Tamoxifen- the silver jubilee 25th edition

[Gigondas]

New thread in honour if queen mas

Funny you should say that as dh is keen to holiday in Ireland .

And yes kurri we will do something post treatment but I just am feeling bit sorry for myself. My sis is lovely as is my dad but he is quite hard work to spend a lot of time with.

I could drive up and whisk you out to lunch somewhere gig !
@ topsy's dh's failure with tools- poor love.
We had sun today- in fact we had lunch in the garden and stubbornly stayed out when it started to rain !

Sorry been missing a bit but have had hectic weekend. So sad about little Aillidh. Poor, poor little girl.

Looking forward to our 'date' tomorrow topsy. My appointment is 8 am but I think I have to report to Bridgewater first. Transfusion Services is in the tower block, can't remember what floor. There is a lot of tooing and froing going from one place to another and then there is a wait around before a final x-ray. We should be able to fit a couple of lattes and cream bun in.

gigs Ireland is lovely albeit a bit very wet but gorgeous places to visit. People are quite nice too

Happy belated birthday to little old lady dog. 15 wow. Furball will share his lamb bonio as he loves lady dogs.

Thai sounds yum smee hope it was lovely. We were out for dinner last night, belated anniversary meal, we went to an Italian it was very nice but absolutely bunged to the door so not much sitting around at the end.

Lunch went well today. First time I have ever catered for 10 in one sitting but it all went well and conversation flowed so panic over. I am never very confident at having people over. Homemade brownies and cheesecake for the fbs trolley.

Sorry I'm not being very supportive at the minute but I am thinking of everyone and to all those with painful necks, shingles, etc have a good night's sleep.

well done for the lunch gracie and good luck tomorrow ! have a nice time with topsy

Who's watching Wallender ?
Must admit to having a little soft spot for Mr Branagh .

DH is consoling himself (about the slight on his manhood having to call a plumber in ...) by eating his own body weight in crisps and Danish pastries .
I have chocolate trifle .

Gracie will text you when I have got to BCH , and you can tell me where you are .
If you don't , I shall just activate the tracer ...

Gig , not inviting DH , just you
Well , if he will go off and leave you ???

Good luck tomorrow to our NI girls, - enjoy your meet up, eat a couple of buns for me (you know you want to ), hope everything goes well at the hospital.

topsy - I can also see MAS in soaking clothes, water pouring off her hair saying 'it's just a few spots, it'll soon pass'

I was outvoted on Wallender - so will have to watch it online. I also like KB, - I always think my DS has a bit of a look of KB about him (probably wildly deluded).

gracie - oldladydog might steal the whole lamb bonio for herself, she's quite greedy She's also very haughty and rude when it comes to boy dogs, and likes to put them in their place. (My mother had a wire haired Dachshund - one of the big kind - and he used to follow OldLadyDog round walking about four foot behind her, occasionally stopping to forlornly hump thin air, imagining he had a doggy girlfriend. OldladyDog just looked at him with such contempt )

Gig - missing a holiday is a shame, so you're entitled to feel sorry for yourself - we'll have to think of something to keep you entertained while DH is away. < puts thinking cap on > xx

Old lady dog sounds very funny kurri. Furball is very easily put in his place. My boys walk him with a friend who has a female cockapoo. She is tiny but it is funny to watch as furball walks along beside her watching her every move and if anyone stops to stroke him she has a huff and sits and cries. They are like an old married couple except she has a tendancy to jump on his head. He is a big black labrador but as soft as butter.

We I shall have a bun for each of you tomorrow.

I watched Wallender, which I usually love, but couldn't really get into tonight's, maybe next week's will be better.

Off to bed now as it will be my first early start in weeks.

Morning All

Am in hossie with the lovely Gracie
Well I was for at least 4 minutes before she was whisked away

Am sure she will come back , at some point , maybe ........

What are you all up to today ?
Hopefully something a little more exciting than all the sitting around hospitals waiting for each department to be ready for me , that I plan to be doing today ?

If you have a little time , pop on over to style and beauty . There is a thread about converse and the op linked 2 pairs of converse .
I think I might be in love with pair A .
Tell me if I am Very Wrong And Should Be Relieved Of My Debit Card please ???

will go and look at Converse- I am still wanting some...
hope you aren't waiting around for too long...
Am going to post some work today...

I prefer B but for me it'll aklways be a plain classic pair (am not a flowery girl really)

Sadly waves

I've not been on mumsnet in an age. I've been going off my head and posting weird shit on other forums and I know mumsnet has low tolerance for that lol

I had a proper biopsy on wednesday. It was horrific. was horrific. 4 needles bent against the tumour and they had to use something like a drill bit to get it to crack for a sample. My Husband feinted! It was done in the X Ray department and I'm having flashbacks to the feeling when they were making sawing like actions in my neck. I can't take this anymore

Also, my DH and I might well be breaking up.

God I'm glad I got that out.

Jeeze Autumn that biopsy sounds horrific !
And I'm so sorry about you and DH , do you have any other support to help you through all this ?

Thanks Topsy x

I have my friend Gayle. And hopefully you all too! DH and I is not really so much about the tumour, just issues that have been brought to the front out of it. We still get on and he will always be my friend but I feel like the relationship has been a lie. I've tried to make it work but now I feel like I'm flogging a dead horse. He wants counselling so we'll see. I can't force myself to feel things.

I'm sorry I'm so in n out of here. I feel like I haven't the right to be here. I don't know why. I'm fucking mental.

As a friend, he has always been the best. As someone in a relationship he's controlling and verbally abusive. When we get on it's all good but when I disagree with him he changes very quickly and gets agressive with the door slamming etc and abuse. He lies to me a lot too. He always tries to make things my fault.

On the other side, he buys me nice coffee, cooks all the meals, is a hands-on Dad, is great company whrn we're sharing common interests and has been an abolute rock through the current crisis I'm having with my tumour.

He wants to try counselling but honestly I'm past that point. I told him that I don't trust him and it's obvious that he doesn't trust me if he lies all the time. He's done anger management, been on heart meds to control his heart rate to disable him from getting ohysically angry and he's made promise after empty promise.

If we split I have said that he can stay here and I will help him find a house. He says he is afraid and wants us to get help. I told him that the only time he's ever taken action has been when he's thought he might lose us and that it's not enough to be galvanised by fear. He mut want this for himself.

He's ignoring it hoping it will go away. I find the idea of us seperating appealing where before I would just have been afraid.

Oh Autumn - I'm so sorry - you are going through a hell of a lot at the moment - The biopsy sounds horrible, you know honestly if they are going to mess about with it anymore before they remove it or whatever the plan is, I would insist they use either GA or heavy sedation - there's no need for you to go through horrible processes fully conscious. Are you any further on with them knowing what it is exactly and what they are going to do about it?

I'm also truly sorry about you relationship problems - it must be very hard, but I'm sure when you have reached a decision you will know it is the right one, because it will feel right IYKWIM. It's obviously not what you need to be dealing with at the moment though.

Please come on here whenever you want - of course you belong here - you are part of our little family now - and don't worry about feeling shitty, or talking shit - I do that on a daily basis! Take care of yourself sweetie and come on for a natter whenever you need too xx

topsy - don't get up to any mischief with gracie - remember to act like ladies who lunch not the reprobates we all know you are

I'm just going to check out the converse ...... I like A best - they are a total snazzfest (that's a good thing).

waving to MAS - and everyone else

I am waiting for the GP to phone me so I can get some pain relief, - was up all night again and I am going even more bonkers with this pain, - I shall beg if necessary

Bloody hell autumn - talk about a lot on your plate. Of course you are welcome here . I have been thinking of how you are getting on.

And am so sorry biopsy was so hideous.

am feeling a lot brighter today - I do like idea of lunch mas and also the other things I could do so ideas welcome. So far I have a big Ebay project in mind from some of nicer bits I have come across in clear out.

I would love to come to see you topsy but the issue is logistics (prob best not to travel when in low immunity bit and am wary of travel by plane as it is sure fire way to catch things ime).

Sorting out big gigs extensive wardrobe and checking out what she needs for
School uniform as if I leave it til last minute they won't have her size (have most of it second hand).

and toffee chocolate fingers on fbs trolley. Operation chub up continues here ;)

Oh Autumn, what a lot you have on your plate. The biopsy sounds like a nightmare, and your domestic situation awful, too.

You have every right to be here, and we want to help as much as we can, even if it's just an ear, a virtual handhold, and a virtual . xx

Autumn - I have plumped up the cushions on the tamoxifen sofa, and put the kettle on. You have everyone here to support you, you are going through a dreadful time, but you are clearly incredibly strong.

Love to all of you, sorry I have not been here much lately, been very frantic this end, but everything ok so don't worry. Dd1 is seven today (how on earth did that happen) so I have put some lovely homemade chocolate brithday cake on the fbs trolley for you all..

Happy birthday to dd1 sparkle !

autumn that all sounds truly awful for you- I'd've fainted too- poor,poor love- please feel you can come here anytime to vent or have some comforting and fbs of course.
Wise not to want to go on plane gig - am sure that's why ds has been so coughy -he still is.
Have just emailed you btw x

and kk really hope you can get something to ease your pains xxxx

Happy birthday little Sparklette - have a lovely day - and yes where does the time go Sparkle? she is a big girl now!

Ooh chocolate cake

Oh Autumn. Does sound like you've crossed a threshold with your DH. Please stay here with us. We can listen and distract you and maybe even help a bit too. That biopsy sounds awful. No wonder you're having flashbacks.

Gracie's the new Delia then, eh - can't be Nigella as we're all too breast challenged. Hope you and our Topsy are okay today and fit some buns in amidst the medical things.

Topsy, I think you need those converse. Hands off Mr Branagh though. Am not sure why, but I quite like him too. Wallander has to be the worst cop ever. Last night he got a colleague shot, his wife was attacked right under his nose, then he let someone commit suicide right next to him. Still cute though.

Kurri that pain sounds horrid. Hope GP calls soon. Can't you just go to the surgery and insist??

Gig, I could trundle across to distract you with lunch too. Glad you're feeling brighter. Is the shoulder less ouch?

Sometimes how's dd? Did she get the classmates she wanted?

MAS well done on work ready for posting. I wish mine was..!

x-posted, yes Happy Birthday to little Sparkle. 7's a lovely age.