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Original poster

*^*^*^*^COPING WITH CANCER --- <<< SUPPORT THREAD >>> ^*^*^*^*^*

220 replies

KittyLetteMeEatAnEasterEgg · 26/03/2007 20:39

Hi,

i thought it might be a good idea to start one of these as its something that affects so many people and its just devestating. Hopefully we can support each other

This is a thread for anyone who is being affected by this awful disease, whether it is you, a family member or friend that is diagnosed feel free to come her and share how you feel, im sure as in true mumsnet spirit there will always be someone here to listen .

xxx kitty xxx

OP posts:
PollyLogos · 16/04/2007 15:44

Lalaa, really good to hear from you I often wonder how you are. Hope life is good! x

noddyholder · 16/04/2007 15:59

I had a vulval tumour removed in 2001 after being told by my gp 8 yrs earlier that it was a cyst which due to my other health problems he suggested I leave it alone as I shouldn't put myself through more surgery for cosmetic reasons.Following my kidney transpalnt on 2000 I was having a full health once over and a doctor saw this lump looked at it puzzled and said she would remove it.I knew then I think that it was something else but when they called me back and they told us it was advanced and malignant dp and I fell apart.But I saw a brilliant oncologist who removed as much as possible without leaving me disfigured and I had a partial reconstruction which is brilliant!Whilst recovering they told me the smear they dod at the same time was CIN and they had done a cone biopsy and hoped they had got it all!It really is the scariest thing ever to happen to me but more people are living with cancer today than ever and for me it gave me a big wake up call to appreciate everything.I have my 6 monthly chesk up this wednesday and I live in fear that it has come back but am optimistic about treatment.I hope you all get the support you need here The C word is so shrouded infear and it doesn't always have to be a sad ending xx

Waswondering · 18/04/2007 14:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

geekgrrl · 18/04/2007 14:40

waswondering, sorry to hear that's it's not good news. best of luck to your fil.

re. appearance, I saw my mum over Easter and she looked the same as always really apart from her hair obviously. She has a wig and whilst the style is quite similar to what her hair was like it still looked completely different to me IYKWIM and I found that quite disturbing at first. Dd1 (she's 7) also noticed it and said that it didn't look at all like her real hair. My other children also seemed a little apprehensive at first, they obviously noticed a difference but couldn't quite work out what it was.
Other than that she looked fine. Her eyebrows and lashes had thinned out a lot but were still there, although she told me last night on the phone that they're pretty much gone now too, a week after her 4th round of chemo.

spudmasher · 19/04/2007 12:16

Waswondering, I hope you have a great time while they visit.The weather will be wonderful. It will be a good one.
We recently saw my dad who is undergoing chemo and has lost a lot of his hair. My children 5, and 8, looked at him for a while and announced that he looked like one of the orangutans we had been watching on the tv. There were gales of laughter and play acting from dad and all was well after that.
He looks the same other than that really. He has put on weight because of the steroids and just looks like an old loved motheaten teddy bear.
Thinking of you.

figroll · 19/04/2007 14:39

Sally strawberry

My FIL had a renal carcinoma and had his kidney removed. This was when he was 69.

I am pleased to report that he was 90 a few weeks ago. He talks utter gibberish most of the time - but he is definitely alive and kicking!

Waswondering · 19/04/2007 18:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

spudmasher · 19/04/2007 20:46

Waswondering, if it is any comfort at all my dad has a scan on tuesday to see if the first lot of chemo has had any effect. It is worse not knowing than knowing. We are all pessimists when it comes to a situation where we do not know the outcome and the word cancer is involved because we need to prepare ourselves. It is perfectly understandable.
What I find difficult is verbalising this, but my goodness it makes me feel better when I do. What I really want to say in my situation, which is similar to yours ,is- the cancer has spread horribly and he will die in the next few months. And if I am honest, that is what I am preparing myself for.
Any news better than that will be a bonus.

I am establishing my baseline of awfulness and working up from that.

I have just read back through what I have written and considered deleting it all but I am not going to because it is what I feel.

I am sorry if it sounds negative.

dandasmummy · 19/04/2007 21:09

Lalaa, so glad you're getting through this. sending you respect and a hug. x
Kitty, any news about your mum? x
Love and hugs to everyone else x

onlytheone · 21/04/2007 00:05

Not posted on this thread before but totally understand what everyone is going through. DH diagnosed 8 months ago. DD just 3. It is like being on a roller coaster and not knowing when things will dip up or down again (or vice versa). Waiting for scan results are just awful. We are living or lives by the month at the moment. For us this is an improvement on a few months ago and although there has been ar recurrence of the tumour, DH is looking and feeling well. I guess, I just want to say it has helped us to appreciate the days that are good when we can all eat together, go somewhere together and make small plans for the following day. In terms of changing appearance during various stages of cancer treatment, our DD just asked where all DH's hair had gone and we told her DH had left it at the hairdresser's! (He had a cropped style as it began to fall out to minimise the mess!). She initally looked concerned until we brushed it off and the weight loss is only commented on when DD sees photos pre illness and just comments that "Daddy was not poorly then". We have found that being open, honest and matter of fact have worked in accepting the physical changes. Sorry to have barged in on this thread but feel for you all and hope my comments are useful.

onlytheone · 21/04/2007 00:09

Not posted on this thread before but totally understand what everyone is going through. DH diagnosed 8 months ago. DD just 3. It is like being on a roller coaster and not knowing when things will dip up or down again (or vice versa). Waiting for scan results are just awful. We are living or lives by the month at the moment. For us this is an improvement on a few months ago and although there has been ar recurrence of the tumour, DH is looking and feeling well. I guess, I just want to say it has helped us to appreciate the days that are good when we can all eat together, go somewhere together and make small plans for the following day. In terms of changing appearance during various stages of cancer treatment, our DD just asked where all DH's hair had gone and we told her DH had left it at the hairdresser's! (He had a cropped style as it began to fall out to minimise the mess!). She initally looked concerned until we brushed it off and the weight loss is only commented on when DD sees photos pre illness and just comments that "Daddy was not poorly then". We have found that being open, honest and matter of fact have worked in accepting the physical changes. Sorry to have barged in on this thread but feel for you all and hope my comments are useful.

runkid · 28/04/2007 18:02

my thoughts are with all of all i can empathise and i sympathise with you all. it is a roller coaster of emotions and cancer is so unpredictable.

spudmasher · 01/05/2007 20:58

Well we are at the top of the roller coaster today! Dad had the results of his scan and the tumours have shrunk in size. He goes in for the tird lot of chemo tomorrow knowing that it is prolonging his life

So he went out and bought himself a brand new volvo.......

onlytheone · 01/05/2007 21:23

That's fantastic Spudmasher!! It is so good to hear that he is motiviated to treat himself. That should cheer you all up too.
Lovely news!

spudmasher · 01/05/2007 21:26

Thanks theonlyone!
Hope things are going ok for you at the moment.

thedogsbollox · 02/05/2007 22:52

Great news SM!

Pass on my good wishes to him (and your lovely mum too)

Speak soonxx

kittylette · 29/05/2007 13:35

Hi

My mum had a follow up appointment today and the cancer has grown back,

they have to cut it out agin (but theyre going to cut a much bigger area around it out - a plastic surgeon is doing it)

feel a bit dumb struck - domnt think its hit again yet.

Thats about it really

Id put all this to the back of my mind and hoped it had ended.

kittylette · 29/05/2007 13:41

anyone about?

i havent tol my dp cause hes at work and i cant ring him

kittylette · 29/05/2007 13:51

forget it

kittylette · 29/05/2007 13:57

amazes me how a thread asking about shephards pie gets 4 replies in a few minutes yet I'm still sat here crying feeling like theres noone in the world to listen to me,

ironically i am having shephards pie for tea

kittylette · 29/05/2007 14:00

12 replies to the cottage pie, it is a popualr dinner isnt it,

i feel sick

lulumama · 29/05/2007 14:02

sorry to hear that kitty

i trust that your mum will make a swift and complete recovery

re support threads....i think sometimes they are seen as closed book, and if you urgently need support , maybe a new thread ? x

lucyellensmum · 29/05/2007 14:03

kitty, i am sorry for you, your mum and your family, nothing else to say but its shit to feel abandoned at a time like this. hope you find a way through the day to give dp a hug when he comes home.

robinpud · 29/05/2007 14:05

So sorry to hear that things aren't going too well for you and your mum kitty. I haven't read the whole thread, but know it's skin cancer . I hope the doctor could answer as many of your questions as possible, but I guess neither of you were expecting such an outcome?

mummylin2495 · 29/05/2007 14:14

kitty ,im sorry i havent read all your posts but just wanted to say keep your chin up and hope for positive news in the future.