Problem/Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support III

[ornamentalhaggis]

Time for a new thread already!

Welcome to the thread, the purpose of this is to give anyone who is having any trouble with their drinking, a safe place to come and post about it honestly and without judgement.

There are many of us that use the thread for support and encouragement: some in recovery, others just needing a place to share about their worries. It's been going on in one form of another for a while now and has helped many people.

Thank you to all of those who have kept it going thus far, and welcome to anyone who has decided the time has come to ask for help.

Everybody's welcome, no matter what stage your drinking is at.

Jump right in, the water's fine

kokeshi

Daisy, sorry you've had a bad day, that sounds really difficult. Sorry for my ignorance but can you not take prescribed ADs whilst pregnant? Surely if you've experienced such sever PND before they'll be monitoring your situation?

How about your GP? Did you say that you wanted to go for counselling? I know you mentioned AA briefly before, and I think it may help you to have somewhere to go just to get a bit of support when you're feeling like this. It's free therapy! It's not just for folks that are still struggling with drinking, there are long term member there 10, 20, 30 years sober and can pass on valuable advice. Isolation is a nightmare for us. Just a thought anyway.

I'd recommend AA for anyone who finds themselves isolated and alone, or doesn't have much support in real life with drinking. Actually even if you do have a really caring considerate partner, no-one can understand what we go through like another problem drinker.

Thinking of you Daisy, and hope you find a solution. In the meantime, use this thread to vent if you need to. That's what it's for! Be kind to yourself.

Oh Daisy, that sounds awful.
Do go to the GPs and be really honest about how you feel. I hope you feel better tonight.x

I'll check in later- horrid DS1 wants to use the computer, darn him.
Kepps saying 'Ma have ye finished on the computer- you've been on it a canny while' in his Geordie accent. Grr

thanks

DH is home now so the pressure is off a bit. I spoke to my GP when I was there last Monday and she felt it was better to keep off the ADs, at least in the first trimester, but they would monitor me closely. I guess it's up to me to go and see her and tell her how I feel. I'll make an appointment on Monday and see about getting referred back to the consultant I was under just after I'd had DD. In fact I can probably phone them myself, but I have this stupid thing about pretending to the world that everything is fine, and not wanting to admit that I'm struggling

I'm nursing some chamomile and peppermint tea; it's actually quite nice

am off with my knitting and for an early bed.

Anyone about then?

i'm still lurking teasle, but about to slope off to bed. I feel physically and mentally exhausted after today.

shite, DD has woken up right on cue. she seems to have a telepathic ability to know when I want to sleep......

have a good weekend and I hope everyone is doing OK.

Hi teasle

Have just got the kids to bed so have a few quite moments to myself.

Everything you put in your post described exactly how I feel. I am quite an emotional person and am definitely led by my feelings.

Work was fine. Once I got through the door and sat at my desk the trauma was over. My colleagues were really nice to me so that was great. I'm not going to explain why I was off (apart from to say I have/had depression) because I don't really think most people would understand. Glad in some ways to be back to my normal routine. However I also understand more why I struggle.

Have also joined CAT so if anyone would like to contact me please feel free.

I'm here, what's up teasle? I'm just watching Kill Bill. I feel a bit restless myself tonight, don't know what's up with me. Daisy, I totally get the whole putting on a face for the world thing, I do exactly the same. It's just difficult to admit we need help sometimes isn't it?

Oh, I met another couple of drinkers the other day who said that they certainly use knitting as an distraction from cravings and boredom. I never learned. Hope you manage to get some sleep.

Hey jellibabe, glad you had a successful day at work.

Hi Daisy hope your feeling better. Have a good weekend too . I am determined this one at least will be a sober one.

I am thrilled it's over frankly. Do you have any plans for this weekend OH?

HI Jellibabe!

Glad work went ok, its totally up to you what you want to say or not say. I often agonise over what I post because its so very one dimensional, its hard to guage sometimes.
I don't post when i'm down because I don't want people to think I'm a nutter, and I don't really know what to write when I'm feeling good cos I don't want to come across as all super-hunky-dory-recovering -alki-with -the scary light -shining-from -her eyes...type thing.

Am actually sat at the computer with a sort of tarten style blanket around my shoulders- how cool am I?
Rock n roll!

Oh Daisy, its horrible in earlt pregnancy when you feel so tired, I remember the tiredness as being overwhelming.

EARLY pregnancy, obviously

HI OH- didn't see you there- am fine, just up by myself.

That pretty much voices how I feel. Although my family are all pretty blunt and we tend to say what we think.

Noticed a few people have been missing from the thread lately and hope they are ok.

LOL @ super-hunky-dory-recovering -alki-with -the scary light -shining-from -her eyes!

I'm going to a 70th birthday party tomorrow, it's for the matriarch of a whole bloody AA recovery dynasty in Glasgow. MAybe I'll meet some of them! Hahaha.

It's only my second organised 'do' for someone in AA, and do you know what? I know I'll feel much more comfortable this time. Last one was my pal's 40th birthday and I'd just stopped drinking. I couldn't get it into my head that everyone in the room was sober AND up dancing as soon as the music was on, and they all looked pretty happy and comfortable with themselves.

There was no 45 minute lull you get in normal parties while people muster their Dutch courage! May be I'll even get up to dance this time .

ps, that's a belly button birthday, not a sobriety birthday!

I was at a meeting the other night and chatting to this woman. After a while I sort of wondered briefly how we had met- you know like when you meet people from work, or that you recognise from somewhere.
I had completely forgotten that we were only in this room because we were both alcoholics (recovering, obviously). I do sometimes wonder about wet brain!

What is that, OH, do you know- wet brain I mean.

I don't think I've ever danced sober, unless it was with the children, or by myself like a woman possessed, in the house.

Yes, 70 years sober would be some feat!

I went for a pub lunch with my colleagues today and ordered a coffee. Didn't want to trigger anything.

My daughter cringes and begs me to stop if I dance anywhere within her eyeshot.

I used to think I looked really cool when I danced, but some years ago I was in this club with a mirror and caught myself . Never was the same after that.

I'm off to bed, or i'll be a wreck tomorrow.
Night ladies x

just wanna say thanks to teasle and OH for your support on the other thread. it means so much.

thankyou x x

Be kind to yourself too PO, and pop back in when you feel like it. I'll look out for any developments, and you guys are in my thoughts.

it just all hurts so much.

it just really feckin' hurts.

sod the antabuse for now, my dd is what's important.
gonna ring the gp first thing monday morning and get an appt.
i'm trying to be kind to myself. i totally understand where she's coming from, really i do.

i took her to the pub earlier so we could chat over a few drinks (coke for her) she's told me a few things that i never knew...and this has been going on even before the drink took hold. i just never saw it.

g'night for now and thankyou again x x

Purpleone- you may hate me for this, BUT

You can't be there for your daughter if you're pissed, and you know that. You are a caring mum, and I'm not having a go, but you say its your daughter thats important- and you are dead right. xx

Hi PurpleOne, this wee bit of your message struck me:

"sod the antabuse for now, my dd is what's important".

I really think it would be important if you made a huge effort together to stop your respective self-abusive behaviour. If you're carrying on doing something that you said upsets her, then it's not going to stabilise her really. What do you think?

I know it's difficult to cope without this crutch but if your DD can see how much effort you're putting into your sobriety, maybe she'll garner strength from you. You guys have a fab relationship and I think you can really make this work.

Drink will do nothing except take more from both you and your DDs. Think carefully again about how you can make the Antabuse work for you PO, and perhaps look into Al-anon meetings for DD. Even take her along to that AA meeting if it's an open one?

Much love to your kids, PO. The best way to be kind to yourself is to give away the drink. It's robbing you all of your happiness.