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Original poster

Grandson was lost

151 replies

Thistlelass · 16/08/2022 00:44

Just returned from a family holiday abroad which included 3 grandparents. Two children in the party, currently age 5 and 6. My son is the father and was with his wife. I have marked mental illness and do experience ongoing anxiety.

So one evening we were all enroute to the children's entertainment area. The Hotel was a large one and there was also entertainment going on in the grounds that night, including fireworks.
Let's cut a long story short. The 5 year old boy went missing. Now this was not for long but the what ifs just horrify me.
So I wonder what the views of other parents might be.

OP posts:
MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 16/08/2022 00:46

I can't imagine anyone would feel anything but anxious if a child went missing.

NeedToLeaveNow · 16/08/2022 00:46

The view of what?

What are you actually asking for?

mattressspring · 16/08/2022 00:48

So I wonder what the views of other parents might be.

What do you mean views?

Are you looking for people to slate the parents?

Why would anyone have views about a child being missing from their family for a short time?

Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 16/08/2022 00:48

It’s not clear what your asking. Obviously everyone/anyone would be concerned if a young child was missing.

I wonder if you need more context or to be more specific with your question.

TinaYouFatLard · 16/08/2022 00:50

My view is that it’s easy to lose kids for a short period of time. I imagine most of us have done it at some point. It’s terrifying at the time but the vast, vast majority of the time there is no harm done.

Hungryharriet · 16/08/2022 00:51

Just be thankful that he was found quickly. There's no need to dwell on the 'what ifs,' you'll only feed your anxiety.

Summerfun54321 · 16/08/2022 01:09

It’s a wake up call. We all go through life having near misses that give us a kick up the arse to be more careful. A one off incident is fine, if they’re losing their 5 year old every other weekend that’s bad parenting. Sometimes when there are too many responsible adults around (like 3 grandparents) it can get confusing who’s actually keeping an eye on the children.

calmlakes · 16/08/2022 01:11

My view is that loosing a child is very stressful.
However the huge majority of dc are very quickly found.
It is extremely rare for a dc not to be found in time safe and well.

Monty27 · 16/08/2022 01:15

It was all ok in the end. It's over. I understand it was upsetting for a short time.
All's well that ends well 💐

Aquamarine1029 · 16/08/2022 01:15

I don't understand what your question is. Losing a small child, even for 30 seconds, is a horror for any conscientious parent.

ladydimitrescu · 16/08/2022 01:17

View of other parents? Are you wanting us to criticise your son and his wife?
Just be thankful all was ok.

Changechangychange · 16/08/2022 01:17

What “other views” are you expecting? Do you think anyone is going to say they love it when their children go missing?

Alex Drake · 16/08/2022 01:33

My 3 year old disappeared for 5 - 10 mins when we were on holiday in Minorca. Bloody terrified the life out of me.

He ran from the dining room when we were having breakfast towards the kids play park, but when we got there, he was nowhere to be seen. We were also on a cliff!

I swear my hair started to turn grey that very minute, terrified!

Turned out he was hiding from us, a lovely Spanish lady saw him in a bush and alerted us.

Not sure what the OP post is really about, I've posted just to confirm that it does happen! Pesky kids and their lack of hazard perception!

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 16/08/2022 01:42

It's the absolute worst feeling, it's like time slows down and a minute seems like an hour .
I think the majority of parents can empathise with that.

Vecna · 16/08/2022 01:44

I suspect OP is anxious about the 'what ifs' and just wants to discuss it.

OP, I don't think it does good to dwell on it. All the potential variables don't matter. It happens. Often. It turned out fine.

Tiswa · 16/08/2022 02:16

These things happen. My mum still remembers the time I wandered off to the Toy Shop

NumberTheory · 16/08/2022 02:19

Things do go wrong sometimes, especially when the normal routine has been changed and you’re in a new place doing new things. It is good that very, very few of those goings wrong result in anything tragic.

While he was missing parents (and you, and anyone else who loves him, and most likely him too) would obviously be anxious. But once he’s found the what ifs become irrelevant, you just have the what happened. Of the millions of similar incidents every year, for almost all of them the only negative outcome is the after effects of the upset and concern.

It’s important not to get things out of proportion.

unkownone · 16/08/2022 02:24

I think you're best not to dwell on it. I actually lost my 5 year old for 5 hours once. She walked out of school with a friend instead of catching the bus home. It was terrifying. We found out they walked into a strangers house later who dropped them home and drove off without stopping. It does no good thinking of the what ifs. We just spent a lot of time re-enforcing the child on why it wasn't acceptable and the dangers involved- and the school changed their policies so they wouldn't lose 5 year olds again!

Coyoacan · 16/08/2022 02:25

Every child gets lost at least once but it is so terrifying

HighlandPony · 16/08/2022 02:32

Kids get lost all the time. I don’t judge and I don’t tend to panic unless it’s more than about ten mins. My kids are a bit feral though so I’ve no real fears of snatching

Zonder · 16/08/2022 02:33

My view is there were 5 adults there who are all close family members. Children are slippery and it's easy to lose sight of one for a few minutes but you would hope the chance of this was really slim with 5 adults all with them.

StClare101 · 16/08/2022 02:34

Lost our four year old for five minutes at a large outdoor event. DH and I were frantic and searching. Luckily a nice family spotted him and were walking him to security when I found him. It gave him a huge fright too.

user1477249785 · 16/08/2022 02:37

Yeah we lost one of ours once at a theme park. Terrifying but thankfully brief (even if it felt like hours). Happens to most people.

user1484512193 · 16/08/2022 02:39

The fact is at some point even if you're the most vigilant person ever, you can lose your child,even if for 30 seconds. In this instance it was horrible but he was found. The end. Don't feed your anxiety

PrayTell · 16/08/2022 02:48

The fact is at some point even if you're the most vigilant person ever, you can lose your child,even if for 30 seconds. In this instance it was horrible but he was found. The end. Don't feed your anxiety

I was beyond careful with my children whenever we were out and about. My son STILL managed to get lost on holiday at a busy tourist area. He was located very quickly but it was a very scary few minutes. I didn’t dwell on it but realised I’d been very fortunate with the outcome.