Cancelling surgery due to fear of general anaesthesia

[Witchinabottle]

hi there everyone,

I have had surgery before which includes two C Sections ( 1 emergency, 1 planned) plus an assisted delivery.

Although I’ve had regional anaesthesia before, I’ve not had a GA. I’m 52.

I have elective surgery for a hernia and some reconstructive surgery book for later this week coming. So it’s major abdominal surgery- around 3 hours and 4 procedures in total.

I am so terrified of GA that I’ve put off this surgery for many years. I also didn’t fully realise that 30 seconds after the drugs, you stop breathing . Not only are you unconscious but you cannot breathe without a machine and a tube inserted into your trachea.

I like to understand what is happening to my body so I watched a video of the process and I am beyond horrified; it looked exactly like a scene from Alien . I felt so sick watching it. I’ve been shaking and not eating all last week.

I do want the surgery and I don’t care about the recovery pain as much, just the GA.

To me, it seems so unnatural and weird. It fills me with absolute horror and I can’t can’t find any way to bring myself to do it. Just absolutely not. For me, it’s akin to death and I can’t cope with the anxiety of it. ( Obviously if it was an emergency or life - threatening it would be different)

I have a last blood test tomorrow and my blood pressure is a little elevated at around 143/80 ( approx) . Not too high but I’m concerned.

I am not asking for anyone to really advise me, just perhaps people’s experiences if they would be kind and willing to share.

Thank you so much, really appreciate it if you explain to me how to ever overcome such terror. And I am too terrified- I expect I will cancel. Which is a shame as I know my quality of life will be fantastic with the surgery. But I can’t find the strength to do it.

My husband of 20 years walked out on me and my 3 teenage children last year after an affair and is divorcing me. I have little support and live in a small town so it’s not ideal.

I suffer from an anxiety disorder and as I’ve put this for what, 16 years, I can’t get passed the whole notion of no consciousness and not being able to breathe on your own. It’s not the risks as such but the whole idea of losing control and your body in well- a state of semi death.

It’s too frightening for words for me and I can’t face it. Not just the fear of not waking up, but the whole concept of being absent from your body in that way.

Thank you so much for anyone who is happy to reply. I am not looking for advice or to be persuaded, just what others have experienced. x

I've had loads of GA's.

I simply don't think about it but I'm good at being in denial :)

I've had an emergency GA. The anaethetist put the drug in and said I would feel woozy. I didn't feel anything. I was just about to say it is not working then I woke up in recovery. Apparently I'd been in recovery for 2 hours but have no memory of it. I felt wonderful afterwards. You will be absolutely fine.

Hypnosis is your friend

I’ve had GAs for 2 caesarians as I preferred that to having the spinal (had that for 2 as well).
you really won’t know anything about it. I watched my daughter being put to sleep under a GA and it was really quite peaceful. Could you ask for some diazepam this week to keep you calmer?

Remember the people who are going to be dealing with your anesthesia are highly educated and trained professionals. You will be monitored non stop the whole time. They do this every single day, probably sometimes several times. They wouldn’t put you under if they felt there was something in your health history that wouldn’t allow it.

My DH had a five hour surgery recently and his team were great. They did offer him something to relax him in pre-op, not sure if that will be an option for you, but take it if it’s offered!

You will be ok!

You won't be absent from your body, your heart is still beating, your brain is still working, you won't know anything about the operation with a ga, the anaesthetist will come and speak to you before the operation and put your mind at rest. You can ask the doctor for a sleeping tablet for the night before, the tube is to take over your breathing, you won't know its there but you can have a bit of a sore throat afterwards. What is it that frightens you, your health will benefit, the staff will look after you, stop looking at videos and think about the positives. I have had a few ga and the only side effect for me was being cold afterwards due to the length of the op and the temperature in the theatres but I had plenty of blankets and hot drinks when I woke up.

I had a GA while in hospital to remove placenta from a 20 week miscarriage in June. I was terrified like you and kept thinking I would never wake up. I asked my husband to make sure he claimed life insurance. I was so sure I'd die. I was very unwell and my blood pressure was much higher than yours and I had an infection but i woke up. You'll be fine. I was injected with the GA. It's total blackness and oblivion within seconds, and you wake up and the procedure is all over. I had no soreness from the breathing tube and was able to get up pretty quickly. You'll be fine. The anaesthetist said 99 year olds with dodgy hearts are usually fine, which made me worry a lot less! To me it did feel like what dying will be like, no awareness and non existence but it's made me feel less scared if anything!

I’ve had three GAs. It’s the best sleep I’ve ever had 😬

I think you’ve loooed ip too much detail. GA may be kinda gross but loads of things are kinda gross.

It’s better than a hernia! You’re nuts to worry anout the GA.

Flipping heck, what video made it look like alien?! As an anaesthetist I know I’d be much more weirded out by being numb enough for a c-section…if you managed that ok, a straightforward elective GA should be a breeze!

I love a GA. I am aware that sounds weird, but I really enjoy the feeling of going to sleep knowing that I will wake up and all the bad stuff has been taken care of.

I suffer with multiple mental health issues including severe anxiety, panic attacks and agoraphobia and the worst bit about having an operation for me is actually leaving the house, then the waiting, not the surgery.

I've not had many surgeries, only 5, but thank god I've only had good experiences, apart from one when my BP dropped low, but I was so out of it, I wasn't really aware so yeah ...

Please don't stress, they know what they are doing, the breathing thing, you know nothing about it plus, thousands and thousands of operations are done every single day. You'll be fine.

Thank you so much for your messages. I know my fears are rather irrational to an extent.

I could request some diazapam from the hospital tomorrow when I see them- that’s a good idea yes.

I think everything about a GA scares me. Just the notion of being unconscious and not being able to breathe except via a machine. I just don’t think I can get past the concept. Obviously I’m not talking about emergency situations- then I would welcome it.

I have had some bad experiences in the past with surgery. My emergency section was awful due to obstructed labour and I was neglected. The hospital apologised for their mistakes. So I have birth trauma there, plus I had 3 children in as many years so I am fearful of any further medical intervention. I thought never again!

Long past sections aside- I was fine with regional anaesthetic. Just not a GA. But thank for replying, it’s so lovely to read of other’s positive experiences! 🙏

Let someone else who needs it, stop taking space from other people who need it so yes cancel. I’m terrified of GA and surgery. I’ve been rushed in and told I needed it ASAP I cried my eyes out but it had to be done, so I would still do it if it was needed. So tell them to give the appointment to someone else who needs it till you can sort yourself out

Maybe it helps for me that 3 close friends of mine became anaesthetists. They are absolutely fantastic people and so intelligent. Also so practical; they can build and make things too. One of them did a podcast about his job and it was so lovely. He takes such good care of his patients.

You don't have much support or anyone to look after you, thats clear. You're used to having to get through life solo. Please, please go ahead with this. Talk to the anaesthetist and the nurses. Try to trust them to look after you.

I've had several GAs. No problems.

The anaesthetist will come to see you before your operation and you can discuss any concerns with them then. They are highly trained and educated people. They do this for a living day in, day out.

You are very closely monitored under general anaesthetic, never left alone.

I've had 2 and both were fine - much easier than local anaesthetic where you know what's going on and can still partially feel stuff (& I've had 8 of those!)

The pre-med calms you down and going under is v quick and not scary, nor is coming round - everyone was so lovely

If your quality of life will be so much better it is massively worth it

OP, I wouldn't normally go into too much detail on fear of making you feel worse - but as you've watched the surgery being performed I think that ship may have sailed!

I had a massive surgery a couple of years ago. I'd had very short GAs before that, one for teeth out and one for an endoscopy.

I knew I was going to be 'out' for hours (turned out to be 7!) and I was, frankly, terrified I wouldn't wake up.

I couldn't bring myself to even tell anyone, because I felt like saying it out loud would have made it even more real.

So what I did, was I focused on the next thing in the process, and refused to think about anything else. I pushed it out of my head, very forcefully, every time I started thinking about 'what if'.

So in your situation, I would be allowing myself to think about driving to the hospital for the blood test. When I get there, I'd be thinking about the blood test. Then driving home.

Now remember, the trick for me was thinking ONLY about the next thing on the list. As though that's the only thing happening, nothing else afterwards.

Then I'd think about packing my bag.

Then the drive to the hospital.

Then walking to the right place in the hospital.

Then the weighing and measuring they do immediately before.

Then getting changed into a gown.

Then walking to the theatre.

Then the lying on the bed.

(at this point the anaesthetist asked me how I was, and I said 'scared', she was lovely and very understanding.)

Then the cannula going in.

Then the pre med.

At this point the next thing was the thing I was scared of, obviously.

So this is the point where I cried. Everyone understood what was going on, and why I was crying, they were nice, and kind, and the anaesthetist held my hand and stroked it, and told me to cry it all out and I gradually fell asleep.

And then I woke up. And it was all over.

When you have an anaesthetic you have at least an anesthetist (sometimes 2) and an anaesthetic assistant -me (nurse or ODP) who will stay with you the whole time and whose job it is just to look after you whilst your under anaesthesia.
They will look after your breathing, monitor your vital signs and use medication to adjust if necessary. You are never left on your own.
They are highly skilled and very well trained. There are emergency procedures in place should anything unexpected come up.
Anaesthesia in this country is very safe.

Thank you so much granny did your kind words. You were very brave. x

You know you are being unreasonable. I had a GA and it was absolutely fantastic - the best sleep I've ever had. I'd seriously have GA regularly, if I could. You know nothing about it and wake up in recovery. If you seriously want to live in pain and discomfort rather than go through a painless, straightforward procedure, then I genuinely don't understand your thinking, OP.

Theatre nurse manager here...you will be in the best possible hands. Anaesthetists are highly skilled and trained. You'll be monitored so well that any change in your vitals are identified immediately and acted upon.

The notion of being on a ventilator is daunting but it's very common practice and is obviously a necessity. It's done thousands of times a minute across the world with little to no adverse effects.

Consent and risks are discussed with every person and can sound scary, but I suppose you have to weigh up is it worth taking the risk?

A bit like weighing up taking the risk getting behind the wheel of a car or going on holidays or doing anything risky really - if you knew the stats or the potential dangers you might think twice! But you still need to drive and still like to holiday.

Be honest with your anaesthetic team and tell them you're anxious and nervous. They'll talk things through with you and you can request Midazolam to relax you, by the time that's hit you, you're in a good place lol.

Most people wake up and feel they've been asleep for like 2 minutes and can't believe it's all over.

All the best

You won't be aware of the breathing or the machine. You won't be aware of anything, which imo is the best part.

My 12 year old DD is terrified of anything medical and she needed a GA last year. I've never seen her so frightened but upon waking up said it was the best sleep she had ever had and didn't know what she was so worried about!

I do understand that it’s safe. I don’t think it’s about risk as such- it’s the process.

For me, it is the unnatural concept of unconsciousness and inability to breathe alone and tubes etc. That isn’t normal and reminds me of death. The knowledge that a GA is a coma too. It’s not sleep at all. So I just can’t even pretend I’m going for a nap or to fool myself!

sorry I know I’m catastrophising! I suffer anxiety and panic and been diagnosed so I really struggle with it.

Even under GA tha majority of people are breathing under their own steam, albeit with airway support and oxygen.
When you go for your pre-op assessment, please bring up your anxiety. The pre-op nurses may be able to answer some questions, or may be able to arrange for you to talk to an anaesthetist about your fears

I LOVE a GA. I've had three to date (plus another procedure under sedation which was akin to a GA). They're so relaxing. The feeling of going under is fabulous (woozy and happy and comforting) and then just as you come round the same feeling is there. It's bliss. I was pretty fearful of my first ever GA as I was mid-30s and had never had one before, but in the event it was great.

I’m sure you can’t be as bad as me when anxiety kicks in
I’ve only had 1 GA operation in 66yrs (🙏)

Lucky for me, it was in private hospital wether that helped my thinking I don’t know 🤷‍♀️

I just remember walking to theatre and getting on the bed. Anaesthetist saying little scratch
That was it

They woke me up in recovery, moved back into room and fell asleep again
brilliant