Problem/Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support III

[ornamentalhaggis]

Time for a new thread already!

Welcome to the thread, the purpose of this is to give anyone who is having any trouble with their drinking, a safe place to come and post about it honestly and without judgement.

There are many of us that use the thread for support and encouragement: some in recovery, others just needing a place to share about their worries. It's been going on in one form of another for a while now and has helped many people.

Thank you to all of those who have kept it going thus far, and welcome to anyone who has decided the time has come to ask for help.

Everybody's welcome, no matter what stage your drinking is at.

Jump right in, the water's fine

kokeshi

I've caught myself thinking that as I was good last night and did not drink I can drink tonight after all. Tell me that is skewed thinking please. Wouldn't turn down a cold glass of white wine right now.

Thanks kokeshi for the link.

And I'm so pleased it was good news, expat .

Earlier you mentioned that you moved to the uk to get away from your hard-drinking lifestyle. I was wondering if that wasn't making things difficult for yourself given our binge-drink culture?

Coco your thinking is skewed.

Catch up with you all later x

hello again flowertop, good to see you! Don't be afraid to post though, use this thread for whatever purpose you want.

Coco, you only really get a glimpse of sobriety doing it for one day then drinking the next. The real recovery comes when you start to feel more at one with yourself and totally detox from drink. The first night is usually the worst withdrawals wise, so we can start to think that it's representative of how sobriety really is. If I still felt as bad as I did when I began my recovery I would honestly not have stuck with it. One day is great, but a number of days in a row will really make such a difference to your outlook. The white knuckle sobriety of first coming off drink - like holding your breath really - is just not what I experience anymore.

Where are all those abstainers then???

Hi Kokeshi,
Im here, how are you?
Am already feeling slightly anxious! I don't generally have my first drink until later so I've not hit 'that moment' yet, but DP has gone out on a leaving do and will be back a little worse for wear. This would normally be the excuse for me to join him when he gets home so this worries me a bit!

Anyone else abstaining - how are you doing?
Gebrax

hello, I will be abstaining tonight too

have managed to not drink since Wed 27th (last week)

feeling the fog lift a bit today, I think...feel much more positive than I did last week that I can do this, it doens't seem so daunting a prospect.

Coco, new book to keep you busy

I am going to yoga at 8.30, that always makes me not really want to drink. good luck, all. anyone watching Damages later? Dinny x

That's great dinny, it's definitely a cumulative effect, both mentally and physically. I don;t think we ever stop reaping the rewards from being sober.

Gerbra, what have you got to distract yourself with? Have you planned dinner? Do you have anything nice to drink which is non-alcoholic? Chocolate? Sweets? These can help to stave off cravings too.

Try to go top bed early if your DH is going to be coming in pissed, it's no fun being in the company of drunk folk when you're sober.

Kokeshi - Great advice to be tucked up in bed before DP gets home, just hope I'll be able to sleep!
Have drunk lots of water today (haven't spent this long on the loo for a long time...) and have redbush tea and raspberry squash to drink. Didn't think about chocolate but there are choc mousses in the fridge if I need a sweet kick!
Pasta planned for dinner and a nice hot bath later with my book (which I've been trying to read for ages but usually too p*d when I get to bed).
Still feel positive, but maybe not quite as positive as I did this morning!
Good on you Dinny - that's a good stretch, and really good to hear you're feeling the benefits, will help other people to hear that i'm sure...
Gerbra x

HEy, there are less than 4 hours of today left so you've done the majority of it! See it through to the end and you'll feel really pleased with yourself.

BAth and book sounds wonderful, enjoy.

hello (waves shyly). I thought I'd join in your "happy monday" night as well. A bit of extra incentive for me.

I'm glad everyone is being so positive, it's very encouraging.

I thought of Teasles post about having to cope with your emotions without a drinking prop, earlier this evening when I was in a downward thinking spiral, (and all the other nice posts I have had)and it really helped. So thank you.

And although I don't know you expat, but please accept my many congratulations for you and your "little bean".

Well done Jaoi

Hello everyone

It's so nice to see so many people give it a go tonight. I've been sober since last Monday. It's a relief to be sober tonight too.

Tomorrow I have an appointment at the addiction clinic. My memory is rubbish and I got a bit confused about the date. Luckily I checked today and it's tomorrow. I am not downing bottles of vodka every night but alcohol has caused me so much grief (even in small amounts) I would love to give it up altogether.

Many of my worst experiences have had alcohol involved at some level. It makes me realise how powerful it is that it keeps hurting me and yet I still go back for more.

Hi again jaoi, great to see you. It's definitely the thinking in my case that has lead to a relapse, and not always right away.

It can start days before, working slowly but surely, I subconsciously started to make it easier for myself to lift a drink.

I try to identify this thinking now at the earliest stage, and deal with it accordingly, by talking about it and not letting it fester in my mind.

How's everyone feeling so far?

Cross-posted with you there jellibabe. Good for you for making inroads, that's such a positive step forward and half the battle is allowing people to help you. Is this a private clinic? Have you had experience of these before?

It's not private (or I would probably be featuring in Hello). The clinic is run by the NHS in partnership with the council. I have never been to one before so it's all new. I have found them very understanding and helpful so far. Although I was very worried about the stigma of approaching them in the beginning.

I've been to different NHS treatment centres - residential and day patient - and they both helped me immensely because I was ready to do something about it. My understanding of my drink problem deepened after each attempt at getting sober and was all part of my journey. If you have any questions, thought or worries, please share them with us on here.

Kokeshi I have tried many times to deal with my problem on my own but after many failed attempts I realise I cannot do it alone.

Lost count of the number of times I've though to myself 'That's it. I'm never touching alcohol again'. Yet after a couple of days I'm buying it again.

Strangely though I worry that my problem is not serious enough and that I am wasting their time.

HI everyone.
Jellibabe- that sentence could have been me- I tried SO many times to sort out my drinking by myself, but in the end i had to admit I needed help, and get it.

At the time it seemed awful, but it was the best thing I ever did- be honest and admit i needed some help.

Oh god, it's never too early to deal with a drink problem, especially if you've recognised a definite pattern to it. Just because you're not a gutter drink makes no difference, it's a progressive thing with us and very rarely gets spontaneously better. Denisl keeps us going right into the depths and to admit this to yourself at this stage is a huge advantage for you.

Yes, definately.

Hello K, how are you tonight oh diminutive wooden one?

Haha, no bad! I jjst realied that my last post was a bit wide of the mark - Denis L wasn't responsible for anything . How goes it for you?

I did snigger at denisl leading us all into the depths...

Am going to watch Gavin and Stacey now on BBC3 as I missed it last night.

hi guys. i am not an alcoholic but i am bulimic. i was reading through your thread wondering if ill find similarities in food addiction as alcohol addiction.

i find the hardest time to avoid bingening is when i am bored. when i have time and there is nothing else i can muster up the energy to do.

and i know that if i binge it will pass the time well.

do any of you feel that way?

I'm watching that thng about the day patient psychiatric ward - Poppy Shakespeare - and smiling wryly to myself. I wonder if my psychiatrist pal is watching it! Enjoy Gavin and stacey.

Just popping back before I go to bed (I haven't been to bed this early for a while!). Have had a bath and don't feel any really sharp urge for a drink, although there's definitely a very strong feeling that something's missing...sleep will be the big challenge I think.
Hope everyone's doing okay - well done anyone who's managed tonight...it's been harder than I thought, but at the same time easier than I thought (no, I can't work that one out either!). Jellibabe, just want to say good luck at the clinic tomorrow.
Gerbra x

dwtgoob, welcome to the thread. I believe many people who've had problems with drink also have other compulsions - food being a major one with women. HAve you had any treatment so far? How long ahve you been engaging in this behaviour?