Problem/Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support III

[ornamentalhaggis]

Time for a new thread already!

Welcome to the thread, the purpose of this is to give anyone who is having any trouble with their drinking, a safe place to come and post about it honestly and without judgement.

There are many of us that use the thread for support and encouragement: some in recovery, others just needing a place to share about their worries. It's been going on in one form of another for a while now and has helped many people.

Thank you to all of those who have kept it going thus far, and welcome to anyone who has decided the time has come to ask for help.

Everybody's welcome, no matter what stage your drinking is at.

Jump right in, the water's fine

kokeshi

Night night gerbra, you've done really well.

13 years. i have tried many many different treatments. the only thing that helped me stop doing it for more than 7 days at a time were NLP and anti depressants. but even those dont help stick it out.

my dh knows i do bulimia (sometimes) but we never ever talk about it. he sometimes tries to help me or talk me out of it but he doesnt realise that is too late to start changing the situation. we never talk about it on a psychological level though.
i feel like the only thing that will help me is a 24h a day mentor. but i know that that job is too hard for any person.
some of the thinks you wrote here kokeshi rang with me because i did manage to stop doing bulimia here and there for 3 weeks at a time and i understand that the more days you dont binge the better in the aggregate you can feel.

i noticed that many of your dhs or dps know of your drinking problem. do they help you with your problem? or does it add to your stress to know that they know?

Thanks Gerbra I'm going to be catching up on my missing hour soon too.

Idontwantto drink is like my chocolate. I use it to celebrate or commiserate. No wonder I've a problem. If I want it there always seems to be excuse to have it.

HAve you heard of Overeater's Anonymous? They are a fellowship specifically for people who want to stop compulsive eating. Again, like drinking, it's the maintenance of abstinence from eating compulsively that food addicts struggle with. The offer a programme of recovery, meetings and importantly perhaps for you - sponsorship: someone who will guide you through the 12 step programme and be there when you need her. The sponsors are compulsive eaters in recovery and will be available when you need them, until you don't need them so much.

Here's the UK website

Here's the online US site, for all things OA. It's a bit cheesy with the bird but has loads of fantastic online support and resources.

thank you kokeshi. i went to a meeting once and didnt think it suited me. i also dont have any time to go to the meetings. (sad but true). there is no magic formula is there.

Hi Idontwant to- a huge amount of people have lots of different issues going on don't they? I suppose for us all there are root causes and emotional disturbances that link in to our compulsions and/ or addictions.

thank you i will read through that

yes teasle, reading through your thread, if i rewrote binge eating everytime you mentioned drink or alcohol it would be quite similar to an eating disorders thread.

addictions are painful things

That's why the online thing might be more up your street I think. It's a bit difficult to navigate but you can get some email support or online chats if that's more up your street. It depends on how active your life is, I guess, and how much it interferes with it.

Have you tried CBT?

It's a tricky one I think, compulsive eating, because being sober is clear cut. You either are or you aren't. You can obviously give up food so it's always going to be more tricky to deal with. What have you found helps? HAve you ever talked to others in your situation?

you can't give up food obviously!

I heard someone who had an eating disorder saying something similar to that Kokeshi- that with an addict, ie alcoholic say, you wouldn't tell them that they could just have one glass or whatever of alcohol a day, but with food, you HAVE to eat, you can't just abstain- really compounds the issue.

Yes, addictions are painful.

I know someone who is both alcoholic and bulemic, also suffers from OCD type behaviours.

bulemic? bulimic!

yes you can't give up food. you have to change the way you think (at least thats what i have to do). the NLP (hypnosis based sessions) really helped me. this was the first time after 9 years of trying different treatments, that i could smell baked bread and not have a craving. (like if every time you saw a glass you craved alcohol). this helped me deal with part of it. i also started taking anti depressants with partially help as well, because they stop me from looping myself into negative thoughts. what i can figure out is - i have most of this straightened out in my head, i dont devalue myself like i once did, in fact i like myslef, i take care of myslef in all other respects than food (i used to not be capable of that), i am trained at sensing when i am subsconscioulsy setting myself up for bingeing, my status is changes since now i have a dh who really really cares about me whereas i was once alone etc etc. but i just cant stop doing it. i feel like the addiction was once primarily psychological and is now primarily physical.

thats i was looking at your thread. i was wondering if there is a magic method for overcoming the physical addiction. on the ED threads we focus mainly on our psychology past and present.
the part about not being able to give up food altogether doesnt work. i tried it and it does help me stop doing bulimia but i end up far too thin, and almost anorexic (not truly anorexic since i can still eat)

In order to maintain my sobriety, I have to do similar things- its all about the thought processes behind isn't it? All the problems, resentments and blame issues I used to have a drink on. I have to be very aware of my thinking, recognise those patterns that if left unchecked will lead me to possibly having a drink. I have to deal with my emotions in a healthy way, not by drinking on them, and that means feeling them, living with them.

Night all x

I know OA advocate having an eating plan that avoids trigger foods. I think there's a theory that some of us are more sugar sensitive than others so these cravings (for food and drink) can actually really powerful AND physical.

Trigger foods for a lot of people seem to be any white processed food. Simple carbohydrates, like white bread, white flour, etc that make or blood sugar levels spike. HAve you thought about trigger foods? Of course it's all well and good having the theories about why you eat/drink or what leads you to the behaviour but it's the action that has the most impact. By that I mean just sitting though these really strong impulses. Unfortunately there are not magical cures for any addiction/compulsion, just a long journey of self-discovery.

Can I ask which AD you were on? I know they prescribe Fluoxetine at about 80mg daily to help bulimics with the compulsion. The don;t seem to know how or why this works so I'm interested if this is what you've been prescribed?

Night teasle

Hi all haven't been in a while. I have been lurking mind. I have signed up to open university, will start in May so hopefully that will help.

I'm still drinking quite often, but hope to stop soon (hmm). Well not really, because I still enjoy it, it's the only fecking enjoyment I get in my life. I hate my life.

how are all the Monday night abstainers (and anyone who didn't) this morning? Reday for a Tuesday alcohol free night?

I feel quite good this morning, yoga, home for some supper and bed with cup of tea and book - was up crazily early for work (4.30am, nice!) but feel good.

I caught myself going down one of my usual anxiety trains of thoughd and I actually made myself sort of feel the pain, for want of a better word. and I did! instead of straight away shying away from it, I let myself think the thought and then sort of let it go, that feels like progress to me

I didn't abstain. I had two small glasses of wine, the same as DH. And then stopped. So I didn't drink to excess. But I didn't abstain.

Well done to gerbrajess, dinny and everyone else.

that's great, Coco! you should be pleased with yourself! what you up to today?