Stepping forward in October: the new look fledgling Fly thread.

[Spreadingcudweed]

OK so maybe not new and improved exactly... but a more slimline, concentrated version!

Huge thanks to Hills for guiding us so slickly through September !

Many of us have been here forever; the thread where we (loosely) follow the Flylady housekeeping system here to combat CHAOS (can't have anyone over syndrome) with a load of chat and mutual support along the way. For that reason, we may seem cliquey, but we really aren't and all newcomers, lurkers, returnees and (intermittent) regulars are hugely welcome!

We are not posting links to the Flylady site on a daily basis anymore, just the daily baby step and flight plan, and the missions and zones on a weekly basis, but don't hesitate to ask questions about the system if you have any!

More information available here and from the launch pad here.

And borrowing heavily from Hills September introduction ... .

There are 4 levels for Flying:
-Baby steps - good for finding a routine in the tasks and getting over the perfection crippling effect
-Baby steps and missions - yep basic routine and more in depth tasks

• Baby steps, missions, and deep cleaning (if you are at that stage) - can't clean clutter so don't consider this one if you need the next level
• Flying combined with a decluttering system (kondo/unfuck etc etc) lets be honest fly lady is good for routine but not so quick with the decluttering results sometimes.

There is NO wrong or right way of doing this, it is about adapting the system to suit your life circumstances, which will be different from someone else's.

And when it all gets too much: come and take a seat by the fire in our specially adapted "naughty" corner where you can enjoy virtual and and tangible support from fellow fledglings.

Oh no I've there's so much illness about.currently! Hope your ds3 feels better soon.

Yes he was sick two weeks ago. Tbh he has been not 100% for about 4 weeks now the poor sod

Anyway. I had better wake ds1 and 2!

hills that's definitely awin if no one was murdered you are so on top of it!

SC nothing wrong with pumpkin soup!EVERYTIME I hear those words I'm transported to the days of zoolets clambering all over me to read one of their favourite books!did you ever read the pumpkin soup trilogy of picture books?beautifully illustrated and brings a tear to my eye remembering !!

Foxes I'm fit in a walking perspective(4hrs before I need food/water/a rest) but I can't run for toffee.i tried,but it appears to trigger asthma in me and not be able to breathe for wheezing put me off!!glad lunch was good!
Dani mum's food sounds good.hipe D's had better night
Cag o.m.g. Any area my house that tidy I'd think I'd walk into somebody else's place by mistake!!well done on that and getting out!

Tried talk dp about way doesnt handle D's.we are now not speaking,but he's kinda try be better with D's.hes back at work 2pm.as til after Xmas at least(he a nightmare with run up to Xmas due his childhood pre parent divorce.plus work is super short staffed and his need to do good job gets him drawn into doing extra hours) so I've accepted I'm running this round by myself.i did it before when he'd just changed job before I found out pregnant with DS so no pat leave then had emergency section followed by baby from hell who never slept/constant cry and was later diagnose chromosome issue that caused developmental delays and endless apps to proffesionals with no back up and other kids to care for too...I won't lie and did crash n burn initially but when no other options you dig deep and suck it up.
I did it then,I can do it now
Feeling pretty flat about it all but I need remember D's can't help it and whilst it tears my heart in two as he claw at me begging me to make it stop/don't let me die in throws panic attacks I'm his mum.end of.i signed up to be there for my kids whenever they need me and there I will be..

Sorry for pathetic little rant of self pity.needd ditch it somewhere before hoik big girl pants up and secure mid face (least will act like scarf these chilly mornings round nose and mouth)

Best feed the masses,the wm and remember once 2pm arrives it's easier as I'm doing it myyyyyyyyy wayyyyyy

Well done for talking about it with him though zoo. I didn’t realise DS had those issues from birth, are CAMHS aware of that and are they taking into account when assessing? Neurological differences could be a factor in his anxiety (for example one of our home ed friends presents as autistic but it’s actually a rare chromosome disorder).

I kept randomly looking into the cupboard last night 😳😇 mind you I kept doing that with the Trofast units along the landing and now they are a mess 🙄 must sort them. Still haven’t sorted the Lego at all, it’s just in massive boxes in our room! And not sure where the playmobil is going either as there are tiny sets and massive sets. DD wants some in her room but I’m not sure having it on display is the best use of Kallax space 🤔 anyway at least I now know what buckets there are to work with (8 big 8 small) not sure how many are still empty.

What did you think of strictly sc I loved Danny and Charles’ dances the best! I love Danny anyway though. DH and DS are currently watching red dwarf in fact 😍

We need to do something nice with DS this morning. Very tired though. Cagletini slept maybe 11-4.30 but then was wide awake for a while, just chattering away to me in bed, I did wonder if the milk had somehow turned to red bull 😣😂

Need the pointy stick please. Went to bed a bit too late and took meds late so now in dozy mode. Thank goodness it is half term. I am still really tired might ask GP to do bloods in case a defiency.

I’ve sorry to hear job not going well. I have been wondering whether to go for that other job but want to see if Vol. redundancy is on the cards and take it and maybe ,just maybe retire! I am liking the idea more and more as the stress levels go up.
Cags great achievement that cupboard is very tidy. I wish I had a cupboard for coats. We just have an old rack in hall at bottom of stairs and where the front door is near. We can’t get out of there at present because of school bags. Going to take some into school this afternoon as it is ridiculous to think H&S risk in my house.

Planning to do housework this morning then go to school to sort stuff this afternoon. It is open all week for staff!

Spoke to DD last night. She was at airport. Sad to say goodbye to her and had a little sob after I said final goodbye. She was flying to Mumbai then onto Bangkok she should be there by now. Might need a gin or two today.

Plan for today
Clean kitchen
Unload dishwasher.
Sweep floor and mop.
Clean out corner cupboard. Ready for packing up kitchen!

Boudoir
sort out pile of clothes
Make bed
Pile of magazines by bed.

Anything else I can be bothered to do after that. Pointy stick please. Still in 🛌 😲

ta da
ds to school vaguely on time
1 load of uniform through the drier
feed teenager and beasts
emergency bugger I can't adult properly wash - through washer and into dryer
20mins soak in epsom bath
fresh bread in bread machine.

Now onto a little revision - although helpfully next door has builders in and the thumping is hurting my head so may decamp shortly. Just an hour and half worth of computer stuff to do first. Sods fucking law.

Ds is in trouble when he gets home, he deliberately stopped me from going to sleep because he was pissed off. So today I am furious and on the war path. God help him when he gets home because I will be getting to the full extent of the bottom of the homework situation and it WILL be rectified!! And then we will deal with the small issue of the collection of dishes and state of his room.....

Beware of the angry productive ta da list later.

No pointy stick bower but I have a handy hockey stick to drag you out into the chilly world of doing stuff. Seriously though take it bloody easy and stop beating yourself up for having a gentle day. You bloody need it sometimes!!!!!! And making yourself feel guilty for what your body needs only causes you more problems!!!

Oh yummy thank you Hills.

Re DS and homework situation. Can you just let him get into trouble. Do they have detention for no homework. We used to but don’t now. Some teachers rant some don’t bother. I rarely give it ( due to subjects) and give those that have done it rewards. Positive reinforcement!

You could ring the school and tell them. Hopefully teacher may react. Save your sanity.

Coffee break:

Huge sympathies Hills I have just surveyed the catastrophe that is dd's room. (Go in there as little as humanly possible tbh except for bed changing.) Clothes, damp towels, mouldy tea in mugs, chocolate wrappers discarded on floor next to waste bin. And there I was feeling chuffed that I was up to date with the washing for once! Bloody hell! Half of it is in her room .

Good luck with the revision! And meet you with an angry ta da list later

I can't bear to wield the pointy stick when you are tired and missing your DD Bower. Going in to school for the afternoon during the holidays is more than sufficient today

Cag re : Strictly, DD loves Danny too! But she and English friends are supporting Joe Large-Internet-Presence person! I won't elaborate about what I thought of the DO results because I have been reprimanded on here before about giving the game away for those watching on record. (Think that was Bake Off but still!). Suffice to say, there must have been technical stuff that I don't understand that factored in to judge's decisions because I was gob-smacked at outcome!

Zoo I can't run for toffee either! That sounds like such a stressful and lonely time when ds was born. . Don't feel qualified to comment about sn matters but agree with Cag about assessment/support etc.

Oh your poor lad I've four weeks of feeling rough is no fun at all, for you or him.

Thibking of you this morning Sass!

Waves to everyone else!

Ds does not give a shit about detentions. School have made it the parents problem with the home school agreement. I have to sign to say he has done the homework. No signiture and I get the grief at parents' evening. It is a totally shit situation tbh. Means they can tick boxes with ofsted. Ds calls school a concentration camp where no one gives a shit about student welfare. tbh I don't actually think he is far wrong when it comes to the state of education. Tick the box, fit the mold, smile and conform, don't think for yourself.... I have opinions about education in the UK. They are no nice or favourable.

Oh Joe Sugg is the sweetest! He is adorable I love him too. His Charleston the other week was great.

Hope DH’s tests go ok sass

I think DD should do her own washing now sc (IMHO) mine do their own, if they run out of clean socks it’s their own problem! I do remind them though and we are going to have set days as part of our new routine (eg DD Monday and Thursday type thing). Or you could compromise and wash her uniform/riding stuff, and she could be in charge of casual/weekend stuff?

I snuck out for a bit as we needed nappies as yesterday’s are far too big. Just down the road to Asda. Sneaky Maccy D breakfast :o and also managed to get myself some clothes, finally. I was literally down to a few pairs of trousers and tops, I hate clothes shopping. So just got some basics and a shirt dress thing all suitable to feed in. She was asleep when I got in so I had a long shower. Don’t feel quite as refreshed as I hoped though as my tooth hurts (the one that’s coming out next week though so not worried really)

I want a lazy afternoon! DH is working.

I’m with you on that hills

Where is steg?

Survived quick shop at da foods leaving dd2 in charge(she's pretty good with D's when has to be)
All in car to wilko .D's meltdown so I had sit in back with him

Hills totally agree some school one size fits all.thankfully dd2 school motto is every child an individual reminss me must do lil ok school placement there later

Right I need lunch!!

Lunch break:
CAG Aye I agree, and dd did her own washing during the summer, but she doesn't have a lot of time during term time (and doesn't actually wear many other clothes than uniform or riding kit then) and I suppose I'm at fault because I like having all washing tasks done and dusted by supper time (there are a huge number of stairs between basement where wms are located and dd's bedroom so washing logistically a right pita!) but I suppose she could do hers at night. But combining with piles of hwk? I dunno! Sometimes it's hard enough to fit in time for her to stop and eat a decent meal! I do usually refuse to wash any laundry that isn't delivered to ground floor! Today is an exception because she has let it piled up so much (sigh). Need to reiterate rules!

Hills agree and hate to say it it is perhaps even worse in some aspects over here with DC being pushed to study a much narrower breadth of subjects too. In the "French" education model, they have an idea of the perfect model student, and then negatively compare all RL students to that. Yes it's rigorous but it's restrictive and conformist in the extreme too. Hwk is a shared enterprise between school and parents (I don't totally disagree with that policy tbh). I would be totally pissed off though if they dumped total responsibility for hwk on parents and can see how a pupil would totally interpret that as "well school don't bother, so why should I?" So understand your frustration. Ultimately, it's the school's remit to educate.

All I have done this morning is "work" work and stupidly get involved in Brexshit threads. Now for boring choring!!

SC boring choring.so apt

Been busy on here today!

I've been working all day, dh just gone to get the dc and I'm meant to be doing the housework quickly but I made instead oops.

The plan is to get at least some of the home bleugh done. The bins have been done already we don't really need to hoover-

Ta da
Changed towels etc
Washing on
Dishwasher on

To do
Strip bed
Mop
Dust

Hmm ...I must be forgetting something!

Definitely reiterate the rules! Do you think she could compromise by doing her stuff on the weekends maybe?

I’m bored and stuck under a baby. She keeps crying every time I move so fuck it, she can stay asleep and I can stay still.

Wow tidy cupboard Cag . Glad you managed to get time to start talking to DH. Sorry to hear job not good Ive, going back to your old place sounds promising?

foxes, I am a month into a new exercise regime. Was relatively fit before but am getting fitter. I have to say though that this does lead to me walking round with injuries so am never too sure of how to find the balance . Back later as am at gymnastics!

i won the homework argument!!! technically i cheated and brought in the ultimate threat but all homework for tomo is done and homework that was supposed to be submitted today is currently being done.

No teenagers were hurt in this achievement but the internet was turned off.

bbl I have a house to discover before work men tomo and food stuffs to sort... and people to try not to murder

Loss internet /devicesdoes it every time herehills you gotta do what you gotta do
Well done!

Neglected most chores in favour stroll in autumn sunshine with zoolets.minir wobbles from D's twas pleasant

Tomorrow we need go town.this needs military precision planning to minimise meltdown esp as discovered a bloody street fair will be on all week from 10-30/11.we are aiming get in there early and be head out by then!!non avoidable due to outgrown school stuff and need get few bits for lil zoo birthday Monday
I will either be buzzing or jibbering on return!!

Hi, have done kitchen bar mopping floor, will do that before bed. Corner cupboard half way through. Didn't go to school in the end because I didn't have enough sorted to take back in. I did the sorting instead which is why cupboard half way.So sorted into three piles...things I will need, things for charity shop and things for friends kids/grandkids. Stuck boxes together and counted or made puzzles. Small pile to take back to school and will drop others at charity shop on the way tomorrow. Took longer than i thought.
Had some rest time by doing the puzzle I am on. It is so hard. I will be really annoyed if there are loads of pieces missing as it is taking ages because lots of pieces look like others. Wish DD was here to help me.
Tonight's quiz has been cancelled so quite nice to stay home.I will try and sort a RBC from school i collected last week.Hoping most is for the bin! I have brought in a barrow of logs and have fire on as it is quicker than shredding.I am sure that cat smiled at me when she sat on stool right in front.She was in and out with me to get them. Henny is back in after getting out three times today.Houdini!

I see in main thread that someones DH has died.Four kids, how awful. Poor family he was only 37.

Hills try being on the end of it. So many staff don't agree with some of the changes but we are sometimes forced into stuff.
We have to go in earlier now and don't get morning break, lots working half lunch.I work most of lunch and don't get paid at least TAs getting paid.If I don't do it I fall behind and have to do it after school or at home.Also some classes finishing at 12.15 and others starting at 12.45 if you unlucky you are doing both. Staff are under pressure, kids are under pressure and they wonder why MH is increasing.DUH!

Foxes REMAKE BED! i need to do mine too.It has been well aired today.

Yeah to internet down could do with that myself sometimes.

Feel well rested now so bed early and might go to school first thing. Gets it over with not staying more than two hours.Promise.

Oh I hear you bower There is a reason why I did not go back to complete teacher training many years ago and it has only got worse...

Zoo oh I used a far worse threat than the internet - I told his father he was behind his homework and would be taking any incomplete homework to his house. His dad rubbed his hands with glee controlling twat Ds went - 'no way in hell' and is working on getting all done before he goes... [evil grin]

If you were my allergy friendly pumpkin pie recipe that I used last year, where would i have put you?

Ta da cont'd/..
'work' work 👍
home bleugh (including extra thorough s & s of bathroom) 👍 (quicker home bleugh than normal though as dh away for long trip which always means less tidying)
packing up of parcel and several cardsWIP
continue laundry 4 loads 👍
make pasta sauce 👍
make soup 👍
baking? NOPE
make apple compote with last bag of apples NOPE
put away clean laundry 👍
1 hr in boudoir 30 mins (got distracted watching parliament telly)
30 mins power walk/exercise 👍 (similar to Zoo lovely autumnal weather)
French study 👍
start new creative project 👍
made appts 👍

V unusually, feel relatively chuffed with achievements today! Did NOT declutter another art cupboard drawer though!

Well done for winning the hwk battle Hills!
Aye it is the system that is the problem Bower bird not the individual teachers. Well done re paper decluttering!

In safe place where any other missing items are lurking hills
not remotely helpful
That is deffo a good shout deploying a twat dad threat(assume this is near end of /rare used part of your arsenal?!)

Bower its very sad the situation teachers are in now.bloody politicians wouldn't tolerate such work conditions(don't get me started there on snowflake entitled behaviour😤)sending hugs and hoping early retirement will be an option for you

Tada
(Yes there was a little done today)
Bins out/recycling out
Everyone fed incl pets
Various challenges with D's and dp
lunch
Washing(2 loads.we now have clean,dry towels!!)
Walk with zoolets
Fix oven door (dropping in hinges)

Made fish pie with carrot,swede and potato topping and green beans for lil ones (D's actually ate some.whoo Hoo!)
Wash up
Sweep kitchen floor
S+s bathroom
Tray button mushrooms,squash,sweet potato and peppers cooking along with sausages and rosemary and garlic potato wedges for dd2 and I
Start write plan of attack for town trip tom,incl times shops open and what's needed to try and make relatively unscathed trip!!