Obese but with pretty normal legs / arms etc but very fat, enormous belly ***Ovarian cancer diagnosis - title edited by MNHQ at OP's request***

[TwitterQueen1]

Hi
I'd be glad of any advice or personal experiences here. I am around 4 stone overweight, so definitely obese. Most of it is on my stomach though, which now looks like I'm 11 months pregnant with triplets. I'm in my 50s so this is not a possibility. It's very painful and I am short of breath when I walk etc.

I've put on a lot of weight in a short period - 10lbs in 2 months.

Six months ago I was bodyboarding in the sea, walking every day and doing an exercise class every week. Now it's a struggle to do anything.

I'm having bloods done on Friday but any ideas / comments? Am I just unlucky to pile it all on in one place?

I've only just seen this thread. I hope the forthcoming treatment goes well. I'm so glad you have spoken out about this.

I don't do crying really. Maybe once or twice a year. But most people seem to find it cathartic so I think I'm just a weirdo! Hopefully it is helping you, which is all that really matters. Cry or scream or swear or eat lots of chocolate or whatever you need to do to get through the day

The looking well comments are frustrating when you don't feel it. Though I quite like them as I delusionally feel that I can't be that ill if I look alright

Have you had any counselling? I found that very helpful after dsgnosed as I had things I wanted to talk about that I couldn't say to my family.

Do you want to talk about your fears? I've had some dark thoughts at times so I do understand. Well, that's probably annoying because we are all different. But I sort of understand. And I'm always happy to talk if it would help at all :)

Thanks for the kind words everyone. I'm feeling stronger today.

Flyright
I did go into the garden for a while and even did a tiny bit of weeding. I can feel it in my legs today!

Barchester I’m back on the cashews again , attempting to focus on protein rather than lots of sugary carbs. Sending good vibes your way.

Gonegrey56 I spoke to my doctor about support groups but there aren’t any in the town where I live – only for breast cancer. She referred me to Sue Ryder and a lady came round to talk to me but she is a palliative care support so I told her I wasn’t at that stage.

Curtains people mean well, I know.

Pennina and Donajimena Thank you. I’m hoping greater awareness will mean earlier diagnosis for others.

Leslie You’re no weirdo . Thanks for the offer. I don’t feel I’m quite ready for counselling yet. I need to hold it together for the exam season and part of me is worried that if I let go I’ll just fall to pieces. So I’m soldiering on with the ‘fuck you cancer’ attitude.

Pleased you are feeling stronger. Fuck you cancer is absolutely it.

Fuck you cancer indeed. Hope the exams go well for your girls. It's stressful enough without the bastarding cancer. Do you have something nice to do together when they're done?

Impressed with the weeding. Better than me. But am making a tortilla today for a friend and young DS coming for lunch. The cat is already girding his loins.

Glad you're feeling stronger. It's going to be up and down, we should all seek out pleasures when and where we can , however small

Twitter good idea to just grin and bear it through exam season. I thought I might fall apart too. Actually I had one session with my counsellor where I wailed about how my death would affect my family. That was my cry of the year then I seemed to have got it out of my system and just got on with life. I have the occasional wibble, but mostly I think I've accepted it all. But you don't know if you'd feel that way or if it would open a huge can of worms at an already difficult time! Maybe something to consider later on if you are still struggling and think it might help.

I hope you're alright today. Fuck cancer indeed

Just wanted to check back in and say hi. No words of wisdom, but just to say I completely get it. We're bloody amazing most of the time, but sometimes a bit of cry, a bit of a shout and a bit of a wobble is completely natural and completely necessary. Big hugs. Btw - if you do want to talk/ask me anything about my op, please do x

Started round #3 yesterday, so felt very fuzzy afterwards. Pretty good today too (so far), though tired. The steroids mess with my sleep so it was another 5am start today.

No Bevacizumab yesterday - it thins the blood apparently and since the plan is for an op at the end of this month / beginning July they didn't give it to me. CT scan on Monday - though I won't know what's happening until next consultant appt on 16th.

I hope everyone else is well. the sun is shining and I'm going for a slow walk in the sunshine in an hour or so. And thanks to some very lovely friends who came round yesterday and did a whole lot of gardening for me, in secret, I'm going to sit outside and admire all their hard work!

Hope you enjoyed your walk and "yeah" to friends who do lovely things like that

Sorry that the steroids are messing with your sleep . I was lucky there in that I'd be out for the count by 10pm on my steroid days .

Enjoy the rest of the 'good' day , hope the aches n pains arn't too bad when they kick in

Hey TQ.
Enjoy the sunshine x

The steroids are a pain. I hope you enjoyed your walk in the sunshine :) and your friends sound fab! What a thoughtful thing to do.

Did you get a PICC line in the end?

Good luck with your CT scan

What lovely friends! Hope you enjoyed the sun. Glad to hear that today was heading in the right direction. Much love. Pen

It's a lovely day for a short stroll. And how nice to have a tidy garden.

Hope all also going well on exam front. Nearly done?

Hi TQ, is it round 4 today? Just popping in to say I hope all goes well today. X

Sending good wishes TQ

Hello everyone
It's been a shit week. Had the CT scan on Monday - 1st vein blew. 2nd one was OK, except they shoved the dye in so quickly that blew too, and it all went into my arm - again. Painful. So 3rd cannula required.

Had a complete meltdown on Wed in chemo as it took another 3 attempts to get a cannula in. I know, I know, I know I need to get a PICC line but the thought of having it in me and the bits sticking out of my arm for months and months just freaks me out. I can't even wear pierced earrings - I used to faint everytime I tried to put them in. It didn't hurt at all it was just the thought of it. I sobbed all over those poor nurses in the chemo ward . At least with a cannula - when they get it in - it comes out after a few hours.

I am seriously considering hypnosis. the weekly chemo regime is turning out to be pretty brutal. I'm only holding back from the PICC because I'm hoping I will be able to have the operation soon and don't know if it would be useful to have it in now or wait until afterwards as they might put their own in....

Nails have started to go weird, with black lines. I know this is normal - anything I should do about it?

Exams have only just started Fly. 1st one went well though she's dreading Russian history tomorrow.

Could they put the line in when you're under anaesthetic?

Hi Twitter

Nice to hear from you.

Thats a real pain about the cannulas. I have a hand like a bruised pin cushion this week from chemo, but other sessions they have got it first time.

I totally get why you are avoiding the picc line, since I started the hot water trick they have not offered one again though as it has until this time worked fine.

Ideas might be worth a try -

I stand at the sink in the room for 10 mins first with my hands under the hot warm tap and this makes me an easier target mostly. I am also somewhat specific with which hand they use when I can get away with it as I am sure one is easier than the other (right hand in my case, wonder if its cos I'm right handed).

I never look at the needle going in, but as soon as I feel it I give the inside of my mouth a good bite or pinch my stomach brutally until it's done and this seems to help somehow. I did ask about the numbing gel they use for kids but they were not biting with that idea.

Keeping well hydrated from the day before hand.

Oh I also take paracetamol twenty mins before the time slot.

Hypnosis might be worth a try as you say.

xxx

That sounds like helpful advice. I'm afraid I have nothing constructive to offer except sympathy.

Good luck with the history. All about the questions with those exams. Making your answer fit what was asked. She'll be fine. Best of luck.

Sorry about the further cannula issues. As your veins get worse then they will be more likely to blow however slowly they infuse things etc. I really would urge you to get the PICC asap. I'm not at all squeamish so easy for me to say, but surely it can't be any worse than all the failed cannulas?

I'd get it before the op if you can. They may not be able to use it for anaesthetic - my nurse told me there's some drugs they can't use them for but she couldn't remember what they were! But they could certainly use it for all the other bits, including pain relief. Anaesthetists are quite good at getting cannulas in but even they sometimes struggle, and it's really frustrating when you need pain relief or antisickness and the cannula has failed and nobody is able to get a new one in. It took the anaesthetist several attempts to get one in for my last op. I must've had about ten during my stay - some lasted less than an hour. In the end they wheeled me down to the chemo unit to get my port accessed instead (few nurses can use ports) but obviously if I'd had a PICC line in they could've just used that anyway.

That's all a bit rambly sorry I'm half asleep

I think some others on Tax have reduced nail damage by using dark nail polish. Something to do with UV reaction, I think.

I hope you're feeling a bit better today when will you get CT results?

Thanks Leslie. I've just rung the onc nurse and she said wait until we get the results of the scan - which will be next Friday. She said they have PICC appointments free every day so if I do take the plunge it can be done quickly. But best to wait until I know whether or not I'm going into hospital.

Thinking of you today TQ, I hope you have a better day than last Wednesday .

Also from me

Thanks for the kind thoughts Barchester & Hairy

Would you believe I was sitting in hospital this am with the warming beanbag on my hands when the chemo nurse told me I wasn't on the list and there was no chemo for me.

Someone forgot to tell me not to turn up because apparently the Medical Team have decided I might be able to have the op, so I shouldn't have the chemo. You'd think my onc nurse might have thought to ring me .

So I have to go to the Churchill to see the surgeon on Monday. They will then do a laparoscopy (camera through a keyhole incision near the belly button) before confirming whether we can ahead with the hysterectomy. They only do the laparoscopy if the tumour has reduced by at least 25%, so it's good news from that perspective.

It's a good thing I didn't have the PICC line as it looks like I've got a couple of weeks off chemo - yay!

Brilliant news TQ (apart from the lack of communication). V good news about Monday.