Problem/Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support V

[kokeshi]

Welcome to the thread, the purpose of this is to give anyone who is having any trouble with their drinking, a safe place to come and post about it honestly and without judgement.

There are many of us that use the thread for support and encouragement: some in recovery, others just needing a place to share about their worries. It's been going on in one form of another for a while now and has helped many people.

Thank you to all of those who have kept it going thus far, and welcome to anyone who has decided the time has come to ask for help.

Everybody's welcome, no matter what stage your drinking is at.

Jump right in, the water's fine

Have you been to the Glasgow Print Studio? I'm sure you have! I used to love going there and doing a bit of etching. I realised that I wasn't going to be any good at it unless I put in a lot of practice, and at the time I was animating and I couldn't do 2 things at once.

What are you using screen printing for? I have friends in London who print - one who prints fabric and has an industrial scale operation, and most of the others who work in a co-operative print studio.

I've got to take dd2 to the doc about a rash that doesn't seem to be getting better and then go again this afternoon about me..

We were hoping to spend a couple of months in Scotland seeing friends and rels and travelling around. Hopefully we will be able to do the trip in the autumn.

hI everyone.

HI naswm- don't get the hump, it didn't come across like she was having a go.

Although, only speaking from my own experience, I used to get the right hump if someone dared to tackle me about my drinking, when i was drinking alcoholically, but thats what happens I suppose. People were only trying to help, but I couldn't see it at the time, and it was easier for me to just get angry with them, and then feel sorry for myself, etc.

I struggle with life too, and I have had to work through awful things from my past , and you're not alone in having the difficulties you have touched upon. x
And hey, most of my posts get ignored too, so don't get paranoid!

Hi Ryobi- yes thats exactly what people suggested I did when I first stopped drinking, just KEEP BUSY!
Each trigger you are recognising is brilliant- it seemed everything was a trigger for me too, but it gets easier, like the first time you walk past the alcohol isle in shops, etc, all the firsts.
You are being honest and thats a really big key to recovery.

naswm, I am sorry you are having such a difficult time but I think teasle is right, alot of us have lots of past issues (and also present) that we try to and are trying to deal with. I think its something people forget when they see someone with a 'drink' problem that the drink is often just a symptom. Something alot of people turn to for comfort and then for some of us it gets out of control. I have quite an addictive nature anyway so adding something that is highly addictive into the mix was never going to be a fantastic situation

BlaDeBla, I am really sorry if my post to you sounded insensitive. Reading what you have posted today about your lymphodoema has made me realise how 'simplistic' I was trying to make things. I really hope I didnt upset you and I hope it gopes well today with your child and tommorrow with you x

So, how is everyone doing then?

Morning
I was all ready to go to yoga yesterday but I had to go to an urgent biz appointment. It WILL not happen next week. Have bought my new tracky bottoms (bit worried they're a bit tight) bum's not as pert as it used to be lol.

God I've just read what everyone has been up to but have completely forgotten now!

How are you doing today bladebla?

Nice to hear you are feeling kicks now Daisy! I was thinking about being a peer breastfeeding supporter but just too busy atm. In a few years I will think about it agian. I think its a crying shame how breastfeeding is viewed by society today and how little support women get. It's like a dying art. I know women choosing to bottle feed get vilified but try breastfeeding an older baby (or even a young baby!) in public or explaining to your MIL that you are still feeding your toddler. I get a bit emotional about the subject really (and it's not breast v bottle, but protecting the art of bf)! So rant over (and I could really rant some more too!)

Hi glowwormish, nice to see you again, hope you do manage to get something done just for you. I'm really going to start meditating again, I always feel so much better when I do it and then life and work get in the way. It's all about prioritising for me.

BlaDeBla, sorry, that's what I mean actually - the Glasgow print studio. DP and I have a graphc designer pal who uses it quite a lot. It's definitely worthwhile paying the membership fee for the courses and access you get.

We're looking at getting t-shirts printed. It's all done by hand at the moment and it's labour intensive. Obviously getting a machine to do it would free us up to expand the range. We've looked to outsourcing and there's a place in Glasgow that does it, but they want the colours separated. It's been causing me loads of hassle actually because I can't get a definitive answer from anyone as the best way to do this for print. I tried doing it in Photoshop using the magic wand tools but there were bits missing from each layer.

The tutor of the PS2 course I've just been on said to just change the mode from RGB to CMYK, but it seems too simple! Any thoughts?

I'm off to Edinburgh this afternoon, I have to present a unit in a course tomorrow and I hate speaking in public. I don;t even know why I sign up for these things I always stress out and panic.

How's everyone today?

Well done you, Kokeshi, for getting up there!
I feel like total crap today. Last night, I drank a whole bottle of wine for no good reason, apart from feeling dreadful about what's going on in my life. I think I need a really good reason NOT to have this baby, and although there are LOTS of reasons not to bring someone new into the world, I am not doing well in thinking about them. I do not want to be in this position, and nor do I want to drink. Today, I feel a bit sick - it's sodding hormones. On Mon I have another scan. They thought last week that it was as early as 5 weeks. I do not want to have a baby that comes pre-damaged by my stupid behaviour. Guilt trip extraordinaire. It's horrid, really horrid, and I don't know what to do or think.

i wish I could say something to help, just hope you get through this ok, and make the decisions that are right for you.
What are you doing this evening? x

BladeBla
Hold on in there. God what an awful position to be in. I would urge you not to drink too much but feel like that is presumptious of me. I know that when I drank during my pg's I felt (and still feel) terrible, even tho' it wasn;t that much but still a bit more than i should. I know that you are trying to decide what to do, God I feel awful for you and will be thinking of you. I have no advice and have not been in your position so feel a bit of a fraud. Let us know what you're doing, maybe a regular rant will help?
Hugs

Gerbra
Where are you???? Have you dropped off hte radar, what are you up to? Are you on your walking holiday or perhaps you're really busy? How's the non smoking going?

blahdeblah, when I found out I was pregnant with DS, my partner and I had just decided to split and I fairly blitzed the wine for about a week. DS is absolutely fine. I'm not saying it isn't risky, but just think of the women who don't realise they are pregnant until quite late on who have been living the high life all the while. Basically try not to stress and concentrate your energy oin what it is you want to do.

Have you spoken to anyone about it? Like the Marie Stopes clinics or Brookes Advisory Service. some useful numbers here. I think it's important that you get some impartial advice.

Take Care xx

Will try and get on more later. hi to everyone else but wuickly, jo i hope the workshop thingy went well and PO, hope the LFTs are OK.

Thank you so much for that link, Daisy. I'm still in total limbo. I've had a look at the BPAS and all the things they suggest are things we have been talking about. I do not want to have to decide whether someone lives or dies. I just don't want to be there. no wine for me tonight. We're moving house so won't be able to post for a few days. Have a good weekend, everyone!

take care of yourself blahdeblah, and good luck with the house move. I think you should save making a decision until after the move, but fwiw, I know how hard this can be; i had a termination in my final year at uni and it's still something i have tinges of regret about, even though I know it was the only decision we could have made at the time.

PurpleOne, how did you get on on Thursday?

Thanks for everyone's concern.

That stupid keyworker told me to start switching the drinks and told me to drink wine. So I bought a bottle on Weds eve, and a very bad move.
Never made it to the LFT on Thurs as was still asleep in bed 'hangs head in shame'. I did ring the nurse and told her what happened so she will send me out another appt in the post.

Should have known better really.

I went back to the Stellas for a couple of nights, and now onto the Carling. It's cheaper, less alcohol and less units.
Sorry I haven't been around - had a very inspirational friend here, whom I haven't seen for 18 months.

Hope everyone is well? x x

Hi Purple have drunk Carling before it's ok. Also have drunk Asda's smartprice lager (also ok) very cheap and only 3%. Remember the days when I would only drink 'cool' beer. Funny how it was so much more expensive - those advertisers have us sussed . Draw the line at Pulse or Whitelighting - mad behaviour and hangover guaranteed!!

Took my son to a birthday party this morning. I looked hellish with red eyes (conjuntivitus)and felt a bit paranoid that everyone was looking at me suspiciously - reminiscent of my drinking days. The irony of the situation was not lost on me .

Ack! White Lightning is disgusting stuff. Mad behaviour yes. Bad hangover yes. Avoid the stuff like the plague now.

Tried the wine last week, which was a bad move too.

Just beers for me now, and am trying the %age reduction route. Same quantity but less %.

Didn't sleep very well last night though. Laid in bed, tossed and turned and opened my eyes (I knew I hadn't been asleep) and it was daylight. Damn bloody birds.

Oh, I have a date on Weds morning. Just meeting up for lunch. He asked me if I wanted to go to a bar or a pub, but as I don't drink in the day I just gently guided him to a greasy Joe for some coffee and a cooked brekkie. Sounds romantic LOL.

DD1 is dyeing my hair tomorrow.

He doesn't have my number, he gave me his, so I witheld mine 141 and rang him tonight. 3 bloody hours later and I'm off to bed now.
If nothing happens, me thinks he could be a very good friend.

How's everyone else doing? I think I saw a tumbleweed roll across the thread earlier

Hi,Every 1.Hope you are all well.Its a shame drink gives us confidence and also takes it from us.Makes us lazy hung over feeling stupid.We all do have our sensible days.I do just a case of two steps forward 1 step back.I agree with you purple 1 birds wake you up with thier singing.(think its called dawn corus).I get planes flying over where i live.They are noisey as well.If any 1 is restless the least little noise will disturb you.Hope your date goes well.xx

Hi everyone, havent been around for a while... been battling a few demons and trying to sort the crap bits of my life out.

i havent drunk since Saturday night and am determined not to drink again until at least the weekend. (I've drunk 1+ bottles of wine a night every night (except 1) for two and half years!).

i feel like a different person, much more positive, happier, less bad tempered.

Sunday night i slept like a log but last night i woke up every hour or two having very wierd, sometimes horrible dreams.

I'm wondering if this is withdrawal kicking in and would appreciate some advice on what else i can expect... I've seen chat on here about sweats, panics etc. so i want to be prepared to i dont cave in!!!!

HI Manky- withdrawals usually last for around 5 days, - depending on your own circumstances, etc, you may feel anxious, headaches, shaky, etc. There is a list somewhere on one of the previous threads...sorry can't find it. Anyone else find it?

However, it can take quite a while for your sleep patterns to return to normal. It took weeks before my sleep was sorted, so you may have to put up with disturbed sleep for a while. Just stick it out, and it does sort itself out in the end, your body needs a bit of time to readjust.
You're doing brilliantly.

Hi Purple- good idea for a lunchtime date.
Dawn chorus is a beautiful sound, what you on about?

hI everyone else.

HI mother3- drinking initially gave me confidence too, but at the end of my drinking I was a wreck, and could barely face anyone wothout first having a drink. horrible.

Just a quick hello from me

had my scan yesterday and it looks like we are having another boy . DS is made up as he so badly wants a little brother.

sorry things have been tough mMummy, and I hope you can get things back on an even keel. Keep posting

Hi mother3

jellibabe, I think your paranoia was probably unfounded; they were probably just wondering whether you were contagious to their precious children

hi teasle and PO as well.

It has been a wee bit quiet around here hasn't it? Keep talking everyone

When does the Next Sale start? Holly? Want to get some boy baby stuff, but I'm not buying it now with the sale just around the corner!

oops, I meant that last post to go on my PN thread

Thanks Teasle, Hi Daisy.

I went to the supermarket just now and even despite special offers on my favourite wines (typical!!!!) I bought 6 litres of juice instead and NO wine !!!!