**TAMOXIFEN**22 !

[MaryAnnSingleton]

yikes- here we go...

oh I hope so kk !

Mas blog is a great idea ! Go you !

Gracie that's a bit of a bugger isn't it ? I have my wig sitting on a polystyrene head unworn if you want it ?
BTW the Buffs , you just pull them onto your head like a hat , then tuck the end in at the back .
I wore Buffs all the time , and got asked where I got them from all the time at the chemo rooms

topsy am guessing that's your comment on the blog ? Have just written an introduction,fuelled by a glass of wine. Please tell me if I gt boring though.

Yes it was me mas .
I too am fueled by wine tonight

arf

Have read And posted on your blogmas - I think you are brave and it's a great idea.

gracie that's a shame re wig but does sound that it's not for everyone so can see why not worth going for expensive one. Ignorant question here but how long do you need one (I suppose I ask as that would affect how I would deal with it).

I went to fishmongers and green grocers as well as having lovely nct meet up (so nice to discuss night feeds and Jabs).

Still feeling a bit wobbly about scan (I don't know if maybe cos period coming) but my mum coming up to hold my hand tomorrow for wound check and rads refit . Am getting a bit hospitaled out

Still and the apprentice will help.

amber your post makes me feel tired reading it

Did you ever tell the NCT crowd about your diagnosis gig ? Or did you decide to keep shtum ?

It's wine and The Apprentice for me tonight too .

Told them and they have been fine- one of them had friend who had bc and Helped with her baby so was actually very helpful as knew what her friend went through.

Bless them for being so nice about it

It's hard telling people isn't it ?
I made DH tell most people

I did same with dh. Most people ok about it - even when could see were struggling.

Back to four rooms whilst I wait for main event on tv

MAS, great blog!

Just back from ds's rugby match. They won!! So many mums delighted to see me back there, hollering like a politer version of a fishwife on the sidelines I've missed all the rugby touring etc whilst I've been out of action.

hooray for ds amber and for you being a rugby mum again
I like the secret handshake too
Apprentice night is always looked forward to chez MAS
Good luck with your refit gig - very pesky to have to go through that kerfuffle again.

Yay at rugby mum amber

Suspect today will be long and tedious with refit - I had less fits for my wedding dress.

will be thinking of you..
We're off this morning so will say bye now in case I don't get back before we go-will miss you all very much. Love to everyone xxxx

MA - have just had a quick read of your blog and I think it is great, and going to be a great help. Mine is intermittent too, but I find it really helps to clear my mind. Have a lovely time and i am glad DH's job seems more settled. x

Gracie £175? Bugger me

Er yes, they are a bit pricey, but if they last a year or more with good care, that's no haircuts or colourings etc, so it's not too bad that way. My job means I really do have to look like I have hair...I wouldn't have gotten away with scarves etc as the world of the male-dominated professions doesn't cope with women's breast cancer conversations, and I need to be able to 'sell' my business.

Been ages since I've posted - DS does not respect my need to Mumsnet use the computer in the holidays. Cbeebies website has too much appeal! He is very funny, and has to move his whole body in the same direction as the mouse, while sticking out his tongue in concentration

Been to church this morning to practice for wedding I am playing for on Saturday - luckily my fingers seem to be behaving, and rendering some approximation of the correct notes. "All you need is love" to walk in to - very cool!

MAS blog looks excellent, and definitely very therapeutic. You have a really "easy to read" writing style. Will follow with interest! Hope you have a lovely time. Big hugs x

topsy hope the tide of sick and cough medicine-inducing coughing has subsided in the topsy house? Hope you had some success with sleeping - its such a nightmare when you can't. Take it easy x

gig sorry your rads have been postponed. What a frustration for you, although I guess you would rather that they got it right. I'll happily park my arse on the paranoia box for you today, my love. Glad you had a good time with your NCT friends. It is nice to do "normal" things sometimes.

eight Hi chemo buddy! How you doing today? Hope the aches and pains have subsided. It is the thing I am most fearing with the docetaxol. Hope you are a bit more comfortable. What is CSF injection? Is that part of the docetaxol?

gracie Have you got on to your GP about ADs yet? Hope you have had a chance to get them sorted - it really can even out the lumps and bumps of this crappy journey. I wear Buffs - they are easy to wear, once you get the hang of it. I find that if I put it on like a headband, all scrunched up (think John MacEnroe), grab the bit at the back of your head and twist it over once or twice, so that you have a thicker "band", then you can pull the back of the front bit iyswim, over your head and tuck it in. You end up with a sort of turban, with a bulkier bit at the back that holds it all tight. Experiment, and you'll figure out a good way for you.

figgy how's the haircut?! Sorry to hear your wound has opened up - what a pain. Hope its on the way to healing soon.

Nice one, you energetic lady! Hope you felt energised and encouraged by it.

kurri Hope you are OK. Any more fish dreams? Sounds like the driving is going well.

sometimes ! Good to see you! Suspect you have been working ridiculously hard, so hope you are OK. You definitely deserve a holiday. Cornwall sounds lovely - will send you some good weather vibes x

Any sign of smee ? When's she due back, I can't remember?!

Waves to everyone - sending you all big hugs for this chilly Thursday x x x x

Gorgeous sunny morning here today, bit chilly but the sun is always lovely to see.

mas your blog is great, very easy to read and bound to be therapeutic. Have a great time on your trip. Has the BCN phoned yet?

gig Think I will need the wig for about a year as I though I was having 6 chemo but consultant confirmed I was having 8 and then 5 weeks radiotherapy. Stressing me a bit as everywhere I read people get 6 chemo. Does 8 seem a lot?

Amber another rugby mum here . I try to contain myself but my mil is banned as she is manic. DH said he used to pretend he didn't know her when he was playing as she was so bad.

Ned I haven't phoned GP yet. I am worried she will think I'm not coping and I feel if I make an appointment I will just blubber the whole way through. The last time I was there my dad had just had his diagnosis and I blubbed the whole way through that appointment so she is bound to think I'm just being stupid. My mood is very up and down but I feel as if every so often I have a bit like a panic attack (I sound an absolute weirdo).

I am still waiting my CT scan, MRI scan results. My consultant is on holiday. Do you think my BCN would give me the results if I phoned her?

Hi Ned!! Ooo lovely wedding thingy ahead for you then!

Gracie, re your mil! 1 person in every 3 has treatment for anxiety or depression so GPs are very very used to people sobbing in their surgeries. Fear not. (er, easier said than done). Can you take a trusted friend with you for moral support? Feeling up and down and panicky is totally 100% normal (just not good to live through). It tends to get much better once we've done all the panicking bit and get life back into a routine of sorts.

Yes, ring that BCN and ask what happens in the absence of the consultant. There's normally a holiday spare who can talk you through things if the BCN can't? Or they can get results to your local doc I think (not sure).

hi all. am in hospital after high temperatre tuesday night. Was expecting to be given antiobitcs and sent home but was admitted instead. I feel embarrisingly fine but bored stiff and hope to get release soon. Gracie I dont think 8 sessions is sinister -well Ihope not as thats what i'm on.

gracie I sobbed my way through 3 GPs appointments in a very short space of time before I got my ADs, and it was very cathartic and absolutely fine. obviously it depends on how you get on with your GP, but Dr Lovely ( I am very lucky mine is fab) was completely unfazed by my weeping and was well equipped with tissues! Sometimes it's just what you need to do. Please think about making the appointment. I'll hold your hand for you x x

Several have had 8 sessions - oneineight is, I know, and I am sure others have too. Don't read too much in to it, I think. Definitely phone BCN - if she can give you the results then she will.

amber very much looking forward to wedding thingy! It's our nanny/ childminder getting married, and she's been completely brilliant since my dx, looking after me as much as she has DS! I hope I can do her proud it's been such a focus for me to look forward to, knowing it was going to be at the half way point in my chemo. Hopefully it will be an amazing day!

Oneineight - eek about the hospital! But glad that they're taking it seriously and checking you until they know your immune system is handling it ok. No daytime tele to be thrilled by, or nice Readers Digest magazines from 1947 to read?

I had 8 sessions of chemo. It's fairly standard for certain types and ages where someone is fit and healthy to start with, as it gives the best odds. It's not a sign of certain doom.

X post eight hope you're OK? What have they said? Just sit and wait and see? Poor you. Have you got magazines / books/ iPod to keep you amused? Sending you big positive vibes x

Luckily there is a tv, radio and internet access in room now Ihave worked out how to use it - ouch at price - pity long stay patents. Am on i.v. antibiotics -temperature is back to normal today - and if it stays down will be released tomorrow. Ned -csf is injections to boost the immune system - not terribly effective in my case it seems!

Oh no oneineight hope you get out soon. I remember DH phoned me on the Patientline when I was in with hyperemesis thinking it would be cheaper. Flipping call cost about £25. Glad (well not glad but you know what I mean) that 8 is not a bad thing.

ned have text the bcn so will see if she can give me my results. I am sure she is going to ask me to be transferred as I have phoned her about 4 or 5 times since dx. Your nanny sounds fab.

gig what about your nanny? Is she back yet?