Sorry, but my children bore me to death!

[MrsBigD]

Not meaning to start a major debate here (that already seems to be happening on the articles own board), just thought it was quite well written and touching on one of the things 'us bad mums' don't dare bring up... imho she's a bit extreme in her attitude but simultaneously have to admit that I have had some of the thoughts myself at times

here is the article

ha ha, have now skimmed the thread and think
a) Oooh, we mostly think she's a bit of a tosser
b) the photo, hmm, we all agree it's very old, ha ha at the idea that it was of the last time she was with her kids!
c) I feel sorry for her children
d) fking daily mail
e) ha ha tinker at patronising and blu at media abuse,
f) who's going to call social services
g) who's going to email the thread to the dmail?

Oh, and I thought Pirates of The Caribbean was FAB, she doesn't know what she's missing, silly cow.

There is a difference surely between not finding your kids and all that comes with them fascinating for every minute of the day and begging the nanny to read them another bedtime story so that you don't have to see them at all?

There was another article someone put up last week or so (from observer/gardian methinks?) and the same thing comes accross - a spoilt selfish narcissitic woman who thinks anybody worth thinking about has the same thoughts as her (and can't write very well to boot). Why did she have more than one if she hated it so much (status symbol?). Its the kids that are going to suffer shes going to be too wrapped up in her own world to notice.

What gets up my nose most of all about self-centred arseholes like her is the use of the throw-away phrase "I love my children as much as any other mother, but...."

No, you don't. Freak.

Am walking away from this thread calmly to write my GCSE childcare sylabus!

yes - don't let the DM win TS&P!

lol I am still loitering so the DM abviously has me in its cluches - I must hunt out yestersay's guardian to redress the balance.

Although I was actually walking away from women tearing each other apart on here.

that's what I meant - women get at each other (or feel got at), the DM rubs it's hands in glee - mission accomplished...

Greensleeves, I think your last post was rather unkind given that TS&P had just been very frank, open and honest about her take on parenthood.

Really, it was quite unnecessary, unspeakably hurtful to TS&P, yet added nothing to the discussion!

I know but we all fall for it so easily. I have just stomped down the stairs muttering self righteous mumsnet prigs - or words to that effect!

I agree with Greensleeves that the woman who wrote the article doesnt sound as though she loves her children very much

don't think it had anything to do with twinset

I don't think greensleaves meant it to be directed at me - or at least I hope she didn't or I will be using words much stronger than prig But she did confirm the point I made earlier about the taboo of women who do not display the socially accepted maternal signals and feelings.

I disagree I'm afraid. This article was published - and posted on here - for the purpose of eliciting reactions. My reaction to it is quite strong and I don't feel the need to apologise for expressing it. As others have done equally forcefully if you read the thread.

I refer specifically to the author, not any poster on here. And I've been insulted in return. So live with it.

But I don't think Greensleeves was alluding to TS&P who is afterall, very very different in her approach to the author of this piece???

(why am I sticking up for a socialist worker in denial lentil weaver?)

I'm sorry if I read it the wrong way, greensleeves. I suspect you are right TS&P - maybe more of a taboo than some would believe!

absolutely batters - one of the few things that all mumsnetters can agree on, Daily Mail is vile poison...

I think referring to the phenomenon of "having no feelings for your children other than boredom and dread" as a 'taboo' is farcical. If the word taboo can be extended to cover things of that level of social unacceptibility, then there are hundreds of them - cannibalism, for example, or necrophilia.

Finding M&T group or children's parties boring, or not wating to read "Thomas and the Troublesome Trucks" 15 times a day isn't a taboo. It's more or less universal. It's just that some of us a) find lots of other things about our children fascinating, endearing and rewarding, and b) don't start with the assumption that life is all about self-gratification and easy pleasure.

If she's not careful her sons will end up with lentil-weaving, earthmother types!

Like greensleeves this is something that I feel so strongly about. There is a myth that women have babies and automatically fall in love with them ,some of you do and that is wonderful and I am green with envy.

Others of us do not and may never do, and we tie oursleves up in knots and can be catsigated and despised for being honest about our feelings.I do love my daughter although like Prince Charles I am not quite sure what I mean by love. If I think she is in danger I get a sick feeling in my stomach, I have been through hell and high water when to keep her with me. When she does one of her shows,says something fuuny or clever or is just generally wonderful I swell with pride inside, I burst into tears in M&S the other day FGS because I could not get over how grown up and beautiful she looked in her uniform. But when she is not here I don't miss her, I rarely do the bedtime routine and I leap at the chance when someone offers to babysit. Dp regularly takes dd out on his own at the weekend so I can build up my enthusiasm and energy stores for the week ahead. When she was born I felt numb and did for many years afterwards and I miss my old life desperatlely. I do see motherhood as a carrer option, something I will do to the best of my abilty even if I don't always enjoy it. I could say more but don't feel comfortable revealing any more about myself, even to a group of strange cyber women.

I don;t choose to feel this way, I wish it culd all be a bit more like a Boden photoshoot and as I said earlier I will never have any more children because of the way I feel even though I am constantly criticised and lectured on that choice and my dp desperatly wants his own child with me.

I do resent the accusation of being selfish or self absorbed ( am not referring to people on here as I realise that they are referring to the journalist) especially as i am naturally quite selfish but where my dd comes I am the exact opposite I just don't have the same psychological or maybe hormonal makeup. It doesn't mean that I try any less hard at being a mother.

I am sorry if I snapped at you Greensleaves ( it is my night for apologising) this is just a topic that hits a raw neve and perhaps I should have ignored the thread.

what a vile woman.. she doesn't deserve kids

twinset, I read your post and was struck by how different you are to the woman in the DM

Frankly, if they wanted a decent article on this subject they should have got you to write it . There's no way anyone could think from reading your post that you don't deeply care about your daughter - you say such lovely things about her.

That's what was missing from this article - any sense that the author had any delight or pride in her kids whatsoever. Noone could say that about you

not half as slung about as the myth that all sahms are dull ill-educated ant thick as pig sh**

wish she was a mumsnetter - the shame

here here, MJC. There is no feeling or emotion other than me, me, me in the article in the DM. Some women are not as maternal as others..