Tamoxigang New Year, New Thread, *46*

[BetsyBoop]

Hands round a for everyone.

[MomOfTwoGirls2]

Hi all, any recommendation of pain killers to cope with Taxol aching bones? Mostly legs, ankles and feet. Worst problem is at night and trying to get to sleep. Onc gave me Ponstan 250, doesn't seem to have any impact.
I took Lorazepam to sleep again, but I've only 4 left, And would prefer to keep these for worst days of next 2 cycles...

[smee]

Mom, I used to take Co-codamol to help me. I had some left over from spinal problems/ surgery, so didn't bother asking anyone but it really, really helped! Hope you can fix it soon. Miserable to have those aches.

Hope kitkat's okay. Bet she's glad the day's finally arrived.

Goodness, school situation sounds just what you don't need. Hope it's sorted soon.

Wren, your poor Nephew. Hope he gets through it all okay.

Waving to Malt, Betsy, foofoo and all others I've missed. Hope everyone's okay out there.

[Wren48]

Mom, so sorry to hear your aches are so bad. Is a paracetamol/ ibuprofen combination any good or just not strong enough?

[BetsyBoop]

mom - I had ended up with tramadol extended release + ibruprofen which worked okay for me. Sorry you have the bone pains, my first cycle on tax was horrid too, much more doable if you can sort the pain. Also I found heated wheat bags helped to ease the aches, I used to go to bed with four of them!

Hopefully really is all but done now, I hope they have been lovely to you this time.

waves to kitkat again, hope you are first on the list.

well 11 rads done, only 4 more to go, wahooo!
I also feel like the peripheral neuropathy in my hands and feet has finally turned a corner. Not totally gone yet, but much better than it was and not painful any more (3+ months after last chemo and counting...)

[reallyreallyworried]

Brief message as on my phone! All done so u may all have yr hands back now! Hope i didn't squeeze too tight! Xx

[BetsyBoop]

well done really :) I hope it wasn't too bad?

[malteserzz]

Well done really, that's another one done :) hope they looked after you this time

[weebarra]

You'll be glad that one's over with Really. Hope it went as well as it can!

[reallyreallyworried]

Hi all

So it was an uneventful although emotional session today! Began with me crying all the way there on the bus! Thankfully it was a quiet bus. I was praying for a huge traffic jam, but no such luck. I actually got there early.

So had half an hour to pluck up the courage to go up to the unit. 9.50 I have a call from my BCN checking I am there. A nice reassuring chat to say she promised it would be okay, and she was at the end of the phone IF I needed her!

So receptionist showed me in, just seeing the room again, brought on more tears! But it was controllable. Mouse kept me in check! Then nurse came over. The lovely nurse I had on my first Chemo She flushed the PICC line and changed the dressing while we waited for the chemo to come up! Due to stupid last nurse my skin was red raw in places and bleeding. Big ouch when she cleaned it! But she was as gentle as she could be and she talked me through it.

Hooked up to Chemo all going well, then unit manager came over to ask how I was, and to say if I needed anything or I was worried I only had to ask for her. You know when you are just in one of those moods and you can't cope with someone being super nice, I cried! So for the next 20mins I'm in the middle of the Chemo unit in tears, and not really sure why!

Finally pull myself together and my BCN turns up, bless her. She always manages to make me smile. She asked if she could pull up a stool and she just sat and held my hand and told me she was very proud of me for facing my fears. Then she could see I was getting emotional so she changed the subject and told me we would talk about feelings in private another time.

Before I knew it Chemo was done, and I was allowed to go no more hospital appts, hopefully, until next Friday! But not going to think about that until at least Thursday night.

I need to try and get back on track this week with some real smiles. A more relaxed week, doing some fun things for me! Well that's the plan.

I want to say Thank you to all of you. I wouldn't of got through this week without you. I definitely wouldn't of gone today without all your words of support. So really I am very grateful to ALL of you. You are an amazing bunch of ladies. Xxxxxxxxxxxx

[BetsyBoop]

That sounds much better really, even though I'm sure it was tough emotionally. Well done you.
You have now officially had 2/3 of your chemo, sounds much better than a 1/2 doesn't it. :)
Hang in there. You will probably feel okay for a couple of days, as tax seems to hit folks from day 3 onwards. So enjoy your weekend, safe in the knowledge that you were amazing today. :)

[Marshy]

Two weeks at work done. Just sitting here with coffee and a ton of toast. I think I may be comfort eating, though not sure why.

So nice to see your update really I was thinking about you.

Hope kitkat is alright. No doubt she's in a drug induced haze at the moment!

Hope you're feeling a bit more comfortable mom and yay for Betsy ploughing through.

Hope everyone else is having a good day. May go to the cinema tonight to see the new Leo di caprio film. Must try to resist the chocolate display before I go in.....

[Wren48]

Congratulations for having got through today, really. It sounds as though they gave you the right support and you got yourself there and through it. Hooray for doing some fun things for you this week.

I now have two very expensive dressings on my slow-to-heal breast. One is sprinkled fish collagen ("just like parmesan", the nurse said) and the other is a vacuum pump dressing with a battery pack that flashes green and whirrs intermittently. Hopeless for sleep, but let's hope it does the trick in time for chemo. This is a very strange life I find myself catapulted into...

[Marshy]

wren that all sounds very high tech and intriguing. Fingers crossed it does the trick. Did I miss your update re your surgery? Are you getting along ok?

Apologies for all the hoping in my last post :)

[malteserzz]

Really I'm glad it all went ok and your BCN sounds lovely, I'm jealous ! Hope you're resting now

Marshy let us know what the film is like if you go I fancy that too

Wren hope it all does the trick !

Off out for a meal with dh tonight, can't wait for the day I can go out without this sodding wig am so sick of the style I used to curl my hair etc to go out. He has suggested getting a new one but I'm hoping not to have to wear it for too long now, grow hair grow !

Hope everyone has a nice evening

[Wren48]

marshy, I'm mostly fine after my surgery, but still a bit worn out. Recovery seems to be slow from this one. My new breast has the potential to be lovely (feels very natural, will match nicely) but has a big wound where there was the scar from the previous lumpectomy - that bit of skin has just given up. I've been trying to be philosophical about healing speeds, but of course I'm a bit anxious for it all to get a move on. Which is why I'm glad of any help, be it fish or battery powered.

[BetsyBoop]

wren - you need to chat to gigs and/or HND (she has not posted for a while, family stuff going on atm) - they are our resident experts on wounds that are being tricky devils, using pumps etc.

malt - I know what you mean about hurry up hair - didn't bother me not having hair during chemo or even after surgery, but now I'm nearly done I want my hair back! Enjoy your meal out. :)

marshy - glad your return to work is going well.

kitkat - hope you are comfortable and are now the proud owner of two pert, matching boobs

[Lilymaid]

Mom I'm getting the bone ache in my legs too - but this is from my hormone pill. I take ibuprofen but sometimes find it helpful to get up at night and walk about - and cooling my legs seems to help. I will discuss this with my Oncologist as I've seen fish oil being suggested - but as he is prescribing calcium + Vitamin D tablets for me I don't want to overdose on Vit D.
Betsy my peripheral neuropathy is improving slowly. Little fingers now OK!
Malt I am also in a hurry to get my hair back but then have the big decision - whether or no to go au naturel which is probably going to be "salt and pepper" colour.

[harrietv]

Hello ladies - got space for another? I've been lurking on posts where you've posted in the past when people were awaiting results from biopsies. Today I got mine and here I am. There's a lot of uncertainty and waiting with this isnt' there. I think i need to get used to it. But so far the news I have is that Dr thinks it's Stage 1 although biopsy hasn't shown invasive cells it looks highly suspicious for invasive-ness (?) from scan so have had another biopsy today to hopefully tell us more. It's 2cm.

So another week till I find out if we do know more. My lymph nodes 'look' ok on US but will have sentinal node biopsy when I have my lumpectomy.

Have booked in for lumpectomy in 2 weeks but have till next week to decide if I want mx instead and reconstruction at that time. All a bit of a head spin really....not particularly attached to my boobs and will do anything to buy myself extra certainty of time with my DSs but Dr says it's overkill but my choice.

might be offered genetic testing after we know more about type of cancer (they don't know if it's any of those things i can't remember...hormone receptive etc), as i'm only 38.

have been tearful but have periods of calm. main concern is keeping DSs from worry. Have just had another surgery (thryoidectomy) unrelated and not cancer, and they handled well so feel i just want to keep the C word from them if i can. They're 4 and 7. Do you think it's fair enough to be lumpy mummy needs another lump removed (was lump on my thyroid too, though a cyst). I don't really want to tell anybody actually. is that weird? i have told family and 3 close friends but don't want life to suddenly stop and everyone to look at me with pity.

all advice and hand holding welcome!! sorry for missive....good to get it out! x

[Wren48]

Welcome, harriet and hugs to you for having to be here. The waiting on results is a great strain and exhausting, and there are big decisions that have to be made in a short space of time...

It's great that they can do the surgery in two weeks; nice quick work. The lumpectomy is much lesser surgery of course, but I had a lumpectomy and then had to go ahead with the mx anyhow (but I was unlucky).

Everyone here will understand about your DSs. It sounds like lumpy mummy is a good way to go as that will be familiar to them.

[GoodnessKnows]

Hello Harriet
I'm another Lumpy Mummy awaiting confirmation/ clarification of what my Lumpy actually IS, trying to keep my DCs (also young: 3 and 6) from hearing the C word and trying not to mention 'tumour' for fear of 'pity looks'.
I am having exactly the same thoughts and concerns, so it must be pretty normal.

[GoodnessKnows]

Oh, and welcome to the loveliest group you never wanted to be in ;)

[GoodnessKnows]

Had my pre-op today. Met the head nurse (I think) and Physio. They'd been told that I was anxious and needed to relax me a bit as was better for my recovery. Moi, nervous?

It was a two hour chat. There was skirting around The C Word. I was shocked at what I was told about the recovery process. It's more major than I'd thought. Can't go into it as have put it in my mental loft, double locked, bolted n thrown the key away. Too scary n upsetting. Things like... I'll have to build up to sitting and to standing. I'll have an opened wound and will only be able to lay on my side (best chance of healing). Not stand. Not sit. For weeks. Doing a poo will be a major deal for me (sorry!). You know, stuff like that. I'll have tubes, lots of them, including drainage ones coming from the open wound (sacrum/ lower back) for blood.
They'll not know whether it's malignant, gd forbid, for about a week post op (I'm getting used to the agony of waiting but really... even after the long-awaited/dreaded op!). Life's not looking rosy in my garden from this side of the fence. Can't wait til spring. Don't want DH to go away (tomorrow).
Physio woman was good but was SCARY. She'll ate no crap/ wimping out. I can just tell.
I told them I've told my tureen I'll be off for twi or three weeks. They politely restrained their smiles/ guffaws. That's when they spelt it out in greater detail.
Feeling (emotionally) like a punctured balloon tonight. And that's BEFORE the op.!

[GoodnessKnows]

Fat blummin' fingers!

[Wren48]

Oh boy, Goodness, it sounds as though you've been through the mill today. The loft has got to be a good place for this sort of stuff. Really really warm ((((hugs)))) to you. I'm not surprised you want DH around.

Mind you, a tough physio is just what you want; they're a lifeline back to normal activity.

[Gigondas]

Hugs goodness- the pre op is pretty scary but it is much better to have it this way then have it played down and get a nasty shock afterwards. I had that happen on one procedure and wouldn't wish it on anyone. Hope you are having good cuddle with dh tonight before he goes. It doesn't seem like it but you will get through this.

Really-well done on getting thru today. I don't blame you for crying. Have a nice restful weekend.

Waves to everyone else . Feeling very drained and flat.