Is anyone out there a heavy drinker/active alcoholic/recovering alcoholic?

[BrassicMonkey]

Ok, so I've name changed and it's taken balls to post this.

I think I might be an alcoholic or at least drifting into that domain.

I know my posting style is pretty easy to spot, at least by those that I chat to on MSN, but I don't want to be outed on here and I don't want to chat about it on MSN either.

OK, so now I've said that (quite bluntly possibly, sorry )...

I'm finding it increasingly more difficult to stay off the booze. It was bad enough last year, but I started this year with plans, and they've all been pissed away. I'm drunk/hungover more often than not. I'm suffering, the DC are suffering.

I want to stop. I don't like the idea of getting help but I'll do it if I have to.

Last time I had a drink was saturday. I'd promised myself that I'd have at least a 2 week break - tonight, I'm back on it again.

I want to have a go at stopping on my own before I go to AA or to my GP. Do I cut down gradually or just stop?

I'm probably going to be away for about an hour but any replies will be appreciated.

I come from a family of alcoholics and what scares me the most is that I'll never be able to have a sociable drink again without taking it to ridiculous levels. I'm scared of what's happening to my life and to my health but I'm more scared of being a miserable old cow that can't relax because I can't have a drink.

As I said, any responses would perk me up tonight.

TIA

Just popping in quickly to say thank you for your kind words, I appreciate it.

Hope you are doing ok Brassic {smile]

Fantastic work, BM, really is.

I don't know specfics about whats safe either, but if your clinic said by half I am sure they are right: its their job to know. And you still have the option of asking GP for help if starts to feel too rough, I'd think?

I can totally understand you feeling pissed off with feeling so rough. If you start getting angry with yourself though, try to turn that anger towards getting well - use it to make plans, clean something, go for a walk, anything other than beat yourself up. You're a valuable, precious person, working damn hard to get well: its not your fault you have this problem, it IS your responsibility to sort it, but its not your fault. Repeat after me

Thank you Toady. I've been thinking of you today. Lots of love to you and your niece. xx

I am really in awe at how far you have come in such a short time Brassic. Honestly.

BM, re bruising...I don't really remember all the info I once knew, but I do believe excessive alcohol consumption can do bad things to some of your body's vitamin reserves, and affect clotting. I DO remember people in treatment with me being told to take lots of Vitamin B something - 12? Or 6?

Can anyone help out with this one? Kokeshi?

(ps Kokeshi, am posting to you on your thread )

Nice words Elibean - thank you

Thanks again Franny. You've been an inspiration along with all the other recovered alcoholics/drinkers that have posted.

I could be imagining this but I think I've heard that bruising is a sign of the liver struggling to cleanse the blood. If that's rubbish I'm sorry. It could have been the kidneys, or any other organ actually . It's playing on my mind though.

hi BM

BM - if you are worried about liver function then there is a herbal remedy called 'Milk thistle' which is very effective at improving liver function. You can buy it in tablet form from a health shop.

It is possible that you are upsetting the salt content of your blood which could lead to the cramps. A good multivitimin with magnesium and potasium in it should help. Bananas are good too for potassium.

I think someone posted earlier on the thread about vit b supplements being important too.

OK: just checked. Alcohol does slow down the clotting of blood generally - so if you bash yourself against something (which I certainly did all the time when drinking) you are going to bruise more easily.

Yes, advanced liver damage also affects blood clotting, but thats much less likely - and not going to happen suddenly, either. Far more likely to be you bumping yourself and your body not healing fast due to alcohol.

And I checked the vitamin too. Try and go to the chemist tomorrow, and get yourself a good Vitamin B complex, or some Vitamin B6. As part of being nice to yourself and telling your body you're going to get it well

Thanks for that Dogs.

It's possible that I heard something years ago about heavy drinkers suffering with cramp and bruising and have associated alcoholics with damaged livers, and therefore I've misinterpreted it all. It will be a good thing if that's the case because it shows that my body has suffered due to the alcohol but (touch wood) it's nothing that won't right itself once I'm off the booze.

The bruises are really ugly. I was so drunk once that I sat on the toilet with the seat up and got myself wedged down it. It really did hurt but the bruising was ridiculous and although it was months ago they are still there. 2 cricket ball size brown (faded now) marks on each thigh where I hit the toilet so hard.

On my list Elibean - thank you.

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

I take it you're worried about liver cirrhosis?
I don't whether you'd be in this stage of liver damage yet to be honest.

The best way to find out is to go to the doctor and ask for a Liver Function test (LFT). This measures liver enzymes and reveals the state of the patient's liver. The one that indicates acohol toxicity is called Gamma glutamyl transpeptidase (GGT). Mine was though the roof (something like 10 times normal levels) at my worst point.

I was actually admitted to hospital when I was at uni (can't believe I forgot about that!) because I had turned a weird shade of yellow (skin, eyes, all over). I was really bloated and was throwing up constantly.

They even did a liver biopsy (you really don't wanna know!) which showed that I had alcoholic hepatitis caused by alcohol damage (not the viral kind). Alcoholic hepatitis interferes with the production of proteins that help your blood clot and with the absorption of vitamin K, which plays a role in synthesizing these proteins. As a result, you may bruise and bleed more easily than normal. Changes start within the liver as inflammation (hepatitis) and progress to fatty liver and cirrhosis. Cirrhosis is the final phase of alcoholic liver disease.

But, Since I stopped drinking, I've had no furthre problems, all symptoms cleared up and my liver is functioning perfectly. I was really lucky, I didn't heed the warnings I was given because I was deep in the throes of it. It took me another 6 years of misery (and a dose of acute pancreatitis) to finally surrender.

I'm not telling you this to scare you by the way, I think that the best thing is to go to your GP and see for yourself. The liver can regenerate, but once it reached cirrhosis, there's no way back.

Hi Losty. Hope you're ok

I'm off to bed now.

Oops, took ages to post that! Sorry for repeats. Milk thistle is great, as well as making sure you get all the B vitamins.

I so wishs I ahdnbt read k's last psot. Far too close to hme. I am evne sadder now. (

losty, that is only my experince, and there was a happy ending! I'm fine now.

I've been in hospitals all over the world as a result of my alcohol abuse. Bill Bryson with a difference

thats great Kokeshsi, I am so glad. Unfoutynately dh is not so lucky. I knew this was alll a bit too rarw for mee to cope with, btu I wnated to be heere to support BM as she has given up mssn. Sory.

Sorry, Kokeshi, I posted to Losty before I'd refreshed and seen your post. That sounded really rude.

I think that's actually amazing that you were at that stage and your liver is functioning normally again. I'm relieved to hear it too.

I'd rather go to my doctor once I'm dry so I can explain what I've done and that I'm now in control, rather than him want to keep an eye on me too.

Thanks for the information. I know I shouldn't take your experience as confirmation that my liver is fine because as you said, you were very lucky, but I do think it's unlikely that my liver would be damaged after a relatively short time of abusing it. I am paranoid at the moment as well and I have always suffered with cramp, possibly because I have very little salt in my diet, and maybe I have hit myself harder than I remember.

How did it go today? Is the world a lot noisier?

Oh Losty, I'm really sorry. This conversation is insenstive and I just didn't think.

dont be sislly BM - you dont need to woryr aout me. I am just a bit piossed tonught and I'm felelign sensitive becuas of rdcent events. But I have tot earn to lvie with all this dotn I. You reaaly dont need to worry. ITs me who need to sya soryr for deprssing the thread. I will go away again now. But I was msissing you thsats all.

losty
x

Kosheki - I think there are a few people on your 'switch on' thread who'd like to know how it went

Sorry for hijacking!