Thread 32 | TTC#1 | Making the move from conception to infertility. We've taken some blows but we are not beaten

[Jamon]

Hi all. We're a group of first timers who've been plugging away on the conception boards for some time. The support here is amazing so if you're in a similar boat please jump onboard.

Time to hand hold through treatments and support each other through to becoming the mums we deserve to be 💪🏼🌸🙏🏼

Hello Frau sorry you find yourself here but you’re in good company

Good luck with your first appointment babi , I found it helpful to jot down my questions beforehand. It can be easy to get overwhelmed and forget them

Rose that ivf rule makes me so mad. What about your wishes / desires / health / needs / right to be a parent??

Skip you’ve done good and I hope to hell one of these cycles it just turns up

I must have missed the Ant stuff?

Welcome frau! I am really sorry to hear about your MCs. I am intrigued that they are allowing you to do IVF so soon though - I had to wait for two AFs before I could start up again.

Hiya babi!!! I am doing SW too!!! I have lost over 1.5 stone since May - it is a hard slog but at least you can eat all foods!

Yuk someone next to me on bus has stinky breath 🤢

Rose I am with IVI in London - used to be with CRGH. You don't even want to know how much money I have spent already 😬 but ever single penny is worth it to fulfill my dream...

skip every other day is amazeballs!

I am still toying with idea of starting a You Tube beauty channel but need to come up with a catchy name and some actual know-how

Oh and Happy Friday everyone!!!!

Had to share this poem with you all, it just made me cry on the train.

With every tear that falls, there is a lost heart that calls.

It calls to say I'm here, don't despair, I will come to you

when the time is right, when you least expect me and through

the quiet night open your heart to me, accept me, I will be there

in the end.

Your wait may be long, you may get frustrated by the whole ordeal.

In the end I will be real. While others around you are succeeding your heart goes on bleeding.

I would thank you for being patient, I would thank you for being the kind of person who shows persistence.

If it were not for this, I may never get the chance to have an existence.

In the chaos of your day, the calm of your night, let your heart soar and take flight.

For so many tears, for so many years. You have been trying, thinking of giving up but never doing it.

In the end you just keep on going in the hopes that I will come to you, the one who deserves me,

the one who can love me as no other can.

You will be that mother that you always wanted to be. Just you keep waiting for me.

Jamon - the NHS rules on funding are so odd. I understand that there is limited money, but I do think it's unfair that we get no help with any costs as my partner has children from a past relationship. One of the oddest things I was told that we would get money if all his children were dead. I was at a bit of a loss as to what to say to that one!

Hi kwik - I feel your financial pain... I dread to think how much we have spent so far... before even getting to the IVF/ICSI stage I think we had spent about £8,000 on two failed vasectomy reversals and god knows how many tests and scans etc. We have just spent another £6,000 on the ICSI we will start in 2 weeks. I try to not think too hard with what I could have done with all that money....! :) I did say to my DP that our future children are getting no birthday or christmas presents!

Welcome rose and frau. I wonder what it is about us 83/84ers what means that we've all ended up here?!

I know exactly how you feel Babi and I hope the month off has done you some good. Take care of yourself

Happy Friday everyone! I'm off work today and planning a super lazy day. I feared DH was going to ruin it as he's been home all week with man flu but he's dragged himself into work so I can lounge around in my pjs and watch crap TV.

Jamon i just read the poem. I'm not surprised you cried! xx

Jam - shouldn't have read that at work 😢 it's so beautiful. I have saved that onto my phone and I'm going to read it whenever I get low.

Rose those rules defy belief. Who the hell makes these up?

Hurrah kath enjoy your lovely lazy day

Skip I’ve saved it to my phone too and I sent it to DH. We will keep waiting for our babies xx

Thanks so much for the welcoming messages - you're all lovely!

Jamon that's such a beautiful poem. I had a little tear in my eye reading it and I'm normally not the emotional type (pretty notorious for not being in touch with my sentimental side; friends call me the 'android' )

Yeah, I rang the ivf unit (also with the QE in Gateshead) and they said not to worry about having the mc so soon because all we've got to do in October is to go along to an information event and see the consultant. By the time all that's out of the way, they said there shouldn't be any problems starting treatment. It's a difficult one. On the one hand, I've read all this stuff about allowing yourself to 'heal', but on the other hand i know that truthfully I know that I won't heal until we have our baby, and that isn't guaranteed.

Me too, skip. I went to every fertility appointment hoping that something would be identified as the problem and when you're told 'unexplained' it somehow feels even more cruel I think.

Rose would you mind me asking what made you choose the QE? For us, i was under the women's health clinic initially then we're referred to the ivf unit so it wasn't a conscious decision. I'm pleased that we did that, however, because their success rate is good.

Hi frauneur nice to be another person at the QE. We were going to go to the centre for life but a friend of a friend told us such horror stories that we looked elsewhere. The QE came really recommended. They have been lovely so far. We start our treatment properly on the 3rd... seems very close now. How have you found the QE so far? X

meet not be. Sorry can't type well on my phone!

Hi everyone, I've still been around lurking. I think I'm pretty caught up.

SmittenPears
age: 32
TTC #1
cycle: 8
CD 1, first new cycle after early miscarriage in August.

for context, my cycles are very long, but regular. this was a totally normal one following the miscarriage, which is great.

I feel like everyone my age is pregnant or has a baby. Or is working on their 2nd. It's making me sadder than it used to.

Oh jamon
I did not cry... too pissed off and for that...

frau so you are not starting until probably Nov/Dec? I get the healing thing but really only from a physical aspect. It took me over 8 weeks to get an AF after my first MC.

Welcome back smitten!
So very sorry about MC

FFS building work delayed further... no way to be back home this weekend 😩

Sorry to those who af has got. Have some and .

Kwick how rubbish about the builders hopefully you will be home soon.

That poem is lovely jam.

Well i had my latest blood results back today. My t4 is now normal (was 60 something in june) however my tsh is still abnormal so waiting to hear back from the consultant. So good news really I think.

Lovely poem.

Kwick - how do you find slimming world? It's ok so far and I feel like I'm going in right direction.

It's very scary in my head sometimes.

💐 For you all ladies x

Well babi I have had a couple of tough weeks... food is my stress go to and I have been so stressed with the flat stuff...
But in general SW is totally doable - key points for me:

• I am going with a friend, which is a mahoosive support
• I am usually very strict on the meals when I am busy at work (breakfast and lunch) and use my syns in the evenings
• I have a strict plan for breakfast and lunch Monday to Friday
• I try and stay for Image Therapy
• I try and draw a line under naughtiness and get back on the horse straight away

Happy to share meal plans.

Look what I found....!

kwick share your meal plans with me. I feel fat and horrible tonight. All my exercise and dieting and ive put on a pound!

Pretty sure I'm ovulating today. Keep getting twinges in my right side which unfortunately is the tubeless side. I feel really moody and grumpy. Like before AF comes. Eurgh.

Sorry for being miserable. Hope everyone is ok and hello to all newcomers. I'll catch up properly tomorrow. Got a wedding to go to but it's a child free one and don't think I'm going to be surprised by any pregnancies.

Your wish is my command flash - this is a typical good day:

• cup of decaff tea (milk coming from Healthy Extra A)
• another cup of tea, full caff, scrambled eggs, toast (healthy extra B) with butter (2 syns) and marmite (very important for those TTC)
• low fat plain yoghurt with sweetner plus loads of fruit
• snacks: bananas
• a couple more cups of tea with milk, then I switch to something like 3 Cinnamon from Pukka (syn free and good for fertility)
• boiled/steamed veg & fish
• may use up some more syns on something sweet

Typical bad day what I had yesterday

• same morning routine
• same lunch
• snacks: carrot cake & sweet & salty popcorn
• jerk chicken, fried plantain, coleslaw

I think I will have a definite gain on Monday... it has been a bad week 😩

Marmite? Why marmite Kwick?

Hello everyone, can I join please?

My story (I'll try to keep it brief)

Age 38, ttc since April 2016. Diagnosed with amh of 1.7 in September 2016. DH has low motility. NHS ivf cancelled day before due to start stimming in March as Guys hospital told me my FSH was too high and that I have POF and will never conceive without ED. However I had a natural bfp in June, but miscarried at 5 weeks (two days after my wedding for added fun)

I had a Hysteroscopy at Serum Clinic in Athens in July. They removed a uterine septum and a ton of dead tissue. Nice! Now I'm CD60 and my period is nowhere to be seen. They've been irregular since coming off pill, but this is taking the piss. Really struggling with it all at the minute. NHS won't touch me with a barge pole and we're trying to get money together for further treatment in Athens.

As you were

Hi there Smitten, sorry about your MC and the sadness of seemingly everyone else having babies.

Hello Isthis and welcome to our lovely supportive and sometimes crazy group. That sounds like you've had a rough time of it.

Forgot to do Friday positivity yesterday so will go with Saturday positivity.
It's the weekend.
I plan to have a delicious lunch today, don't mind if it's out or at home but I've woken up thinking of food today.
I'm going to then have a lazy afternoon with an actual book, I enjoy reading but haven't made much time for it lately, unless you count MN!

AF is coming so all I can take from that is get back on the Clomid. I did ovulate last month on the 100mg dose so will take that again.

Happy Saturday!

mud cos my mate Marmite is full of amazing B vitamins which are important in the TTC malarkey

mummy welcome!
Sounds like you have been through the wars!
My friend just flew back after an donor egg & donor sperm Embryo transfer at Serum - she really sings their praises!
I hope you can get the dosh together to get back there. I think the lack of NHS funding is outrageous- I never had a look in being single.

Great PMA baguette!

Welcome Mummy! Sorry to hear about your MC, and right after your wedding too. 😔

Kwick - had marmite on toast for brekky, I'm really on/off with marmite. But it was okay.

Baguette - were off to get a nice lunch too, all the sex had been knackering this cycle. Then we're out for dinner tonight too - fuck it right?