Mad March Fledglings Fly in to action 2020

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A warm welcome to the monthly thread where we (loosely) follow the Flylady housekeeping system here to combat CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) with lots of virtual wine, chat and mutual support along the way. The thread leader of the month will post a link to Flying activities daily. Quite a few of us have been on here for a while, so we may seem cliquey, but we really aren't, and all newcomers, lurkers, returnees, regulars, and intermittent regulars are very welcome!

Very simply, Flylady is a zone-based cleaning system which we follow to varying degrees, depending on our individual homes, circumstances and energy levels. There are five zones and at the beginning and the end of the month we usually straddle Zone 1 and Zone 5. When you first start decluttering, cleaning, and organizing your zones, Flylady encourages you to spend 15 minutes per day decluttering in the current zone.

Each week, we work in a different zone. Each month, we repeat all the zones. After a few months of following this system consistently, you should start to see an improvement in the main areas of your house.

Pop on to the Flylady website to have a closer look about how to get started here but signing up for emails will probably lead to very many landing in your inbox. Also there has been some concern about securely downloading pdfs from the site so proceed with caution.

The Babysteps system is a light 31-day introduction to the system which familiarises you with Flylady routines (such as dressing to shoes, shining your sink etc) and with her philosophy, which emphasises self-care, her abhorrence of perfectionism and the adage that you’re never behind - just jump in where you are at - even if you only do 5 mins work, that is so much better than doing nothing at all!

There is a morning routine and an evening routine to keep things ticking over and a weekly home cleaning hour (which most of us find tight!) to change bed sheets, mop, hoover, take out rubbish etc. We've found over the years that the system isn’t brilliant for major decluttering so you might want to supplement with Kondo or another decluttering system. Flylady doesn’t want us cleaning all day so she is very keen on using a timer. Clean and declutter with focus, then stop and do something more interesting instead!

In addition each day has a purpose, see the daily focus here:
Monday: weekly home cleaning hour (can be split into ten minute sections and spread over week)
Tuesday: plan and play (menu planning, family event planning, doc appts etc)
Wednesday: anti-procrastination day
Thursday: errand day
Friday: clear out purses, bags, cars, date night
Saturday: family fun
Sunday: lift your spirits.

Don't hesitate to ask if you have any qs. And remember, there is NO wrong or right way of doing this, it is about adapting the system to suit your life circumstances, which will be different from someone else's, so feel free to ignore any step or routine that doesn't suit you or your home! And don't be put off by the barftastically twee language of the Flylady site, as the underlying system is sound.

And if/when it all gets too much: come and take a seat by the fire in our candelit, specially adapted, virtual "naughty" corner where you can retreat and enjoy all manner of lovely things such as fluffy pillows warm blankets, fine teas, strong coffee, and platters of sumptuous foodstuffs offered with lashings of support from fellow fledglings.

There may be mention of Ned (and his cousins Ted and Fred) who started their lives as autocorrections, but who have morphed in to virtual helpers, and are borrowed by thread members from time-to-time when the going gets tough on Mount Washmore.

Most days we pop on to post our "to do" and "ta da" lists of what we’ve managed to do and have a bit of a natter. Please don't compare your list with someone else's as this is all about individual progress.

More info follows (but again, please note we advise only looking at the pdfs and not downloading them):

** launch pad (general guidance and info) here

** daily babysteps pdf (ignore the ones that don't suit you or your home) here

** week day missions (some fledglings find it easier to do them at weekends) here

** info about zones (explanation of how zones work) [[http://www.flylady.net/d/br/2017/09/02/please-explain-the-zones/

here]]

** weekly zones (a rough weekly guide to which area of the house we are tackling currently, again adapt to suit yourself) [[http://www.flylady.net/d/getting-started/flying-lessons/zones/

here]] and here

** daily focus (helpful guide to allocate a certain day for a certain task) here

** deep cleaning lists pdf (only attempt when you have decluttered as you can't clean clutter!) here

Habit of the month: here

An explanation about the March habit of the month: Getting Dressed to Shoes here

Good luck and happy Flying one and all!

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Many thanks to Tinselette from whom I have stolen and adapted quite a bit of this introduction!

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And last, but definitely not least, a huge thank you to Expletive for running a really fast-moving February thread so splendidly

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Sorry about lack of job news that any chance you could face phoning for interview feedback anyway?

SC lovely news about the representative nomination!

Hi to all.

Achieved bugger all today TBH but just happy I made it out the house. Last night was insane, DH had to help me into bed and out of my clothes (not in a nice way 🤣) and into jammies. Worst I’ve been in years, literally years.

ta da
✅set DS his work for the morning (stuff that doesn’t need so much supervision as both of us were out and we don’t want to put pressure on DSD to “teach”)
✅up and showered etc and got to ACEs on time (made sure I rested while there by sitting on floor before the session and during the break)
✅psychiatrist appt - mostly good, she’s given me a generic prescription so I just have to request that they give me any brand but Concerta and ring her tomorrow if there’s an issue
✅emailed therapist

Scrunched up on bed again as period arrived early, FFS 🤬🤬🤬 need to get up again soon and will try and get stuff done after dinner.

Hope new medication works for you Lane

at you DH and DD leaving you a mess SC

That’s a shame if you didn’t get the job That but I’m sure something better will
come along if not.

Today was a work day, and a very busy one. I’d been my future friend and sorted bags and food. Managed to do my yoga this morning and stick a LOL in before I left (DD’s quilt and bedding after an accident - she’s been refusing a pull up for bed and we had a couple of dry nights but I don’t think she’s quite ready).

She was shattered when I got home and fell asleep on me within about 10 mins. DH is doing dinner and has remade her bed. I’m planning on sorting the kitchen and a quick tidy downstairs then chilling with DH. I’ve barely spoken to him since Friday

Still no flying here. I just seem to be bouncing from one thing to the next and now DS4 has come down with chickenpox 😫

Did manage to get to Morrison's after work today though and have made DC lunches for tomorrow which is better than I've managed the last two days.

Lane, hope you can find a med that works. KT, hope you still recognise your DH! 😂.

SC, the self-centred thoughtlessness of teenagers can be so wearing, but is part of the separation process from the Mothership, so is maybe understandable if not excusable. However, DH being a millstone is Not On. .

That, sorry about the job, how rude just to leave you hanging. Hope another opportunity appears quickly. Lisette, good job on multiple halls and lunch! Cineraria I have rather made it sound like everyone munches on the bathmat occasionally! Much like Mrs Large, I just want 5 minutes peace without anyone telling me "something really important" (about Harry Potter), playing me a tune on the toot-a-flute, trying to join in (yes, WillowHound, I'm looking at you), asking for the political background to the October Revolution (DD) etc and so forth.

And half way through typing that, DS3 came in (while I was in the bath) to say he'd "been a bit sick". Terrific. You couldn't make this up.

Ta Das today
☑️ DW x 2
☑️ LOL x 2 and dried and put away
☑️ Dog walk
☑️ Monthly budget fixed
☑️ Sat in on DS3's maths lesson - no tears today!
☑️ Sent DH back to bed for the morning. Neither of us slept well and we were awake at 5.30 discussing what to do with DS2.
☑️ Did maths (fine) and science (not fine) hwk with DS3. More hysterical tears about being useless and no good at anything.
☑️ Walked into town to the bank. Discovered DS3 had forgotten his bank book. Walked home again.
☑️ My turn for a nap as DH was home.
☑️ Made hollandaise sauce to go with salmon. It is so much nicer, fresh. And it didn't split (little happy dance 💃)

Ta Didn't
🔳 Decide what to do about DS2 and school. They say he won't get an EHCP, but he's falling down and they can't / won't help. I just want to shake them.

🙋 to We3, foxes, Stressy, Expletive, Shannara, Rachael, Hazel, Bower, zoo - hope I've not missed anyone.

Oh no, cross-post We3. Hope DS4 isn't too itchy and cross. Our DS3 potty-trained through chicken pox as he couldn't bear to have a nappy on. He was 26 months, though, so a bit older I think.

Hope you have porridge oats for the bath and piriton for the itching. Poor boy (and poor you)

Oh no re: chicken pox We3kings hope your ds4 doesn't have it badly. Never understand why the UK don't vaccinate against it like they do here, because it can lead to shingles later on which is really painful as an adult. Top marks for advance lunch prep!

KTCluck Funnily enough I averaged out the amount of daily conversation I have with dh and on a typical week it was something like 7 mins a day so well done to both of you for carving out some time.

Bloomin' well done for surviving yesterday evening and making it out of the house today Lane when you were in pain! Hats off for resilience!

Ta da cont'd/...
re-load wms done
-dining room table hot spot did it but messy again now
-make veggie curry done (cauliflower and chick pea)
-make soup done (butternut squash, pepper and chilli)
make apple cake NOPE have run out of eggs (more bad planning on my part).

Also, dd came downstairs and apologised. We are friends again. . Phew! She held out quite a long time on this occasion but gave in I think (a) because she couldn't really avoid me as I decided to peel veg on the table where she was doing hwk and (b) because I happened to know a bit about the Franco-Prussian war (studied it at uni) and she is studying Guy de Maupassant currently ... . so it turns out old grey mare mothers are useful for certain things sometimes ...

So we are all going to bed a bit cheerier tonight! G'night all!

Oh no we3 hope it’s not too long a bout. I actually just came to post that we think Cagletini might have it - very suspect set of spots on her back. But otherwise well so we are going to have a look tomorrow. Not sure what to do if we are still unsure tomorrow morning though?

I’ve been trying to get on with stuff this evening, very slowly. Really don’t want to be rushing tomorrow so it’s worth getting the basics done.

I hate being female 😡😡😡

It's been up and down for folk on this thread between job interviews, bodily ailments, also chicken pox and teens.

Washing machine has a fault and repair person can't come until next Monday. Have sourced old towels to tie us over. So no ironing or loads of laundry for a while 😊😜

ta da
✅helped DD1 with 3 of 4 maths homework tasks (mega stress at first until she settled into it)
✅delegated last one to DH once they’d watched the last bit of the football
✅wrote up Solihull from last week
✅Solihull homework
✅sterilised cup
✅most future friend tasks
✅chose a few games for tomorrow’s session (for anyone into that sort of thing, I went with Zeus on the Loose, Dobble, Animal Upon Animal and Cobra Paw)

Need to make another hot water bottle and have a quick write in my journal, painkillers and sleeeeep! Oh also find out where I put my prescription earlier 🤔 as I need that tomorrow! Must remember to check if DD’s are in too as she’s ended up on another break so she’s not sleeping.

What a delicious sounding meal, SC! I love chickpeas. Did I miss that it was for a special occasion or is that a regular meal or some batch cooking to freeze?

Sorry to hear about the chicken poxy and vomity DC. Hope they are all better soon.

Nightime wet beds sound very tiring, KT , neither of mine are able to go without anything yet, probably as a result of their favourite bathtime game being tea parties where they drink bubbly bathwater cappuccinos! We have used a few different washable bedtime pants for DS1 though, which are handy to minimise leaks and his current ones don't seem babyish to him as they do them in all sizes including adult ones, although they aren't nearly as cute as the printed ones he had before. Not sure if that kind of thing might appeal to her to wear until you think she is ready to go without.

I didn't really manage any decluttering today as there was a fair bit of ironing and a number of massive tantrums to deal with. I did Milton some bath toys though. Not really sure what is up with DS2 today as he is normally a very sunny little boy. Last time he was like this, I thought he was teething and gave Nurofen, which seemed to help a bit but then he woke up with a burst eardrum a few days later and I felt really sorry that I hadn't realised sooner and got antibiotics. I hope he doesn't get that regularly like I did as a child. It's so painful; like labour pain but worse as it's constant and such a tiny inflexible hole! Since then he keeps saying "ear 'urtin'" every time he sees a Nurofen bottle or syringe, because he likes the taste, so it's hard to tell when he really has some pain.

Hello everyone!

that I hope you hear something about the job soon.

I've had a busy day today:

Ta Das:

~ 4 LOL, including our bedding and the dog's beds.

~ Attempted to get my passport photo taken locally, it's a nightmare when the UK have different specifications than the U.S. will have to try again Saturday in a different (further) town as my local shop has a crappy camera. The online application process wouldn't accept it so got my money back.

~ Tried to find meds for DD, again, nothing around town so DH had to order it online (not prescription).

~ took dog to groomers to get nails trimmed and anal glands expressed, she hated me for that!

~ Washed jeep, dog hated that too (went through car wash - her first time and probably last time) had to vacuum it afterwards as well.

~ dyed DDs hair.

~ bathed dog.

~ Prepped dinner for tomorrow night.

~ made dinner for tonight, got lunch ready for tomorrow.

~ finally sat down for about an hour before getting in the shower.

~ got clothes out for tomorrow all ready.

Its late now, still didn't get everything done I had on my list of to dos, but that's ok.

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Morning all! May the fourth be with you

Baby-step ,no.4 for 4th March: here

Launch pad link to: missions, reminders, flight plan, daily focus etc, here!

Have a good anti-procrastination day everyone and how the feck is it Wednesday already?

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Ugh I very much need to anti procrastinate today! I have of course not kept up with the progress made on Sunday but I have done some stuff I guess. The main thing I’m procrastinating over is booking parents evening as I’m really nervous about it! Will be meeting aaaaall the teachers AND probably a load of her friends for the first time, and worried about being blamed for any lack of skill etc (because she was home ed) SIGH. DH has offered to go instead (no babysitters) but for various reasons I think it’s better if I do.

Morning everybody! Hope those with chicken pox get through it without too much trouble.

Sc glad your dd apologised, I'm trying to teach my little ones the importance of a heartfelt apology. We didn't do much apologising to each other when I was growing up (I'm not sure it was the done thing to say sorry to your dc but I don't really remember saying sorry to my parents either, things just got forgotten about with no discussion of what happened!) and I think it's a very good skill to learn (I'm still learning it )

Must get out of my warm bed and get the dc sorted. Running late already!

Morning all

Heard from job yesterday afternoon and i wasnt successful. They were very nice though and advised i apply again when they advertise in the future as this was purely a case of someone better qualified.

Lane if unsure about pox they say to put them in a warm bath

Cinera thats so funny about your ds and the nurofen. Our ds had a phase of being similar except he would clutch his stomach and say "i so sick mum" Fingers crossed your ds just fancied nurofen and his ears are ok!

Tinslette think of the laundry back log

We3 hope your little one gets a mild dose and isnt too bothered by the CP. Its going round our school but all of our have had it already (except the baby!)

Sc glad you got your apology

Willow i too feel like Mrs Large in the bath. I dont let anyone in the bathroom but dc3 and 4 will often wait for me outside the door so the can talk to me. This usually involves them posting things under the door for me to look at

🍒👋

Oh no Hazel great list, though sounds as if the hound had a bit of rough day yesterday, poor furry! (My older one hates having his glands done. It's awful because he let's out this pitiful sort of warble.)

Cineraria re: ds2 with his "ear 'urtin'"; I hope it doesn't develop in to anything too bad this time. Veggie curry was meant to be for supper (we always have a veggie night on Thurs and increasingly on a Tues too) but by the time I had finished cooking it dh had helped himself to a sandwich and dd had had a ping supper. (Obviously haven't got my timings right when it comes to cooking and longer work hours!) Soup is for lunches this week because dh and I are both trying to lose a stone before May 1st.

Yes Lane being female is crap sometimes. I am very happy that my irksome womb has been evicted (well I would be if it hadn't lead to chronic joint pain, still being investigated). Speaking of joint pain, hope you are ok this morning. And also that Cagletini isn't suffering too much!

Hope you can make the most of the laundry embargo Tinselette It certainly has been a long January and Feb with lots of challenges for everyone, never mind the odd pandemic here and there and a global environmental crisis

Hope you weren't changing bed-linen in the night KTCluck

Must have x posts with you last night Willow! Sorry but had to cackle a bit at the description of your "relaxing" bath and the attendant parade of "characters"! Especially Willow Hound adding to the chorus! I love those Mrs Large books; used to buy them for all the parents of my godchildren! Hope your ds3 is ok this morning and top marks for non-splitting hollandaise! Sorry things are so difficult re: your ds2 and school. It sounds incredibly frustrating.

The teen thing is difficult isn't it? DD went off to school with a heavy heart this morning as she has an aural maths presentation [?] which apparently involves the teacher picking any part of this year's curriculum randomly and getting the student to give a 10 minute presentation on it, in front of the class (in Fr). She was very, very stressed at the prospect.

Right, I have an hour to get the ironing lady settled in, tidy up after breakfast and get myself looking reasonably presentable to my desk. Only working six hours today so hope to do some Flying this afternoon.

Hope your ds4 is no worse this morning either We3kings!

Have a good one everybody!

Didn’t actually mean to press post then oops

Loving the spreadsheets cineraria

I’m trying to think of some regular chores DS (10, autistic, dyspraxic etc) could do on weekday mornings especially. I’m getting him into the habit of going round opening all the windows in the morning but he could definitely do a few other regular things. Just nothing with breakable stuff 😅 he does say he likes tidying but a general task of “tidy up” is too vague when we are all very messy people and the house still isn’t at the “everything has a place” stage (will it ever be?!). Nothing too chemically or dusty though as I’m not sure if that would make his eczema worse (it’s on his hands mostly. Hmm.

Also need to have a real think about how to up my maths game with DS. He was getting very enthusiastic about DD’s maths homework and worked answers out long before her 🤦‍♀️ we’ve (I’ve! Maths is MY thing so although DH enjoys it, I’m in charge 🤣) been giving him two worksheets a day, a mix between practice and gradually introducing new skills, but I think I need to keep those as mostly self guided but add in some more intensive teaching of new stuff. He could be doing a lot more and I’ve let him down by holding him back I think (for DD’s sake as she struggles so much with maths). Also need to figure out other subjects that we’ve been ignoring, and others still that he really struggles with. We’ve had over half a term of just him at home so no excuse not to increase the workload for all of us really.

Also need to find a way of supporting DD more at home but she gets virtually no homework (and in maths for example the homework doesn’t even match up with what they’re doing in class), I’m going to ask for guidance on this at parents evening.

Cagletini has dozed back off after a feed. She’s in a baby-style vest so I can’t check if the spots have developed yet!

Must stop waffling, get up, take meds, have breakfast, shower and choose something to take to do when I arrive at the course (due to buses I’ll have almost half an hour to kill).

Have a great morning everyone!

That glad you got your positive feedback, if not the job! Much better than being left hanging! Arf at the queue forming outside the bathroom door and the posting under it

Foxes my parents never apologised. It just wasn't done in their day. I'm trying not to be the same but dh finds it hard!

Morning! Disappointing about the job, That, but sounds hopeful for next time. Cineraria, I love your spreadsheets! Wish I had time to set up the same, but I fear I'd get obsessive about filling it in rather than getting anything actually done. The method of control is always more interesting to me than actually doing the job... And if I could reduce my days to a series of automated tick lists, I think I would! Hope the ears are not a problem.

Hazel, loads done there, sounds like you're really on top of the next few days. What colour is DD's hair?

Lane, don't panic! Would it help to remember that, even though you are meeting the teachers for the first time, they are also meeting you for the first time. I can't believe any teacher wants a difficult relationship with a parent, and DD has made a big transition, resoundingly well... They will not be looking to find fault with you! But I know it's hard, particularly when you fear a direct line can be drawn from oneself to one's child in terms of awkward behaviours. Been there!

Zoo, hope you are ok and the OT hasn't got up your nose again - you've gone very quiet. Lisette oh god, the washing machine conking out is my worst nightmare. I end up having to put everything in the bath and walk up and down on it, usually. Hope it's fixed soon!

DS3 recovered himself and was not seriously sick at all. Not sure what was going on there.

To Dos
☑️ DW
☑️ Dressed to shoes, hair and face
☑️ LOL x 2
☑️ S&S
☑️ Bleach end of bath tiles in family bathroom
☑️ Seal edge of shower tiles in our bathroom
☑️ More financial stuff
☑️ More writing
☑️ Clean woodwork and walls in hall - there are muddy pawprints!

Expletive, I spoke to the organisation you recommended as an OT yesterday. They were very friendly and helpful! Crossing fingers we can do something to help DS3.

I also had an unusual parenting moment on Monday - both DS3 and DD skipped off perfectly happily to Kung Fu, where they have made good friends whom they want to see. This has never happened before, other people at clubs have always been a source of stress and worry and aggravation, and there has always been a half-hour period of negotiation before they go about will they go / just this week / you enjoyed it last week / we're paid until the end of the month etc. For Kung Fu, they both trot in happily. I am so relieved.

We3, Stressy, KT, foxes, Bower, SC, 🍒🙋!

Lane not many parents would be able to home ed their dc to a point where they could (virtually seamlessly) return back to school - you should be proud - bet the teachers will be very interested to meet you too!

Whey hey re: happy Kung Fu moment Willow, looks like all of your patience and reassurance paid off!

Right, fortnightly ironing lady is here, I have emptied the dw and re-stacked, wms are on.

Have a good day one and all! May not be back on here tonight as I am joining dh who has a business dinner with someone who is bringing their other half [groan]. So "see youse" all tomorrow!

Meant to.say "hope you are ok Zoo"

And, er, just to be clear, wasn't groaning about client's other half before, was groaning about dinner itself. Last thing I feel like doing tonight. Loads of school rep stuff to do.

Note to self: school e-mails at lunch time

@Stilllivinginazoo also hope you are ok

lane since your DS likes tidying, is he able to spend a few minutes in a room making sure there's nothing in there that shouldn't be? Easy stuff, like a towel in the living room doesn't belong type of thing. And then put it in the correct room or dirty clothes etc. Or making a shelf look neat and tidy (even if it's not done to your standard).

willow DDs hair colour was supposed to be black. It's turned out a blue/purple/black and very pretty. She's happy with it so that's good.

Yesterday was a tough day in our house, DD had an appt with therapist as she has had suicidal thoughts (just found out about that). She was diagnosed with a mental health disorder (really don't want to go into details on here though, just in case). Still processing it all. Apparently able to control it with a vitamin that has been ordered as no one around here has it. Explains a lot, but means she's been suffering for a couple of years, in silence. There's no cure, so something she'll have to deal with the rest of her life.

I know this isn't exactly the right thread for the above, but thought that you lot might understand better than most.