The CDE of University Life (2019/20 cohort) - assignments, flat-hunting, Halloween and the end of their first term fast approaching

[NewModelArmyMayhem18]

Previous thread - Obvs the end of term is looming sooner for some than for others? I guess the Oxbridge posse will finish by the end of November or just into December?

Have a lovely visit.

Can't believe in a week dd'll be home. Can't wait.

Spoke to DS who was on his way to his last match of the term - he's really looking forward to coming home on Fri - says his mate who lives on the south coast has gone home the last couple of weekends - such a long way - he must be desperate for some rest!

Lincoln was very very busy. The market is good, though as the setting is so lovely.

DS seemed fine ; it is hard to know with one so taciturn!

His room was not clean, but not as bad as I had anticipated!

Hello all 👋 missed this thread. Not much to say other than DS won’t be vacatinghis room over hols, he arrives next weekend by train. He seems to enjoying uni although not socialising much. I’d love to hear from all those posters with introverted sons wether they have turned into party animals? He seems to enjoy his lectures and definitely feels he’s on the right course. Driving lessons still progressing.

Mine doesn't seem to have done shimy, no...and I think he is still lazy.

But he is house hunting with 3 other people so must have friends!

Aha! See DS still hasn’t thought about any house hunting, I’ve mentioned it twice, all I get is grunt. I’m leaving him to see what happens at the end of the 1st yr. Guess he’ll just have to get accommodation anywhere he can.

@Shimy I have one of those sons and no, I think he's not socialising very much at all. Like your son though, he seems happy.

I think he ahs picked up on the vibe that Lincoln is a bit mad. It does seem nearly everyone is sorted and he may already have missed the best stuff. Crazy. Mainly because lots of second years stay in the same house for 3rd year.

@Piggy, at least he’s looking, that’s something useful. @New On the socialising, so long as they’re happy. DS seems to go with a couple of friends to the ‘bar’, every so often. They drink very moderately, have nice conversation then return to their halls. This level of socialising seems to be enough for him.He hasn’t seemed interested in joining societies which is a worry but there’s still nextyr so fingers crossed.

Piggy & New are your ds’s enjoying their courses? I was worried about that but DS seems quite, shall I say ‘taken’, with his. That’s one weight off the mind. I do feel really sorry for the dc I hear about who have found their degree not what they expected. A Very disappointing and stressful time for them.

DD has had a message from a flatmate telling her that her door is unlocked! She needs to phone accommodation tomorrow to flag this up.
There is a key card access into their building, then another key card access door onto their corridor - which I hope and imagine only the right keys will allow access for.
The individual rooms can be left unlocked so they can come and go from the kitchen without having to be unlocked again if they have an arm full of cuppa/food/whatever. They can then be locked from the outside with their keycard as they are going somewhere.

DD is convinced that she locked it and tested it was shut. But the cleaners come in once a month to clean the en suites and she thinks that they must have left it unlocked last time.

She has brought practically everything of value back with her, but doesn't like the thought of her room being empty, even though everyone else with a key has now left for the holidays and noone in theory can get into their corridor.

@Shimy, yes DS is really liking his course. He goes off to watch football matches in the SU bar (drinking soft drinks though!) with friends. He also has a posse of five from his school at UEA who he stays in touch with (a small year group and he's known them since he was 11). He says he loves being at university though, so I suppose all is good. Just worry that he's not making the most of his time there.

Shimy I previously talked about my reclusive son (I have changed name but have been here for a long time). Ds has not turned into a party animal, he chats to the people in his corridor but doesn't know everyone's name yet. He is happy and was full of it - course and the beautiful local area - when he came home for a few days during the strike but no, no partying. His favourite drink hobgoblin isn't even sold on campus so he's only had 2 bottles of beer!

shimy, I honestly have no idea! I think he has fallen behind in his work and has rather more assignments to do than he should have.... hence, he isn't coming home til this Sunday.

Apparently he doesn't need to go back til the 13th.

Funnily enough was talking about DS with DSib yesterday. We concluded that it was a tall ask to expect an overnight transformation.

We are picking DS up on Friday. Didn't really think ahead and he doesn't have a suitcase or anything suitable to bring all his stuff home in (just a load of IKEA bags!) so we're off to get him. It's about a 3 hour drive so not too bad. He doesn't have to vacate his room, but does need to bring home clothes, work (he's got progress exams in January so will need to do some work over the hols) and his PS4 - I guess that'll all add up.
We have bought a bike cover so that we can put his bike in his room over the hols. Not sure this is strictly allowed, but I don't like the idea of leaving it in the bike racks for a month - I fear it'll be stolen.
He has plans to go to 'Spoons with his old school friends over the hols - classy as ever! Unfortunately two of his best friends don't break up until the 20th, but I'm sure they'll still have plenty of time to catch up over the hols.

Didn't really think ahead and he doesn't have a suitcase or anything suitable to bring all his stuff home in

That occurred to us on a recent visit to DD, so we took a suitcase up with us for her visit home.

@NewModelArmyMayhem18 same here with DS. He was a quiet child generally - always got on with people and had friends at school but wasn't going out with them all the time. A little bit during A-levels going to the pub or football but still a small quiet group.

I want him to come out of his shell a bit, but also not go OTT crazy. Difficult line to walk so we just keep our fingers crossed I guess.

Hi all, not been on here for a while so had a bit of a catch-up. Dd is totally loving life. She adores her flatmates and it sounds like they've really bonded. They've been house hunting, but have been pipped to the post a few times on decent properties, so are still looking. Her course is very demanding but she seems to be doing extremely well, whilst still fitting in high levels of partying. She's gained 10lb, so the booze has something to answer for, but at least she's eating well. And maybe she'll stop having people comment on her size all the time now. 'Oh you're very skinny aren't you?!' 'Um, yes?', is usually how it goes. Not my genes sadly. She's having a blast, but is very much looking forward to Coming home to a full fridge and the dog. Also, she'll work as many shifts as she can fit in over the three weeks, to top up her cash reserves.

Dd2 wasn't sure at all about university, but after listening to her sister has already decided that she has to go!

My first time here. DS2 finishing 1st term. We live overseas so not seen him since delivering in early Sept. So excited. Obviously had phone calls and messages but no long chats. Nothing mentioned about accomadation for next year but does seem to have made friends with his flatmates and in nearby flats. DS1 is on 'year in industry ' so not returning for another week.

@Whatagoodidea welcome. Not surprised you're excited to see your DS2 - 3 months is a long time to go without seeing one's child. Hope you have a lovely reunion.

@mimiasovitch good to hear that your DD is flourishing. I too have a DD who is teased for being 'skinny' but she's not yet at the stage to drink alcohol yet.

@MrKlaw sometimes it does make me worry but I guess it is very early days for them. I think not drinking alcohol has something to do with not enjoying partying and lots of student socialising situations.

New So glad to hear DS is enjoying it all, he’s also very lucky to have a bunch of friends from school.
Catrescue Chatting to people in his flat is great! From recluse that’s a big improvement. It must really be enjoying himself, at least he tells you all about it at home.... looking at DS who says nothing.
Piggy oh no! That is a worry, do you think this is just a one off perhaps? It can take a while to adjust to the new workload and being expected to just get on with it without any prodding. To be honest you’re just going to have to leave him to it and let him know you’re always ready to listen (don’t mean to sound preachy Nothing more you can do at this stage, just pray for the best.

Question??

When they come home are they going to revert to type, expect everything done for them including washing, leaving dishes everywhere, generally making a mess or should we expect some improvement from them?

I’m not expecting anything different. DS has always washed his own clothes but apart from that, yes to the general mess especially in the bathroom. Soaking wet floor, toothpaste blobs in the sink, stinky towels but we’re all looking forward to seeing him .

Dd has revision to do so i will be happy to do most things for her. She's been very independent all term so I will look forward to clucking round her a bit