**TAMOXIFEN 29**

[MaryAnnSingleton]

crikey !

ooh yay!! Great news OTM!!!!

Excellent news OTM - so pleased for you, - it must be a relief, - good luck with todays cannulation

ned - choir sounds great, - something very joyful about singing with other people, - hope you have lots of fun. new car sounds good too.

Sometimes - you needed those skirts, - and deserve them after your weight loss

Keep an eye on that temp MAS, hope the throat gets better soon. James is my favourite, I didn't like Brendan to start with, but I have warmed to him now - he has a sweet partner and a lovely dog, - I liked his Disney bird house Actually I like all the semi finalists this year - which is nice, I don't mind who wins.

Sparkle - I'm also a big Gareth Fan - DD and I always watch his programmes - DH not allowed in the room

Glad you slept a bit better Gig, - when will they release you, have they said yet? What you watching on iplayer?

I went to yoga this morning - which was lovely and relaxing, - I almost didn't go because I woke up at six a.m. with cramp in my calf - and afterwards it felt as if it was going to go into another cramp any minute. But I ate banana for breakfast (which I'm sure I read somewhere is supposed to be good for cramp), and went. - Glad I did because it was lovely.

I'm waiting for a woman to ring me back about driving lessons, so hopefully will get something arranged this week.

Yay for OTM. That's fantastic. Does that mean the chemo's blitzed the hell out of it? Am guessing it does. Hooray for you

MAS, sore throat sounds ouch. Nice soothing sweets might help?

Gig, hope those doctors leave you alone long enough to snooze. When do you get home? Is it all on track?

Choir sounds fab, Ned. Must be good to meet new people too.

Have just taken DS to a specialised optometrist. Was amazing as she found coloured overlays make a massive difference to both speed and accuracy as he reads. Fascinating to see it all.

How interesting, smee! Who knew??? (Apart from her, obviously)

hooray for otm -brilliant news !!!!!!
smee that's v interesting about optometrist- will ds have specs then ? (he will look ultra cute in them)

OK, so I've bought one! The most important detail is that it is red. . .

smee coloured overlays are excellent - is definitely on my teachery nonsense suggestion list. Did DS get to try different coloured ones? Different colours work for different kids, there's no hard and fast rule - I had 3 or 4 kids on different colours on the go in my class last year. I've only come across them in the last few years, so I don't think they are widely used, but the results can be pretty startling! Hope DS pleased with the improvement?

OTM YAY for good scan results - well done my love! Definitely light at the end of the tunnel now.

sparkle I am completely with you on the Gareth love - he is fabulous! I want him to come and do a choir in Dorset so I can worship work with him. I sang for several years in 2 choirs conducted by the judge who came to the Royal Mail - Ralph Allwood - he is similarly inspiring and fabulous!

MAS hope you are taking it easy and resting?

kurri banana is good for cramps because it contains potassium, I think. Glad you went to yoga. I did a Pilates class this week with a friend - going again next week.

sometimes good work on the skirts. You definitely deserve them

Hope everyone else OK this chilly day? Lots of love to you all x x x x

Racy red, Ned - how fabulous. When can you have it?

Yay for otm scan results and of course for a new sparkly red car ned.

Chemo always left me with a sore throat mas and only once did it materalise into tonsillitis. Keep a close eye on your temp as it can change very quickly.

Just popping on quickly as I have been out since 9.30 am this morning and just popped home before school pick-up and DDs dance class. This cold is totally wiping me out and I now seem to have lost my voice (DH is probably cheering). Am finding the running back and forward for rads quite tiring. Can't believe how busy the place is, usually standing room only.

Hopefully will pop on later but thinking of you all.

Poor Gracie.

Rads are absolutely knackering, so take it easy when you can. to offer cheer....

oh,those kind of overlays !! honestly,am very slow.
yay for new car ned - how exciting !!

Poor gracie - rads are tiring,all that coming and going.Take care and try to rest.
Am feeling a bit unsettled-tummy and throat and feeling a bit low again- trying to get hold of bcn too. I think today I kind of realised the implications of this new stage - I can't quite believe I've hopped to stage 4.

It must be really hard to get to grips with, I know.

I hope the BCN can offer some practical help. And don't forget, stages and statistics only mean a certain amount xxx

MAS sweetheart, - it must be so hard, and you are bound to have low days, but Sometimes is right, there is a huge amount of DX's covered by the term stage 4, - and you are an individual, statistics are a very very inexact science.

Did you take steroids for the first few days of your chemo? - because they will also very much affect your mood, I was always very tearful and a bit snappy for about five days after I'd finished my steroids.

Hope you can have good chat with your BCN, it really does help xxxx

yay for otm scan results.
mas, I can't quite believe it either, but as kk says you are an individual andnot a statistic (hugs).
On bus home and have lady singing gospel. Must be the time of year!

MAS, the chemo alone's bound to knock you, let alone getting your head round it all. BCN is a really good idea. Do you think maybe some sort of counselling might help. Somewhere to take it all to? xx

Gracie, no wonder you're tired, a cold on top of Rads is tough. Rest up. Make them wait on you. You need a bell to ring for service.

Ned, yay for red shiny car. How fab. Interesting you use overlays too. I'd never heard of it before, but DS's teacher told me it was worth a try. The Optometrist played around with lots, then settled on the colour that worked best. She then got him to read a paragraph of random words and timed him for a minute. With the overlay he read 98% of the words and made only 2 mistakes. Without the overlay he read only 73% and made loads of mistakes, including missing out two whole lines. Really was amazing to see the difference. He's going to give overlays a go for a while, then might have tinted glasses. He's very into the idea as he reckons they'll look cool.

No steroids, just the chemo - probably feel a bit miserable because am not feeling well. Am trying to do a picture which should concentrate my mind a bit. And new book job is happening - 300 drawings ! (small ones !)

Specs are cool - they'll suit junior Smee's inventor personality !

for otm results.

mas chemo plus taking on board your new normal is a lot (I had a wait between chemo and dx so some time to get head round it). First cycle esp is tough as you are establishing how you react (I also got sore throat from time to time). But you do find that there is a pattern so will seem more manageable and familiar next
Time (today I feel really sick and tired which is yuck but I know that this is normal for day 3 which helps). And I massively second smee suggestions of counselling as that has really helped give me some headspace to sort out my feelings and voice what I can't always talk about easily. It hasn't been a waste as I have slowly found I can tackle and deal with most of this in time.

smee the glasses sound great and that is a huge difference from the overlay.

gracie do we need to duct tape you love? As others have said , rads is tiring so take it easy.

ned red car - my favourite colour.

topsy are you still locked in a curry making hell?

Waves at ned kurri sparkle amber and anyone else lurking.

Hugs to mas, you didn't really have much time to get around the diagnosis before you were hit with chemo. I remember my bcn saying that whilst it was good to get things moving sometimes it doesn't really give us time to get used to it.

gigs hope you get released soon and fingers crossed for no chatty nurse tonight.

Off to bed soon to try and clear this cold. See you all tomorrow.

I've now done a week of radiotherapy and its going okay.

I had a review yesterday when they asked about side effects etc. I don't seem to be getting much, apart from localised redness. I visited another school on Tuesday evening and felt very tired yesterday. I'm wondering whether, although i'm not feeling tired as such. my recovery time is reduced.

I didn't realise how easy and quick radiotherapy is. It takes longer to park and get changed then the actual process itself. All the staff are friendly so its quite a pleasant experience. ITs not often I get to lay down alone, with no disturbances, phone calls, housework to do etc. I know I am fortunate that the hospital is only 10 mnutes drive away, so it makes the whole process easier.

OTM - glad your results are good
New car sounds good.
Hope choir singing went well. My boys have strict instructions that if gorgeous Gareth visits their school, then to sign up to whatever he is doing.
Hi to everyone.

OTM, hurrah!!

MAS, hugs from me 'n' all. And for everyone else too.

thanks to everyone! we are very happy in or house although dh seems to think this result is purely down to him!! trying to remain level headed thoug as of course it is only 2 months in and anything could yet happen, but i am very please

mas i am sorry you are low - i get very miserable too - being floored by my own new normal of daytime tv, bed and mashed potato. but when i can remember to take it a day at a time i can sometimes feel happy by little things like a good chat with dd, or a really short walk with the dog (talking 100 yards here, not miles) and the love I feel from mates/family.

hugs to mas and everyone else

Well that's the first time I've heard rads described as pleasant , but whatever floats your boat, Invicta! It is mercifully quick, I know. I actually hated it because it made me feel very low, and also I had a very bad back and it was almost impossible to lie still in the position they required. I am glad you are managing to look at it positively - and it does mean you have the end in sight. Hope the skin continues to behave.

Gracie, I hope the cold is getting better, and Gig, I hope madame chattty stays away.

Smee - coloured glasses would be very cool indeed - especially if round and inventorish.

I found effect of rads was cumulative so although having treatment was ok, the tiredness and eventually the skin rash did catch up with me. However I did feel better after a couple of weeks.

How is the cold gracie?

No mr chatty last night so had good nights sleep (after rather bizarrely watching some bio pic about kenny Everett) and feel a load better (less sicky) than I did. So hopefully (drum roll and ) as I had my last chemo , my line can go today and I get to go home this morning.

Big gig however is more keen on seeing some booty my sister has given me (but really for big gig)- its some playmobil stuff including a playmobil peacock. When I asked her if wanted to see me or the playmobil peacock, she said both (but did say the peacock first). At least I know where I am in the pecking order...

Glad to hear it's going so well Invicta. I'm with you on rads, as I didn't mind them either. I think it was the relief to have got that far. Also after chemo it felt so much easier. All hugely helped by a Carluccios with almond croissants, right next to the hospital.

OTM are you still smiling.

MAS, hope you're feeling a bit less wobbly today. How's the throat? Is it any better? Great news about your book though. Is that one of the same series you've done before?

Gig, any sign of escape? I think it's usually about now that they hurl obstacles in your way.

Sometimes I read that as DS needing to be round rather than the spectacles.

Waving to all. Mahoosive deadlines to hit, so coffee essential. Hands to all who need one.

We watched the Kenny Everett thing too! I thought it was fab - very moving.

I really, really hope the line goes today and you can go home. And that you can face lots of to celebrate. x

here, we are dog sitting again. so I am off to vacuum up some of the sweater's worth of hair that seems to drop off her every day. The poor animal is on a restricted diet which she hates, and she is refusing to eat this morning because she thought she was getting the roast chicken leftovers I was putting into dd's sandwiches. When she saw the bowl of muck dd actually gave her, as per instructions, she got all offended and stomped off in a huff.

Cross post, smee! Hope the work goes well.....

MAS - it is definitely fab news about he book. You'll do a great job, I know. Is this the jokes one?

If I were you, I'd consider having a few days away with just dh and T over half term. Just to get a breathing space and time to think in a nice setting. I know going away isn't always easy for you, but think about it. Maybe go somewhere not too far, that you've never been before, so it comes without expectations, and that you never have to visit again, when you are feeling more settled. Then you can leave all the crap there, and move on. Maybe that sounds a bit woo - sorry.