Any success stories and ideas for secondary infertility?

[Annabellaboo]

Hello ladies.
I am hoping to get some ideas and support on here.
I am 35 years old, very healthy with a 3 year DS. We have been trying to conceive our second child for 2 years now. I became pregnant very easily with my first and had an easy pregnancy.
This time nothing.
I have had all the tests the nhs provides. Progesterone normal, I ovulate, DH sperm count is normal, no blockages etc etc. I have tried charting, ov sticks, changed my already pretty healthy diet (cut out refined sugars and have lots more greens etc, and alkalised my body). I take advised supplements and have even tried acupuncture.
I do however have short cycles, sometimes as short as 21 days but averaging 24. This is a little shorter than I had before my DS.
We cannot afford IVF and I am not sure I can face that anyway.
My consultant last month has prescribed me a half dose (25mg) of clomid, which a scan showed on the first round it definitely boosted things even more with a good few mature follicles. I already ovulate but she thought as my cycles are quite short and a little irregular it may give me a boost.
I have been convinced several times I was pregnant (oh how cruel our bodies and brains can be!) but AF always turns up.
I guess what I am asking is does anyone have any other suggestions of things I could try or why I can't conceive time. I am open to theories and alternative methods.
Any experience in this subject and success stories please share.
I try not to stress about it all, but some months it just really gets you down as there is no real 'reason'. The hard thing is watching other mums around get pregnant multiple times so easily.
Thank you for listening!
Anna

Ment to say iv had no flare and no cramps at all x

Morning ladies. Rose- glad you like your office but yes I know exactly what you mean about hoping for the irony to secretly happen! hope the drugs don't mess too much with your cycle. If your progesterone was high then it prob will make it a little longer thank normal.
Closephine- yes q10 is good. When I was spotting I researched what helps boost progesterone. I started taking vitamin c, magnesium, zinc and b6. I cant be sure but after a few months my cycles slowly improved, lengthened and I had little or no spotting before AF. I believe the supplements and good diet has really helped in general. I keep taking everything as don't want to risk going backwards!

Hello all :) I stopped taking all supplements this month as I had to take loads of strong antibiotics for a dog bite. My cm was more normal than it has been in ages but as I wasn't tracking I have no idea if I actually ovulated. I found it odd that I have normal ewcm /wet then creamy. I haven't had creamy in years! (There used to be regular snail trails down there ) I did notice more fatigue since stoping the ubiquinol (coq10) which is really interesting but haven't noticed or missed the other ones.

Anyway I'm guessing i'm t 7dpo based on cm if I did ovulate... Usual side stitches, sore boobs etc which are no longer signs of pregnancy. Didn't really dtd very often this month as decided against actively trying for the month.

Hiya,

I've been in packing hell as we are moving in a week and a half! Ditto the recommendation to move it sort of has taken priority but having said that I actually welled up when I saw a heavily pregnant mum with a 2 year old in sainsburys today!

Closephine- I'm useless with the advice about spotting. I'm quite new to it as its only started happening to me a few days before period. I understand it's a worry though and something doctors seem to shrug off. I think stopping the progesterone is probably worth a shot.

Rose - good luck in the 2ww - don't forget we have it in writing about sharing out the quads!

Bloop- school gates must be tough and a horrible reminder. You can't move for big bellies in those sort of environments. My ds starts pre school in a week. We have to do the whole waiting on a playground thing - I actually feel like I'm going to start school! Hope the mums are nice as new to the area too! I think leaving him behind and coming home empty handed will be hard. I will have a new house to focus on though!

So I had our IVF open evening. It was actually quite good and really informative. Saw everything and a doctor was there to answer questions. We had our first appointment scheduled for next week for bloods and another semen analysis but realised its right on trying time so I will need to delay it. I'm not wasting a single sperm!

Anna good luck on the house offer sounds exciting! Empty bedrooms are a heart wrench! Our new house is actually smaller but room for an extension one day. So there's no room for a baby at the moment! Packing up and coming across all of ds baby things has been painful though.

Hello. Long term MN user. Feeling nervous about posting but could really do with some wisdom.

In brief:
DS nearly 3 conceived naturally.
MMC June 2015 8 weeks, conceived naturally.
IUI Nov 2015, converted to IVF as over stimulated, MMC 8 weeks
All possibly tests done privately.
High killer cells/Thyroid issues.
Intralipids.
FET June 2016 failed.
FET Aug 2016 failed. AGAIN.
No FE left.

We went privately to just get some help due to age and now feel trapped. Hard to walk away from the clinic help when you have named issues. Sooooo fucked off with not being pregnant. Does anyone else wish they never went near a bloody fertility clinic!!

Hey fraggle. Don't be nervous about posting, everyone here is nice & don't bite ;) I'm sorry to hear you've had miscarriages.

I can't afford fertility treatment so I'm relying on wishful thinking. I think it would be very difficult once you've started to pay for treatments with all the hope they offer to have to stop or to even just make the decision to stop if money is no issue. Then again I've read of many older women falling pregnant as soon as they stop actively trying. Wish I could be of more help but I'm sure some of the lovely and more experienced women will be along soon

Hi ladies, my AF arrived yesterday. Knew it was coming after all the spotting so at least I've had a constant stream of the miserables since that began, rather than one big hit with the start of AF. We've decided no IUI, no drugs, no vitamins (except b6) for me for a few months. I feel like I've sent my body totally out of whack by messing with it.

Bloop - interesting what you say about creamy CM - I hadn't thought about it, but now I do, I used to get it towards the end of my cycle (and hope it was a sign of pregnancy of course!) but haven't had it for as long as I can remember.

Katy - glad the open evening went well - which clinic have you chosen (if you don't mind me asking) and when are you hoping to start?

Rose - my follicle was 25mm and i triggered/ovulated the following day. Your sizes don't sound quite mature, however, if they were all headed that way, you may still have released all four I don't know?! Do you feel your ovulation?

Fraggle - welcome, I'm afraid I can't answer about wishing I hadn't started treatment as I'm only just about to start the Ivf route. Personally, I probably wish I'd started sooner like you and potentially saved myself a few years of hell. We have explored every possible route to fix my DH's low count first but none have worked and we are no further forward than we were three years ago. I don't think there is a right or wrong. As you have conceived naturally, could you stop the Ivf but keep looking for an answer on how to sustain the pregnancy once it occurs? I am very sorry about your miscarriages.

Fraggle - just re read - that kind of makes it sound like I've had no treatment - we've had four failed IUI's which were free where I live and have had a private consultation with a male fertility specialist. I don't feel like we've fully started down the road as not started Ivf... yet. Planning for January.

Yes me! Secondary infertility after first but clomid gave me 3 more kids. Amazing stuff!

Thank you for the welcome and kind replies. Sorry to hear your AF arrived Closephine. Will it be your first round of IVF in Jan? We are planning to have a rest from everything, feel pumped full of drugs.

And thanks Bloop. We are coming to the end of our ability to fund any more fertility input.

Hi all. Closephine-sorry AF started. Good choice on giving your body a rest from everything, let it find its own way again.
Fragglerock- sorry for your painful and lengthy journey. I can't add anything useful on the fertility treatment but have you read see Beers book 'is my body baby friendly'? You say you did test positive for high nk killer cells? Did you have any suppressants for this? If you do look at clinics again could you consider serum in Athens? It's a lot less money and they are very experienced with auto immune issues and treating older women.

Btw- we had our offer accepted on the big house! exciting. Will give me something else to obsess over which should be refreshing!

Congratulations on the house news Anna! That's great :)

I'm at an event today (run my own craft business) - so far today, I have had a look at the fb page of a fellow stall holder only to read the top post along the lines of 'I haven't been making so much lately as my body has been busy making a baby' and just now, whilst setting up, I heard one of the ladies on the stall next to me confiding in her friend that she is 5 weeks pregnant. I mean seriously word GIVE ME A BREAK!

World*

Hi close- ugh how depressing about all the buns in ovens. It really is everywhere and so isolating for us unfortunate folk. I still believe that despite the pain, this journey has a reason and I am grateful for all the lessons I have learned so far. But can the lesson be over now please universe?!

Yes Anna, I've been on intralipid IVs, and was retested and it did bring my levels to normal. Injecting soybean fat into me just seems ridiculous though!

Nothing worse Closephine! Getting pregnant just seems so easy for some.

That's great news on the house Anna! Something to look forward to.

I have all the signs af is about to start and now just wishing it would hurry up so I can take the good painkillers that actually work. Can't take them before bleeding shows just in case a miracle has happened. (Ha as if)

Needing to find things to occupy my mind so I'm not obsessing. I'm beginning to think it's probably too late for me. I'm 41 and nothing is happening. I just don't think it ever will :(

Hello all. I am generally a lurker but have posted a few times.. Quick intro. 7 year old dd conceived with previous partner. Ttc for 16 months now but have pcos and have not ovulated for the whole 16 months so obviously not been successful, plus partner's SA revealed extremely low numbers, lower than I have seen mentioned anywhere in fact, although there were at least some, even if they were few and far between and also not particularly lively. I have considered clomid but have decided to try metformin first and hope and pray it at least restores my cycle so we can get to wishful thinking! We are saving for ivf with icsi but it won't be until this kind of time next year.
Thought I would say hi! And noticed a couple of people seem to be in a similar situation at least. Which sucks cos it is a crap situation, but nice to feel a little less isolated. I dont know a single person irl who struggles with infertility, or at least bot openly so! So you do feel likenyou are the only one, even though you know you're not

Fraggle- I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriages. It sounds like a tough road and I'm sure you are sick of fertility clinics. I'm only just starting the journey. We hope to start ICSI in October or November but I want to go into this with a time limit/ give it a shot and then I just want to stop. Way easier said than done I'm not sure I'll ever accept it but want to know we gave it a good go. As Anna said I want to try and focus on counting my blessings! And I agree with the lesson lark- I've learnt it now!

Ahh closephine - pregnant people are EVERYWHERE!! They also make it look so easy. I can't stand their smugness 😏 I'm watching Gavin and Stacey and even Nessa is pregnant in this one.
We are looking at Guys ACU hospital. A bit of a trek but the success rates are better than local ones.

Bloop I'm sorry about your AF news. It doesn't get any easier does it.

Mysterious - I really hope metformin works for you. I've read good things.

Thanks Katymac - still waiting :(

Had an embarassing moment in mamas and papas earlier when I went to get a present for a friend's newborn. It reminded me I would've been having a baby about now had I not miscarried earlier this year and I panicked and ended up in tears. I felt so stupid I just walked out. Really thought I'd got over that but didn't count on leading up to due date. I felt such a tit afterwards. Think it's online shopping for this gift then...

That's tough Bloop! Nothing to be embarrassed about though, totally normal. I'm just struggling with being covered in bruises for the next two Wks from stopping the clexane and having to wean off the steroids. If it's not bad enough not bring pregnant i have to have little reminders every morning!

I agree with the time limit Katy, if you're strong enough to stick to it. I had the same plan but every time i fail i become a little more obsessed! At least this time i know i tried absolutely everything offered and recommended! Obsessing already though!

Sorry ladies, doesn't look like they'll be any quads to share round this cycle. Although still no spotting, I've just done a BFN and AF due today, so I think that's a pretty sure no.

Sod's law that the one month I actually WANTED to start spotting early, so that I could potentially have IUI this cycle (as we are going abroad on Friday and scan times would have fitted if it had come today) and it is still not here. Oh well. I'm a tad relieve- had the weirdest dream last night where I was talking to some fertility guru and she was telling me how dangerous it is to get pregnant when you're hyperstimulated as your baby will have a really awful genetic condition. ?anxiety dream or what?

Anyway, I hope everyone else is ok- sounds like they'll be a few clustered AFs this month, how lovely for us. Closephine- sorry to hear yours has come. Your day yesterday sounded pretty shit, of all the days of the month for that to happen. I think 17mm for my follicles is not right- can't find my record sheet though, must have been bigger than that- I know there were 3 on one side and 4 on the other.

Mysterious- sorry to hear about your struggles, I think metformin is a good move. Don't lose hope, I think there is a lot that can be done for women with PCOS and fertility difficulties.

Fragglerock- sorry about your miscarriages, it all sounds so painful. I'm afraid I can't offer much advice as we are yet to embark on the fertility treatment route (though would like to now), but best of luck with whatever decision you make, not an easy one at all.

Bloop- all my sympathy, I've been there- not in Mamas and papas, but in lots of other places. Have hidden in toilets for half an hour trying to pull myself together, and worn sunglasses indoors, all to avoid people seeing me cry. It sucks doesn't it.