Part 2/ June's arrived too soon! Catch up with the Fledgling Fly thread ... .

[Scoopofchaff]

... continuing from previous thread here.

Sorry for the novel folks

Didn't get more than 1 load done yesterday as forgot I had washed bleachy old towel the last load and the machine needed a cleaning load before i washed my black uniform .

About to go grab some breakfast and shove ds out the door. At work and then it is a drive across the hills day so very late back.

I don't feel like I have,but thanks for the advice hills her tutor is keeping an eye on her as school have finally taken on board she's isolating from everyone now

Bathrooms wiped down
Off to school
Need write change meds form for lil zoo
Walk home,meet do then go get her for hospital app for eyes(as attendance is poor it's agreed at least to get her registration points were poss)

I would chase the assessment. The fact that you are fighting with her and you are giving her consequences means you have got this. I don't think you will convince dd2 to change completely, (I never managed it with ds, but I got him to understand there were consequences and that if he did the thing he would suffer them so we found an uneasy compromise.) But you have got this because you are handling it, there is just not winners in this war that you need to keep fighting. Sorry that is terribly depressing

Morning!

Ta daas for today so far...

Swish and swipe,
Laundry on the line now drying,
Dishes washed and kitchen swished and swiped,
Daily mission done,
15 minutes of de-cluttering done.

To do...

Put laundry away once its dry,
Ring hospital to check on my waiting list,
Mop kitchen and bathroom,
Proper clean of bathroom,
Get hair cut.

Does anyone find that they end up with bugger all time for bigger projects because they are too busy keeping on top of the everyday stuff? I was planning to paint the back of the house today/tomorrow, but I honestly feel like I won't be able to fit it in!

Yes exactly that steg all my energy and time goes on (barely) treading water! I still have no idea how we are going to move in less than a month as it takes so much just to not let the laundry and washing up pile up.

The theory is that by getting everything properly unpacked and sorted in the new home, there will not be so much treading water to do, as everything will have a place! Famous last words the main thing is though we ARE getting rid of a heck of a lot of stuff before we move, so that really should help a fair bit.

Hoping that we can get some boxes moved over to the new house today though which will free up some space. We’ve all got fuckloads of laundry to put away (see I’m not even keeping up with that really) so planning to tie that in with decluttering the clothes - they have plenty of outgrown/worn out stuff. DH actually chucked some t shirts recently and I definitely have a few more things I can ditch.

Relatives coming today though, I’m going to meet them all at sports club and then I’m hoping that they are willing to help at least distract the baby while we get on with stuff, or if they want to see the new house we can move some boxes over in the car. Rather than us just being entertainment for the day.

Zoo I agree the assessment needs chasing. Also in the meantime it might be worth looking up strategies for dealing with PDA (pathological demand avoidance) - it’s not something I know about myself and it doesn’t get diagnosed in the U.K. much, but the tips could be useful anyway. But she really does seem to need assessing for ASD if things are causing so much issue. It’s so hard getting girls assessed. :(

Right I need to get the baby sorted and then get the bus down (don’t want to risk walking alone, and I’ll be getting a lift back)

Sorry everyone having such stressful times. My dc are still really little so I have all this to come!

Ta da
Washing on
Dishwasher emptied and loaded again
Dinner in slow cooker - some strange leftovers concoction basically beef, tinned tomatoes, gravy and veg and herbs - hope it's nice! (One of the carrots was mouldy I threw it away but now wondering if the ones I put in were mouldy too oops!)
Opened up greenhouse to let some air in
Took rubbish out
Decluttered fridge included eating dh chocolate he shouldn't have left it in there!

To do
Clean microwave - I've just discovered how disgusting it was haven't properly looked in it for a while.
Finish daily routine
15 minutes decluttering living room
Hotspots living room
Declutter bag purse car
Pop to shops for few bits and ds needs new shoes desperately
Pay for dd summer swimming course
Renew library books and possibly pick up new one if I get time
clean car
wet Vax living room
Meant to be picking up dd friend present but really don't think I'll have time
Wrap my dad's present / write card
Ironing
Hang washing out
Pay dd nursery fees
Meal plan / food shopping online

I think there's more but I can't remember. I'm doing that I've got so much to do so I'll sit here and procrastinate thing...

Ta da
Cleaned microwave
Watered plants at front
Dishwasher on again
Finished daily routine
Paid for dd swimming
Paid dd nursery
Cleaned car
Written my dad's birthday card
Hung washing out
Meal plan and online food shop

To do
Add one thing to food shop I forgot
Ironing
Wrap present
Wet Vax
Renew library books
Swish and swipe downstairs loo
Pop to shops
Declutter bag purse car
Declutter in living room
Hotspots living room
General big tidy

Woohoo DH is just taking the second lot of boxes over to the house! I took one lot first and gave family the tour, now I’m feeding baby while he goes. It’s nice seeing the house through the eyes of others as they keep saying how much bigger and nicer it is etc :) any doubts I first had of “is it going to be any bigger/better” are well and truly gone now. :)

cag

Hello everyone!
Had phone call this morning to go over to Dd's as Dgs10 had upset tummy and she's too busy to take any time off.
When I get there, she says she thinks he might be "putting it on a bit" and to see what I think while she's getting ready. So we had the " too much information " conversation.
I found out that he was at a friend's after school and had basically been eating loads of sweets and drinking Coke. They were allowed to a corner shop and the boy had spent his pocket money. So that's why he's got upset tummy. Anyway!

Ta da
Feed dog and cat
Empty dishwasher.
Dark wash in
Swish and swipe
Weekend Shop - plus bits for Dd - plus bits for relative.
Vacuum Downstairs.

Ta da
Not doing any more just Evening meal. Too hot! Plus it can wait!

Don't overdo it Fellow Fledglings!

Grabs Banana Thanks Zoo and and sits in naughty corner!

I emailed dd2 tutor ask a chat
I've just got off the phone(he rang me once got home-lives different county)
Anyhoo,he thinks she's a normal teen with attitude and lower social skills which is normal for some and suggested after-school clubs and he try and encourage her do in school clubs to build confidence and friendships and put her forward for a social anxiety group...
I not sure what to say to any of that so I just agreed to give it a try.
I've had a lousy day,I'm exhausted.still feel rubbish and do has reverted to twat mode as he's done three nights on the trot(sleeps on site but not well) and is tired and irritable
I've been moaned and had snippy comments about being "horse faced" (I'm tired and don't feel well I don't have energy to plaster on a smile and do the whole stepford wifey bullshite)and the rows about summer holidays have begun.i have very bad anxiety which means I cannot eat out of my own environment and become very stressed in new places and stay away from home as well as travelling,so going away means 3 days living on my nerves and eating tictacs and precious little else
I've manage one holiday,2summers ago and it near killed me as straight after his mum got I'll and died and I never recovered eating again before I was chasing around after him and then help him organise her effects/funeral.hes snapping he will work if I don't hurry up and pull it together as why have time off if it's just another summer wasted.hes cleared off to bed.zoolets are at choir and I will been crying
I am so fed up.its been a rubbish week with dd2 playing up,feeling lousy,lil zoo keeping me up late with her tummyaches and I can't take anymore...

Sorry,I really needed to let that out somewhere
Ignore this daft old bag and carry on!!

You've got a lot on your plate Zoo! With lil Zoo having tummy problems and the older one being stroppy, while worrying about her not socialising at school. Your not feeling well yourself, which can make you feel over-whelmed with everything. Arsy Dh doesn't help matters! Might be a daft question but can you try to get more help with the anxiety? Being in a constantly anxious state can be really draining on you.
And, you must be doing something right, keeping all the balls in the air, so don't knock yourself.
I'm sure our little thread is the perfect place to vent. Try to be kind with yourself, you deserve it!

zoo hang in there lovely , deep breaths and all that, rant away whenever you feel like it!

Evening all!

Zoo sorry you are having such a stressful time. I totally totally sympathise with how draining and anxiety-provoking teenage angst can be. I was actually just about to write (literally!) everything that Honkywonky and Foxes have just said! Take it steady

Honkywonk I hope your dgs is feeling a bit chirpier tonight bless him

How EXCITING Cag about actually moving boxes in! Whee hee! Whoo hoo! So happy for you x!!

Impressive list as ever Foxes and sometimes ad hoc cooking concoctions turn out to be the most successful suppers of all!

Stegosauraus
Does anyone find that they end up with bugger all time for bigger projects because they are too busy keeping on top of the everyday stuff?

The answer to that is yes, yes, and thrice yes! (And I only work approx 18 hrs a week and only have one teen. ) Tbh, I have been on this thread for years and it is only now that I am getting to the true decluttering part. The way I see it is there are three categories of domestic choring (1) all the daily necessities such as cooking and laundry and dishwashing etc which are endles (2) then there is cleaning and to an extent organizing also endless and then there is (3) decluttering which is NOT the same as organizing and is a distinct activity all on its own. I know Flylady valiantly tries to integrate Flying in to the rest of one's daily routine, but most of the time for me, it ain't happening and when it does, something else has to give!

But having said all of that, when dc are small, you never have the big chunks of time available that you once did (or will have once they get more independent) and so the odd 15 mins here and there really is the best way to go (imho) but people generally need a lot longer to tackle a really overstuffed wardrobe or art cupboard or pantry or similar. So small step by small step, drawer by drawer, shelf by shelf, is the only possible way when you have young 'uns I think. That's what I have found anyway; others may have different strategies! And I know Flylady's theory (although I haven't quite got to level of testing it out thoroughly yet ) is the more one declutters, the quicker it takes to tackle categories 1 & 2 .

Safe travelling Hills and Bowerbird!

Waves to I've and everyone else!

Hope everyone has as restful a weekend as possible in this heat!

Bit cream crackered tonight. Sadly, shopping for swimwear with dd this morning was not the mother-daughter bonding moment I had imagined it might be .

She is still in post-exam "hyper" state and being rather stroppy and difficult frankly. Brimming with energy and not quite knowing what to do with it! And extremely sensitive to any perceived sleight; very much a walking on eggshells situation.

She has gone to swimming and sleepover with friends tonight so thankfully dh and I have a bit of peace (horrible though that sounds; it is nice to have a wee break from the merry go round of angst that is adolescence). Only trouble is, dh and I feel so exhausted after a long week, and I feel so irritated and drained by the effort it took to keep my temper with dd this morning, that I don't really have any energy to profit from her absence! Picking her up at 11 am tomorrow so maybe if I get up early I can get more done ... .

Ta da:
walk furry at crack of sparrows in the cool
empty dw
downstairs was cleaned thoroughly (not by me) and anti-mouse patrol done again with preventative Dettol (by me)
carry dirty laundry downstairs
empty overnight washing and hang up on terrace
fold towels
take dd shopping (sort of success but rather stressful)
took dd for lunch (slightly more conciliatory [smile)
delivered colleague birthday present to office
wrapped parcel ready for post
went to PO/bought Lottery ticket
sorted present for sleepover parent
dropped dd and another friend off on other side of town
cooked chana masala for tomorrow
sorted degree certificate (finally)
sorted card for nephew
2 x loads more laundry
cooked frozen salmon steaks with cous-cous salad for tonight for dh and me
walked furry again with dh - still very warm and dropped thank you card off at friend's for hosting us last night

Heigh ho! Can't believe it is the end of the month. You've all done brilliantly Fledglings!

Zoo meant to add that I think summer holidays can be a very stressful and anxiety provoking time for many people and it must be even tougher with anxiety too. I'm so sorry your dp is making horrible comments because that is going to add to the sense of stress and pressure you must be feeling even more. Would it be poss for you to go to gp and get some help for yourself for once because you are always doing it for others

Well June went quickly didn't it?

Well done Fledglings for Flying high throughout!

Last links of the month coming up!

And Toostressy will be about soon tonight/tomorrow to start new thread!

Tally-hoooooo!!!

*

Baby step no. 30 for Saturday 30th June is here. It's actually quite a good one about checking the calendar for the month ahead, spying any forthcoming birthdays and prepping for them, so you don't have to make special trips for cards and presents when the time comes!

Saturday will be our last day in Zone 5 (if you do zone work at weekends that is!) : The Living Room, Den, Family Room (June 24-30). Spend 15 mins a day decluttering this area (and/or do a mission!).

If you are at the stage where you have finished decluttering Zone 5, here is the [[http://www.flylady.net/d/zones/detailed-cleaning-zone-5/
detailed cleaning list]] for the sitting room etc.

No missions for Saturday because it is the weekend!

Saturday's daily focus is family fun.

The monthly habit for June is keeping hydrated by drinking lots of water.

A summary of the above (which should update itself daily) can be found in the flight plan here.

*

Zoo what you should say next time is, we are having major problems with her obsession and abnormal behaviour and it is know that child on the spectrum and other behavioural issues will be ok in school and cause major problems at home. This is something that needs sorting and I don't think that the solutions you are offering are sufficient for the wider picture. Schools will avoid testing due to a funding issue if diagnosis happens. You WILL need to fight like crazy to get anything done. And I would recommend the GP route again.
How much does the other half know about the issues wrt DD2 and lil zoo? would he back you and take on the battle a bit for you?

Sorry you are feeling so ill, have you any closer to finding the answers about why and what might help?

I have the rages. People are so sodding peopley and they are more peopley when the weather gets hot. I don't want to be with dealing with people. Except I am have to and world war 3 is about to kick off. God help us all this weekend.

DSS came round earlier in a company van - turns out employees are actually encouraged to use it (free advertising really) so he was fine to take more stuff over for us. As well as more boxes (there’s about 20 over there now) he took the two tall trofast frames (we had basically emptied them anyway and will be getting new buckets at Ikea) and the dining chairs. Table is such a mess we can’t eat at it anyway! 😳 Was tempted to get the table over there too but had no idea where to put all the crap currently on it...

Zoo I’m astounded by DP’s hypocrisy, seeing as he tends to opt out of being a dad/partner when his anxiety/depression flares up? 🙄

Oh goody. Two puking children. Marvellous.

Baby is now in with me in case she pukes too. DD1 felt dodgy immediately after eating the chicken we had at dinner (one of those ready to roast things with a coating on the skin), DS was fine with it, although didn’t eat much of the skin either, so not sure if it’s that or a bug. I feel fine, other than being immensely anxious of course

Aaaaand the baby puked. All over me. 🤦‍♀️🤢

Cag

Ds3 has been up since 230

The wise old elf is pissing me right off

Nanny Plum is way cooler.

Cagletini hasn’t been sick again but the other two have, several times overnight 😣

DH and I still fine 🧐

Sorry you have puking kids cag
Hope you got some more sleep Ive

I am awake, caffinated off to paint a ceiling...