2005: the flare-loving fag-free club

[charliecat]

Here we go girls

Just found your thread about your boys FG.....I know how you feel BTW. At time like that I have stuck the playstation/tv/dvd on for a couple of evenings after school and made dinners they like so theres no arguing over that and stayed very quiet myself to recooperate myself after feeling totally battered by the parenting process....if needbe, different room/activity for each child.
Then on the third night I will organise myself so theres scrabble or monopoly on the kitchen table for straight after school and because its there they want to play and as I got it out I cant say Oh you two play yourself (as you do) and it tends to lead to a better evening/few days...HTH..
Failing that banish them to thier room and let them beat each other up!

Could you chuck them outside for half an hour to burn off excess energy after school? With coats on and gloves on of course!

thanks so much for the addiction stuff cc, am gonna print out and read in times of stress - it is so spot on.

and also ta for your thoughts on my boys - yeah, you're right, I waver far too much - threaten, then reinstate the treat cos I feel bad and they've been all contrite.

have had a gentle word this morning and told them we're gonna see how things go with their sis over next 2 weeks - and if they don't buck up their ideas the sleepover def won't happen. At the moment it is 'in the balance' and they are very aware of that. I have to break this awful cycle somehow.

dd is off sick today, glued to fairly odd parents! (that's a prog, not a reference to me and dh!)

No worrys FG...I read that shit and feel much better and like sharing it for that reason!
At least your boys are upset..it means they are taking you seriously....and if they do behave they will have the sleepover xx{{{{hugs}}}}

i i thought i would gatecrash this board as i too am battling the weed! Brief history:
Smoked from 1990 ish, gave up when found out i was pregnant, and it didn't bother me at all. Carried on being a smug non-smoker, then on a mums night out had the odd one. DD was taken into hospital, and i started again. It was something to do when phoning worried rellies. Carried on after, with a few sad attempts at giving up, but have now been on patches for 11 days and smoke free. I do feel better, am not spending as much, smell better etc. But still feel the urge. I have tried to go to a local support group, but they are fully booked for the next 2 weeks - i basically wanted patches on prescription!
Dh has quit with me, but he is doing it on will power alone (and sherry!!).
I am getting frustrated as all non-smoking friends don't seem to understand how hard it is. I keep trying to explain that if you are on a diet, you allow your slef the occassional treat, with smoking there is no treat. I suppose the treat is longer life, more money etc.
Oh i will stop waffling now - dd is asleep and the urge has gone!
Thanks for listening, i am not usually this boring!

LOL Fee77 hello! I left a message on your other thread inviting you here so your not gatecrashing at all!
Yes this is it really isnt it...no more fags.
The thing is though, they are only a treat when you cant have one...when you are smoking 15-60 a day they are a curse! Feel free to moan...thats what this thread is here for. We can all moan and listen to each other and offer a sympathetic ear...we know how it is!

Thanks cc. I have just got back from boots with more rations - buy one get one free on patches if anyone else is doing that way. I know what you mean about the treat thing, i am the same with chocolate and alcohol. In a few months i will probably have to get some MN patches as i seem to spend so long here at the moment - i usually stop 10 mins before DH is home and clean or something so he thinks i have been busy all day!!

Sorry, i appear to have killed your thread. I shall go back to lurking!!

you haven't killed it at all fee77, please come on here as often as you like - it is so so hard, and this thread is the only thing that has got me through after a v shaky on off on off pattern of smoking last year.

It's brilliant that you're doing this. But let's face it, those urges and cravings do linger on for some months... am sure you can do it tho. I was a 20 a day smoker for 20 yrs apart from near-abstainance during pregnancies (to my shame still had the odd puff).

Please please do join us here. sherry - sounds like a good plan!! I drink cheap white wine, not idea I know but helps loads, plus I rely v heavily on lozenges (cc! still wanna sell yours?)

Feeling a bit manky, caught dd's bug - but so glad it's the w'end (even if dh is working the next two!)

how is everyone? have been v busy with work, sorry to be absent for most of this weekxxxxx

Heelllloooooooooooooooooo....sorry...stupid infra red mouse decided not to work today and couldnt get on the PC at all...thankfully dp has plugged an old one in so we are ok now!!
You havent killed the thread at all Fee77...sometimes theres is constant chat and right now seems to be a quiet time...I quite often chat to myself for 5 or 6 posts before someone else posts...lol.
Have visitors and am neglecting them to write this so bye for now and mouse permitting...I will be back later xxxxxxxxxxxx

fiona and gang! well done all of you lot for keeping it up! fiona how the other thing with les garcons?

This is me back again a few vodkas later...I said id be back so here I am...though the screen is jumping about in front of my very eyes...Thank You Coddy! (We dont smell anymore!)
Fiona, mine are 1mg...I will post them/half if Mink wants some free of charge they really are gathering dust here...I will make a point over the weekend of doing it ok?
Fee77...just reread your post...hows your DH doing? My dp is having fewer and fewer(Hoorah!) but hasnt managed to QUIT. Which is what needs to be done really. Cant really say anything as I have stopped and started so many times myself.
You said the urge had gone by the time youdd finished posting.....GOOD!!! Thats why its great having this thread. You switch on the PC bash away at the keyboard and you are still a nonsmoker....its better to do that than smoke a fag and be back to square 1....rant and type away! How old is your dd by the way?
My dds are 7 and 4 xx

How come if I drink noddy my spelling is great? yet sober its appaling? Thats really odd isnt it?
Morning guys!

Bloody noddy....voddy!

Is it me killing this now with my bad spelling?!!
Did you know 13 smokers die every hour...................OMG.
Fact of the day.

Argh Bluemoon gone since the 9th...Mink saying shedd be gone for a few days and now that seems to be dragging on...Mammya posting teeny bits once a week...Fee77 vanashing its a lonely life as I post to myself for the 6th or 7th time...
Are the boys behaving FG? Hope so!

Cc, FG, MM etc. etc. etc. I'm still here, lurking, not posting as I don't deserve to be here at the moment as I've totally failed in giving up smoking. The moment I can hold my head up again I'll be back.

I know this is going to make everyone say that I should keep posting and it might help. But I truly feel rubbish about it and need to flunk quietly to myself for a while.

I don't think all is lost. I think Christmas was a bigger strain than I'd imagined and I've got to get the right frame of mind back.

I'm constantly keeping an eye on what's happening with you guys though so keep it up you success stories! Trust me, it feels shit to be failing ...

I know BM I know...and I know why your staying away from the thread....its ok, you come back when your ready...I completly understand...this is my 200+ attempt xxxx
But!... pop in and say hi whatever happens xxxxx

keep writing longish post and it won't appear!! testing.. testing... got drunk with dh last night and puffed his fags... failure... failure...
WHY AM I SO DAMN STUPID!!!!

am telling myself it's just a blip (yeah another!) and wouldn't have happened if I'd not been tiddly...

cc and cod, lads MUCH better thank you!! They are having to 'earn' their birthday sleepover.

bm, come back when you're ready hon or if you just fancy a chat xx

Haven't been so good myself lately, had a couple of cigarettes last week end, also had friends over this week end and smoked quite a few spliffs. Oh dear. Felt crap today of course, hungover and in the throes of nicotine withdrawal. Will I never learn? Have to get back on the wagon.
Anybody else with more positive stuff to post? I am sure that would, strangely, make me feel better about the whole thing.

Argh, just typed a huge post and it vanished.
All I can say really is what keeps me going is knowing that no matter what happens the day will be a better one if I dont smoke. I can have a really shit day...yes...often...but I am not going to make it worse by renewing my addiction to fags. And I keep coming back to ....what makes you think its going to be any easier tommorow...because its not going to be.
Mammya...you wanted positive...well I havent had a fag since November the 27th....I have had good days and bad days but I am surviving and its beautiful waking up knowing im not going to start the day smoking and end the day smoking....even if a shit day is looming...that is so so so so so so nice.
FFFFIIIIOOOOOOOOONNNNNNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Could you get DH to ask you to go away and wash your face and brush your teeth and then see if you still wanted one 5 mins later? Once that thought of ...just one...gets in your head its like a poison. You feel you are depriving yourlself for every minute you dont give in. Try and stop it and shake yourself and ask yourself do you really want to do it? And even if you do...ask yourself how your going to feel in the morning about it.
My god if I could do it for you I would!!!!!!!
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Ok, i wont just lurk! I couldn't get on over the weekend - dh tends to take over the computer!
DD is 15 mths. Both Dh and i are still non smokers - 15 days fag free. Wow! And the amazing thing is i have remained nice. Usually when i give up i turn into the bitch from hell, and go out of my way to annoy dh!! And then i cry alot. But so far so good. I still annoy dh, but it is at my normal level. I have noticed that since giving up i hardly see him. Usually he plays on the compter and i watch tv, but we meet up for the odd fag out the back door through out the evening. Now once dd is in bed he pops off and comes down when he's ready for bed!! Peace at last! No more trying to cram a fag in the adverts!

well done fee77, and great that you're not all watery eyed - I get like that too when I cold turkey it - v tearful, emotional, a wreck basically.

cc all you say is true xxxxx you're so right. am not gonna dwell on it. was drunk and stupid. Yeah next time will go splash water on my face or something... anyway feeling pretty positive today, sat night has been my only blip and will try & learn from it (ie how upset and cross I feel next morning as soon as I remember and fee the terrible lung-ache!)
It REALLY is not worth it. You are doing BRILLIANTLY by the way, hope you're feeling v v proud of yourself cc. You are a beacon of success!
I wanna be like yoo-hoo-hooo...

Fiona you can be drunk and stupid without smoking you know
Well done Fee and DH...that is EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I know what you mean about not seeing your other half as much...I dont even have as much to say to my bestest friend anymore Most of our deepest conversations were held over a fag and shes always itching to go and smoke.....................................arrrgggghhhh.......so it makes our meetings very odd!!!
I see my dp when hes slinking out the back door.
Kids want me..........back laterx