**Tamoxifen** 27

[Gigondas]

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I'm glad the colposcopy is over Smee, hope it wasn't too grim, and well done for having an perfect cervix - Is it something you feel you can shout about to the world in general ? - I would

Gig - oh dear to patronising GP, yes to the head tilt - I have had that too.

Overthemill - you are bound to feel jittery about your first chemo - it's a leap into the unknown, and also brings the reality of it all home a bit. I hope you can relax a bit over the weekend, and then once you get started on it you will have an idea of how it will affect you, then you can plan which days you'll feel best on and save yourself some treats and fun things to do on them. And as Smee says all of us on here have our bad days, nothing off limits on here - if you need a rant or a cry this is the place. xx

How are your kids coping in general with your illness? - mine were a little older when I was DX, but it's always hard telling them about the illness and treatment, although often they cope better than we imagine they will.

Just seen your shopping on your s and b thread Overthemill - you have bought some lovely things - those trousers look gorgeous and that longline tee did you get the purply/plum colour? - it's lovely) I feel a trip to Gap coming on

thanks all - i think i will get the plum colour as its so cheerful tho torn betwen that and the practical goes with everything white! will order tmrw now.

my dcs are each managing differently: 16 yo boy cleaned out entire kitchen day after we told them, 19 yo girl held my bowl when i vomited first day all day long (which is huge for her, very squeamish girl) and 13 yo keeps asking how i am and alternately stating how unfair it is for her! she has had a rough time with school and her own chronic illness and one of my juggling acts is keeping up with all my apts and her! but she has come back from holiday with relatives with a lovely chemo kit ll made/put together by her including handmade cushion cover, hot water bottle and cover and all kinds of thoughtful goodies (she was with auntie who has also battled recently having chemo just last year). I feel dreadful we had to cancel our family holiday and they have each been making their own arrangements. poor dh is using his annual leave up on hospital apts as hospital is an hour away and that makes 2 from where he works. i feel big guilt all round.

It sounds as if they are all dealing with it in their own way Over, - and how lovely of your DD to put a chemo kit together for you. Although it's tough for kids, I honestly feel as if mine have emerged as stronger people from the experience, - I would never have wished to put them through it, - but you might as well take any positives you can from the whole business!

Don't feel guilty, - your family want you well again, - there will be plenty of opportunity for holidays and trips once you are. Hospital round trip sounds a long one though, - is your chemo the in-patient kind like Gig's , or do you go in for a few hours on one day to have it?

Just popping back after a day out at Minsmere - lovely - am so happy that T is still so interested in wildlife - in fact he's been adorable all week ( new girls- T is a teen !) home tomorrow but it's been lovely - dealt with anxiety pretty well too and no chest pain either !
Smee - glad to hear that cervix is perfect and shiny

Hooray for MAS's (still wonderful) teen. Glad you're having such a lovely time.

Over, pointless of me to say don't feel guilty, but DON'T FEEL GUILTY. They love you and are there for you, it's part of life. Bugger to have it as part of yours, but they do sound lovely your lot.

Friday night, so will soon be poured. We're having a take away to celebrate my perfect cervix.

Wonder how Sometimes is getting on at DD's show...

am home - it was such a lovely holiday,really fab. However, a letter waiting for me from GP saying chest x ray has shown shadows which need investigating,so am referred to chest clinic.

Oh mas that was a bit of a shock. It is probably nothing as lots of lung stuff is to do with infection etc

I suppose so, but I'm feeling very well - will go and see if I can speak to her on Monday

Good plan- you don't want this hanging over you any longer than have to

thanks gig

MAS, oh my that's a horrid letter to return to. I'd bet it's infection or something too, but still horrible to have to wait until Monday. for you. xx

Oh MAS - not what you want to greet you when you get home from holiday, - but as Gig says, I'm sure it is nothing to worry about, - you get shadows from infection, good idea to see your GP on Monday though so she can reassure you.

I'm glad you had a nice holiday, and lots of lovely walks.

I've been trying to garden today - in between thunder storms! I've washed the glass of my greenhouse, and washed the car, done some weeding, and DH and I put up a stone trough/bath type thing that mum gave me from her garden - so tomorrow I'll get some nice things to plant it up with.

I came second in the olympic name competition and I have won a lovely tote bag - so thank you all for voting, - you are stars

Gig - do you get home tomorrow?

Oh mas glad you had a good holiday it did look fab but sorry you had to come back to that. However, it's probably an infection as smee says.

DS1 back from camp and had a ball. Huge bag of very wet clothes back and I doubt there has been any much sleep. Good to have him home though. They bivvied out last night which was a good experience for him although he said it did start to rain.

Syringe driver down today so waiting for the inevitable slump.

Waves to everyone -been slouching all day watching Olympics. I hate sport but absolutely loving the Olympics. Oh spoke to onc yesterday who said clot was classed as a mechanical clot and wouldn't affect me getting Tamoxifen, huge relief.

Good news about the clot gracie (actually that doesn't sound quite right - but you know what I mean )

Wow kurri an industrious day! Yes home tomorrow but feeling done in as too much hospital and low blood iron (about to have a transfusion) contributing . My lovely sis brought me pie and chips as couldnt face hospital food or another pre pack sandwich or ready meal. I desperately want

I know a few people who have had false ralarms on chest scans mas so try not to worry.
Right back to battling the nurses about unnecessary prodding

Hope sofa day has helped and glad clot doesn't interfere with tamoxifen gracie

Aw gigs hope you feel better after your transfusion. My FIL has needed quite a few recently and he always feels better afterwards. I'm sure you will be delighted to get home.

kurri I know what you mean. Glad you had a good and industrious day in the garden.

Looks like I have managed to talk DH around to redecorating the house. The decorator is booked for September, just need to choose colours. We are getting DD bedroom, hall, stairs and landing and then 'chemo' room when my chemo finishes.

Gig, really hope transfusion has pepped you up a bit. Am willing you home tomorrow. xx

Gracie, a mechanical clot sounds rather funny, but if you have to have one, I'm glad it's that one.

Kurri, hooray you won something. Has the large tote bag got anything in it??

Ned, are you out there?? Been thinking of you and wondering how your are. Hope wounds are starting to heal.

Off to cook. Have no idea why it's got so late. Asparagus risotto. Latest lot of Olympic lodgers out watching screens in parks, so just me and DH. Hope everyone's having a good night.

Evening lovely ladies

Loving the gold medals rolling in

Although not as much as I love sometimes and the amazing dressings she so kindly posted me. I think i may actually love her. . . The whole world has become a slightly better place today! Feeling bit less tired too, so bit more positive.

MAS letter must have been a shock. Most likely to be infection, I'm sure.

smee yay for perfect cervix! Hope you had nice takeaway.

gracie good news about clot - really pleased it won't affect the tamoxifen.

kurriots I'm exhausted just reading your list of today's jobs. Take it easy tomorrow, won't you?!

You're all fabulous - and I feel privileged to have so much support and love from eveeryone here x x x x x

Evening everyone.I hope you are all having a good weekend.
Up-date about my Aunt.She had fallen over afew weeks ago but didn't go to hospital at the time,because she was so stressed about the lump she had found.Well the MRI scan has shown she has broken her knee cap.I feel really sad that she suffered so much without telling any of us.She has got low calcium,so maybe that is why she broke her knee so easy.
She has got to go for another MRI scan,because the results were inconclusive.She will be in hospital until she starts chemo on the 20th at least.
So what can i do to help? There's my uncle and 3DC at home.So i thought i could cook some meals for them.Two of the DC are grown up,but they work full time and then go to the hospital each night,along with my uncle.
What could i do for my Aunt?
Any advice would be very welcome.

Hi Flying
Hospital supplies -
Loads of clean pjs (need more than you think)
If she has one of the bedside tvs , vouchers for them .
Decent food , hospital meals are hideous .
If I think of anything else I'll let you know .
In the mean time , I hope things go smoothly for her .

Ned glad you are feeling a bit better .
Amazing the affect just decent dressings can have eh ?

Smee at your perfect cervix !
I knew it !!!

Mas holiday sounds blissful !
We go on ours next week .

Gigs , Gracie sending you both special healing vibes . I've been a bit worried about you both , so stop worrying me !

Been out and about non stop since my sis , bil and nephew arrived .
Today was glorious , most sunshine I've seen for ages .
So we headed up to the Giants Causeway , was a fab day .
Home for Indian takeaway and lots of wine , and lots of GB Olympic gold medals !

Sorry not been around much , will be back tomorrow night or maybe Monday .

Love to you all xxx

Morning , lovely ladies, from a very sunny Surrey! Still reeling from our amazing performances in the Olympics yesterday!! What an amazing haul of medals! Felt so sorry for the two rowers who won silver, seeing how upset they were.

We went to Hyde Park to watch the women's triathlon, which was hugely exciting. We got really close to the athletes.

Perfect cervix - well done, smee .

All fine here. My blip seems to have blipped off and I am feeling back to my usual positive self. A useful reminder, though, that the low days are all part of the pattern. Thank you for your support, you gorgeous women.