Re this recent child abuse case, can we have just *ONE* thread for competitive sadding please?

[solidgoldbrass]

Yes it's awful
Etc.
But we don't need a McCann-esque thread frenzy all saying the same thing.

What IS meant by ' competitive sadding'?

agree with op.i hide threads then 3 more pop up.and agree about McCann-esque .

it is very sad and too horrible for words .

Im very sad to read all the negative posts on this thread....im another mum from the bereaved mums thread.... My little boy died when he was 2 hours old.... I reckon sgb is a very sad negative person!

I think there is a massive massive difference between a horrific situation like this, and something like the Princess Diana hysteria for example.

I for one have found myself to be hugely more affected by these kinds of stories now that I have a child of my own (not that they didn't affect me before I should add). As a parent, especially if your child is a similar age, you can't help but mentally project your own child into that situation and the result is horrific.

Now, I agree that discussion of the graphic details is distasteful and I have been avoiding all threads and all media coverage for this very reason. We don't need to know the gory details (I definitely do not want or need to know them), but I think that it is perfectly justified to feel incredibly shocked and upset by this kind of news. You certainly don't need to have known the child involved to feel utter revulsion at the evil acts that took place. I'm amazed the suggestion was even made tbh.

These last few days I have found myself going over and over in head all the horrific cases there have been over the years. I won't be list them here obviously, but there are far too many and I do wonder sometimes how one can keep on living in a world of such utter cruelty.

What a cold and insensitive OP.

i think sgb acknowledges in her first post that it is awful, and merely asks that all the s are kept in the one place..?

i've definitely been avoiding this coverage, on here and in RL, and if there have been threads filled with s then i do find them ghoulish.

if it's a discussion on social work practice, generations of neglect and how we've got to this etc etc then i'm much more interested, but wading through after is a bit mawkish.

I find it deeply disturbing how many people on here are using Baby P's real name. Personally I find this deeply offensive - if this was my child, I wouldn't want a bunch of strangers on a talkboard discussing him as if they knew him. Have some courtesy.

Anonymity is afforded him and his family to protect them and his memory from gossip mongers and witch hunts. Clearly isn't working.

aitch, your post is full of 's, had you noticed?

personally, I think sgb has thoroughly lost the plot today, on this thread and another one I won't bother to link to

I disagree FreshHell

it seems rather silly to me to keep seeing that poor child referred to as Baby P, the early coverage named the whole fucking sorry mess of a "family"

the boy lived, miserably, he had a name

we should use it, it does not dishonour him in any way

dehumanising him, by removing his given name, does

Well if that was my son I'd be really upset at everyone discussing him as if they knew him.

Especially when they get to be completely anonymous, while dissecting other people's lives based on very little evidence.

yes, you twit. of course i see that there were s. i wrote them. but i'm not SAD, do you see? i was just pointing out how meaningless and ghoulish they are.

and one of the more upsetting things for, as it happens, the mcanns and the bulger families was the misappropriations of their children's names. honouring a dead child by using his name to gossip about him on the internet... give me a break.

if that was my son?

do you realise what you have typed?

I think she means if something bad happened. like say in the JB case, not this one

i think she does, yes, she typed it. aren't you getting a little hysterical here?

Aitch I agree. That is why I do JB. I would hate to think of his mum comming on here ad seeing her darling son being discussed.

nope, am quite calm

but I will leave this thread now as unfortunately it seems to be descending into people sniping at each other

and I am just as guilty of that

however, there are some cold-hearted people on here

can't leave it there (I will regret this I'm sure)

how can you compare sparing the feelings of Peter's "parents", to sparing the feelings of JB's mother who did not hurt her own son?

'if that was my son' could equally apply to the poor father.

I was going to write a nasty comment in brackets about how I couldn't give a shit how his murdering mother felt, but was trying to be grown up.
I do not compare the 2 in any way

this hysterical twit is going to bed

and I think I might have a little cry too

if that is OK with the hard-asses

OK, I think I've just seen one of the threads that the OP is referring to. And yes, SGB, you do have a point.

Whilst some MN are sniping at each other I think it should be made clear that the original post was, in my opinion, disgraceful. I dont expect any of you, who havent lived through the loss of a child, to understand the opinion of a bereaved mum. In fact, I tried, for hours, to not mention the fact that two of my four sons had died. All I want everyone to understand is - I only know and have met ONE MN in real life. One of the thousands on here who I can say is my real life friend. However I have made friends with a couple of dozen ladies who regularly help me and I would like to think I help them. We 'meet up' and sort out the world.

Months ago when Cod had a similar thread I was afraid to post. I tried hard to put down my feelings but couldnt do it. Now, a few months down the line I am more confident and have started to speak as I find. As I said many hours ago if you dont want to read other posters feelings and emotions dont click onto the feckin thread. Simple as, easy as.

I am proud of the fact that 26 and 16 years down the line I still walk the crappy path of bereavement. I still wake up each morning ready for the world to throw whatever shite it needs to throw at me. It is thanks to many friends on MN and the support of my family that I AM A SURVIVOR.

....and for the forseeable future I WILL light a candle for my friends childrens birthdays and anniversarys. In fact I went out today and bought more candles. It is the only way I can show respect and love for virtual strangers. God help the original poster and any supporters if anything awful happens to them. God help them.

he was specifically talking about virtual candles, lit for people with whom there is no association whatsoever, shabster.