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Original poster

Please can someone help me. Im in so much pain and I dont know what to do.

992 replies

spookycharlotte121 · 19/04/2010 00:02

I have had horrible pains all day..... they feel like periiod pains. As the day has progressed they have been getting worse and worse.

Nurofen isnt touching it. Im totally exhausted by it and just want to sleep. Im sat here crying because I dont know what to do. I took painkillers nearly an hour ago anf they just arent working and I just want to sleep.

OP posts:
AitchTwoZone · 21/04/2010 22:47

i wonder, though... i presume they think well we've got epus, they handle that sort of thing. it seems to be a major disconnect between nhs 24, gps, a and e and then the epus, who do pretty well when they actually get hold of a patient with the symptoms.

scratchmyback · 21/04/2010 22:48

Oh this is awful - they left the poor girl so long and now she has lost a tube.

I am on her FB and have seen that Charlotte is avoiding speaking about details on there (and dont blame her either), so reiterate not to mention anything.

I do hope she is ok. What on earth is she going to tell her mum LF? Is her mum close enough to realise what has happened? She must know she has just come out of surgery.
I really feel for her - she is going to have so much to deal with to get over all of this, and to worry about her family finding out is a worry she could do without at the moment.

BleachedWhale · 21/04/2010 22:51

There is so much on this thread that could blow her anonymity.

AitchTwoZone · 21/04/2010 22:53

fear not, manicmummy, i knew someone had and it wasn't really a comment on that i promise. because yes, for goodness sakes, thank GOD she's still alive, thank the LORD, because really if she had been sent home and her tube had burst that night without her mum or anyone there, she would have been found by her children the following morning. so yes, i agree, i totally agree.

but for me at any rate, that was other people processing what had just happened to me at a rate that far outstripped my ability, iyswim? i just wanted still to be pregnant and excited. not facing months of blood tests after taking a chemotherapy treatment/painful physical recovery from lap and feared loss of fertility as well as terror of it happening again. so yes, i suppose it's probably an entirely reasonable response, but if you wouldn't say it to someone having a miscarriage then it's a response probably best kept in one's head.

differentID · 21/04/2010 22:55

Charlotte, I haven't been able to follow this thread due to work and other stuff, but I am so glad that certain posters on here and your mum got you to hospital. I am sorry that you have been in so much pain because some idiots failed to follow basic procedure.
When you are feeling stronger and healthier, please think about raising this issue with the trust, because they have treated you shamefully. You will have the full backing of people on here if you do want to do that and think of the simple changes which could help other women in a similar situation.
I can only wish you a speedy recovery, x.

Alambil · 21/04/2010 22:56

i really don't know, scratch

Alambil · 21/04/2010 23:00

JAMM.... can you email to confirm your pp address / name? (just to check it got through)

JustAnotherManicMummy · 21/04/2010 23:04

Thanks Aitch And no, it's definitely not something I'd say to someone who's just lost a baby. Horribly crass and insensitive. And I'm sorry some one said it to you at when it was the last thing you wanted to hear.

AitchTwoZone · 21/04/2010 23:06

oh god heaps did, it's practically the standard response.

Katymac · 21/04/2010 23:10

It is something that is said over & over again

Even now 10 years on someone said it to me

The nurses refused to refer to what happened to me as 'losing a baby' is was just an ectopic

The first aider and then the ambulance man saved my life; the ambulance man spoke to a nurse & said I was a 'dodgy' one & that I might not make it

But afterwards it was all about the plastic surgeon who was flown in () as I was allergic to metal & plastic

& how it wasn't anyone's fault the results had been missed and how it was the eve of the Millenium & it might have gone astray with the "Millenium bug"

But my baby still died - it didn't matter at the time that I hadn't - if fact it made it worse

JustAnotherManicMummy · 21/04/2010 23:11

Emailed you Lewis

Alambil · 21/04/2010 23:14

replied

AitchTwoZone · 21/04/2010 23:15

true story, katy, it seems melodramatic but particularly after the second one i did think i might have preferred to have drifted off with the pregnancy. terrible, really, but it does shatter you so. we will have to look after spookycharlotte, there is so much to go through yet.

hotcrossbunny · 21/04/2010 23:18

I've been lurking since this thread began. I know nothing about ectopic pregnancies, so haven't contributed, but I'm definitely behind a MN campaign about this.

Poor SC - I'm sending all my thoughts and prayers to you, and hope you have a comfortable night. xxx

Katymac · 21/04/2010 23:18

Dh refused to have sex for months afterwards as he' had done it to me

He went & had a vasectomy as he couldn't cope with the idea that he might have caused my death

The hospital offered IVF (as they had missed the results) but we couldn't cope with it

It is more common in West Indian/Afro-Caribbean women (1 in 20 cp 1 in 100 for White UK)- so DH assumed it was his genes that had caused it

AitchTwoZone · 21/04/2010 23:22

poor guy, thank goodness you both stuck it out together. it's the sort of thing that breaks couples up, i think. me and dh had our moments, he just didn't know what to do with me.

Katymac · 21/04/2010 23:24

That is so true - I think men need support during miscarriages/ectopic etc - they are so less able to deal with stuff like that (imo)

Poor DH was lost

everythingiseverything · 21/04/2010 23:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

navyeyelasH · 21/04/2010 23:48

I have been following this thread form the start what's gong on with SC now is she having an op?

I think I live really close to her, if she needs any local help can someone in contact pass on my email: imhayley @ gmail.com. I'm a childminder and think she has contacted me before, she if you tell her that she might know who I am. Thanks.

snala · 21/04/2010 23:49

whats the pp addy please?

Alambil · 22/04/2010 00:01

freedom 6 6 0 6 at hotmail dot com (no gaps) for paypal

navy, she's had the op - had a tube removed... is recovering, will email wrt other details

snala · 22/04/2010 00:07

Have just sent a small donation. All I can afford sorry.

Still following the thread closely and sending my love and thoughts to you spooky.

Knickers0nMyHead · 22/04/2010 00:14

My thoughts are with you Spooky love.

Re-added you to fb btw as last account got deleted.

Cannot donate I'm afraid though...really sorry

Alambil · 22/04/2010 00:14

thanks snala

CJCregg · 22/04/2010 00:21

Hi, I have also been lurking on this thread and am so impressed with the incredible help you all gave Charlotte. Have sent a donation, please let me know if you don't get it.