What women want is an end to hectoring by feminists

[emkana]

do you agree?

he often wore dungarees. he was a handy old hector.

I am not sure about the way the cat and the frog are eyeing him up though. Inter species dallainces seem wrong to me in spite of my essentially liberal leanings.

I understand feminism dittany....I'm just not sure how far you can take it..

...women have rights now, probably more than men in some cases....what more do you want..?

Pagwatch. You're not the only one to hold these views. I expect she'll be along later to expand.

Minette Marrin certainly does not speak for me.

Tis only Minette Marin, she who says nothing of any importance, yet mysteriously is given space to do so. Agree with Dittany's analysis and although I have sort of fallen out with her on other threads I think thereason she might fascinate you, Daftpunk is because she is very knowledgable and right about this stuff!

errrr

I am worried now.
Should I be encouraging my dog to get it on with next doors cat?

There has never been a greater need for Feminists to Hector IMO. The number of girls in their late teens and early twenties that i know through work, for whom it's all about getting a man then keeping him no matter what, is depressing.

I swear i will scream if i hear "i won't dye my hair because X doesn't like it" or "D won't let me drive my car on my own, it's because he's worried about me " once more. The examples are endless.

It's like we've taken a whole step back....

Stainedglass;

You are so wrong..

My dh does alot just to please me....he would do anything to keep me....(I hope)

Men are not that different to women..

Your average MNer (if there is such a thing) is likely to be in a similar situation to what you describe daftpunk. My experience is of a general attitude i'm seeing in the female 'youth of today' that i don't remember from my own teens...(and since it's my experience how can it be 'so wrong'?)

Grrrrr .... I'm feeling feisty and cross! Hector, hector, hector!

Ahhh that's better.

this thread has cheered me up on a bad day
especially Dittany's post at 13.50 and SEA saying she'd quite like to be hectored by feminists.

Stainedglass;

You can be wrong in how you interpret your experience.....

...you assume that these women are weak...not necessarily the case is it..

I'm sure they would rather please their dp/dh than worry about what you think of them....you're not going to be the father of their children/their life partner/the person they love...

Didn't the Times and the Express use to be two separate newspapers?

I'm sure they couldn't give a flying fuck what i think of them. But they do worry far too much about pleasing their boyfriends, to the detriment of their own free choices.

What do you think about a lesbian doing things just to please her partner..?

That's ok is it...because it's two women..?

Of course not - the same would apply. And does apply.

I don't see how you can argue with me on this one tbh. They are in their late teens / early twenties and as soon as they get blokes they pretty much do whatever to please (i.e they change) - be it looks, clothing, driving, cooking etc. just to please. The blokes go out on the razz and crawl back about midnight for a quick shag before leaving again before dawn. And these girls accept it as the way it is. These are a specific set of girls i work with - maybe 10 or so. But i find it depressing and think it deserves a mention on a thread about feminism.

Not sure why it's wound you up quite so much tbh. There are plenty other posts on this thread...

what the article (and, I would guess, the research she refers to ) totally fail to take into account is that most women (unlike most men)do not have the third option - ie that of working whilst leaving their children in the care of a parent. they choose between working (whether part or full-time) and using childcare, or not working. this is a stark 2-way choice that hardly any men at all face. and it's faced with that particular two-way choice that a lot of women say they'd like to work p-t.

if (in the research) they had the option of leaving their children with their father I'm sure many would give different answers.

the article, and the research, also fail to consider what men/fathers want. because the vast majority I know would also favour part-time working.

when the pay gap closes and when p-t/flexible working arrangements become as normal for men, as for women, then men and women will face the same choices. and I might stop hectoring.

that article has really pissed me off.

No no...your post didn't wind me up...it just caught my eye....

I usually pick 2 threads a day that look half decent and quicky read through, skipping half of it.(I have never read an entire thread in my life)...some posts I reply to...90% I don't even read...

Sorry I picked on you.....didn't mean to interrogate...

i don't believe that women have the same rights as men in many different areas of life despite 'best practice' or policies in the workplace or even the law.

i don't necessarily think that by wanting to change this state of affairs one has to be a feminist either. more like a equality fo all ist! or perhaps a socialist.

any hoo, i can honestly say i haven't had a good hectoring by anyone over anything for an awfully long time.

i am frustrated at the lack of hectoring going about at the moment tbh

I have spoken to feminists online who've said things like they 'hate women who expect a man to provide for them' and they seem to really look down on women who want to take on traditional roles.
I dislike those feminists who like to think that a stay at home mum is just downtroden with no confidence.
I have a LOT of respect for women who want to take on a loving caring role who are there for their children.
I think that's more respectable than how much money a new mum can go out and earn.

Each to our own though!

"more like a equality fo all ist"

That IS being a feminist, it's all about equality for everyone, not women getting a better ride than men.

Everyone here has said it all, really.

These articles always make me wonder what the writers' grandmothers and great grandmothers were doing - because mine were certainly out there working, they were just getting shit wages for shit jobs with no chance of anything better. (Of course plenty of women - & men - are still in the same situation, but at least more women have the chance of a better job these days.)

Totally agree Dittany, hatwoman (& others) that capitalism has a lot to do with it, plenty of men really do do their bit these days (fortunately including my DH), and a lot would like to do more but are stuck in a system that doesn't work that way.