Infertility Rant!

[loopylou1984]

Thread two moving on from infertility meltdown!
Feel free to join us to rant about any part of the infertility journey

Shell!! Wow, those numbers seem high to me! So exciting

I've seen your reply, don't worry.

Chops - having a son will be so lovely ???? Xx

Hi all,

I was hoping I could join you all.

DH and I were told that we would be unable to conceive naturally; DH has had two SAs and both have some back with no sperm.

We are exploring our options of assisted conception (if they can find any sperm!) and adoption. We have been referred to the fertility clinic but we are still waiting for our appointment to come through.

Hi Pixa, glad you found us .

Did they say how long the referral was likely to take? Xx

Hi pixa I still lurk here too I'm afraid :-)

This is a quiet friendly understanding group, welcome.

Oh Aussie how did your EC go? Hope you are feeling well and got/get some good news :-)

hi ladies,

congrats chops... baby boy!!! yepppeeee!

good news on the bloods shel - i beat you cant wait til aug to know if its single or twin preg. im guessing you can find out the sex of the baby at the same time?

thanks ruby for your best wishes and sorry to hear your disappointing news sammy! i know it seems like ages away but try and keep yourself busy and going back to work is probably a good distraction x

as for me... well i had my ec yday and received phone call just now. so 12 eggs collected, out of which 9 were suitable for icsi, and only 4 fertilised. i asked them how the numbers look and they said egg quality slightly on the low side which can be due to the stimulation!

i know i only need 1 but cant stop feeling that its failed already!!! so in a nutshell these stats are not very much different from my round with nhs and all that money and time spent in addition!!! im just getting upset!

sorry ladies for the rant and the not so positive vibe on the thread xxx

Wishing your 4 embryos on Aussie don't get upset, your baby could be one of those 4, don't give up hope. I'm blubbing writin this, what an emotional wreck I am!

Thinking of you Aussie!! Have everything crossed!!! Xx

thanks ladies... i suppose theres nothing i can do now. just wait for my call tomorrow morning. i pray the 4 are off top quality now xxx

Aussie - sorry you're feeling low, but 4 little embryos is still good, keeping my fingers tightly crossed that they all progress for you. Xx

Also, how are you feeling? Keep drinking!!! Xx

thanks ladies for all your kind wishes!

i feel abit sore and trying to drink plenty of water which im finding harder now than whilst stimming. is that normal?

hows everyone else getting along? x

Aussie - I really struggled after egg collection. The first day I was sore and just didn't want to fill my tummy up, and then the OHSS kicked in and I felt sick.
Really try though, I'm certain that my lack of fluid intake made the OHSS worse. Maybe try sucking ice cubes if you can't drink.

I'm alright, have a really sore eye which I think is a stress induced stye . Am hoping it goes away after an evening of hot compresses. Xx

Urgh got a stinking summer cold :-( been off sick 2 days. Watching movies and napping. Can't take anything to help either. Mega washed out

Hope you don't suffer OHSS too Aussie but you had much less eggs than sammy so the risk must be lower yes?

Only 6 less eggs than me, but the risk will be less even so. I'm sure you'll be ok Aussie, I think I was just unlucky.

Oh chops, you poor thing. Paracetamol is ok isn't it? Hope your dh is looking after you? Xx

Welcome Pixa. Goodness, that sounds like a stressful situation to be in. My husband had 100% abnormal sperm, but at least he had some. I hope that you are not kept waiting too long before you get an appointment to find out if any sperm can be found.

You are more than welcome to rant away here Aussie. No need to apologize. That is what we are here for. I can totally understand being disappointed with 4 embryos after 12 eggs collected. I was very disappointed my last IVF when I had only 2 fertilised and felt like things were looking bleak, but I felt a bit more positive on my day 3 transfer when I was told they were at 8 and 10 cells with minimal fragmentation. When will you next get an update. I hope you are told that at least these 4 are doing well and it gives you some reassurance. Did you do the high protein low carb diet in the lead up to this IVF? I read a study showing this increased success rate to 80% and since I couldn't increase my quantity of eggs, I worked on their quality. And even though I only got 2 embryos, they were both top quality and at least one took so I am a big believer in quality over quantity. And no I didn't personally feel to sore afterwards or find drinking difficult, but I never produce many follicles so perhaps that is the difference.

Hope you're feeling better chops. Movies and naps sound nice. I am starting to feel slightly nauseous on and off. With DS, it kicked in real bad at 6 weeks which is this Saturday for this pregnancy, so I'm guessing it's going to get worse by then this time too. But I remember others complaining of this on Mumsnet threads while I was doing failed IVF after failed IVF and I was jealous because I could only dream of being in that position. So I shall try not to complain on here too much!

Oh, and aussie, my scan on 8th Aug will be 7 weeks so too early to tell the sex. But yes, will be curious to know if one or two. Funny what infertility does to you - I already have DS and only ever wanted two children. But now that I have suffered infertility for 4 years and know this is the final time, I really want two! Also, DH has 4 brothers, 2 of which don't work and the other 2 cheat on their partners. I have been so jealous watching them all have babies while I have suffered 4 years of this crap. So I kinda want twins just to have one up on them and make this pregnancy different to theirs. Wrong reason to want twins but infertility does turn you into a jealous spiteful person!

Hi Pixa don't be too disheartened at your partners SA. My DHs first showed no sperm but that was done at our local hospital who don't have sophisticated equipment. The fertility clinic found some sperm on subsequent tests, although they were all dead, at least he's making some.

Love the 'jealous spiteful person' comment Shell It's so true!!! Aaaarrgghh!!!

hi ladies, just a quick update from me. i had my transfer today. they said it was top grades which is reassuring i suppose. but doesnt look like there will be anything to freeze (will find out on monday).

im on gesterone injections tonight - great lol

i honestly thought this bit will be the best part of the whole process - little i knew! im trying staying still and yet every moment i make and im like 'OMG'

sorry Pixa for ignoring your post earlier... from my experience... i would say is take a second opinion start exploring your options sooner than later. and start giving your partner vitamins and improve his diet as that does improve sperm quality and quantity x

Congrats on your top quality transfer Aussie! Just the one embryo yes? Best of luck. When is test date?

Stumbled across this thread, I'm currently crying in bed while DH sleeps beside me, don't want to wake him and upset him. No real reason why other than my 5th round of Clomid didn't work and one of my colleagues announced her unplanned pregnancy the day AF arrived. I miscarried a few months ago and a Facebook friend is due the same month that I was, so I have the progression of my pregnancy that never was played out on Facebook.
I'm grieving for my lost baby, but I think I'm grieving more for the fact that I never thought I would be at this stage after 2 and a half years. I'm tired, part of me just wants to give up.

I felt like a bit of a mean old cow writing about my spitefulness towards my inlaws and their repeated easy conceptions in their less than idea family environment. So I am relieved Laura that you understand rather than looking down at me. Nice to have a place to vent where others get it.

Hope you feel a bit better Aussie now that you've at least made it to transfer. You say the embryo was top grade's' - does the 's' mean plural - as in you had more than one transferred? So it was a day two transfer then? Did they say how many cells the embryo (or embryos) were?

Oh alpha, I feel for you. I've had 11 attempts at IVF and I totally get how heartbreaking it is. Each failure feels like another nail in the coffin and that your dream is more un-achievable. We've all been through the wringer on here, and when our first thread filled up and we started this second one, we decided to call it 'infertility rant' for the very reason that people like you who need to rant to get it off their chest can come here to people who know exactly what it's like. Feel free to vent away. I have found Mumsnet to be a lifesaver. Do you know why you are not conceiving naturally? Are you not ovulating to be on the Clomid?

Oh alpha you poor thing, hope you managed to get some sleep in the end? I know how you feel too. I suffered infertility for 2.5 years too and during that time 5 of my friends and colleagues fell pregnant and had babies. It hurt so fricking much. I can't imagine the pain on a mc on top of that too. I hope you and dh have some lovely couple things planned for the weekend and he looks after you.

Thank you both. Shellster I can't even imagine the strength you must have to have gone through IVF 11 times, extra big hugs for you.

I have PCOS and I don't ovulate naturally. I conceived on my 3rd round of Clomid then miscarried at 6 weeks. I know that it worked once so it can work again, but I feel like we've done absolutely everything right each cycle since and it still doesn't work. Then you see people who drink, smoke, eat terribly and still fall pregnant by accident and it's hard.

We have one more round of Clomid left and then it's IVF, so it just feels like huge pressure from this point onwards. I'm so grateful to be in a CCG that funds 3 rounds of IVF but I feel like I just want to fast forward to the point where it's all over, and either I'll be pregnant or not, but if not I can start to properly grieve and try to make plans for my life without children. I feel like my life is in limbo at the moment.

But I deactivated my Facebook last night and I feel so much better for it!

How come clomid cannot be continued for a longer length of time? Surely that must be a cheaper option for the hospital than ivf. Even people that ovulate every month only have a 20% chance of sperm meeting egg so its not surprising that you've not conceived again the last 3 cycles as you weren't in with any more chance than regular ttc-ers. How do you feel about ivf? Can you get clomid privately? Excuse my ignorance

I know, it doesn't make much sense but they'll only fund it for 6 cycles. Even though they always say for a normal couple who are TTC it can take up to a year to get pregnant and they won't refer you to fertility until then, but you don't get the opportunity of a year on Clomid, even though 6 months of Clomid is probably cheaper than 1 round of IVF. But that's an entirely seperate rant!

We could go private or cough buy it off the internet cough and I think we might go down that route while waiting for IVF if our last round of NHS Clomid doesn't work.