5 onion rings, 4 cauliflowers, 3 french beans, 2 turnip tops and a parsnip in a pear tree - 10 / 10 club

[FrannyandZooey]

For anyone who wants a boost to their general health. The suggested goals are:

EAT 10 PORTIONS OF FRUIT AND VEGETABLES EVERY DAY - if you don't usually eat much fruit and veg I would build up gradually or you could upset your digestion.

DO (AT LEAST) 10 MINUTES OF EXERCISE EVERY DAY - can be yoga, stretching or something more energetic. The plan is that the idea of doing 10 minutes is not too daunting, and having started you may well find you want to do more.

There are no restrictions on what you eat so long as you get your 10 fruit and veg as well. The focus is not on weight loss but on improving our energy levels and hopefully our general mood and well-being. Sign up below and post here to tell us how you're getting on and how you are feeling.

Basic guidance on what constitutes a portion of fruit and veg here and you can download more detailed information by following the link at the very bottom of the page

mince pie one too.

sorry you are poorly boco - hope you pick up soon. toy cat made me smile - my dd was a cloud. When I was little I was trapped in a continuous cycle of being a shepherd so this is better I guess.

Okay - dd back at school so I MUST WORK!

hi just dropping in to say hi

I have not been around as I feel so awful. I thought I was getting better but then I went downhill again.

I am so miserable at the moment I am bringing everyone down but just wanted you to know I am still alive

not doing too well with the veg however as I feel so ill

Sorry things have been so bad Froth

Oh dear Frothy I'm so sorry you're feeling so bad, what a shame after you seemed to be having some better days. I hope you're getting some rest and that things will start to get better again very soon. x

Glad it's not just me Avi

Sorry you're feeling low frothy

oh i do the hearing me speak and wishing i stopped all the time

I've eaten 2 coxs apples and some pickled onions. that is not very good is it.

Am having - er, sprouts and bacon for supper. IS that weird?

think it wud be ok with bechamel sauce

oh yes - very clever. Extra satsuma in your stocking.

(makes note)

Hello

Flying visit - DH broke our internet access last night but I seem to have mended it

Just off out for a curry...think it better be a veg one

Actually indian is quite good for 10/10 points I think if you choose the right things. Just ten zillion calories

DS went to his nursery party and ate the usual crap no doubt...he has just come home and eaten four satsumas in a row and has started on the grapes.

I am slightly worried about this from a stomach POV.

o ffs i am so cross i have bought a load of jaffa oranges instead of jaffa satsumas am i turning into a man...i hate peeling oranges and faffinf around i thought i was going to have a lazy time with satsumasas whaaaaah

You're very coquettish in that get up Zippi, even with the jaffa rage.

i don't think i can do xmas names i was glenncloseascruelladeville or something last year and she seemed a grumpy bitch

i am feeling half coquetish as marilyn monroe and half sad and miserable so perhaps its aprporaitrew

appropriatew

of course the man would be juicyjaffa but i'm banned from posting with that name

Oh its you, Zippi, I wondered who santa was. Big oranges are a pain in comparison, but squirty and juicy still, no?

i shall try and peel it..then another 14 to folow or something

can you juice them?

dont u have to peel them then? do you have to have a mchine of some kind

i could wait 3 weeks until they implode with mould and then id be allowed to chuck them out an dbuy something else in the mean time its like bed blocking i cant get anything instead

You could film the decay and then speed it up for an art exhibition, I'm sure I've seen that in the Tate.

Hmm, maybe you do need a juicer to do it without peeling, or sit there with one of those ashtray-like ones with a sticking up bit. Might take a while though.

pmsl MrsC - think I have seen similar in Tate Modern too

I don't do oranges either.

Eddie puts it perfectly

(apologies for longish clip but I'ma crazed fan - feel free to ignore though the orange bit is sublime )

love him

oh i love oranges - love the work involve. You have to really care. Makes satsumas seem like sluts the way they slip out of their clothes with the slight press of a thumb.

Oranges - much more refined.

no wonder i prefer satsumas then and how much more exotic they soiund