Any success stories and ideas for secondary infertility?

[Annabellaboo]

Hello ladies.
I am hoping to get some ideas and support on here.
I am 35 years old, very healthy with a 3 year DS. We have been trying to conceive our second child for 2 years now. I became pregnant very easily with my first and had an easy pregnancy.
This time nothing.
I have had all the tests the nhs provides. Progesterone normal, I ovulate, DH sperm count is normal, no blockages etc etc. I have tried charting, ov sticks, changed my already pretty healthy diet (cut out refined sugars and have lots more greens etc, and alkalised my body). I take advised supplements and have even tried acupuncture.
I do however have short cycles, sometimes as short as 21 days but averaging 24. This is a little shorter than I had before my DS.
We cannot afford IVF and I am not sure I can face that anyway.
My consultant last month has prescribed me a half dose (25mg) of clomid, which a scan showed on the first round it definitely boosted things even more with a good few mature follicles. I already ovulate but she thought as my cycles are quite short and a little irregular it may give me a boost.
I have been convinced several times I was pregnant (oh how cruel our bodies and brains can be!) but AF always turns up.
I guess what I am asking is does anyone have any other suggestions of things I could try or why I can't conceive time. I am open to theories and alternative methods.
Any experience in this subject and success stories please share.
I try not to stress about it all, but some months it just really gets you down as there is no real 'reason'. The hard thing is watching other mums around get pregnant multiple times so easily.
Thank you for listening!
Anna

Closephine I have this same fear too. I've been going along for ages now thinking its him but closer IVF gets in convinced it's me now too. Keep thinking I've read so many success stories with low counts and his is 9 million not like it's 1! I think if you just try and look at IVF as maybe helping to uncover anything else it's better the devil you know? Also we know that his went from 65mil before my son to 9 mil so there's proof it does actually just drop. I haven't seen that board I will have a read. You have had a lot of tests though to rule various things out. I'm convinced my blood tests will show low reserve or something x

Morning all - gosh, it's interesting that a lot of us have very light flows... Thanks for asking closephine - yes AF arrived finally, after being 5 days late (kind of). That's the second time I've had a 30 day cycle in 2 years. I'm pretty sure it was late ovulation, due to stress!! I know it sounds mad, but my MIL came on hol with us this year, and I was REALLY stressed about how her and my own mum would get along. I had terrible anxiety. Although I wasn't temping, my heart rate on my HR monitor seems to act similarly, and it stayed very flat until later in the month. In fact looking at it now, I wonder if I had an annovulatory cycle. Anyway, onwards and upwards. I have started Emma Cannon's Total Fertility, which as I say, gives you really practical advice, so I'm looking forward to having something to plough my energy into. (For example, eat foods to help blood flow during period, to help you shed lining properly, such as aubergine, which you should also avoid near end of cycle!). Based on hybrid Chinese/Western medicine.

Closephine how was school? Or is first day tomorrow? Sorry I'm slightly out of the loop, is it first day ever? Even though you will find the siblings painful, it is a good chance for ds to make friends, and maybe you'll find a support network there too...?
Rose it sounds like the antidepressants are working, and maybe that will be helpful?Emma Cannon really believes stress is a factor in infertility (I know that is such an annoying thing that people say, but she gives lots of great advice for helping to cope with and relieve stress). I'm definitely considering them, mainly for my anxiety, but I'm going to try doing my mindfulness book/course again, which really helped me a lot a few years ago.

Have a good day everyone! X

P.S. Ooh, I'll save my sperm post for another day! That is already a long post. So much to say to you lovely ladies, but don't want to clog up the board too much! I thought I'd killed the board after my first mahoosive post 😁

Ktmac I agree my sil had 3 rounds on nhs and that was that it was when she referd to a private clinic it turned out she had an extra somthing not sure what now but that wasn't discoverd the first 3 rounds.i think the more you read the more you worry but sometimes you read other posts and then you realise there long time ttc is actually 6 months so chances are they didn't have any issues.hippybird don't worry about long posts it's good to know what everyone is going through and if there's any suggestings etc so feel free to explain away lol.im always heavy flow with clots but was always that way so not sure if it means anything.thats good hippy I think it helps when your trying out a new plan to keep you motivated xx

Katy - yup I get that fear. My DH's counts started at 13million but have progressively worsened to more like 3 million now (on a good day, we have had a few 1's!). But I keep wondering why it didn't work when it was at 13...?

Hippy - thank you. First day was this morning. It went ok, only a couple of years from both of us and I've promised him a trip to town for a pressie after school! Although I'm a bit annoyed at my friend... She knows our situation, messaged me to ask how it went and then when talking about her little boy who starts tomorrow, just told me how she's going to have to keep herself busy with her daughter tomorrow! I mean FFS i know I'm sensitive but that was a stupid thing to say to me right?!

And Tara yes, I've seen a few posts on the conception board complaining that they've been trying for 3 months...! Poor darlings...

Lol I know you just feel for them or the can you see a faint line and it's a blazing positive.glad it went ok today sorry about your friend saying that I just don't think any1 understands unless there went through it or going through it xx

Hiya! Are you guys ready for a new kind of crazy?! I wear a Fitbit, and I realised the other day that my resting heart rate (RHR) goes up after ovulation, spikes, then starts coming down before period. However, this month it actually went up a couple of days before, and has stayed up the last 4 days of period...! I've also been feeling really nauseous the last few days. It is prob a symptom of period I suppose. I did a cheap Boots test yesterday and got BFN, so I suppose I can't be preg, but it is mysterious. I've ordered some internet cheapy tests on Amazon, and will test on those again when they arrive on Monday. Odd.
Closephine what an insensitive friend!! As Tara says, she just doesn't understand, and I'm sure doesn't want to intentionally hurt you! X

Hi all - I've just seem my heart rate has finally dropped. It's a relief actually, as I was beginning to worry that there was something else wrong with me... But anyway, quite an interesting way to tell if you could be preggers, your heart rate would stay up, for any of you with a Fitbit. That's what my sis said happened when she got Preg with her last (number 4!!!)

Hippy bird, you should market a new kind of fertility tracker! I'm surprised the fertility gurus haven't caught onto that yet- makes sense that it would tie in with ovulation- interesting, may try it out myself.

Really sounds like we've had a wave of AFs in sync this month- how odd.

Closephine- I hope the first day wasn't too traumatic- yes I would have been equally pissed off with that comment from your friend. It's hard knowing when you're being too sensitive as it is such a unique set of feelings so that someone not going through it wouldn't understand, but nevertheless- you'd hope people would have a little more understanding and sensitivity. Did the pressie help?

Interesting to hear some people here have had light periods too- I really hope it's not a bad thing.

We are coming back from holiday today. Back to the grind. DD starts preschool settling in tomorrow. I guess we are about to embark on a whole new level of difficulties with her gaining awareness of other children having siblings and having to be reminded of it on a daily basis, like some of you describe.

Grindstone not grind. Need to get brain back into gear.

Rose hope your little one settles in well today.hippy did af not show then or is it a funny af?incy or any one else do yous take any pain meds?im in agony today with my ra I can hardly walk can't bend my finger either but I'm 3 dpo so after googling a while back and reading not to take any co coda mol naxproxen or ibrufen I litrely don't know what to do but it's so painful xx

Hiya - Tara AF did show, but very light again, only one proper day of bleed, the next two felt like winding up days, do you know what I mean? And today (day 4) will be very light spotting I think. Plus, I think I've been trained to to trust period's, as my mum didn't find out she was Preg with my bro til she was 5 months gone, because she was still getting her 'period'!!!
Rose I know! Tell me about it! I can't believe there's not more written about it!
Tara what do you mean by ra? I'm not sure co-codamol, or the others you mention, but I've taken paracetamol while TTC...

BTW - which vitamins and supplements are you guys taking, if any?
I'm taking pre-natal, but also, just started Q10, and have ordered nettle leaf capsules, which are supposed to be good for strengthening your lining (which I'm paranoid about, given light bleeds) and something called Dong Quai, which is supposed to be really good for menstrual problems, and for regulating irregular bleeds. Do any of you know anything about these, any useful advice? Also, would be interested to know what you guys are taking...

Tara you can take cocodamol all the way through your pregnancy! If you're worried remember that there's no implantation until about 7dpo so anything you consume won't have any effect. I was told not to worry until you see the second line on a test but that wasn't for cocodamol. I took codydramol all thro my first pregnancy prescribed by the consultant obgyn. You have to remember stress on the body can be worse than the alternative so make yourself comfortable.

I'm struggling to get the date out of my head. It's my dd's birthday next week and my due date this year was the day after. They'd never have let me go that long so I'd have had the baby by now. Instead I'm here obsessing over the fact nothing has happened since, not so much as a chemical. I think I've fucked up. So many things going wrong right now and I'd really like something to go right.

Oh interesting hippy! Not heard of that I might try looking at that too.

Tara I'm sorry to hear you are in a lot of pain. Is there anything you can take instead?

I'm feeling sorry for myself today. My ds first day at pre school and everyone had babies there to go back with. Finding it so hard today. I just can't believe he's growing up and not got a brother or sister. Closephine- your friend hasn't a clue! I hate ones that just don't get it. I told my friend today how sad I felt and she said yeah she feels sad as her boy has moved to a big room to make room for her impending baby in the nursery. She does not get how much harder it is to see your lo grow and think you will never experience it again!

Hippy we are only on the wellman ones at the moment.

Closephine I hope you are doing ok with the school settling in x

Hippybird - I take ubiquinol which is the preprocessed form of q10 and while it's not helped with ttc it's really helped with energy and arthritis! I haven't tried or heard of the others.
I did take Agnus Castus (vitex) for a while but it did nothing for me and tasted foul. I also take loads of supplements for variety of things but don't know if they help. I take iron &vitamin c, b complex with additional folic acid and b12, magnesium, zinc, calcium and vitd. There's probably more and I can't remember them. I did take epo as was told it helped cm but I didn't notice anything.

I wanted to ask about B6 - I know long term large doses can have neurological effects but wondered if anyone had taken b6 and whether this was the entire cycle or just after ovulation.

Thanks girls I swear I need banned from google you just read so much and don't know what to take what not to take🤔.funnu actually my oh has decided to take up cycling I said you can't do that it heats the sperm up lol he was like seriously you telling me everyone who rides a bike don't have children the point he's making is you can't not do things but my argument is we're already struggling arhhh.
thanks incy I didn't know that just read no NSAIDs as hinders somthing I don't know what now lol.i can't even imagine how you feel or say anything that would make you feel better just that I'm thinking of you and how hard it must be at this time.
Katy: it is hard and there all over joyed at getting sometime with there younger ones while the others at pre school when we would give our left arm for the stress they think they have.
Hippy: ra is rheumatoid arthritis just diagnosed at December.as for supplements iv just started the last few months.i take b12 and folate by prescription as low on them and folic acid.Royal jelly and evening primrose upto ov.but the last two cycles iv had iv went from ov cd16 to ov cd10 with a 27 days cycle used to be 32 days.i also have read b6 to be amazing for fertility and I'm going to add it next cycle.i forgot u had said you had really light flow that would also panic me and that happens to your mum god it must be hard as much as it sucks when af arrives I know that's it all over so you must feel like your in a constant 2ww.im really heavy blood clots the lot so no advise on that.and just a note about stupid friends lol mine last nyt was worried she was preggers so I said any mishaps as she doesn't want children at all she said no I was like okay you use condoms and the pill I know it could still happen but highly unlikely I asked when she was due and she's on her period I mean ffs so I pointed out that I'm dying to be pregnant and your going on about "bloating" she's 6ft1 and a size 8 although knowing my luck she bloody will be I think I produce somthing to make everyone around me preggers😂 Anyway sorry for the long post but thanks everyone iv took some pain killers and the pains subsiding xx

Incy - what neurological effects can b6 cause? I'm taking it at the moment but only started this month. I'm taking it for the whole cycle. I took it in the couple of months prior to falling pregnant with my son. I have NO idea if it had any bearing on me falling pregnant but decided to give it another shot after all the spotting malarkey I had last month.

You can get pins & needles and potentially permanent numbness but that's long term use of doses above 100mg I think. Was a warning on the packet I bought

Hope everyone is ok... It's been quiet (or have I killed the thread?)

So I bought a cb fertility monitor very cheap on eBay. It arrived today and there are dried in urine drips all over it. Torn between laughing my head off at someone selling it in that nick and being a bit ill. Nothing a dousing in vodka & antibac won't fix. Can't stop laughing at this

Sorry meant to say I finally changed my password so could reclaim my original name

Hi ladies,
I've been thinking of you all as of late and just wanted to say hello.
Closephine - I'm sorry for your friends insensitivity, total rubbish. I laughed hard on the poor darlings comment on the women complaining that have been TTC for 3 months.

Hippy- I also took ubiquinol, I'm not sure how much it helped, but my DH's morphology scores increased significantly when he took it.
Be careful with Agnus Castus (vitex), my fertility doctor told me its a natural form of estrogen and can interfere with ovulation if taken during your entire cycle. You may want to consult your doctor before going on it. It severely delayed my ovulation.

Love that the monitor had urine dried on BloopBleep! Did they put that in the description!
We have our review meeting on Thursday with the fertility clinic. I know they will say 'go again' but it's so exhausting. I've put on over half a stone this last two FET rounds with the steroids and have nothing to bloody show for it!!!
How is everyone else getting on?

Bloop imagine not cleaning it and selling it like that but as you say some bleach and itl be fine and gives you another little bit of hope next cycle I always think it helps if your trying somthing or adding somthing as you kinda tell yourself this might be what works.
Well I had no tests in yesterday 8 dpo so baught some on my lunch break and as I'm a poas addict took one at 2pm well there was a second line I mean after 3 years there was no doubt faint but there so done another one and same thing and then a different brand and same again!!but those were pound land and ic so got first response and neg and this morning negative!the first one was 20 mui and 10 mui so frer should have picked it up.oh said wait a few days and see but I either had bad luck and 3 tests were wrong or a chemical.im gutted just under 4 years and never had a positive ever I had to hide in the toilet at work to cry I just don't think it's ever going to happen and now my usual pre af symptoms are happening
How's everyone else doing anything going on xx