It's real now - leaving home to go to uni (part 3)

[user9512736123]

Here you go @Lucysky2017

Bristol went yesterday. It's a sobering thought that people in the crash may well have just dropped their DC off at Bristol :-(

Hi everyone. This was me last year and despite thinking it wouldn't be too bad, we did find the first few weeks a bit hard.

It's a bit like a bereavement in that you can't talk to or see your child whenever you want.

Don't under estimate the feelings you will have but try and focus on how proud you are and that your DC will soon be back.

I found regular one line what's app messages useful to see if he was still alive and a plan to visit in a few weeks to be something for us both to fix on. Rightly or wrongly I also liked and followed his uni and some society groups on my social media accounts so I could connect somehow. Even if it just to see what the weather is like where he is!

My over whelming feelings included being tired , drained and always having DS on my mind.

After about week 3 it all started to get back to normal for me. It wasn't unbearable but it was a strange time.

Be kind to yourselves, plan some treats and be very proud of your DC.

Mine has just gone off to year 2 and, apart from the joys of sorting out the student house, there are none of those year 1 feelings of sadness. Just looking forward to having a chance to clean his bathroom properly now he's gone 😁

DS going today - his slot isn't until this afternoon and only about 90 mins away so we don't need to rush.
I'm feeling v nervous for him because out of the blue he went through an awful period of depression/anxiety just over a year ago so feeling very protective. So so proud of him though.

I've said goodbye before his dad came to collect him and have come shopping. Strong coffee then a lot of retail therapy. And gin.

Good plan Crisp

dahliaaa, it's natural to be worried about him but I'm sure he will be fine and 90 mins is easily doable should either of you need to see each other

He's done well to get through his depression and to want to go off to uni.

Sluj thats good to know - should get used to it in a few weeks! Felt really strange when I woke up this morning but got a text from her - I think on her way to bed!

Thank you horse

Oh that was me horse

Ds1 room looks very neat and tidy

Anyone elses child going to Winchester?

Sluj, I can't wait until everyone has gone actually...... my older son goes tomorrow (he had graduated but been living at home) but we will see. My elderly neighbour says I will miss them all once everyone is out of the house!

It already feels so peaceful, clean, ordered. There was less mess than usual in the kitchen (although I still today have a son at home). The domestic jobs are fewer. I have a massive backlog of client work however with a whole load of work deadlines many currently missed due to two full days taking two twins to unviersity and son to move tomorrow and then an all day work thing in London on Tuesday. Perhaps next weekend the first without children for 33 years will be sad (doubt it)...(knowing my luck one of the 5 children will come home next week......).

I have had texts and photos from 3 children so far today, new picture sof the 2 day old grand child, nothing from child 5 but that is how he is and he is on a university field trip already (in Wales) until tonight; and my older son has to empty the entire contents of his room by 1pm and will be calling me when we start carrying things like desks down two flights before he goes to work. Let there be peace to let me earn the money to pay for university.

Am triaging client phone calls letting people know where I have been and when I will next be in work. If they would just email not telephone things would be a lot easier. Why does everyone want to talk all the time?

Ds1 and dd are going to do a streak ???

They only last a few seconds but apparently ds1 yesterday had his new flat mate in it

Oh god user

I didn't think of that ...

Although i did say to dh that he couldn't cry while driving as we didnt want to have an accident

Haha Oldie, I too am enjoying the solitude. Thought I might have been the only one that couldn't wait for them to go

They will both be back at Christmas and filling up the house again so it's not long really. That first year goes by in a flash!

Sluj that was a lovely post. It's very kind of you to share the benefit of your experience.

DS is my second, the first is going into year 4 of uni, but we see her at least once a week when she comes here for work and stays over, which is lovely.

I think would be more positive about the opportunities which should be open to me as a result of DS starting uni in a far away city if DH hadn't lost his job last year and still not got another one. No retail therapy or nights out for the foreseeable future. My part time work with school-age children is spread over most of the weekday evenings so evening activities are limited.

DS' decision of where he would study - Scottish local city conservatoire with fees paid by Scottish government, living at home and a scholarship or the crazily expensive, but probably better for the long term London offer and subsequent (successful) scramble for funding and helping him get ready to go has pushed DH's lack of job to the back of the list until now. I have mild but persistent chronic fatigue, so when I stop to think about things I feel quite depressing. Hopefully this is the coldest hour before the dawn. That sounds a bit OTT, but hopefully you know what I mean

No possibility of retail therapy here either, I'm paying a lot of uni related expenses but have lost £££ a month recently for various reasons so things aren't great. I've done unprecented amounts of laundry and have cleaned the windows this morning to try and stay busy.

^unprecedented

Hopefully this is good news

Hopefully it will start at this year for new students

Not in a few years time...

Haha. Philip Hammond is the local mp to ds uni and got a somewhat bumpy ride when he spoke there earlier this year. Maybe he feels this is a way to ensure his reelection!

Dd s are swapping bunks today when dd1 gets back from her last shift at work before uni. Got a night out with work planned tomorrow, farewell tapas for the three who are leaving her dance school.Weds and I'm cooking her favourite lamb chops and Mandarin oranges Friday. Really happy she's so excited to go but will seem very odd me not being such a large part of her life any longer

Thank you for your lovely post Sluj.
rogueantimatter, another parent of a London bound DS, although he doesn't start until the end of the month so reading this thread with interest as picking up lots of tips.

Quite probably LIZS

Missed DS just now as he wasn't around to handle the strimmer when we did the lawns this afternoon. It's been his job for the last 6 years. Had a text and he is just having lunch.

Reducing the fees overall and then the government subsidising the more expensive lab based courses rather than the cheaper arts students effectively doing so is what I've always though they should do eminently sensible. Discussing it this morning DD seemed entirely unconvinced it would happen in time to affect her, but they ought to put in some sort of correction for the students who've had 9k+ fees.