The Great Recovery part 2 - After Cancer treatment what next?

[TopOfTheCliff]

You may have finished treatment for cancer, be NED or in remission, or it’s just a lull between storms. You don’t want to dwell on the past but look forward to the future. You know you need to eat well, get fitter and pick up the strands of life again. This is the thread for you with fellow travellers. Join us!

There is the General Cancer thread for those in active treatment:
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/general_health/4969445-cancer-support-thread-92-christmas-happy-hour-at-the-patience-inn-7pm-tonight?page=10&reply=132553156

And there is the Stage IV thread for those whose treatment is ongoing:
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/life_limiting_illness/stage-iv-cancer-incurable-roll-up-roll-up-this-thread-is-for-you?reply=132555664

@MissMarplesNiece I mostly use Claude and ChatGPT just on the webpages, although I have downloaded the ChatGPT app to my phone. You can also ask it what you might be missing or what someone else taking a different approach might decide. You do have to play around with the questions to get the answers, it can sometimes take a while to get there. It can just give you extra insight into things you'd not thought about or realised. I think I remember seeing a study recently where AI was considered a more sympathetic partner for counselling type sessions than an actual online counsellor! (Though obviously it can't do things that face-to-face counselling with a proper relationship can do.)

@FairyWren7 yes I think you're completely right, I've spent years building up my business and being a lone parent including homeschooling DD for a year and a half when she was very anxious, and caring for my DPs, I feel like I've almost forgotten what it's like to relax and to enjoy life rather than it being a constant treadmill. Even this morning it's weird to get up and not feel there's a big pile of things for me to have to do! I think I've got four weeks before my job now in which I have got bits and pieces to finish off, but actually, I can just go to the gym every day pretty much if I want to, or see friends, or have day trips out. I feel like I'm only just managing to make the changes that I knew I needed to make when I was diagnosed with cancer, it's just taken me an extra two years to get here!

I've got tennis this morning then going round to my mum's to make lunch for her 91st birthday. DD is moving out of her student house today and my brother has to work so it's only me, but DD will take her around a picnic tomorrow, so she has two days of celebration.

@SierraSapphire and there’s also that cliched saying about people never wishing they had spent more time working. Obviously the bills need to be paid and family needs priority. But we need to have joy and at least feel ok the rest of the time!

It’s one of the things I always thought when travelling. So many people sitting about, just enjoying the day. They’ve got the right idea. I’ve always been a complete worker bee, and they usually drop down dead at the end of the summer!

#seizetheday!

Did you ever read or watch Remains of the Day? Such a powerful message about making the most of opportunities! :)

We’ve climbed a mountain all of us in the last few years and what do you do when you climb a mountain, you sit, admire the view, reflect on the achievement. Only then do you think about making your way back down again …
This is a good way of thinking FairyWren. I know in my case that I often feel there's so much I want to do/need to do that I race on to the next thing. I've come to the realisation I have FOMO but rarely really "experience" anything properly. I'm like one of those tourists that jumps off the tour bus, snaps the picture of the view then jumps straight back on the bus to move on to the next attraction.

What's your tattoo, @FairyWren7 ?

Thank you for the info @SierraSapphire . I'm going to try it out later.

@Penguinsa , I do admire your DD's energy .

@MissMarplesNiece

It’s a water symbol from an anime series. I really like it. Three of us are having them done today! It’s in black though.

I've not watched Remains of the Day Fairy - I'll look it out now I have more spare time 😂. Good luck with the tattoo! I have one on my stomach that my friend designed for me after I came out of an abusive relationship. It's a kind of Celtic sun design, which were fashionable when I had it done.

I love the mountain climbing analogy!

I think post treatment I really wanted things to be back to the way they were before and pushed too hard in that direction when I wasn't the 'me' I was before. I think mentally I would have benefited from a bit more time out before rushing back to the rat race.

Ooh nice tattoo @FairyWren7 . Do you have any others?

I've always liked tattoos despite not having any. I change my mind too quickly over what I want and have always said if I had an idea I'd wait six months....so far none have survived!

Where's @TopOfTheCliff gone? Was she off somewhere? I can't see anything in her last few posts, and she usually posts quite regularly.

@SierraSapphire I don't think there were any trips planned. Maybe she's got caught up in the house-sorting? I imagine her as someone who once she gets started with something doesn't let it go til she's satisfied!

Hope everything is well with her and there's no drama going on. I think she's had more than her fair share!

@ClashCityRocker its my first one! I have broken the seal I think. Next I’m going to get my arms toned and the reconstruction done and then I might get another, I’d like a fairy wren with the yellow wattle that’s the state flower.

I’m reviewing my progress! @TopOfTheCliff lovely words!

The whole going back to work derailed my getting fit/losing weight progress. However I feel like I’m making big strides with learning how to be happy again…

I’ve learned I need to prioritise myself and my health and sanity. Teaching is not the job for me anymore. I have other options, Community Diploma nearly signed off and when I get back from the UK I will start applying again/do some volunteering/get back in touch with the charity who offered me a role that was too far away to see if anything else comes up.

I really love painting, drawing and writing.

I need to grow more of a community in Australia - I’ve got two good friends, some great ex-colleagues, a few other connections I can cultivate and the art group around the corner. Plus the cosplayers/Jarod’s photography lot. I’ve still got great relationships with friends and family in the UK. I aim to come back in the summer when I have the opportunity and the cash!

I have real opportunities to have an enriching life. I just hope I continue to go ok and my blood test comes back ok. Although I suspect I have vitamin d absorption issues. Can a gluten intolerance prevent you absorbing vitamins? I think I need to do FODMAP and just see how I feel on it.

I’m not going to push myself too much until the reconstruction is done. I need to pace myself!

That sounds sensible @FairyWren7 and I totally relate to work getting in the way of things! For me, it wasn't just the time working, it was the whole headspace thing and feeling like I was juggling too many spinning plates.

Morning all (unless it is evening in your time zone!). I haven’t been anywhere, just busy. All my favourite people were doing a 100 mile bike ride yesterday for the local cancer charity but I am not yet fit enough so was on dog walking duty. I felt a bit left out but took the opportunity to visit DM91 who is lonely. Physically she is well and sprightly but mentally she is losing the plot. She hears people talking and thinks there are a crew of friendly ghosts visiting her at night to sing and chat. She regaled me with some story about pruning a big tree which the ghosts had told her. At least they make her feel she isn’t alone.
Also I cleaned and oiled a teak deck chair, painted a window frame in the kitchen and put back all the jars and tins in the store cupboard. I’m about halfway round the kitchen. It doesn’t look much different but I know it’s cleaner and tidier!
Today I am off on a moderate bike ride. I feel a bit daunted about moving my fitness up to the next level but I am definitely improving slowly.
I agree about trying to savour life instead of rushing through it. I suppose having faced our mortality we know we might be on limited time so are trying to cram in as much as we can, and by doing so may miss out on the slower pleasures.
@SierraSapphire in a former life I was doing a Sports Medicine qualification. I got halfway then my life blew up and I realised I wasn’t going to complete it. It was hard to accept but right to drop out. Sunk costs indeed.
Have a good Monday folks. I’ll set up thread three soon.

Hi everyone
Just wanted to share that this morning I went for my 1st 🏊‍♂️ post chemo.
I was nervous but I did enjoy it!
Just going to build up steadily.

@Zoopet fab news! Well done and keep going!

Well done @Zoopet with the swimming.

I love reading about all your trips - @ClashCityRocker fantastic you went kayaking in Norway and great photos! @Penguinsa as always, wonderful photos of your travels! @FairyWren7 beautiful photos you posted too! Sorry if I've forgotten to mention other photos someone posted. I really enjoy seeing them all and reading your posts.

@TopOfTheCliff what a relief the ghosts your DM hears are at least friendly ones that keep her company. Still heartbreaking when a loved one loses the plot.

Well done Zoopet with the swimming. Love swimming.

I seem to have caught COVID but it's been mild and mainly feeling out of it rather than I'll so just been taking it easy, taste and smell have returned just lingering dizziness now. Didn't have the last vaccination but it's been mild. Lots of coughing on plane so think that's where I got it.

DD is off to Kefalonia on 4th with boyfriend and DH has 5 weeks off. Some plants ordered to arrive tomorrow from RHS, normally arrive very late but hopefully will plant on Thursday if well enough. Nearly caught up on sleep now.

Another well done from me on the swimming @Zoopet - I remember starting again with my Lycra swimming hat after chemo to not end up pulling it what hair was left!

I did a three mile run yesterday, I'm fine with stamina from swimming, tennis and the gym, but needing to watch my twingy hamstring. I'm finally seeing a physio next week.

Both my grandmas were hallucinating things towards the end of their lives @TopOfTheCliff - one was convinced that the phone was ringing in the middle of the night - we even got BT to investigate and it wasn't - and the other a smell that no one else could smell. My DM (91 last weekend) isn't at that stage but her memory is appalling.

I've just done a yoga class and had breakfast, will do swim and spa in the rain in a while, DD is in Nice, so I'm pretty envious!

Good job on the swimming @Zoopet

I remember my first time after treatment, I was so chuffed I managed to do five lengths. It is daunting in the early days.

Sorry you've come back with the Covid @penguinsa but glad it seems to be a mild dose. Try and take it easy though!

My father has had his prostate operation today and all seems to have gone well. He's a bit groggy and a bit of pain where they went in. He was incredibly anxious the night before which isn't like him at all - he's managed to get to 68 with very little medically wrong with him so this is his first hospital stay...lucky bugger! It has been handy having experience of interpreting hospital letters though as him and my stepmother were a bit baffled by it all. She's a bit of a dragon but in a good way, so I'm confident that she can advocate for him if needed, but she needs to know what's happening etc. my dad is much more of an ostrich type so I'm glad he's got her.

Hope the Covid stays mild @Penguinsa and your DD doesn’t catch it before her trip.
I tried to take DH off on a boating mini adventure on Tuesday but he cunningly sabotaged our departure so we missed the tide! In the end we came home early and met a good friend for dinner instead and had a nice time so all was well.
I have been working hard on my fitness and I reckon I’m about 80 percent back to where I was before cancer now. I just need to keep plodding along (and lose a bit more weight). I am always impatient with the slowness of progress, but I am getting somewhere now!

Great you are making such good progress Top, we all seem to be making good progress, well done us all.

COVID thankfully staying mild, and DD has avoided and off on holiday tomorrow to Kefalonia with her boyfriend. Floof is wanting to go too. My diet has been on hold past few days with it but am within about a pound of normal BMI so happy with that and have just been eating maintain calories, a lot of haagen dazs 🍨. Plants arrived today and hope can do them tomorrow and have meeting for DS. Did apply for a job today though not sure it's sensible with op looming.

My DSD has just got engaged to her lovely Indian BF so we have sent chocolates to his DPs and they have sent us a fabulous basket of Diwali sweets. My election night will be spent trying not to overeat gulab jamun and lovely green pistachio things! It’s so lovely to have some positive uplifting news. Maybe there will be a 3 day wedding!
I went on an extremely hilly bike ride with DH this morning. I am now broken! My knees are sore and I can’t walk up stairs. Luckily I don’t need to.
Hope the rest of you are being a bit more sensible!
Happy voting x

Congrats on your DSD's engagement Top love Indian weddings. I did 3 hours gardening with DH despite tail end of covid and only stopped when started to feel about to pass out but thankfully was fine after a few minutes and a bath. Got a lot done 2 green bins filled though didn't get to plant the plants. DH says will do tomorrow. Had meeting for DS. DD now on holiday in Kefalonia and going well. Watching election.

@TopOfTheCliff what lovely news! So much to be thankful for!

Just woken up to see info about labour landslide for the UK all over the media.

We’re in the Barossa Valley today - a lovely wine growing region. I’ve not got any pics of it yet as we got here late.

But below is a pic from alligator gorge in SA. And the husband at a very big old copper mine!