Problem/Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support IV

[lackaDAISYcal]

I'm eating a yogurt and trying to decipher hedonia. will go soon

the talk obviously went well then? You will tell us when you're going to be on telly won't you?

Twas pretty nerve-wracking gerbra, I'm not a trained public speaker and I was standing at a podium and speaking to a lecture theatre full of medical professionals at the top of their fields. I had done absolutely no preparation as well sothey were either being very nice or I had some divine intervention! Thanks for asking though

I usually am on the other side of the camera so this is a bit weird. I think you might not get it if you are in England, it's a regional news/feature segment (I'm not a presenter by the way, or famous in case you were wondering!).

Definitely off to bed, I'm hooked on this Ikea bedroom planner thingy that you can download from the website...it's fab! And, I'll say g'night!

I had a drink last night. Seemed like a good idea at the time...

I feel as ill as anything today.

I have the whole day free to do what I want and so far I have only managed to put one load of washing on and a little tiny bit of clearing up. I have to clean the whole house from top to bottom and my head is killing me and my stomach is too.

I am off to the gym at 1pm. I am on a 6 week induction programme so I have to keep that appointment.

Oh woe is me.

But in a way I suppose it is good. I feel like shite, all weepy too and I know damn well I don't want to feel like this tomorrow so I won't be drinking tonight.

Hi Habitual- its all a learning curve innit?
Hope you feel better this afternoon.

Like my new name? Makes me sound sort of interesting and saucy doesn't it? Thanks Jelli!

Greetings all,
This is my first post and I hope you don't mind me gatecrashing your party? I have been drinking fairly heavily for about 8 years - a bottle of wine most nights.

Dancing with the Alcohol Fairy is not good, not cool, but bloody hard to resist at times as I am sure you all know.. I find I can't function when I have had a cuddle with the fairy.

However since Xmas I have really tried to fight her off and succeeded to a great extent. I still binge from time to time but I'm mainly sober.

These are the things I have found helpful:

Kudzu (£9.99 from Holland & Barrett is a natural herb that reduces the cravings. It really does work).

Vitamins: Berocca from Boots or anywhere is reputed to contain all the vits and minerals lost during through drinking. Marvelous stuff.

Milk Thistle or Liver care

The Easy Way to Stop Drinking by Allen Carr.

And last, but not least Bright Eye Alcohol Forum - a friendly, helpful forum run by peeps with alcohol problems. A good laugh is guaranteed.

I hope this post helps someone. All of the above recommendations have helped me no end.

All the best

Nice one Stripteasle - am quite jealous of everyone's new and saucy names! (mine conjures up images of grannies and blue rinses)

Habitual - try not to beat yourself up about last night. Look how well you've done. It might work in your favour that you felt so rotten today? How was the gym?

Nice to meet you Isadora. You sound like you're pretty much in control of the booze now - well done!
How did you get it under control (barring the binges) - did you seek outside help like AA? Would be really interested to hear.

Thanks for the recommendations. I actually bought milk thistle on friday after reading recommendations for it on this thread. Will definitely have a look at the forum you mentioned too.

Hope everyone's well and having a good weekend. Probably won't pop back now until tomorrow - have a good saturday night whatever everyone's up to...

Gerbra x

Thanks isadora I've googled the site and it looks really interesting. Going to the Cinema for a change of scene. Will peruse it later at my leisure.

Hope everyone is having a good evening!!

oh habitual i read your earlier comment and was going to say we must have stopped drinking on the same day and are still booze free but i see you drank last night nevermind, 9 days was fab and you can start again as you mean to go on. I really really wanted a drink last night fwiw. I even had to pop to the shop at 7pm for headache tablets for my dhj and I even stopped at the wine fridge to see if anything was reduced/on offer as it would have been my excuse...nothing was...On wednesday I will have been alcohol free for 2 weeks. Fri/Sat is always the worst time for me, so I am so pleased I have got through another weekend.

Glad the talk went well kokeshi, I would have shit myself

oh and I was going to say I have the alan carr book and have never read it i think maybe I should!

New to this have DH who has issues with alcohol i live with him along with our DD and DS its a constant worry for me if hes not home when he says he will be i know where he will be , i try to understand and help and i think he to wants help but where do i go ? he has a great deal of peasure at work and i know he needs to relax and unwind but i do think its becoming a problem . i want to help what can i do ?

try ringing Al Anon?

I dont know what to suggest other than that have you tried talking to him?

Thanks , and yes we talk all the time about it , he knows he has a problem only last week he was taken off to hospital woke up with bad chest pains and breathing trouble , stress and alcohol as he did have around 4 pints and 1 and half bottles of wine the night before thought that would have said enough but through the week he still drinking , although not as much , but still a few pints sorry

Hi Iworry- there is a good thread you may find helpful for partners of addicts- think its also in the health section.
Also, Al-anon is for the families of alcoholics, you could give them a call, may be useful to talk to, and have good advice for you

I am really sorry you are going through this. The impact of living with someone with an active drink problem can be awful. That he is willing to talk is a good sign, but you need to look after yourself and your DCs too.
Hope this helps.

So, having just watched the lovely, gorgeous Gok Wan yesterday and namechanged, realised straight away, thanks Teasle that isn't going to work either, so what about this? Sorry I haven't had a chance to read everybody's stuff; picked little man up tonight, so am pretty knackered and heading to bed now, will have a better look tomorrow. This is based on the fact that my ds, aged 2.5 is absolutely mad about the hairy bikers. We have it on dvd and he asks to watch them more than bob the builder or elmo. i guess it combines his 2 favourite things, food and motorbikes. When I put him to bed he always has to watch a bit downstairs with his whilst having his bottle, and then says, night night hairy bikers, night night hairy biker daddy, to which dh replys night night hairy biker son. So I guess I am hairy biker mummy?

Thanks stripteasle will do .

Hmmm I have issues with the word 'hairy'. Bring back Cubby!!

Aw cubby - (sorry - hairybiker -) - you're headline news!!

How is everyone tonight? Spoke with my friend and have just had a response to the email I sent the hypnotherapist. I think her response is really interesting....read below (NLP = neuro linguistic programming):

"I use a combination of NLP and hypnosis. NLP is a quick way to work with challenges you might be facing at a behavioural level, it is always important to discover and work with the root cause and also the wider system around the behaviour. That way you get a holistic understanding of how everything fits together. Enabling you to appreciate what motivates the behaviour, allowing you to release any beliefs that are no longer appropriate so that you can move forward easily and comfortably. I offer a pre session questionnaire - which I ask you to fill in with as much detail as possible. For the first session I usually like to take two hours so that I can discover as much information as I can to help you. After that clients decide whether they would like hourly or two hour sessions. Some clients come weekly, some bi weekly until the problem is resolved"

Bearing in mind I know this isn't a quick fix, it does sound like you try to get to the crux of the matter doesn't it...and not just mend the superficial problem?

Anyhoo, have spent today stripping wallpaper and have loved it(?)! Have car-boot sales and wallpapering lined up for tomorrow - possibly one of my best weekends (I LOVE DIY)!

Gerbra x

I don't think that email makes a lot of sense really gerbra. I tried braeking it down and reading it in sentences, but it's either really badly written or it's wishy-washy nonsense.

I don't know, maybe I've had too much to drink and I'm tired. Why do you think this route is more appealing than talking to your GP though?

I used to use NLP techniques, in comination with a range of others I may add, in my professional life.
All schools of thought can be useful as tools.

If you are just an over-indulger gebra, than fair enough, but then you should be able to stop easily yourself shouldn't you?

The thing with addiction is, speaking personally here, it is, for me outside of intellectualisations.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with therapy sessions- everyone should have them, and if you go for it I hope it helps, I really do.

I had a host of therapeautic techniques available to me as a professional worker, as well as a huge body of research on various things, including addictions, but I was still alcoholic.
But thats just me I suppose.

My post sounds really negative- I don't mean for it to be.

I suppose I drank differently to how you do Gebra, thats all. x

I suppose the basic point is I'm not ready (too scared) to go to the GP and what that will entail. I know it's stupid, but I just can't do it yet...

My major fear with cutting out the booze is sleeping at night. I've always found sleeping really really hard and am dreading the return of insomnia.

This was actually primarily what I was thinking about hypnotherapy for. If I could somehow get rid of the fear of how I will sleep, perhaps I will find myself better equipped in abstaining from the wine.

I know this whole hynotherapy things smacks (is 'smacks' right? It sounds right but looks wrong!) of denial - but while I'm still in denial, perhaps better to give it a go and at least try and remedy the sleep issue?

You've all made perfect sense - I guess now it's a matter of me facing up to my problem...

Gerbra x

Hello again,
Gerbra, don't be afraid of sleeping. An alcohol induced sleep is really just a body shut down. When you do stop drinking you will have perhaps three or four bad nights but then you will start sleeping like a baby, proper sleep with dreams as an added bonus. Do you dream at the moment?

I am still getting to grips with boozing too much. Last night I drank two whole bottle of Pinot Grigio - home alone and bored senseless. However I have cut down considerably since Xmas and can honestly say that sleep gets better. Even the dreams are sometimes raunchy. Shall I tell you the one about the BIG blue-eyed Polish builder? Perhaps not.

I was once tempted by AA but came to my senses just in time. I found Allen Carrs book "The easy way to stop drinking" was amazing. I stopped for two weeks straight after reading that, with no guilt, no withdrawal and amazingly no cravings. Stupidly I lent the book to a friend. I REALLY MUST READ IT AGAIN!

Kudzu helps with the cravings. Google it for more info. Also lovely ladies, keep taking the vitamins and milk thistle.

Good luck to one and all.

Gerbra, don't be disheartened . I understand why you don't want to talk to your GP. It took me a long time to do it, and it was as a last resort. If you feel good about the hypnotherapy and can afford it, then give it a shot.

Are you worried about your GP involving SS, or about having it on your notes? Or are you frightened that your GP will insist on treatments that you're not ready for. These are things that worried me, and that's why I didn't go until things go so bad that I didn't have a choice anymore.

We have something called Equinox in my area (SW London) and they are similar to the CAT that I go to, except you don't need a GP referral and what you tell them doesn't go on your medical notes. AFAICT they offer the same treatments as the CAT, but they don't talk in terms of alcoholism and will help you to control your drinking if you don't think you need to give up completely. I'm wondering if you might find this service easier.

As for sleeping problems, Isadora is right, you're not getting a healthy sleep if it's alcohol induced anyway. It's crap when you can't sleep though, so I sympathise with you there. I did have trouble last year when I was sober, but it passed after a few weeks and getting natural sleep really helped with my energy levels (unsurprisingly) and moodswings.

Isadora - what do you mean about coming to your senses just in time WRT AA? Do you mean that you decided you weren't an alcoholic? Or do you think it's a bad place or something? I hope this doesn't come across as confrontational. I just don't understand why trying an AA meeting would have been a bad thing for you.

Thanks for the info Isadora - you've done well to cut back (barring Pinot Grigiot-gate ).

Thanks Brassic - I can't honestly say why I'm so reluctant to go to my GP. Part of it I think is that my medical notes already read like a complete car crash and I don't know if I can face another trip with another admission of being out of control / addicted ...
Like you said too - I'm not sure if I'm ready to accept treatment as there's still part of me that thinks (hopes) I can get this under control myself and not give up alcohol altogether.

The Equinox service you mentioned does sound much less frightening and really helpful! I will definitely do some research and see if the service is available in my area. I like the idea of them helping you to 'control' your drinking.

Thank you . How are you doing? Hope you've had a good weekend.

Will probably pop in later on tonight - (I can't seem to keep away from this thread!)

Gerbra x