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Original poster

AFTER THE PIT BULL THREAD ADVICE NEEDED DESPERATLY...

309 replies

kittylette · 04/01/2007 15:50

i need advice,

BIL and SIL have a rotweiller/alsation cross, its huge,

theyve just had a baby son

weve told them the dangers (shouldnt have to really) but they sent a pic of the tiny baby lay across the front paws of the dog

i have two sons and havent visted them for 2 years because i wont allow them near the dog

in my pre-kids days the dog attacked me, tried to bite me BIL had to physically beat the dog to subdue it away from me,

its not a nice dog

im fear for the safety of my nephew

should i phone someone?

social serices?

i dont want to but how would i feel if something happened?

when you first meet the dog, you have to sit low down on the floor with your arms crossed and not give it eye contact

surely thats not right?

sjould a dog like that be near a bay?

they say is soft as anytning, its a big baby

OP posts:
Original poster
kittylette · 07/01/2007 23:38

My DF is going to talk to them tomorrow, hes going after work

it may not be the action you all want, but its a step forward at least

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 07/01/2007 23:38

Can you ask your SIL or BIL to lie in front of the dog on the floor, then move suddenly and grab his nose/pull his ears and tail, etc - as was suggested a bit further down the thread?

themoon66 · 07/01/2007 23:39

Well done for talking him into that Kitty. Its a huge step forward.

lulumama · 07/01/2007 23:39

that is good kitty.....big hug for you .

hunkermunker · 07/01/2007 23:40

Kittylette, it's a step in the right direction. I hope he doesn't stay angry with you - please don't be angry with Kittylette, DF - she's doing a very hard and brave thing for a little boy who has nobody else looking out for him at the moment. Thank you too, DF, for taking what must seem an enormous step in talking to your brother and SIL about their much-loved pet - I hope it goes well and you can make them see why it's not a good plan to have a baby or boisterous toddler around a dog with less-tha-=cuddly tendencies.

Original poster
kittylette · 07/01/2007 23:40

ill suggest it hunker, i think they would argue he wouldnt do anything as they do toy fight with him

perhaps ill ask if they would allow my 2 year old to come round and do the same? (i obviously wouldnt allow it!! ) but just to see their reaction?

OP posts:
MamazonAKAfatty · 07/01/2007 23:41

my family are all dog mad.

I took my dog to Venture with us to have him included in the family photo's

My parents dogs get christmas presents, my sister even bought her a new collar for christmas costing £65. she is fed only the best food and has her very own chair rather than a dog bed.

trust me my family LOVE dogs. but what i can assure of is the fact that they love their children and grandchildren far more. if one of their dogs ever so much as snarled at one of us kids it would have been out the door quicker than you can say bark.

That was actualy the case. my parents current dog is a bull mastif bitch. she is a dream dog that will literally sit there whilst my dd gets on her back and holds her ears like reins.
they wanted to breed her and so found another bull mastiff male. He cost my dad £780.

He was in the front room one day and my sister (she was about 17) came in and picked my baby brother up off the floor and swung him round. the new dog dumped up and went for her, as she was swinging the baby round he only managed to scratch her back.
THANKFULLY

the dog was placed in the back garden immediatly whilst my parents discussed the next move.
we talked about the possble causes, ie the dog was layingon the floor and could quite easily have mistaken my sister picking up my brother for her picking up a ball and swinging and he just jumped up to play.

BUT at the end of the day, as loved as this dog was (we had had him 6 onths by then) it was simply not worth the risk.

My dad took him to Battersea that same night and explained the situation. that whilst we understand it may have been a mistake and that he has never shown any signs of agression at all before there was no way we would take the chance and so we wanted it made sure that he would not be placed in a home with children.

He was rehomed after 3 weeks with a couple who live in kent without children.

As i say, i really can understand how much your SIL?BIL love their dog and i can also understand how hard the decision will be but at the end of the day NOt doing somethign is far harder.

shimmy21 · 07/01/2007 23:41

Before anyone jumps on me for being a dog- loving-baby-eater please believe that I am as horrified and angry as everyone else on this thread but can I question the idea that all Kitty needs to do is 'report' this family to some authority or other and the dog will be spirited away and the baby will be safe?

As far as the police or SS are concerned the dog has no history of aggression (becuase Kitty did not report the attack on her). The police cannot remove all dogs from homes with babies just because a relative is concerned that something might happen. Reallistically if Kitty reposrts the dog the family 'may' get a visit (probably after a few weeks because it wil be viewed as low priority). BIL and SIL will assure ss that they keep dog separate from baby and the dog is a lovely soppy thing that wouldn't hurt a fly. SS will go away with their forms filled in and no concerns (until god forbid the worst happens).

Meanwhile if Kitty has reported them the family will be torn apart and they will feel enormous resentment towards Kitty. The damage to their relationship would probably be permanent.

End result dog stays with baby. Kitty is cut out of family.

On the other hand if Kitty keeps on with her tactic of loving pressure and concern they are more likely to listen and do something because no doubt they love their little ds a hundred million times more than they love their dog.

hunkermunker · 07/01/2007 23:42

Suggest a doll with a string tied round its leg then to make it move - a Baby Annabelle like Fatty said so it looks fairly realistic.

Although - toy fights - what do these involve? The dog mauling (in fun) a smallish cuddly toy? [heart sinks further still]

JustUsTwo · 07/01/2007 23:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
kittylette · 07/01/2007 23:45

TBH i dont know what they involve hunker as i havent seen the dog (apart from though car / house windows) for 2 years

but i remember BIl lying on the floor rolling around with the dog, pulling at him ect

he does have toys too

TBH i cant really comment on that one as i dont go round

OP posts:
AitchTwoOhOhSeven · 07/01/2007 23:45

kitty, any action is the sort of action that we are wanting to see. it's an enormous step in the right direction for your DF to acknowledge that the child is everyone's responsibility and to talk to his brother. well done to him. and well done to you too, it's not easy, all this. as someone else said, here's hoping your SiL has started to notice things already.

MamazonAKAfatty · 07/01/2007 23:45

x posts. im really glad your Df has agreed to talk with them.

i would also say though that toy fighting with a dog as large as theirs and with a rotty's breeding is an incredibly dangerous game. they may well find themselves getting bitten not just the baby

AitchTwoOhOhSeven · 07/01/2007 23:49

no offence, but here's hoping they do and it gives them a kick up the arse.

3Ddonut · 07/01/2007 23:51

I read the 'story' of the family who lost their 5 month old daughter to their pet rottweilers and it was heartbreaking. Maybe the family should read this to realise how their dog 'could' turn....Sorry.

Kitty, this is awful for you, I don't envy you one bit, and we are all hoping for the best outcome,not only for your nephew but for you too. We are here to support you too. Thinking of you, good luck.

louii · 07/01/2007 23:59

Not much of a friend if she knows your concern about the dog, and the fact that you wont let your own child visit and has done nothing about it.

I really dont understand how some people can be so stupid.

Its a dog which cant be trusted, if they cant see the risk to their new baby they are not the sort of people I would want to be friends with.

ILoveDolly · 08/01/2007 00:21

kittylette what a dilemma, i hope you and all your family come to a mutually positive and safe conclusion. good luck.

controlfreaky2 · 08/01/2007 00:24

really pleased to read this about df speaking to them. well done. please keep us posted

Original poster
kittylette · 08/01/2007 00:27

im pleased too,

i feel a bit better but not alot to be honest as the only REAL solution in my mind to this problem is them getting rid of the dog, and i cannot see my DFs chat, or anyone else 'chatting' with them resulting in them rehoming the dog

guess we will just have to see

ill keep you all updated

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 08/01/2007 00:33

Kittylette, I think you can be really proud of yourself for this x x x

MummyPenguin · 08/01/2007 09:42

I'm glad too that your DF is speaking to his brother. After all, it is his family, not yours, so imo, more his responsibility than yours. However, we all know how blinkered men can be, and you've done as much as you can really, Kitty. Short of going round there and removing the dog - or baby - yourself, I don't really see what more you can do now. Don't honestly know if reporting them would be the way to go. Who's to say it would be followed up anyway? We've all heard of reports not being dealt with, and then something happens, but hopefully, that won't be the case here. As someone else pointed out, perhaps your BIL and SIL have taken your concerns on board and are considering what to do. Watch this space, eh?

Caligula · 08/01/2007 10:50

I agree with Shimmy that it is extremely unlikely that SS or the police could do anything about this dog. But someone mentioned the RSPCA? I'm not sure it's within their remit to say whether the dog is safe around children or not, so maybe not.

TBH Kitty I know it's easy for me to say, but I can't imagine caring that much if such irresponsible people stopped talking to me. These people may not know much about doggy behaviour, but the fact is, as parents, they have a duty to bloody well find out about it. I'm not sure I could stand to be friends with people I knew were putting their baby at risk in this way - I think I would begin to hate them. I feel so sorry for you being in this position.

Clarinet60 · 08/01/2007 12:40

I agree with Kitty that she can't be the one to do it - she has to cover her tracks. But she CAN be the one who facilitates it. No more talking to them or to her DF about the dog - that's clearly pointless. What I'm equally certain about is that this business IS going to be reported and that dog IS going to be removed. Someone on here is going to do that, and they may already be doing so. That's a promise. But what we must do for Kitty is devise a smokescreen for her, even to the extent of getting her to retract everything she's said and agree that the dog is ok, in front of her family. I think it would be good if we can all get our thinking caps on about this, and fast - so that by this time tomorrow, someone on mn can report it.

Think of it as OPERATION GET KITTY OUT OF THE SHIT

Clarinet60 · 08/01/2007 12:46

Just seen posts about SS or police not doing anything. I don't know enough to comment about that, but there is such a media frenzy about pitbulls going on that I'm sure SOMEBODY would do something? We may have to get more cunning, is all.
Thinking about you Kitty xx

UCM · 08/01/2007 12:49

Oooo Caligula, you have said what I wanted to say, but didn't know how to without seeming like I was ganging up on Kitty.

I wouldn't take DS round my sis house because she had a dog that bit people and if she had ever so much as criticised me for it, I would have knocked her out .

I couldn't be friends with people who have so little regard for their child either, I would have to really step back from them cos' I would end up arguing with them over it all the time.

Good luck Kitty, it's a hard one. I also agree with Droile.

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