Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

General health

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Problem/Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support IV

1000 replies

lackaDAISYcal · 07/04/2008 00:07

Smile
OP posts:
BottlebinBerrie · 28/04/2008 11:01

Here's to a sober week then!

BrassicMonkey · 28/04/2008 16:38

Thanks for your support everyone. I have to break associations this week, so I'm not allowed to use the PC unless it's for something constructive - jeez, no booze, no diet coke and now no PC .

Wanted to wish everyone well for this week as I'm not sure if I'll be back until the detox period is over.

Good luck for whoever is participating in sober Monday. I'll catch up when I can.

Thanks again

gracepaley · 28/04/2008 17:00

Is MN not considered constructive then?
Good luck, Brassic.

paperchain · 28/04/2008 17:11

Sorry about last night folks. Feeling really upset atm and no one was on msn to talk to so I came here looking for someone. But by the time anyone had turned up I had gone.

I'll add my best wishes to BM here (altho she knows I am right behind her and admire what she is doing).

PCx

paperchain · 28/04/2008 20:13

anyone here now?

paperchain · 28/04/2008 21:21
Sad
paperchain · 28/04/2008 21:50
Sad
gerbrajess · 28/04/2008 22:14

Paperchain I'm about for a bit - are you okay?

Flowertop · 28/04/2008 22:41

BM will be thinking of you and sending you lots of hugs and best wishes.

PC r you ok. I have some time to chat....

jellibabe · 28/04/2008 22:43

Hi Gerbra & Paperchain. How are you tonight?

I had an early night on Sunday. Imposed martial law on the kids and we were all in bed for 8pm. Negotiated for the price of watching Spiderman 2, which was a result as my son was asleep by 8:30pm. The downside to this was I had to endure it again tonight in full (he remembered he hadn't seen it all).

Bottlebin my boast about ironing did not live up to it's claim. I admired the pile for sometime before coming to terms with the fact I couldn't be bothered. Settled for mopping the floor and doing the dishes.

Current drinking status is sober and feel stronger for it. Emotionally I'm on defrost. Think it will be sometime before I stabilize.

jellibabe · 28/04/2008 22:46

Hello Flowertop

Flowertop · 28/04/2008 22:50

Hi JB hope all is good with you. You are doing so well with staying sober. Keep posting as it is very encouraging. Hi to everyone else. XX

jellibabe · 28/04/2008 22:51

Night all going to bed. Tiredness makes me emotional too and I think I have a gruelling week ahead x

jellibabe · 28/04/2008 22:52

Thanks Flowertop I am just so relieved that people are still posting. I was worried that people might be put off. Good to see the thread is still alive. Crawling off to bed now.

gerbrajess · 28/04/2008 22:59

Hi all - sorry I missed you JB and Flowertop!

Keep popping back as I'm still working ...but I'm sober !

Paperchain I'll be popping in for the next half an hour or so if you want someone to chat to?

Gerbra x

gerbrajess · 29/04/2008 00:16

Hey paperchain - am off to bed now - hope things are okay...
Gerbra x

glowwormish · 29/04/2008 05:29

Here I am again, bugger.
Felt like head butting the wall a couple of times last night. ds was crying and I couldn't cope. Just wanted to knock myself out. Feel like a total bitch for shouting at him.
I am at the stage now that I am going to the gp's, not sure what she'll do but I can't takw this strain anymore.
Thanks for all your kkind words. Koshi, couple of answers for you. What's in front of me? Well I am just firefighting. dp and I have a horrendous work load. Its not being self employed thats the problem, its having employees. A recent for instance: we sacked a member of staff for stealing from us, now she is taking us to industrial tribunal. We've had quite a few people chancing their arm and trying to sue us so I know how much work I will have to put into it even though I will just pass it all to our lawyers. But it makes me SICK. She was doing an awful job but has managed to get the first foot on the industrial tribunal ladder (don't knwo how). I have so MUCH work to do already I am seething with pure anger. Everyone wants a quick buck but they don't want to get off their arse and work for a living. You're right Koshi, I'm sure no-one is happy if they just have this lottery mentality. me and dp are busting our balls. I'm just waiting for the next joker to have a go. Had no idea business was like this.
With breaking things down, yes I get into work and think OK what is most urgent. I get that done with being interupted by peolpe a million times. I have shed loads of stuff I never have time to even look at and stuff that I really must do but haven't even looked at for 6 months plus.
me and dp are best at doing the high level selling, which is what the business survives on but the pair of us are constantly distracted from this, its like wading through treacle. The employees we have are generally fairly new or pretty flaky, with one or 2 stirling people on whom we depend. We are constantly recruiting but on the hurry up because time is so short.
I cannot load dp with any of my problems because he has more problems than me. He works at least 12 hours a day. I am pracically full time and look after the kids the rest of the time. We\ get 1 day a week when we go to in laws. Last week I just went upstairs and slept for 4 hours. We usually go for a walk which is the only toghter time we get, but I am so exhausted I can't manage this now. I feel like my body is made of lead.
We know that we need to get a decent member of staff in now as we are at that stage but that will take at least a couple of months, if not more, to find the right one.
And going to AA? Where would I find the time? Believe me I have NO time. I pick kids up and then its bed time whcih takes from between 7.30pm til about 8.30pm (on a bad day). My dp is never home before 8.30pm (at which time he comes in and off loads taking me til bed time) We don;t know anyone in the area to babaysit and even if we did, could I seriously ask a babysitter to put my kids to bed or ask my kids not to see me for another evening (when they're in full time care)? And addressing my drinking now? Its just another task that I coan't even comprehend, how do I work through that and cope with the rest of my life? Maybe I'm in denial but seriously I can';t take anyomore. I know all the things you say are true...drinking makes you worse etc etc, bugger

glowwormish · 29/04/2008 05:45

f*ucking brilliant now ds is up. can't i have 5 mins peace

BottlebinBerrie · 29/04/2008 07:20

Oh dear glowwormish. That's a lot of pressure. I expect that many of us relate to highly stressful moments in our work lives. I certainly associate that with early morni ng waking.
You have more than that to deal with though. Children, living in a new area etc.
Do go and see your GP soon. Is there any way at all you can take a bit of a break? When I have felt like you my GP has signed me off for a bit but you can't do this. Is there any way you could take a regular afternoon off somehow for the sake of your mental health? I guess that is a silly question given all you have to do.

gerbrajess · 29/04/2008 11:51

Oh Glowwormish - I was thinking about you yesterday and wondered how you were doing.

We are in fairly different boats in that I have no employees so am responsible just for myself and my own work. I did work as a manager of an agency for 2 years and that was STRESSFUL - it wasn't even my own business, but the responsibility that came with that was often overwhelming.

From what you said, I don't know what to suggest. Something has to give though as you can't continue with this pressure. Is there any part of your workload you could perhaps delegate to your stirling employees? Are you close enough to any of them to be honest and say you're currently struggling with the level of work and perhaps ask them to take on more work temporarily, just so you have some breathing space?

I understand if you don't have this kind of relationship with them, that will be difficult though...

Are your in-laws retired? Could they perhaps have your DCs for a week so you could recharge the batteries? Although that won't work either if they're not near your DCs' schools.

I know this is probably a totally inappropriate thing to suggest in the circumstances but could you try going without wine for one night? You'll find it makes a huge difference to the next day - your head will be clearer and you'll feel much more capable. Like all the wise bods on here say, if you go for one night you're not setting yourself up with an insurmountable challenge...

If I have any brainwaves about how to find you time I'll let you know . If I were God, I'd put 2 extra days in your week for relaxation!

Hope everyone else is okay today. BB was sober last night and feel much better for it today.

Pop back later
Gerbra x

Stripteasle · 29/04/2008 13:59

Hello to everyone.

Glowormish, sounds really tough- anything you could possibly do to change things, even for a while?

Hi Gebra- you're sounding well.

Stripteasle · 29/04/2008 14:10

HI Fio- hows it going?

gerbrajess · 29/04/2008 14:30

Hi Stripteasle - how are things for you at the moment?

I am feeling well - I know one night off drinking isn't much in the big scheme of things, but the sense of being more in control (even after one night sober) makes such a huge difference to my state of mind!

It's p'ing with rain here but have my head down with work so that's ok, no immediate need to go out and get drenched!

Gerbra x

Stripteasle · 29/04/2008 14:47

Yeah but Gerbra- all those one nights off the drink add up don't they- so don't minimise it- you're doing well, and your also being honest about it all too.

Weather's lovely up here in the north.
Things are good, thanks for asking- am feeling quite chipper actually. Going shopping with DS1 later after school- he wants to buy man perfume stuff- like Paul Smith or Hugo Boss- any suggestions?

gerbrajess · 29/04/2008 15:03

Mmmm - not really my forte - but had a boyfriend a while back who used to wear Joop (for men obviously) - I think it was called Joop (it was dark pink).
It was quite nice as I seem to remember...only if you hardly wear any as it's quite strong.

Thanks for the encouragement Stripteasle, it really does make a difference...

Have fun at the shops!
Gerbra x

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.