Nick Duerden in the Guardian - His wife "leaves me fully alone with my daughter for the first time" at 16 months!

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Is this normal, for a father to not be left with their child alone until they are over a year old?

Well said Wonky!

Excellent - my lunch break! I shall bring a mop lest those fearful puddles prove troublesome....

As a man why do you continue to perpetuate the myth that men are useless when it comes to childcare, or is it just male journalists who have this inability to look after their own children?

How did you react when your wife said "What have you done?" when she returned home and found you in tears?

oh yes shine that's a good one, how do your mates feel being called "selfish" when actually the weekend was your responsibility.

"Behind a cauliflower on the bottom shelf, I discover a forgotten bottle of champagne. I open it. It tastes good"

"11pm and they are still here. Amaya is asleep upstairs, the kitchen table is strewn with the remains of a takeaway, and we are horizontal after a second bottle of wine."

Swap champagne and Japanese takeaways for Stella and McDonalds, swap middle-class male London writer / journalist for young mum (or dad) on a provincial council estate, and we have quite a different scenario don't we?

One gets published in The Guardian, the other is a call to social services.

"At 8pm, she is lying in her cot with only the light from the rotating musical mobile keeping the room from total darkness. In the shadows, her eyes find mine and lock on. A beautiful smile melts slowly across her face, filled with benevolence and unambiguous sentiment. This, I become convinced, is reciprocal love finally asserting itself. Tears flood my eyes."

In our house we call a smile that melts slowly across the face with benevolence the' poo-poo smile'. It is the expression of a child blissfully filling her nappy.

(Oh god oh god Nick, are you sure you want to do this 12.30 thing?? The words 'sitting' and 'duck' spring to mind...)

what a self indulgent twat

Looking forward to catching up on this later.

Spicemonsters posts were very sensible and we have the same practice, each take it in turns to have a lie in (I like the one night off a week idea too, make have to do that). After I went back to work DH went part time to share care of DD. He is now at home with her more than me and their relationship is wonderful. He is completely equal in parenting and I expect nothing less from him.

I've been away from DD for 1 night at a time twice but I can see how you would never need to go away, mine has only been with work. That said DH and I both make sure we each get days to ourself, he will often take DD to his mother's to give me a whole day of, and I am not ashamed to say I relish it.

Anyway, more scarily, I am off to the States for a week with work tomorrow and DD has spent the best part of the past 2 days throwing up! I have no worries about leaving DH with her, he'll be fine, but I worry about him having a whole week with no break (she only goes to nursery one day a week). There is so much to do, we have run out of clean towels and clean sofa cushions. Poor DH!

I don't think you're a proper Guardian Reader. If you were you wouldn't be horizontal after one bottle of champagne and one bottle of wine between 3 people over the course of a long evening!

Haven't read the thread apart from the OP. This caught my eye because DH handed me the family section to read in bed the other day. I normally quite like it. I read the first paragraph and gave it back. Too long and too 'me, me, me', went to sleep instead.

Would you like to hear about me looking after my three children and also having friends round, and incidently how I REALLY love them?.....no, I thought probably not.

Glad the Guardian editors were interested though.

fuck me. I wondered why this had been stickied.

Opportunist PR?

Anyhow, I am looking forward to the carnage when I get back from my meeting. Please god don't go all apologetic and simpery on him will you?

...

Nicky you do sound like a bit of a knob but I think you were just shocked were'nt you? ...I believe it's not only men who perpetuate the 'Men are a bit crap' myth...women do this too presuming men wont/can't do some tasks,by allowing the men in their lives and their sons to do very little on the domestic front and also not including fathers in all aspects of childcare...

Nick, you have the worst website ever. I could make you a much better one. I give very good price.

Nick, do you feel a certain inner torment that you are paid to write this sort of personal tale of your own parental incompetence?

he has got big cojones

yes you will find I'm very reasonable

I don't even charge for the hours I spend on Mumsnet, rather than actually working for any clients

Steady on, MP. Such prissy methods would cut my income by about 60 per cent.