I'm feeling like uni just isn't an option for our children. It's made me very sad.

[F0XCUBs]

In tears this morning. We have two bright children. One would go to uni next year. But we can't afford it. We are middle income rather than very low or high. They would get a loan but it wouldn't cover all the rent at most unis.
DH says they have to go to local uni or do an apprenticeship and that is that. DD would really like to go to a new place from where we live.
Yes I know we should have prepared for this for years, I'm sorry I really didn't know we were expected to contribute £300-500 per month! We didn't go to uni. Between us we earn about £50.000. But don't have spare money left over.
I know they could get jobs but dd1 has applied for twelve jobs in our town and not got one. She is autistic and lacks social skills so I don't think we can rely on her getting one. Especially if there are thousands of other kids applying for the same part time jobs.
How do people afford it?! It seems so unfair that we can't give them the opportunity
When DS wants to go we definitely can't afford two lots of that money

Have a good look at different unis as the accommodation cost varies a lot. There will be a way to do it.

If DH is saying they can go to a local Uni, then that's not the same as dramatically stating you can't provide them with a university education.
Most of us couldn't afford expensive unis like oxbridge.

We have about 250k equity. I hadn't thought of remortgaging. DH probably won't agree to it though

They don't want a fancy uni. Just to move away from home and live in a new place

Have you spoken to the university your DD is interested in to see if there's any additional financial assistance available to her for her autism?

Surely going to a local uni is better than not going at all? May be possibility of moving out in second year to live with friends. I'm a secondary teacher and more and more of ours are living at home and commuting.

Can you reduce outgoings or extend mortgage term? We have a child in y8 so a few years off but we are viewing it the same as when we paid nursery fees.

Even with maximum parental contribution it will be cheaper than the childcare years.

She would like a job but has been for 12 and got nowhere probably due to autism. She has no eye contact etc but is very bright

I think that the way most young people in this situation approach it is to have a year out to save, working in a fairly low paid role but living with mum and dad.

If the kids wanted to do that could you afford to support their living costs for one more year at home whilst they saved?

Could you potentially start saving something each month now? If they had a year out to save before they went, that might put you in a position to help with the last year a bit which could be really valuable for them.

My DD more or less supports herself on a minimum grant with 20hrs barwork per week, she’s at Nottingham. It’s all possible.

Lots of students commute these days because of the cost, so if you have a decent local university they certainly won't be the only one.

My DS is at Birmingham and lots of students there commute from all over the West Midlands.

They'll have the rest of their lives to live away from home. If they want uni education, they can go to one nearby. Lots of people do it around the world.

Oxford and Cambridge aren't expensive unis. They are the same fees as everywhere else but because a lot of the colleges are so wealthy, they can heavily subsidise accommodation, and often have generous book.and hardship grants.

Sorry OP I know this has sidetracked from your post.

www.gov.uk/disabled-students-allowance-dsa

If my ds wants to go to uni in 2 years he's aware he either stays local or works to supplement his loan

It's very much a thing around here to go to third level locally. No thinks it's odd.

All you can do is tell them what if anything you can afford and then they have to work out what they want
They can stay at home and get a job

If they want to go away they might have to defer for a year and save up

I would never remortgage my home for uni for my children if they had an option to stay local. sadly unless your children have exceptional talents or a strength in a very niche area then uni is not a guarantee of a good income in the way it was in the past.

im worries about affording university for my children too. They’re a way off.

In your shoes I’d say they either need to take a year out to work and save or go to a university locally. Ok that narrows their choice but it sounds like your financial situation isn’t good enough to be paying hundreds a month for them. To be fair lots of children don’t manage uni away from home anyway. I know several young people who have left uni or transferred closer to home because they actually didn’t like being away and the social aspect of uni housing.

The experience of moving away and living with others is a lovely experiment, but it’s not the be all and end all if it isn’t possible.

With cost of living and interest rate increases, we also can't afford to pay for ours to live away. If they really wanted to live away they would need to get jobs.

We have at least 5 universities which are commutable by train or car, some of them are great universities. I don't think they're in every day usually so travelling up to an hour each way should be fine.

Also degree apprenticeships are a good option, even though they're very competitive.

I never went to uni until I was in my 30's and dh hasn't either. I don't know first hand the university experience they'll be missing out on, so maybe I just have lower expectations of uni life!

to Add I would consider taking money out the house if there was a specialist course and something that would be vvv beneficial and is not possible locally.