phone said next available appointment is end of October which means we hit Christmas closure so treatment will be delayed. I panicked and started crying saying I can’t handle that so have kept the appointment and told DH he will just have to be here. I might have to get a bloody lookalike to come to appointments with me at this rate. We did tell our consultant we had moved house and she said as long as you don’t change gp it’s okay. I’m stressing out about drugs though as they get sent in the post - I think I’m going to have brief the nurses on our actual address and just say it’s all been okayed. Nothing is straight forward!! As if this process isn’t stressful enough already also !!!

skip am an introvert - thanks for the link, made me laugh

Really sorry for the stress lots of you are going through - pyjamas hate that you can feel depression coming on, but glad you're seeking some support. Hope DH is there for you xx

lemon sorry I can't help re crossover btw private & NHS - but if it's the fanjo-cam ultrasound after 3/21 day tests, my NHS appt only took a few weeks from referral. Appreciate different areas/hospitals will have different waiting times, but hopefully shouldn't be too long a wait either way.

Lemony I’m not sure about claiming it from insurance but I paid for a private scan whilst on clomid and they sent the results to my GP - with my consent.

Morning all xx

Morning all,

Sorry to hear all the stress that everyone is under xx

Struggleisreal - I'll let you know what the scratch is like. One of the nurses said it's like a smear test, and you feel fine afterwards. Another one said it's painful, you have gas and air, and feel awful and groggy afterwards. I'm hoping the first nurse is correct and I feel fine! I'll let you know on Tuesday which it is. Can you get a cab home instead of driving in case you don't feel up to it? xx

Hey ladies, just dropping in to say hello. Kindly kwick messaged me last week to see how I was doing and I'll be honest, I've not been good. Since my edd passed I've just been feeling rather numb.

My cycle lengthened slightly last cycle but I ovulated later. Since the mmc my cycles have been short. Which means my luteal phase is still 8/9 days at best. I'm thinking of starting acupuncture but I completely feel like I'm stuck in a hole. I need to lose weight. My cycles are shit & I just don't feel ok.

Thoughts have started to creep in that this might never happen for us and weirdly I don't know how I feel about it. I just feel sad. This past cycle I haven't tracked anything but cm and BD but I'm fully expecting af to turn up this weekend. I think I may have to take the plunge and visit the gp for the next step.

I hope you're all doing as well as expected. Hugs all round. Xxxxx

Lemony - generally insurance will not cover fertility related issues, I have lots of private healthcare (through my work and my mothers work) but neither would play ball on that one. A doctor always has to refer you privately I believe, then it should just be a case of phoning the private clinic up and booking it in. If your insurance has good customer service, they may even organise it for you but on the basis that you'll pay for the full cost of it.

I'd speak to your insurance again and ask them what you need to do, in my experience they are so helpful even when they can't cash out.

Sorry to hear your having such a rough time Mouse but I can assure you it WILL happen though. It may feel hopeless right now but you'll get there. Besides you can't give up - thread rules, sorry! 🐼

Hugs mouse - you're not alone. ❤️

Mouse I'm not sure if you have tried it and I don't usually recommend things, but have you considered trying Agnus Castus? I took it for two cycles and they went haywire, as soon as I came off it, hey presto, 26 day cycles, OV on CD13, 12/13 day LP, no spotting after OVing, apart from a couple of days before AF. So while I thought it had messed it up, I think it just seemed to rest it. These last two cycles are the first two normal ones I've had in about 18 months.