Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support Thread II?

[kokeshi]

Welcome to the thread, the purpose of this is to give anyone, who is having any trouble with their drinking, to come and post about it honestly and without judgement.

There are many of us that use the thread for support and encouragement: some in recovery, others just needing a place to share about their worries. It's been going on in one form of another for a while now and has helped many people.

Everybody's welcome, no matter what stage your drinking is at.

Jump right in, the water's fine

Oh sorry to hear that DN isn't well either. Poor mum if she's not well herself and she's got 2 kids (1 just a baby) with D&V.

Gosh this is a bit like the sober thread! So far things have been ok and vaguely under control (2 gins and tonics at home).

Tonight I heard that a very old friend, my grandmother's housekeeper, is really on her way out, aged 91.

I am very sad that I haven't been able to see her since we've been here, because I've been so ill.

She really is the last person alive who has links with me and my grandparents,and I guess I have been very lucky that she has been around for so long.

Anyway, I don't know if I will stay sober tonight. I'll keep you informed - it's quite possible that another glass of wine would be boring...

I have no wine in the house........

.......for the first time in six months.

I've also got the D&V bug that is doing the rounds, so I'm not really feeling like drinking anyway. I was sick this after noon after picking DS up from school, and am feeling pretty ropey.

Although it is a horrible way to do it, it might just be the natural break i need to kick the habit. DH will be home tomorrow evening and he will help me stay strong.

Sorry to hear about your proriasis BM. My MIL has it really badly on her scalp as well. I'll ask her what she uses.

I'm off for a cup of something hot and herbal, LOL, then off to bed with a hot water bottle.

I'll catch up over the weekend.

BM, I used to use Polytar shampoo, have you tried that? It's quite smelly but it did budge a lot of the thick plaquey bits that built up. [sorry squeamish folk]. I was also a bit wary of using the topical steroids, and in the worst timesa just thought "what's the point?" - There was more psoriasis than normal skin and I would have been going through ridiculous amounts. Actually at one point I had nurses coming round every day to put coal tar bandages on my extremities. God, I forgot about that!

I was prescribed Dovonex a few years ago when it was quite new, and I found it helped as well. I really haven't had a bad flare up since I stopped drinking, compared to what it was I suppose so I just tend to ignore it.

Actually, I don't think it's such a bad idea to go for a course of sunbeds, and I know GPs can sometimes prescribe phototherapy? Maybe worth a trip to see what he/she can do for you?

Here's a link from the Psoriasis Association with all the latest treatments. I hope you get some relief BM, I know how uncomfortable it is.

Hellobellosback, sorry to hear about your grandparents friend. How are you feeling in yourself? Are you still in a lot of pain?

Daisy, well done in having an alcohol free home tonight. I hope you have a good night's rest.

BM, you asked about the accents earlier. My accent would probably sounds quite broad to you, but I don't really use all the slang words or colloquialisms. I find when I speak to my parents I can slip into it but I like to think I speak "properly". Well, I taught English as a foreign language in Taiwan and don't think I could have gotten away with it. Although I remember being horrified one time when a wee 5 year old chinese kid said to his classmate "Sit doon and shut it!" Lololol. Obviously heard me muttering it under my breath!

Hello I wonder if I can join you. I am over on the "I need to stop drinking white wine" thread but am still drinking every night far too much and have been doing so, if I am honest for 10 years and more, bar being pregnant.

Kokeshi I just read the thread through and I cried when I read the part of your post that said that you think tha tpeople turn to alcohol because their parents dont teach them how to deal with their emotions. I love my parents dearly but I do think that they didnt really let me express myself, I felt like I had to bottle everything up, plus I had some issues in my childhood that I have still not told anyone about and I think part of my drinking is about blotting that memory out.

I am just so happy to have found other people who are in the same boat as me. I feel so alone not being able to talk to anyone aobut it. If I mention it to my friends they will just say, why cant you stop. And I dont know the answer to that.

hi chardonnaylover and welcome.

I'm like you in that respect. Can't really answer why I don't just stop, butI suppose I'm trying to find it and that's why I'm here.

I don't have a lot of advice as I'm in the same place as you at the moment it would seem, but this thread has been an inspiration to me recently.

Keep posting

Hi chardonnaylover, welcome to the thread, I'm glad you've found us. This thread has been running for a while now and lots of people have come on and posted about their childhoods and their own parent's problems.

Here is the previous thread, if you read my post that starts about the psych, and then the subsequent ones after that, there may be more stuff you can identify with.

Please don't feel too bad, everyone on the thread understands how difficult it is. You're safe on here to post about anything you want.

Look forward to reading.

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HI there soft stuff, of course you can!

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Is there a correlation between liver damage and severe skin itching??? I have rather bad oatches of ezcema on my legs and a infuriating itchy back at times. I thought it just looked like hives. Changed my washing powder et al adinfinitum...still itching.
It's just usually my back and neck mostly.

SoftStuff! I was just reading one of the old threads you were on last night and I was thinking about you. Great to have you back. What's been going on?

I think there is... Kokeshi is quite good at these questions. You could always Googlr it, but be careful you don't scare yourself to death like I do every time I look up some random symptom.

Could be linked to your drinking, but ecxema is also linked to other stuff too isn't it?
Sorry, am not much help, its time I scuttled off to bed soon anyway...

crossed posts, sorry!

Yeah, the liver has about 1,200 functions vital to your health. It's basically the main filter of the body, taking out all the crap and disposing of it safely. If it's not working properly all the shit remains in our bodies and slowly poisons us. That's what you're seeing with the jaundiced eyes and skin.

Also alcohol dehydrates and prevents the absorption of all those necessary vitamins that your skin needs to stay healthy. It's important to really rehydrate yourself when you're stopping drinking.

Basically though, alcohol affects every organ in your body, don't be mistaken that it's just the liver. It causes enlarged hearts, dementia, nerve deterioration, stomach ulcers, pancreatitis and can lead to psychosis.

That, by no means is an exhaustive list. And it happens sooner in women too.

[dismounts soap-box]

teasle! How're you doing?

I remember looking up stuff about how alcohol effects different organs in the body...with a large vodka beside me.
Hmm.
I used to try and read research , articles, anything about alcoholism- almost as if then that knowledge would help me stop drinking, passively, just by having been absorbed.
Doesn't though, it just doesn't work like that does it. Do you think that is part of the early realisation process K? I had to actually realise at some point that I couldn't just sit in my house and read literature, and magically control my drinking. Does this make sense to anyone?

Am fine thanks! Cross posted again!

How are you tonight Kokeshi?

It be easier if we were all sitting in the same room eh? I was taken round a ward of Korsakoff's patients - I think it was supposed to be a deterrent - but somehow I just couldn't (or wouldn't) see any similarities between us.

Isn't is just mind-boggling when you think of it?

I'm fine thanks teasle. I have a lot of things going on at the moment and I'm having to practice what I preach by being honest and talking about my feelings. I have to go against the grain as it's in my nature to sit and stew, rather than cause any upset, but sometimes it's just unavoidable. We live and learn!

I think I'll try to get an early night tonight (well for me anyway). Night all x

Morning everyone

Hi softstuff. I don't think we've met before - good to have you here Welcome to chardonnay too. Keep posting, won?t you.

Hellobello. I'm really sorry to hear about your grandparents housekeeper. Hoping for some good news for you soon to balance out all the bad of late.

Purple, is it definitely excema? Just what you said about patches and it looking like hives made me wonder if it?s psoriasis that you?re suffering from. There are different types of psoriasis but it?s usually the plaque type that appears on backs and legs. The affected skin looks like thin scales that pile on top of one another and if you slough them off (sorry for anyone thinking of eating soon) the skin underneath is a silvery pink. I also get the other type. Not sure what it?s called but it?s more common in sweaty areas. It looks like raw flesh and I get it under my boobs . Psoriasis is really common in drinkers.

Good luck for the weekend Daisy. DS has come down with a D&V bug now, after a really bad cold. Feel like I?m never going to get him back to school. Hope you?re all feeling better soon. It would be great if you could ask you MIL what she uses if she?s managing to keep her psoriasis under control.

Thanks for the Psoriasis Association link Kokeshi. I?ll have a nose round there in a minute. I did try Polytar years ago and it was pretty good, if not a bit drying on my actual hair. I can?t use it now because we?ve got really low water flow on our hot tap in the bath and I can?t rinse it out. I end up with an even dryer scalp. I?m sure that some of what I?m calling psoriasis is actually product build up from not being able to rinse properly. In the summer I don?t mind rinsing with luke warm water but in this weather the hot water isn?t exactly boiling anyway, so to mix with double the amount of cold is pretty unpleasant. Nothing we can do about it though as I understand it because the water comes from a combi-boiler. Not that I understand it at all really.

I think I will book myself a session of sunbeds. It used to work a treat when I was younger and it?s not like I?ve had a foreign holiday for years. A healthy glow for Christmas isn?t such a bad thing anyway I can?t see my GP going for phototherapy. Mind you, mine is nowhere near bad enough to warrant dressings or a nurse to do home visits. That sounds dreadful. I didn?t know it could get that bad.

That?s probably quite enough from me about my scummy skin Sorry to anyone that?s feeling a bit queasy after that.

Teasle, I used to do that researching thing as well. I think I was looking for some documentation that proved that I was different to everyone else and could drink as much as I wanted without anything scary happening to me. If anything, psychosis frightened me more than anything else, but not enough alone to make me want to stop.

I?m so tired today. DS had me up in the night complaining that his leg was hurting. He was really upset and trying not to cry. Usually I?d think he was just putting it on to get in my bed but he was so obviously upset but trying to hold back the tears. I keep going in to him to check but I don?t really want to wake him if he?s comfortable asleep.

Suppose I may as well get on with a bit of housework while it?s quiet anyway. Sorry for such a long and pointless post.

Hope everyone else is doing well and looking forward to the weekend.

Oh and happy St Andrew's Day for Kokeshi and Daisy, and any other Scots on here of course.

Hi BM- you must be going stir-crazy by now.
It does get wearing being stuck inside all the time when the young 'uns are ill. I hope you are managing ok, because I know I struggle when I don't get out, or talk to anyone.
Your post wasn't pointless, it was informative! Sounds very uncomfortable, the psoriasis.

Hi to everyone else- how is everyone? Keep posting.

I did it....an evening of no wine

basically because of this bloody D&V bug, but still....I did it.

I have been giving a lot of thought about how I'm going to get through the weekend. I was supposed to be going out to the pub tonight to meet a friend for a few drinks. The D&V bug is a good excuse though, as I'm not really in a place to talk about it to my RL friends, even though they are all fab and would be very supportive. (Mind you, one posts on here, but we don't tend to cross threads very often)

I had a bit of a chat with DH this morning and he says he's going to keep me strong.....I think he envisages me being locked in the garage . He said he'd do the weekly shop as well, or come with me to make sure I'm not sneaking anything in. Yesyerday I left my wallet at home when I did the school run to avoid the urge to go to the offy. I'll do the same again tonight, and only take 50p for DS as he usually gets a treat on a Friday, if he has a gold star for staying out of trouble.

Sorry, I'm just rambling on here.

I'd forgotten it was St Andrew's Day....I wonder where I can get some haggis for tea?

I am getting really pissed off teasle. My flat is a mess and I'm exhausted. Ds has wet the bed every bloody night this week as well, but WON'T go back in nappies. If it wasn't for this thread I'd be so lonely.

How are you today?