Would you be my Infertility/Clomid/Follicle tracking friend please?!

[scienceteachergeek]

Hi there ladies

I’m really looking for a ‘clomid friend’ or ‘infertility pal’!

I’m 30, DH is 38. I came off the pill July 2013 to regulate my cycles and ended 15yrs of antidepressants in March 2014 as I’d read that was the best plan if possible.

I’d been having regular 27/30day cycles since I came off the pill but after no positive tests, buying OPKs and the Clearblue Advanced Fertility Monitor, plus charting temps and monitoring my cervix and mucus it quickly became apparent that I wasn’t ovulating. After all the blood tests, sperm analysis, trans-vaginal scans and the HSG it showed that he was fine but I wasn’t ovulating, but there was not obvious reason why.

Fast forward to now, 2yrs since coming off the pill, I have been prescribed clomid and have taken my first 5 tablets. I’m day 12 today and have been having follicle tracking to check if the drugs have worked. My largest follicle was 16.4mm today and have to go back on Wednesday to check it again.

Do any of you know if that’s a good size? Or have any experiences of being further down the clomid path? Or are you in a similar position? I just feel like I’m going out of my mind and could really use a buddy!

Thanks for reading and hugs to you all. Interested in hearing from any of you xxx

Hi Lily,
This is year 4, ttc our first. I have pcos and also issues with thyroid antibodies. I have conceived twice in the time we have been ttc, first after 18 months which I lost and then again 15 months after that, which I also mc. So now trying clomid to try and speed things along. I'm also on a medical trial for the thyroid antibodies issue but I don't know if I've got the real medication or just the placebo.

I started on 100, my consultant seemed to think 50 wouldn't be any good for me (and I guess he was right as I only got one egg on 100 on my first cycle with the tracking scans).

What days do you take yours and what day do you ov on? I'm on days 2-6 but not oving until CD17/18 still.

Hi SuperUnicorn, sorry to hear about your MCs - it's heartbreaking. I was same and conceived after 18mths but lost it. :(
With the Clomid I'm taking it cd 2-6 and ov'ing on cd 13 or cd 14. Hopefully cd 14 again this month. I'm not having any tracking though so I'm back in the hospital on the 20th so I'm sure that the next 3 months I can maybe get something like that.

I hope you can get the tracking, I know without it I would be doubting anything was happening! I had scans and bloods for my first cycle but going it alone for the next 5. So this is my third cycle, I don't know what I think about it all really. To begin with I was pretty excited that clomid really would help but now I'm stopping myself in case it doesn't work. Or it works and I mc again. I need to stop thinking about it really.

I have put weight on with the clomid, I was warned it could happen but now I'm pushed further off my target so back on the diet. I need to lose 6kg but would like to get 10 off. As long as I don't put any more back on with my remaining clomid cycles I should be ok!

Welcome Unicorn! I use the CB advanced fertility monitor so that I know when I'm ovulating with my clomid. I was tracked the first month and the monitor got it right, bang on. I've ovulated every month being on it and am on 2-6 and ovulating day 16/17. Got a BFP on the third round after 26 months trying. Miscarried at 10+4 after having a perfect heartbeat and scan at 6weeks. Currently in 2ww!

I'd like to say that clomid has made me gain weight :) maybe it has :)

Hi ladies and welcome Unicorn!

Hope you're all having a good week. I'm still off post lap. Dont feel sore really and pretty sure I ovulated a couple of days ago which felt a bit of a waste as we can't try this cycle. Had my stitches out yesterday and also an AMH test. Mine was on the low side a year ago so doc wanted to test again - really hope the result doesn't stress me out.

I don't know about everyone else but all the infertility shite has really made me put on weight so I've been spending my time off eating super healthily and trying to get myself in a routine pre going back. I used to be so good with diet but post Mc it all went to crap and I've been terrible - put on at least a stone anyway, decided enough is enough and i don't want to feel bad about being overweight AND not pregnant so trying to beat the bulge!

Sorry for the me post! Hope the clomid goes well for everyone - know it can make your emotions go all over the place so I'm sending you virtual hugs!

God I'm same - Clomid made me put weight on my thighs. I have proper thunder thighs at the moment! So this month I've done kettlebell training for 20 mins everyday and it's made a massive difference - to my sleep, and my mind too. Feel a lot more positive.

Morning All

Welcome newbies, sorry you've found yourselves here. I hope everyone's clomid does the trick for you all.

Just wanted to report back that we had our 12w scan yesterday, all was well and the heart beat was still there. I was pretty terrified going in and had prepared myself for the worst. Pics aren't great as baby wouldn't cooperate but have attached one anyway. Really pleased we did the private 10w scan now as I saw so much on that screen. The chap we had was a trainee and I'm pretty sure it was his 1st ever one, he was so nervous and the lady who was standing over him gave him a really hard time. But we are happy and actually starting to believe that we may in fact end up with a baby in September. They brought the dates forward again so new edd 6th sept and now officially 13+3 today.

Well done on the kettlebells Lily

Congratulations Vap! Must be lovely to be out of the risky bit. Hope you're letting yourself enjoy the rest of your pregnancy

Congratulations Vap! Really pleased for you.

Hello everyone

Nice to see some newbies...although obviously not "nice"...I would quite like it if everyone got their BFPs and this thread moved over to the preggo section of Mumsnet.

NewLeaf - That sounds awesome. Your doc really sounds like he knows what he's doing. Hopefully you will go into this feeling much more confident. It's great that you're starting fairly soon! I know May feels like a long time away, but as you're actually heading towards something productive, and you'll be preparing for IVF, it will feel very different to your standard 2ish months of TTC. Out of interest, what did he say was bad about your NHS treatment? That's interesting that he felt that way. I know infertility is very different to many areas of medical care (and it really shouldn't be), but it was quite interesting for DH to be a patient in the system and to see certain aspects of it from a different angle. Obviously he is still VERY loyal to the NHS, because the area he works in means it truly is a 24/7 job and he and all his colleagues work tirelessly for their patients, but even he had times of thinking "FFS JFDI" (for the less uncouth amongst you: just fucking do it).

Lily - How are you getting on? I am so sorry about the baby bomb. They are just AWFUL. It is completely normal and natural to feel a little bit devastated by them, and it really doesn't make you a bad person (or if it does, then there are a whole load of other women on this board going to hell with all of us!). It is just not fair. The only platitude I would give, and I appreciate this is a platitude and I'm mentally slapping myself as I say it, but would you want to be with a man who puts pressure on you to have an abortion?! WTAF? I know I am gobby and self-reliant and it's not so easy for many women, but if DH (or any ex-partner) had ever suggested that I would have pointed them to the door. Platitude over, I'm really sorry that you're having to go through this .

Chocolate - How are you getting on lovely? How are things post-lap? Are you feeling ok? Hope you're managing to "enjoy" a little time off. I completely understand the frustration at missing a cycle (I remember thinking: OMG, what if that was THE cycle when it was meant to happen), but it WILL do you good mentally from having a month off obsessing about every symptom.

As for the weight gain, I hear you! Over the past few years I have gained just under 2 stone. Firstly, because my job is so all-consuming and miserable and we're not allowed 5 minutes to breathe let alone go to the gym. Secondly, because infertility is so bloody soul destroying. I am sure others on this thread/board will have been through the same. Good luck trying to lose a few pounds. On the one hand, I'd say don't worry about it because you're going through so much that this really shouldn't be your priority or be another source of guilt. On the other hand, I appreciate there may be benefits in doing something to make yourself feel better about yourself. Good luck.

Unicorn - Welcome to the thread. I am so sorry to hear your story . I just don't know how you coped with 2 MCs. How far along were you? I am so unbelievably sorry. Long term TTC is so awful, it just seems unbearably cruel to have it snatched away when you finally think it may have worked. I really hope things work soon (as with all the other ladies on this thread).

AFM, I'm still a headcase. I literally can't stop eating crap. I make myself healthy food to take to work, particularly things like salmon salads with spinach, pine nuts, cottage cheese and "good things", and the thought of eating them actually makes me gag. I then end up eating loads of "beige" foods. I have put on 5lbs in 3 weeks alone. At the end of the day though, while I feel quite horrible, I just DO NOT CARE ABOUT ANYTHING if this baby can be ok.

Anyway, have a good weekend everyone!x x x

Thanks Flatwhite - how many weeks are you now??

And I know exactly what you mean about the realisation that actually it's all very well my friend is pregnant but her bf wanted her to get rid of it, not sure how I'd cope with that and in fact I'm so so lucky that I have my bf who wants the same as me. My friend has been through her own turmoil and think I'm almost ready to see her now.

Lily - I'm 6 weeks and 6 days. I have my first scan tomorrow and I am so scared about it. I know it's better to know either way, but if something is wrong I am going to find it unbearable .

Sorry for the massive rant, but I am so angry today. My friend put up a photo of many of the the girls at her wedding a year ago (about 10/15 of us) and said how exciting it is that a year on one of them is a mum, some of them are about to pop and another one will be joining them in a few months. I know she doesn't mean me, there must be yet another friend who is pregnant, but people are going to assume I'm one of them. We had so many comments at their wedding about "When are you due?" and "You must be pregnant" because I wasn't drinking. I found it so upsetting on the day, and found it hard to hold back tears, so most people will have guessed that we were trying. I just can't bear the speculation and people asking (either her or me) if it's me. It's just very annoying because she knows about everything we went through and how nervous we are now (she's one of a handful of people we have told) and I just don't understand why that needed to be posted? Those that are further along/haven't struggled to get pregnant are probably 100% fine with it, but if that's the case why not tag them so people don't start gossiping about who the other person may be?

Sometimes I f*cking hate Facebook.

Hey ladies!!

Welcome superunicorn sorry to hear of your TTC journey and I hope Clomid will hopefully do the trick for you and give a little boost. I’d love to blame Clomid for weight gain but I expect its just from doing less heavy exercise (in the hope of that helping TTC).

science hope your TWW isn’t dragging too much! When are you due to test?

chocolate hope you are recovering from lap. When are you going back to work? I totally understand if you need the break and chill but work is sometimes a good distraction from the drag of TTC. As for being healthy (slim) again I am with you on that. Decided to beat the increasing bulge. We can do it! Like flat says don’t beat yourself up but if it makes you feel better about yourself by being proactive (in my case, yes) then lets do it. Plus being healthy and on holiday made flat fall pregnant so best we all follow this example hahaha

vap ooooohhhhhh!!!! I am so pleased and I bet you are so relieved thats over. I am no good with U/s images but huge congrats. you are having a baby, its really happening! wonderful news.

flat good to hear from you. if eating beige foods is what it takes and what body wants then do it! as you say if it gets you thru to the end then so be it. How is DH feeling about the whole thing? It is so awesome and such happy news that it can happen “naturally” and by surprise to us all really!!

The doctor here wanted to know what the NHS point in referral for HSG was if at the same time there was a referral for IVF as it doesn’t matter if tubes are blocked for IVF so why is this the last step, not the first one. (pretty obvious).

The second thing was about the monitoring, he wanted to know why my internal US scans were done on the days they were done, he said it would be a miracle to scan on the right day to see what you need to see to judge if its working etc, if you only have one scan per cycle. He thinks you would have at least 2-3 per cycle to compare results to. Again makes sense.

Lastly he mentioned about the IVF egg retrieval techniques which apparently the NHS has been doing the “old way” for 10-15 years longer than the rest of the world. I don’t know anything about this if its true or not but apparently their way - syringe out of ovaries by stabbing through vaginal wall (excuse non medical terms haha) is less intrusive than the old NHS way. I have no idea about this. But he was just saying this is not pioneering and that the UK only just caught up with what they were doing 15 years ago and he can’t understand why. I expect banana would know more about this and techniques, its all new to me.

What DH and I took away from it was the personalisation of the care. In the last year of infertility treatment in the NHS its all just a case file. No one “owns” you and your problems you just drift along the NHS treatment plan and scheme whether its suited to you or not.

Loyalty to the NHS - yes I am loyal to the NHS, I think its a great service provided and the fact that medical care is accessible to all is fantastic. Perhaps though infertility care shouldn’t be free on the NHS, perhaps it should be subsidised. Maybe you’ll all blast me for that comment being in the situation we are in. I think doctors visits should be paid for too with a small affordable fee to stop the hypochondriacs or time wasters who just want a sick note. my mom was rushed to hospital by ambulance and later died in hospital and in the three other countries i have lived in would not have accepted her without a credit card. no ambulance or no admittance unless you have a credit card and full health insurance (which always gets out of treating you!!!!). In that sense the NHS is fantastic. Cancer care and treatment, emergency treatment… it is bloody expensive and most people can’t afford that so in that sense i think the NHS definitely has its place for those unlucky enough to need that help.

Without knowing how the NHS works and how each department is funded I guess I really can’t comment and make such broad suggestions based on my opinion. But although the NHS didn’t work for me (and a few others I know for other issues), I love the nhs.

Anyway! Long post. Happy mothers day to those celebrating. Make sure your mothers know they’re loved. To the future moms and to us future moms (we’ll get there, hopefully next year). Hope you can celebrate it as a woman’s day. We all deserve a day of self love and TLC!!!!

I just got a +OPK so must go get busy.... Worth a shot as last Clomid cycle!!

Hi ladies,

Newleaf I’m so so so pleased for your news from the IVF clinic. It really does make a huge difference to have a Dr you trust and not to feel like you’re on a conveyor belt being passed from pillar to post

Totally agree with your Dr about the HSG - they should have done this before prescribing Clomid, as what’s the point in ovulation induction unless they know your tubes are open?!!!

Scans wise, my private Dr only scans 1-2 times for a Clomid ovulation induction cycle; for ovulation induction with injectables he scans several times as that needs more monitoring so your ovaries don’t go off like rockets and risk becoming Octomom He scans on Day 10-12 and then again if necessary to check it’s at the right size. With me he also triggered me to make sure the follicle ruptured - however my Clomid cycle was almost as much as a diagnostic exercise if anything, to see if my failing ovaries responded to stimulation at all.

Not sure what he’s talking about in terms of IVF egg retrieval, I’ve not heard any other way other than ultrasound guided transvaginal retrieval being used in the UK - I know they used to go in through the abdomen back in the 70s/80s but that’s not used any more, and hasn’t been for a long time. Friends who had NHS IVF in the mid 90s had it done the same way I had it done, i.e. dildocam-guided-needle-stabbing-through-the-vag-wall-to-aspirate-the-follicles. Unless he’s got some new technique that isn’t used in the UK / US / Australia / NZ?

Massive hugs for Mothers’ Day - it’s the endless shop windows and emails reminding me to buy cards and send flowers that get me. To lose your mother at a young age is so hard, I know to then go through infertility without my Mum to turn to has been heartbreaking. Thinking of you

science the boy in your class brought a tear to my eye. So excited for you to start at your new school too. Thinking of you and mr science, much love

Lily how are you doing? I am so so sorry about the baby bomb, I’d echo everything Flat has already said because she said it much more eloquently than I will, but know we’re sending love and hugs

Choc great to hear the lap is DONE and everything is sorted. My consultant is an endo specialist (literally wrote the book on endo, well a key endo textbook at any rate) and is a massive advocate of a therapeutic lap - he says he sees so many women who come to him after years of infertility and / or failed IVF, he does a lap to check out the uterine environment, finds endo / polyps / fibroids, removes them, and bam, they get a natural BFP or their next cycle works. Hoping you see similarly great results!

Unicorn welcome to the thread! I’m so very very sorry to hear about your mc and hope the thyroid is getting under control Really hope Clomid does the trick for you - can you push for monitoring for at least some cycles, as Clomid can thin the uterine lining, esp at higher cases and has a cumulative effect. It can thus counterintuitively ‘work’ (i.e. stimulate ovulation) but make it impossible to get pregnant if the lining is too thin for anything to implant. Can you ask your Dr about this? Hope your journey on this thread is short

Flat hope you’re doing OK - I agree 100%, I can’t bear all the normal preggo threads with their millions of kids and worrying about smaller age gaps than they planned because whoops they got instadiffed. FFS.

And fuck fucking Facebook. Sorry for lack of asterisks but I have a potty mouth and some situations demands swears

Interesting for DH to be on the patient end of NHS treatment - although in fairness it’s primarily NHS management and pencil pushers than clinicians that have been so completely cocking useless. Two friends of mine are both Drs, and they’re getting ready for IVF, and they thought NHS IVF funding policies were a joke. I mean, the fact I responded how I did, and yet the NHS would have written me off as a lost cause and too bad a bet to risk funding, says it all really

However on the flip side, my NHS antenatal appts came through less than 2 days after seeing the GP for my referral - including a booking appt with a consultant (or more likely a reg in her team) on a Sat morning. But we don’t have a 7 day NHS do we? I wouldn’t have expected non acute antenatal appts on a weekend, but apparently that’s what UCH offers. Amazing.

Oh and re beige foods, I think I will turn into a baked potato. With extra cheese. I don’t even have any morning sickness, I just can’t stop eating starchy crap. Oh and I’m so bloated a woman in my yoga class asked me how far along I was (it’s bloody obvious I’m pregnant because the teacher is giving me alternatives to do, and she has come to this class through two pregnancies so knows exactly why he’s giving me them), and when I told her she gently asked if I could perhaps be further along than I thought? I had to say that no I knew exactly when they put the embryo back and it’s just bloat and not bump

Good luck good luck good luck for the scan tomorrow. I have all my fingers and toes crossed for happy updates tomorrow

Vap huge congrats on making to the second tri, amazing news! And glad you found the pregnancy after infertility thread, I felt very out of place with the normal preggos on the antenatal club threads. Just cannot relate at ALL

Gorgeous scan pics! How are you feeling? Have the unicorns and rainbows arrived yet?

AFM, I am 9 weeks tomorrow, and saw our little jellybean on a scan yesterday. I persuaded DH to go and get a reassurance scan, because I’d rather know sooner than later if something goes wrong, as although with MMC the embryo stops growing, the gestational sac can keep on growing, and with my shitty uterine lining we preferably need to avoid an ERPC if at all possible, as the last thing I need is the risk of Asherman’s syndrome (uterine adhesions) which can result from a D&C - the larger the sac, the more difficult a medically managed mc can be. Cheery isn’t it that I’m planning how to manage a mc, but there you go.

Anyway, we went and saw the little duracell had doubled in size, was starting to look less like a prawn and more baby shaped, although in the pics and videos we got sent it does look like Tintin . I can’t stop playing the videos over and over again, just so I can listen to that heartbeat. Next scan (not a sneaky reassurance scan) is at 10 weeks when I have the Panorama test (non invasive prenatal testing for Downs etc) and they’ll do a scan as well.

Meds wise my spinal pain is challenging but we knew that would be the case. On the up side, I haven’t had any nausea or anything else, but my Dr said that pain gates mean I have a higher tolerance for symptoms i.e. my body is so busy doing pain that anything else just fades into the background

Apparently as the pregnancy hormone relaxin kicks in it has some kind of magic pain relieving effect, so I am hoping for lots of that. Although as I have hypermobile joints that will make things a hundred times worse, so I may end up being strapped up like stink to stop all my joints from popping out all over the shop. Shall I check myself into the scrapyard now or later?!!

Much love to you all xxx

Hey ladies

vap how are you getting on? Has the tiredness eased at all? Are your work colleagues back from their trip?

flat I hope you're getting on ok and not too stressed? And I hope the beige food provides some comfort at least! When is your scan?? Everything crossed for you. Do you have any symptoms like tiredness?? Bet it's difficult to concentrate on work too.

newleaf really interesting re ivf and so good you're moving fwd. I am really sceptical re NHS treatment for infertility. I can understand clomid is the first go to given the cost involved but I don't understand why checking tubes is such a last resort and laps are hardly ever done when there have been a lot of studies to support that they help with natural conception and IvF cycles. And it's so true that you're just a case rather than any sort of personal care. But yes, agree they are amazing for lots of other reasons.

Anyway, do you know when you would start or are u still deciding on clinics??

Ooh and great if you are on a health kick too!! I am feeling quite motivated at the moment but always good to have support and something else for us to focus on.

banana wow, 9 wks already - that's fab! And even better that you've seen a heartbeat. Amazing! I reckon get as many scans as you want/need to relieve your stress. I hate that we naturally think something will go wrong but reckon you deserve some good luck... And good news on the pain front too. Really good to know your consultant said that about laps - mine is a big advocate - I was even speculating to mr choc whether he just likes doing them, like a sort of fertility hobby!!!!

Afm, I am feeling pain free and good to go back to work tomorrow although not particularly looking fwd to it I must admit!! I have had my full lap results back and turns out I had a polyp which they've removed so consultant thinks this will definitely improve my "menstrual symptoms" and would have impacted implantation so fingers crossed. I also had my amh re tested as my gp randomly tested it years ago as part of general blood work before we even started ttc and it was low. Anyway, it's now well within normal range so feel positive - although no idea why it goes up and down?!? Seeing my consultant on wed for post op check up and guess we'll discuss next steps in terms of trying naturally for a while or clomid etc....

Re my health kick, I broke on Friday and had wine and biscuits and then we took my mum out for dinner last night so that wasn't great either but I'm back on it today - lots of green stuff and a bit of meat - exciting times!!!

Right, catch u all in the week and hope you preggo ladies still keep us updated regularly

Hello ladies, newbie on this thread. I have compleated 3 cycles of clomide, no luck so far 👎🏼

It's lovely to read about the success stories on here 💐

I was wondering if anyone had and problems with bleeding through their cycle?

Hi All

So, it's all lies, 12w does not = 2nd trimester, neither does 13w. In fact, only tomorrow when I hit 14w does the 2nd trimester start. Who knew? So unicorns and rainbows are not here yet banana although I'm hoping they will arrive tomorrow and I'll have a spring in my step not holding my breath, I say as I'm still in bed on a Monday morning doing admin writing on mn as its quite frankly just easier than actually getting up and going out to work. Feeling slightly more relaxed about things but still on knicker watch, you get a lot more cm at this stage according to all the articles I have read and I can confirm that bit is true for me but it's also pretty alarming, we were out shopping on sat and I had to go to the loo 3 times, not because I needed the loo but just to check there was no red.

flat we are all thinking of you at your scan today, best of luck, I hope all goes well.

choc pleased you're recovering, best of luck with your Wednesday appointment, I hope it all goes well. When is AF due? Will it be disturbed at all due to the lap? I hope you are one of these magic people who gets their BFP the month after lap. Make the most of your vino whilst you can! I'm so jealous when I see people drinking an ice cold beer or glass of prosecco with a strawberry. I've taken to smelling dp's beer, it smells so good! I even bought some prosecco chillers the other day in preparation for September.

banana you'll have to keep us informed when this pregnancy pain killing hormone kicks in, I'd imagine it will be about the same time as unicorns and rainbows aka never. But we can always hope. So pleased things are going well for you. As for the planning how to deal with mc, I have been the same, in the 12 week scan I had it all planned out, the questions I was going to ask, insisting on it happening sooner rather than later etc etc, it's just so horrible to be in this position. I have had 2 FB friends announce pregnancies on Mother's Day, even now I'm upduffed it still angers me to read their posts. Why write all this shit? Why rub people's noses in it all? Just why? And there is one girl from work who announced her pregnancy on the trip to Miami that I haven't gone on and she isn't due until October so she is clearly expecting no problems.

Someone asked when they are all back from their trip, I think they should be arriving about now, they sent me a load of pics and videos which I have loved looking at and has made me slightly jealous but not enough to have been there, interestingly the colleague who is also pregnant wasnt bothered by Zika, maybe I'm just a little over cautions but after all this crap I thinki deserve to be a little precious about things.

science did you test yesterday like you planned? Thinking of you.

newleaf hope you managed to make the most of that opk! So pleased your new dr sounds so well informed and is taking control. Hopefully you won't need him but if you do he sounds wonderful!

Best of luck to all of you clomid ladies! Hoping for some good news in March!

Hello. I didn't test yesterday as it was already an upsetting day for me as I should be nearly 7months gone by now. Tested this morning...

Shit the bed!!! science this is spectacular news - hugest congrats lovely, I couldn't be happier for you. Amazeballs!!!!

omg Science that's fan bloody tastic!! Amazing xxx

O M G
This is amazing!
Fantastic news Science!!!

Congratulations science fantastic an news 👍💐

Congratulations Science!!!!

And good luck FlatWhite!!!

Thanks guys. Just don't want to get too happy. Last time broke me. I have spent the last week convinced I was pregnant but didn't want to get ahead of myself. I just felt different. No idea what this means for the tumour but hey! ☺☺☺☺