On cruise and kids so ungrateful and bored

[Fishnchips22]

On our first ever week long cruise, ship is amazing, loads to do. Family of four, kids are 19 and 12. They’ve enjoyed some
of it but now can’t be bothered to get up in the morning, spend loads of time on phones, haven’t done the pool/slides etc. DH pretty lazy too, so unless I organise stuff we don’t do anything. I’m so frustrated, last day today and I’m off doing my own thing cos they can’t be bothered. I’m just so fed up, it was a very expensive holiday and I’ve had a crap year with losing a parent and just wanted some lovely family time. My 12 year old DD just can’t be bothered, despite being blown away by the ship when we first boarded. I went to a show last night on my own as none of them fancied it. And just had lunch on my own as they were still in bFeel like holidaying on my own in future and saving my money! I just feel they’re so ungrateful. Does anyone else have this?

meant to say still in bed today at 11.30 🙄

How have you managed to not lose your rag at them?

Maybe tell them you want their share of the trip costs as you aren't having your money wasted.....

I don’t know, aren’t holidays for relaxing and doing nothing? Maybe you all have different expectations of holidays to each other. You could sit down with them and all choose a couple of things to do as a family and book them like some excursions?

You chose a cruise because it was what you wanted to do. You spent the money on it.

I bet neither of your children would have chosen a cruise with loads of oldies, given the chance to decide themselves.

How crap for you! Glad to hear you went off to to a show and lunch, and yes completely understand your feelings of wanting to holiday alone in future!

Could it be everyone is a bit tired and overwhelmed by the new environment? I'd save reading the riot act for your DH though, as kids get older it's natural for them to distance a bit but don't understand your DH excuse unless he's completely shattered or utterly disengaged.

Why? They didn't decide on going on a cruise, the OP did.

Surely the whole point and appeal of a cruise is that you don't have to plan anything, and people can do whatever they want?

I do understand but tbh sounds quite normal esp for those slightly awkward In-between ages. I think expecting gratefulness is setting yourself up for failure but you never know in the future they might talk fondly if it! Try and enjoy and take the small wins 💐

Why do they have to do what you fancy doing? If they want a lie in leave them to it?

I would love the peace and quiet to do my own thing but I think I'm still knee deep in young children.
Make the best of it OP. At least you know now that cruises probably don't work for everyone.

Surely it’s their holiday too and if they want to loaf about why can’t they?

TBH a cruise would be my idea of hell. It’s not going to be everyone’s dream holiday. Maybe they are not cruise people.

Don't know and 19y/o who'd enjoy this sort of cruise. Their best chance is to befriend a couple of crew members and join their parties.

It’s a bit late now but we always discuss what ever one wants to do on holiday eg trips and the every day make sure we do something everyone wants to do. My kids are little so can’t be left by themsleves but they some time choose kids club, this means some times an adult will do stuff by themsleves.

Thing is though some people like to chill and relax and that’s what they want from a holiday not being on activities all the time. I think you have to accept they want some down time but the beauty of a cruise is you can easily go off and do your own thing. One of the reasons why we can’t holiday with some of our relatives is that they get pissed off if we just want to sit down and chill and can’t let us be.

We went on a cruise holiday last year and had a riot. It was a brilliant holiday. We all went with the right attitude though.

That's such an old fashioned view that kids should be grateful. It was your choice to go not theirs. I would be saving my irritation for my lazy husband not my children.

This maybe the problem.
As a grandma myself I wouldn't want a cruise with the family- and I'd hate to have to get up early on holiday

Why is the right way to enjoy a holiday your way? I never got the cruise attraction.

If I am in holiday I very well may stay in bed till noon and party late, why not it's holidays. Do they enjoy shows at other times? A lot of what I see in social media is mediocre performances of well hacked usuals, which is great if it's your bag but would be my and my children's idea of hell. Sorry op.

It took me LOADS of full holidays trying to ram everything in before I realised what I like from holidays is lying in bed, lots of phone time, nice food/coffees, and experiencing new things in small bursts 😂 Good on them to figure it out early! (But probably don't book another cruise if you/they don't think it's worth it!)

If you’re going to lunch and shows alone it sounds more like a DH issue? Where is he?

My teens like to sleep in and lounge around on holiday which is fine. Sounds like a cruise wasn’t the right family holiday which is a shame but I’m. It sure it makes the kids ungrateful. What’s your DH doing?

Presumably the 19yo could have stayed home....

You chose to go on a cruise. I think your expectations for 12&19yos are way off.
Maybe going to the pool, but slides?

And I am not sure what is wrong with sleeping in on a holiday.

Cruises are not for everyone. If you wanted a more active holiday - I’d have booked something different.

Perhaps the 19 year old didn't realise they'd have the passive aggressive "You should be grateful!" thrown at them because they wanted to lie in.

😂👯