The Hoarders Anonymous Thread #7. Keep On Keeping On!

[Solo]

We are a mixed group of likeminded householders that are leading somewhat challenging lives; be that living with too much 'stuff' that we find difficult to deal with, houses that are falling apart (mine included), health issues within the family unit, wider family, or ourselves (myself included) that means sorting out our households is challenging, to say the least. So...

You are all welcome to join us for support, adding your own ideas to help others out, storage ideas, and even tips on actually getting those items out of the house which sounds so simple when you say it, but this part can be so very difficult; we are often attached emotionally to our 'things', afraid of letting things go just in case we need them.
Encouragement and support abound here, and we do not criticise. EVER! We even try not to criticise ourselves as it's not helpful to anyone, but this can be very difficult not to do.

If you are feeling overwhelmed by clutter, mess, disorganisation and generally don't know where to start. If you can't be bothered, but really do want to be bothered. If you think you are a bit lazy, or if you just need to see your highs and lows and everything in between on the screen here, join us, and we will help you. We'll virtually high-five your achievements - small or large, and virtually hug you when the need arises, and if you want a hug, just ask because we are here for you, here for one another because we get it. The art of washing up is sometimes our great achievement of the day, but it's still an achievement.

Welcome to thread #7 of Hoarders Anonymous - Keep On Keeping On!

Thread #6 HERE

I’m pleased you understand how eg executive function difficulties make dealing with clutter difficult.

I’ve actually had to let my spare room (I have a box room too) recently so had to move the clutter from that room into the box room. I think trauma (which I think I have too) complicates things too.

I’ll find the decluttering book and link details here if that helps. I found the most recent book on this I read really helped me and didn’t make me feel like such a failure for cluttering!

It’s staggering in my case, my cluttering only got worse in mid to late 20s, but I know I can turn it around.

Oh sorry Sing misunderstood, I thought you didn't know what to do with the box of crap. One question I'm asking lately and which applies to everything is "is this a good use of my time?". You've obviously gone through a lot in terms of life experiences, it's not surprising you're struggling and you're making good progress considering all that.

I'm having similar thoughts about the past affecting the present, but on a smaller level. Yesterday I realised I had a pile of towels, instead of the two per person that I acknowledge we need, primarily because my pack-rat mum had a pile of towels in the airing cupboard and subconsciously I'd been carrying around the message that this is what you do. It's the final piece of the jigsaw that's got me to stop buying towels. As they wear out I won't replace them out of habit, I'll wait until I need to.

On a bigger level I definitely agree the experiences and messages of the past affected our trajectory through life. I could get quite depressed about it but I prefer to focus on changing my present to affect my future. It can't always be practical though and some days I do need to sit with my feelings for a while, just processing it all.

It’s so important to find the balance isn’t it, I was ignoring some of the more significant ways my past had affected me, but I feel so much better having finally acknowledged them in therapy and with friends 💜 the last couple of years have been utterly transformative in terms of building my confidence. I’m lucky that the funeral etc happened this year and not a few years ago, because I wouldn’t have coped like I have now, both in terms of my own strength and of my support network 💜

Anyway, I eventually pushed through the overwhelm this morning and sorted through some boxes of random crap… and I didn’t check every item 💪🥳 I know lots of little things went and I’m ok with it. H noticed some Lego pieces going into the skip but I explained it as blue mentions above - it was not worth our time! 😁

Anyway, the skip arrived just after 2pm, and 2 hours later it looked like this! Really pleased, although it’s a bit sad how little difference it’s made to the house because much of it was outside or in the shed. But still, money very well spent because so much has gone. We will need another smaller skip sometime when we dismantle the shed and get a new one, the garden is awful TBH, but I’m ok with that for now, and I refuse to think about the shed until spring at the earliest.

I’ve asked for the skip to be collected tomorrow, no idea what time. Since the photo a tall bookcase has been dismantled and added (the cheap one I think I mentioned the other day that wasn’t worth H saving for a new flat) and I’m hoping I can sort more stuff to get more binbags flung on top. But for now, we are all taking turns to shower/bathe and then it’s takeaway time, we’ve definitely earned it. 💪

That's amazing Sing, all that detritus gone from your lives in a short space of time. I'm glad therapy has been so useful for you.

My progress has more been in my mindset recently. I'm not so much looking at things now thinking but I neeeeed it, I loooove it, I want to keeeeeep it, all of it! I'm finding myself looking around thinking it's in the way, there's too much of it, I don't want to be dealing with all this stuff any more and we don't need it! I still can't bring myself to get rid of stuff that I've spent money in and which I know I will use in the future, like the pile of towels. The mindset change is good though and I'm hoping it might be the change I needed to stop acquiring stuff.

On that note, I've set myself a goal, starting now, that if an unnecessary item comes into my home another item has to leave it. This will mostly mean getting rid of things in use, but not in the best condition. Or things that are new (although bought ages ago) that I don't like as much as the thing I want to buy. I think that's more realistic than a ban on purchasing at this stage

That sounds like a good compromise blue

I tried sorting more random crap in my room this morning, and I did get a fair amount out, but struggled to make decisions on what was left. So I’m tackling a big pile of board games and puzzles instead and there were some easy wins there for the skip and for charity and the rest now have space in the game shelving.

We also braved the built in hallway cupboard, it’s never really been useful as it’s ridiculously long and thin and just gets filled with crap. We had agreed not to worry about that this time but today we decided to pull out a few things from the front - more bags of random crap obviously but I’m hoping they’ll be relatively quick to at least reduce even if I can’t make decisions on everything. We are almost at capacity on the skip following this morning’s efforts so I’m happy to go with the easiest wins before it’s collected!

I'm in tota chaos here with work situation completely overloading me now, so Just running in to say; congratulations Sing! you are doing incredibly well!
and Blue this resonates deeply: "subconsciously I'd been carrying around the message that this is what you do."

Hello everyone, may I join you? I wrote a really long post last year under a different name as I was so embarrassed about my flat and how bad it has become. Its been a year and I haven't done anything yo change the situation, due to severe health issues and just a massive feeling of overwhelm. Years of holding onto past trauma and not feeling good about myself, but I really need to make a change.

...so I've made a start today. I've started flagging after 4hrs and so was looking for a thread like this to keep me motivated. In a flat without a car I'm worrying how I can get old electrical appliances out...

Valhalla if they're small check your kerbside recycling, ours takes small electricals like toaster, kettle, phone, camera etc. I usually put a label on it if it's working fine in case it can be used in the tip shop but they take broken stuff too for recycling. Otherwise if it's large scrap metal merchant will collect washing machine for free, council will collect fridge or TV etc for a small fee, it's £10 per item here you just phone up and pay. I know fridge is metal but it contains coolant gas that requires specialist disposal so scrap metal won't take it.

Thanks @BlueSummerBaby I will see what my council can collect. Ive achieved quite a bit today, 3 big bags out and some of the carpet can be seen in the hallway 😊

Welcome valhalla that’s great progress!

Just popping in, skip still hasn’t been collected which is annoying, but I have been able to add a few more bin bags so that’s a silver lining. House definitely feels lighter but in order to get ready to have a friend over (tonight, once smallest is actually asleep 😒) I still had to stash a lot of random crap in boxes and bags, and the living room and hallway are still a mess, but much improved.

The real difficulty will be keeping up with progress, I will likely crash tomorrow but have uni work to catch up on and then back to work Monday

I keep dropping off the thread. No real progress to report but I’ve just caught up on the last couple of pages and wanted to congratulate Sing on the incredible achievement filling that skip in such a short time! That’s amazing!

I’ve been feeling rotten, nothing specific just really tired and various minor aches and pains.

Welcome newbies & returnees!

Going to go and put some stuff in a black bin bag as there are loads of empty packets/packaging/old food etc that needs to go. Back later.

I've had a spell where I sort and take a carrier bag full into work and drop off at charity shops at lunchtime. Mostly clothes, books, CDs, china and glass. Deals nicely with the old carrier bag stash, too.

Also quite a lot thrown out in small goes - battered shoes, old makeup, etc.

I took a photo of each little stash and then looked at them all together - it's a LOT!! Little and often is not overwhelming plus easy to dispose of as I don't have a car, and it does build.

Also if anything comes in I see if there's an old version that can go - I bought a really nice resin claw hairclip the other day, and thought 'I already have a claw clip' - had a proper look and one of the teeth is broken off. So it went.

If you have two, keep the better one and say goodbye to the lesser one. I donated a set of plastic measuring spoons and kept and use the metal set mum gave me.

And I bought two pairs of sandals this summer - so the scuffed pairs from last year went. It's an automatic thing now - In? Out!

In my phone I have two folders, New In and Old Out and seeing the pics reminds me I have a process and it works. This encourages me and nothing on it makes me feel oh I wish I'd kept that.

And interested to see that I'm mindful of what I buy - everything kitcheny in is in white, grey, marble and natural wood - not for everyone, and that's fine, but it all looks so nice and harmonious together.

Talking of phones ...I tended to keep ten pics of one thing, so I now try to edit the best and DELETE the rest.

Nice to see you miaowse!

That’s so good JFDI! It’s amazing how it all builds up. Also I really need to follow your lead with digital clutter. I’m the sort of person who has thousands of unread emails and pointless photos/screenshots, and I currently have over 400 tabs on my phone… why?! I do deal with this stuff periodically, including unsubscribing to stuff etc, but it builds up quicker than I can get on top of it.

I have, as predicted, crashed a bit, although I feel surprisingly ok physically - I just feel lethargic and unmotivated. However I have found it easy and even enjoyable to look after the spaces I managed to clear in time for my friend’s visit, which was so lovely and felt like a taste of what I can have when H has moved out. I have been more motivated to clear up quickly after meals etc.

The living room does get messy incredibly quickly - long way to go on decluttering that, and I’ve said to DS we need to clear what has basically become his corner - his room is tiny and so the Lego is now in the living room, which is fine and saves me separating stuff out for DD2, but it’s also full of his cosplay craft stuff and I’ve said that needs to all be cleared up once Halloween is done as he’s been making his and DD2’s costumes.

I am dreading tomorrow as Sunday always brings a sense of panic about the week ahead! For once I feel really satisfied that I’ve actually made the most of a half term in terms of decluttering, but I feel really behind on other life stuff 😬

Hi all. I managed to fill a couple of rubbish bags from DD7's room while she was having a lazy lie in! She can get from the door to her bed a lot easier now 🫢. Main issue is clothes to sort so hopefully can get motivated for this over the next few days and also give the room a good clean.

My bedroom is slipping back to quite a bit of a mess so hope to tackle this also soon.

Kitchen is very slowly improving I think but long way to go for everywhere.

Hello,
I am back home now, the work in my home has been completed. The work has been so beautifully done, it gives me much pleasure to be here. Such a contrast to my life beforehand, was so stressed living in an environment that had so many seemingly insoluble problems. Mould, damp, mice, cold, mess.
I suppose because no one save the builder and the professional declutterer saw my home in its former state its difficult to express to others the impact of the change. But you will understand!
Think I decluttered to such a degree that my home is very bare now, as the starting date got closer I just chucked things out heedlessly, more chaos than Kondo. Am desperate not to go back to my old ways, am trying to rationalise storage, find a place for stuff, etc. it doesn't come naturally to me.
Glad people are making progress, well done with the skip @SingToTheSky love the In/Out process @JFDIYOLO @Elleherd hope some of your load has been lifted

I think all the stress and clearing out the kitchen for the roofers etc took its toll and I've come down with an awful cold virus or flu, felt ill last Wednesday and have been off work since and mostly in bed, had to get some oak milk etc from supermarket but didn't know how I would get back home, complete exhaustion, could have been the change in weather, darker days always affect me and I expect lots of cold going around. No fun living on your own sometimes.

moonshaped

well done , I’m so pleased to hear your progress, now you just have to organise so that there’s a place for everything and every thing in its place. Having a clean tidy home really is good for you mental well-being.

Morning all! Been a bit quiet for a few days, but lively to read about the progress being made. It spurs me on! I've had a busy time at work so not done much, but have kept up my plan to make sure dishes are all done before bed and packed away in cupboards. Just that is helping me feel a bit more organised and means the worktops are clear in the morning, which instantly seems to lift my mood!

Plan over the coming days is to finish up in the hallway, though I'm lacking storage for things like my Xmas tree and odd things. Need to think about it. Cleared the mound of coats...chucked some...a couple on Vinted. I need to go through all the shoes today. I've got some electrical stuff being collected by the council next week and then the hallway will be completely clear. THEN I will be able to get into my own bedroom, which I've not slept in for about 4 years. Very embarrassing to say, but there you have it! 😕

Lovely*

I had made a start on DD7's clothes in her room but then got dragged away by the diva child so will have to be done another time.

I'm doing a bit better keeping on top of the dishes though.

Everywhere is a mess but I have got rid of lots of stuff recently. Went through a pile of stuff in the hall and threw a lot out. It's less of a mess. The top of cupboard is messy still but gone down a level or two! (Out of ten) I'm sorting out kitchen cupboards and understairs cupboard bit it's in the everything is out phase so looks worse! Tomorrow's job is to make progress.

Popping in mainly to say Welcome to Vallhala always pleased to you miaowse, me too on digital clutter Sing, and a big well done to all making progress, and sympathies to those not. Keep the faith, that day will also come.
Have been reading thread but keep running out of time to post.

Today's a mad dash of launderette, shopping, garden control, refueling, invoicing, prepwork and project work for next weeks deadlines, fitted into too few hours.

In a holding pattern here just keeping washing, cleaning, garden control, etc, together but not really moving forward. Amazed that I'm even managing that tbh.
So much going on here it's beyond explaining, but biggest ones are poor Aunt has broken her leg and is hospitalized, surveyors availability is causing havoc, and work's just exploded overtaking everything, running out of time to complete study modules. Currently behind on almost everything.

Work situation's barely tenable but without income everything else collapses, so little choice to ride it out. The companies I get work from are on the verge of financial collapse. Their rescue plans have been taking on large amounts of additional work for lower money, which translates to freelancers like me working harder and harder for longer and longer hours and less money. The workshops and studios I use, have all had to put up prices, two specific important facilities have closed, and cost of materials has risen hugely since they were quoted on, so everyone's in trouble with this the period I make most income. But my ability to pick up better work is zilch, so....
Wherever possible I'm trying to imaginatively use what I have hoarded and in storage both to make up the costing shortfall, and as a way to dispose of it. Not much has yet left this way, but lots is earmarked for later November and December.

Hi, I would love to join if anyone is still decluttering!!

Currently going through some major home reorganisation, inspired by Stacey Solomon's Sort Your Life Out - I didn't think it would be that good but am completely hooked! I've spent the past couple of weeks buying various bits of storage (plastic boxes, hooks etc) and doing lots of decluttering, in the hope that less clutter = easier to clean... my new label maker arrives tomorrow and I am sadly very excited

I've had a charity shop collection recently - eight bin bags full!! And I didn't even think we had that much to go! Plus stuff out to the food bank, Freegle etc - I don't think I can quite manage the 50% they are fond of on SYLO but am trying for at least 25% of whatever I go through...

Tomorrow's jobs include:

• sorting out the fridge (something in there smells )
• finishing going through the photos & adding them to the photo storage case
• putting jewellery in a clear storage box and freeing up some storage space

@Elleherd , my work is really quiet at the moment too, it's worrying - I fill the time by doing some long overdue reports but I can only hope sales pick up soon! I'm reasonably well paid for a PT, WFH job and have no idea what I'd do if I got made redundant - our mortgage payments have more than doubled recently, and DP's job has been badly affected by the HS2 cancellation. I've thought about selling a few bits but a lot of the DC's clothes just aren't saleable - torn, bobbled etc - so I donate them instead, and the only big item we're trying to sell (a bed frame) just isn't shifting!

Welcome Kitty sounds like you're doing well on de-cluttering. Haven't watched sort your life out, though keep meaning to.
In my case the collecting of storage systems and label makers etc became a thing in itself. I fell into organizing the stuff instead of getting shot of it.

Work has gone the other way round for us. In a bid to save themselves from collapse post covid, they offered their usual services at effectively half price. I'm self employed and not payed by the hour, so we are working double or treble hours for an absolute fraction of the money, but there is little alternative. Scary times.

Hello all,

Elleherd the work situation must be very stressful. I hope things pick up so the income to work ratio gets back to a fairer and more manageable level.

Welcome KittyTalbot, I also love that programme. Thanks for the fridge prompt, mine definitely needs some more attention.

BlackeyedSusan well done! I need to excavate my understairs cupboard for a meter reading soon. Lots of the things that are in the way have been previously earmarked for ditching, but I got stuck on the final step of actually going to the tip /charity shop etc. so they are still in my house.

Valhalla and TalktotheHand well done for keeping on top of the daily routines! In the past I was also in a very good routine for laundry and dishes but that is no longer the case. I might focus on getting back to that as it was good for my esteem to have at least these basics under control. I agree about the mood-lifting effects.