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EATING DISORDER SUFFERERS.......

174 replies

lissielou · 08/03/2007 13:52

thought id start this thread coz there seem to be a few of us on here. ive been anorexic since i was little, started my first diet aged 6 and have struggled ever since. still have tumbles but getting a bit of control back now.

anyone else?

OP posts:
hillary · 08/03/2007 23:22

Hmmm I'm guessing the diabetes has made her put on weight and the CF is effecting her badly too, I'ts alot clearer now, how long has she had an eating disorder (that you know of) does she snap at you, does she pannic when you approach her about it?

How much does she weigh - has she lost alot of weight for her size?

Sorry for all the questions - just trying to establish a profile.

ChopinRocks · 08/03/2007 23:26

I have suspected she started the bullimia around october 2005, she has lost alot of weight but she was no bigger than a size 10 THEN. Shes a size 6 now. she looks awful. She is snappy, tearful and the cf requires a lot of medication so if this doesnt get absorbed properley at meal times alot more problems occur plus the diabetes medication/sugar levels all goes haywire.

ChopinRocks · 08/03/2007 23:31

have got to go to bed but will be back tomorrow as i am interested in your views on this. Thanks.

hillary · 08/03/2007 23:34

If shes not been practicing it for long then she has a good chance of turning it around, the longer she does it the harder it becomes. I would recommend she went into a residential clinic but she needs to be willing and accepting she has an eating disorder and wants help. If she doesn't accept it and want to get better she won't and theres no point her going in. Yes they will make her eat and watch her & she will put on weight and look healthier but it will be short lived and as soon as she leaves she will be back to square one.

I have just come out of a clinic and am in outpatients at the moment (I go back daily and have weighings) but I know I have a problem and I do want to get above it.

It sounds like the eating disorder is the tip of the ice burg for her, Its either her illness which she is finding hard to deal with or something else, you need to find the root cause and tackle it there.

Has she any friends with the same condition as herself she could talk to?

ChopinRocks · 08/03/2007 23:37

no friends with same problems but i completely think its connected to depression from her illness and one other thing.

it sounds like you are determined to turn your own life around which i can only imagine must be challenging but well done.

i will be back on tomorrow.

hillary · 08/03/2007 23:44

I think she would really benefit from meeting people with the same illness as herself, making friends and being able to talk about her illness with them especially when she feels down.

Her bulimia is a coping method, she needs to find an inner happines with who she is or she won't be free from it.

Night Night

hillary · 10/03/2007 19:37

Ah great.... now I have the dreaded sickness bug! Puts my recovery right out the window

hellobello · 11/03/2007 13:12

Hello all. Can I join you too? Hello Hilary! how are you getting on since you left hospital? That was a little while ago I remember. I saw the size 0 things on telly. Oh dear. I think I'll just get fat and happy! I had horrible eating problems for about 15 years, but I've spent the past 13 years free of any ed. I was finally treated for depression and the eating problem melted away. I still drink too much and am inclined to beat myself up with anything I can, but I eat normally. I used to want to disappear totally. It wasn't about being thin, it was about existing at all. There's nothing new about skinny celebs. I'm gobsmacked that they've only just twigged that people are starting to notice.

hillary · 11/03/2007 19:05

Hi there Hellobello, nice to hear from you well done for your recovery, you sound like you have worked hard at it, I think you always have that self disapproval but you sound alot happier

I'm going back to the clinic daily now, have gained a little weight - now 6.7 stone but its going down hill this week as we have all got the dreaded sick bug not really the best thing for someone who's trying to eat & not puke, you do it without trying

Crazy I know I'm going to end up loosing weight & may have to go back into the clinic when its over

Its like an omen something's always keeping me from getting better, its not fair!

Littlefish · 11/03/2007 19:29

Hello there. My mum became anorexic when she was about 30 (I was 6ish) and has spent the last 34 years in a cycle of anorexia, bulimia, binge eating or depression. I have spent my life trying to understand her, and therefore myself.

I overeat and binge eat.

I hope you don't mind, but I might lurk from time to time.

hillary · 11/03/2007 19:31

Hi Littlefish

Welcome to our thread, you can linger here anytime you like

Sorry to hear about your mum and yourself, seems to be a fair few of us around. It does help though when you can talk to others who feel the same

Littlefish · 11/03/2007 19:32

Thanks Hillary

hillary · 11/03/2007 19:33

You're welcome

CountTo10 · 11/03/2007 21:37

eating disorders can start from just about anything and too many people think it is purely about wanting to specifically be tiny for fashion purposes etc. My ed came on from a period of change in my life. My mum and step dad had split up and divorced, my mum was at uni and then at work so hardly around. I'd been told I couldn't dance anymore and was being pushed to make decisions re uni etc. I felt alone and isolated and totally out of control of my own life. My ed felt a way of getting that control back. It also felt very satisfying to feel the weight coming off, like i was achieving something. We didn't have scales so it was all measurements and I'd set myself weekly targets. There was also an element of attention in it I think. I do believe that it ties into how you feel. I know that when I'm stressed out or feeling down, I either binge or withold.

I do still struggle now though. for example I've just given up smoking which should be a good thing. But all I keep thinking is that I'm going to put weight on and I hate the idea of that so instead of thinking about doing a small amt of exercise or eating healthily, I think well I just won't eat breakfast. It didn't bother me when I was pg though. i think cause at the moment I am a bit down about a few things and my self image is not that great so I just have to try and keep sensible. It is nice to talk to other people who can understand though as I don't have anyone like that around me.

hellobello · 11/03/2007 22:13

Fashion is just a toy. Bodies aren't a toy. Eating disorders go way beyond fashion. Who, in their right mind wants a body that doesn't work? Eds eat your brain, shrivel it: an ed will make your bones crumble and rot your teeth. It will mess up your head and it will kill. 1/5 of people diagnosed with anorexia will die of their illness. Is it worth it? Sorry, it makes me very angry.

hillary · 11/03/2007 22:57

My bodies not a toy

recoveringmum · 11/03/2007 23:06

anyways when i was extremely thing due to my doing bulimia all i did was wear layers so it wouldnt be noticeable.

littlefish - when did you find out your mum had a problem? i have a feeling my mum was also bulimic when she was younger but she would never tell me. it would make me mad if i knew she did, becuase then i wouldnt understand why she didnt try to help me

redbracelet · 11/03/2007 23:07

i don't understand your post hellobello

ED's mean different things to different people. Its not all about fashion.

I can sense a lot of anger in your post though, why is that?

Nbg · 11/03/2007 23:14

hellobello, ED's are a form of mental illness. I'm quite sure the majority of ED sufferers are aware of what it can do to them.
Sadly it isnt as easy as reading about what it can do to you and being cured.

I was anorexic when I was alot younger through a phobia of eating. I came out of it the other end.

steinermum · 11/03/2007 23:52

I binge/dieted from age 17 to 36 and in the earlier years of my ED was utterly obsessed with food, to the point where it ruined my year abroad, my time at university and my first couple of jobs. I had psychiatric outpatient treatment and two years of psychotherapy. Eventually I think that having children and realising what my body was actually FOR was what pulled me out of it. Now I'm slim, happy and completely fine with food - I NEVER thought I'd be able to say that when my ED was at its worst.

hillary · 11/03/2007 23:58

Hi all,

Looks like theres quite a few recoveries I thoght I was above it, don't think I'l ever be above it. At least my dd's have great godparents if the worst was to happen.

recoveringmum · 12/03/2007 00:13

i was bulimic for 12 years and it completely debilitated me. i lost my friends, i lost jobs, i lost some hair, i didnt graduate from my college, i spent half my time depressed from what i was doing, and the other half doing it. my life was food. (and by the way hellobello although the first time i did it i was thinking of how thin it may make me, my need for being thin had nothing to do with fashion or how others would see me, it was more about me trying to make myself feel something).

i thought getting pregnant and having kids would change me, but i was throwing up right through my second pregnancy. i would spend time with my wonderful dd1 and then start bingeing, and then just put her infront of the tv so she would be distracted as i ate and ate.

in the meanitme, my life seemed perfect. in love with my dh, dd1 and dd2 incredible babies, a job i love and dreamt of my whole life (and i managed to get it without my college degree), parents who fly in to help me with the kids once a month, and so on and so on, and the whole time, me, continuing to binge and throw up and ruin all the wonderful things being thrown my way.

after years of trying every kind of treatment, with absolutely not a day of success, with scars on my right hand from my teeth, i decided to try a last resort - NLP.

after my first session i didnt do any bigneing or purging for 10 days. 7 sessions later (about 5 months, since i gave birth in between and didnt go for a few months) i dont remember what its like to want to wolf down cakes and cookies and creamy things. i eat normally like a clock. when i feel i've eaten enough i put down my utensils (this being something i never thought i would be able to achieve. i had previously tried to get all sorts of clinical tests done to prove i had a mental physical inability to determine when i was full).

an ed starts for a certain reason. (or any number of many different reasons). but soon after it starts, we program ourselves to use this behaviour to deal. to deal with what bothers us a lot, to deal with what bothers us a little, to deal with bad things, then also with mildly bad things, then also with things in general, and eventually this become the only way we know how to behave. all you need to do to change that is 'rewire' the way you think so that any emotion we have does not lead us down the ed road any more. just need to erase that path from your brain.

and it works. and whats more, i am actually thinner now then during my ed, when i was just puffy and my weight would fluctuate. that happens when you eat normally on a daily basis.

if any of you are looking for something to try that will help you, in a minimal amount of time, change how you think and behave, please try nlp.

Nbg · 12/03/2007 08:47

Hilary, you can be above it. I know it might not feel like it atm and maybe hasnt for a long time but you can get through it.
You just need to find a way that will help you.

hellobello · 12/03/2007 11:21

I'm sorry about my rant. Eating disorders are horrible. I was referring to the size 0 progs on the telly, which I think trivialise the situation. I too lost a great many years to eating problems and found my only solace in food. For me, it was to do with existing at all. I longed to disappear and exist in the air only. It upsets me a lot that every mag is full of really skinny people and full of diets that don't work.

Nbg · 12/03/2007 11:55

HB, you are right to be upset. It annoys me too to see all these people in magazines being so thin and I bet they are very unwell.
It is interesting that today Britany Spears has admitted that she has been Bulemic for many years now but has never done anything about it.